WikiIslam - User contributions [en]

Khadijah bint Khuwaylid

2013-07-19T01:58:20Z

1234567:

[[File:Khadija.jpg|right|thumb|Khadijah’s “medal” in ''Promptuarii iconum insigniorum'' (1553). Lyon: Rouillé. This illustration made no pretence of being an accurate “portrait” but it has become a widely accepted symbolic representation of Khadijah.|200px]]

'''Khadijah''' or '''Khadīja bint Khuwaylid''' (خديجة بنت خويلد‎) was Prophet [[Muhammad]]’s first wife and she was his only wife as long as she lived.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 127, note 918. {{Muslim|31|5975}}.</ref> She is known to Muslims as ''al-Kubra'' (“the Great”)<ref>E.g., [http://www.al-islam.org/khadija/ Razwy, S. A. A. (1990). ''Khadija tul Kubra: A Short Story of Her Life''. New York: Tahrike Tarsile Qur'an.]</ref> and ''al-Tahira'' (“the Pure”).<ref>E.g., [http://l.b5z.net/i/u/6103974/f/wives_of_the_prophet.pdf/ Mus’ad, M. F. (2001). ''Wives of the Prophet Muhammad: their Strives and Their Lives'', p. 7. Cairo: Islamic Inc.]</ref> Twelve of [[Muhammad's Wives|Muhammad’s wives]] are credited with the title ''Umm al-Muminun'' (“Mother of the Faithful”),<ref>{{Quran|33|6}}.</ref> but Khadijah occupies a unique position as the Mother of [[Islam]] itself.

==Background==

Khadijah was born in Mecca, a member of the dominant Quraysh tribe. Her grandfather Asad, chief of her clan, was a grandson of Qusayy ibn Kilab, Keeper of the [[Ka'aba|Ka’aba]] and ruler of Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 24, 82.</ref> This Qusayy had also been a great-great-great-grandfather of Muhammad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 3.</ref> Her mother, Fatima bint Za’ida, was from another Quraysh clan, the Amir ibn Luayy.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> The name ''Khadijah'' means “premature”,<ref>“Khadija” in [http://www.almaany.com/home.php?language=english&lang_name=Arabic&word=Khadija/ Almaany Arabic-English Dictionary]. [http://www.behindthename.com/name/Khadija/ Behind the Name].</ref> suggesting the circumstances of her birth.

The traditions about Khadijah’s early life are scarce and often contradictory. It is generally accepted that she was born “fifteen years before the Elephant” and that she was 65 ([[lunar]]) years old when she died,<ref>E.g., {{Tabari|6|p. 47}}.</ref> indicating a birth date between July 556 and July 557. However, the source of this tradition is Khadijah’s nephew, Hakim ibn Hizam,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:9, 11-12. {{Tabari|39|pp. 41, 106}}.</ref> who was one of the many early Muslims who claimed his own age to be 120.<ref>{{Muslim|10|3662}}. See also {{Tabari|39|pp. 40, 43}}, where Huwaytib ibn Abduluzza claims to be 120 years old, yet in the same breath betrays that he cannot count.</ref> By contrast, Abdullah ibn Abbas, the cousin who lived at Muhammad’s side through the final years in [[Medina]],<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 95}}.</ref> stated that “on the day Khadijah married Allah’s Messenger, she was 28 years old.”<ref>[http://qurango.com/images/b/5/293.jpg/ Ibn Kathir, ''Al-Bidaya wa’l-Nihaya'' vol. 5 p. 293]. Majlisi, ''Bihar al-Anwar'' vol. 16 p. 12. Ibn Ishaq, cited in Al-Hakim al-Nishaburi, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 3 p. 182.</ref> If this is correct, she was born between March 568 and March 569. Variant traditions claim other years.<ref>See [https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister, M. J. (1993). The Sons of Khadija. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 16'', 59-95.]</ref> Whatever her precise date of birth, she was still of childbearing age as late as 605.

Khadijah’s personality is described as “determined and intelligent”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> Although it is not explicitly stated that her father was a merchant, “the Quraysh were a people given to commerce,”<ref>Guilaume/Ishaq, p. 82.</ref> so Khadijah may have spent her childhood sitting in the bazaars learning to negotiate bargains. Her known siblings were two brothers, Hizam<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 160.</ref> and Al-Awwam,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115.</ref> two sisters, Ruqayqa<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:180.</ref> and Hala,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|168}}</ref> and a paternal half-brother, Nawfal.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 177.</ref> At one stage, there was talk of [[Marriage|marrying]] Khadijah off to her [[Cousin Marriage in Islam|cousin]], Waraqa ibn Nawfal, but this never happened.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:9.</ref>

==Husbands==

Khadijah’s first husband was Atiq ibn A’idh (or Abid), a junior member of the Makhzum clan.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918. Bewley/Saad 8:151.</ref> The Makhzumites had grown wealthy on trade, and their generosity had won them the loyalty of their neighbours. They were now serious contenders for the leadership of the city.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 142-143. See also Bewley/Saad 8:61; {{Tabari|39|p. 196}}.</ref> This match was therefore a step up the social scale for Khadijah, though perhaps a small step if her family also had money. Atiq and Khadijah had two children, suggesting – since Khadijah produced her children within two-year intervals<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:10. [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 36.2/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:36:2].</ref> – that the marriage lasted between two and four years. From their daughter, Hind, Khadijah derived her ''kunya'' Umm Hind.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:9. {{Tabari|39|p. 161}}.</ref> Their son, Abdullah,<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> died in infancy.<ref>[http://www.oocities.org/tirmidhihadith/page1.html/ Tirmidhi 117].</ref> Most sources state that Atiq died,<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 127}}.</ref> although there is a variant tradition that the marriage ended in divorce.<ref>[https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister (1993)] summarises these sources, citing Ibn Ishaq, as transmitted by Yunus ibn Bukayr, ''Al-Siyar wa-l-Maghazi'' p. 82, and Majlisi, ''Bihar al-Anwar'' vol. 16 p. 10, for Atiq’s death, and Baladhuri, ''Ansab al-Ashraf'' vol. 1 pp. 406-407, for divorce.</ref>

Khadijah then married a Bedouin nobleman, Malik ibn An-Nabbash, who was from the Tamim tribe. In the way of nomads who aspired to an urban lifestyle, Malik and his two brothers had immigrated to Mecca and formed an alliance with the Abduldar clan of the Quraysh.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:9, 151. {{Tabari|9|p. 127}}. {{Tabari|39|p. 79}}.</ref> Given their highborn origins, the Tamim brothers would have interacted with their new allies as equals rather than as vassals. To complete their Meccan citizenship, they sought Quraysh wives, to whom they could offer rank, connections and probably also money. It is interesting that Malik chose Khadijah, for the Asad clan was the traditional rival of Abduldar.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 57.</ref> Their marriage produced three children, suggesting that it lasted between four and six years. From their first son, Hala, Malik took his ''kunya'' Abu Hala.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:9. [https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister (1993)] documents sources in which Malik was also known as Hind and his son Hala was also known as Al-Harith. It was not uncommon for Arabs to be known by alternative and apparently unrelated names.</ref> Their second son was, confusingly, also named Hind.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918. Bewley/Saad 8:9.</ref> Their daughter, Zaynab,<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> probably died young, as no more is heard about her, and Khadijah later mentioned that she had borne each of her first two husbands a child who had died in infancy.<ref>[http://www.oocities.org/tirmidhihadith/page1.html/ Tirmidhi 117].</ref>

In contradiction to all this, some sources state that Khadijah married Abu Hala first and Atiq second.<ref>E.g., Bewley/Saad 8:9.</ref> However, a ''kunya'' was usually taken from a firstborn child, indicating that Umm Hind and Abu Hala did not share the same firstborn.

It is not known when or how Abu Hala died, but the Sacrilegious War against the Qays-Aylan tribe dominated the years 591–594.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82. [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 32.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:32:1]. Strangely, Ibn Hisham note 124 claims an outbreak date as early as 585. Although note 124 was designed to be read immediately after the statement of Ibn Ishaq that it contradicts, there is not a word of explanation for the inconsistency. However, the preliminary hostilities commenced several years before the first full-fledged battle ([http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap2.htm/ Muir (1861) vol. 2 pp. 2-5]). One possible explanation is that Ibn Hisham deliberately confused the first informal skirmish (when Muhammad was 14) with the first battle proper (when Muhammad was 20) so that his youth might excuse his lack of prowess in the fighting [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap2.htm/ (Muir, 1861, pp. 6-7f)].</ref> Khadijah’s brother Hizam was killed in the second round of the conflict,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 41}}</ref> and their father Khuwaylid, who must have been some sixty years old, was a commander on the field.<ref>Waqidi, ''Kitab al-Maghazi'', cited in [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap2.htm/ Muir (1861) vol. 2 pp. 7f9, 22, 24f28].</ref> After Abu Hala’s death, several prominent citizens proposed marriage to the widowed Khadijah, some of them investing great sums of money into their courtship, but her father vetoed every match.<ref>{{Tabari|6|pp. 48-49}}. [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 35.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:35:1].</ref>

==Business==

Khadijah was the richest woman in Mecca. This explains why she attracted so many suitors. By the time Abu Hala died, she had become “a merchant woman of dignity and wealth. She used to hire men to carry merchandise outside the country.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> While the claims that “half the trade in Mecca” belonged to Khadijah<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref> are doubtless exaggerated, she may well have been the wealthiest single trader. The traditions do not state in what commodity she dealt, but among the exports of Mecca are mentioned leather, wool, perfume, silver, cheese and dried raisins.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 424, 547, 716. See also Crone, P. (2007). Quraysh and the Roman army: Making sense of the Meccan leather trade. ''Bulletin of SOAS, 70'', 63–88.</ref> Nor is it known how she originally acquired her business. Perhaps her father helped to set her up, but this opens the question of why Khadijah became more prosperous than any of her siblings. If she had a backer not available to them, it was probably one or both of her husbands. Or perhaps the business flourished because of Khadijah’s personal talents and efforts.

Muslim apologists sometimes point to Khadijah’s independence and success as an example of the great opportunities that Islam grants to women. Typical claims cite her as an example of the "vibrant, liberating spirit of early Islam"<ref>"''Khadija, the first wife of the Prophet ... an outstanding female liberating figure in history ... can help us reclaim the vibrant, liberating spirit of early Islam. That alone could go a long way in removing the current image of Muslims among non Muslims.''" - Bandukwala, J. S. “Hazrat Khadija was an outstanding female liberating figure in history,” letter to the editor in ''New Age Islam'', 22 May 2010.</ref> or state that the modern-day justifications for "denying girls an equal chance at success lies in archaic interpretations of religion".<ref>"''For Muslim girls everywhere, Khadijah is one of the first female role models introduced by parents and teachers of religion. A self-made businesswoman … She had already created her own success … The justification for denying girls an equal chance at success lies in archaic interpretations of religion… There is nothing contradictory about being a powerful Muslim female.''" - Saraswati, R. E. (2012). “[http://www.aquila-style.com/focus-points/khadijah-bint-khuwaylid-one-of-the-four-perfect-women/ Khadijah Bint Khuwaylid: Perfect Woman]” in ''Aquila Style''.</ref> These claims are illogical, since Khadijah’s career was established before Islam existed. What it really demonstrates is the opportunities that pre-Islamic Arabs (sometimes) granted to women, who not only mingled freely with men in the market-place but were also respected for doing so. Most merchants were men, but among the women were the very pagan Hind bint Utba<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:165.</ref> and the perfumer Asma bint Mukharriba.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:209.</ref><ref>[http://www.encislam.brill.nl/public/makka/ “Makka” in Bearman, P., Bianquis, T., Bosworth, C. E., van Donzel, E., & Heinrichs, W. P. (Eds.). (2006). '''Encyclopaedia of Islam, 2nd Ed.'' Brill Online.]</ref> After Khadijah died, Muslim women were ordered to stay at home and wear veils,<ref>{{Quran|33|54}}</ref> and it became impossible for an adherent Muslim woman to conduct any such enterprise. Khadijah had no way of knowing that within a decade of her death, her lifestyle would be forbidden to the women of Arabia.

In the spring of 595, Khadijah required a new agent to accompany her camels to Syria. Her brother’s wife’s brother, Abu Talib ibn Abdulmuttalib,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 162, 585. Bewley/Saad 8:29.</ref> recommended the services of his ward, a nephew whom he could no longer afford to keep. Khadijah agreed to hire him for a higher commission than she usually paid.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 34.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:34:2.] Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref> His name was Muhammad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref>

Two months later Muhammad returned to Mecca with merchandise worth nearly double what Khadijah had expected.<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 48}}. Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref> Goods commonly imported from Syria included grain, oil, wine, weapons, cotton and linen.<ref>Crone, P. (2007). [http://www.encislam.brill.nl/public/makka/ “Makka” in Bearman, P., et al. (Eds.) (2006).]</ref> As Khadijah worked on a profit-share basis,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> she doubled Muhammad’s commission.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref> It is said that Khadijah later dispatched him on a second trip, this time to Tihama<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 49}}</ref> in Yemen to import frankincense, myrrh and fine textiles.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 128, 158, 271.</ref> It is not clear whether Khadijah took the unusual step of sending her agent southwards in the heat of summer<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 58. [http://www.encislam.brill.nl/public/makka/ “Makka” in Bearman, P., et al. (Eds.) (2006).] See also {{Quran|106|2}}.</ref> in order to import a near-monopoly; or whether this second venture occurred during a subsequent winter, after Muhammad and Khadijah were already married, and the detail that she “employed” him is an error; or whether the whole timeline has been confused, and these events occurred over a longer timespan than is usually assumed. What is certain is that by the summer of 595, Khadijah had decided to marry her agent.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82; Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref>

==Why Muhammad Married Her==

Khadijah sent as her intermediary Nafisa bint Umayya, a freedwoman from Abu Hala’s tribe.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:10, 172. She is sometimes known matrilinearly as Nafisa bint Munya, suggesting that she was illegitimate.</ref> Nafisa approached Muhammad at the bazaar and asked why he had never married. He replied that he could not afford to support a family. “But if money were no obstacle,” Nafisa persisted, “would you be willing to marry a lady of wealth, rank and beauty?” Muhammad asked which lady of that description would be willing to take him, and Nafisa named Khadijah. Muhammad instantly expressed his willingness.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 35.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:35:1].</ref> When Khadijah next sent for Muhammad, it was to make a formal proposal. She spoke of how his noble ancestry, good reputation and personal honesty rendered him eligible, and offered herself as his wife.<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 48}}.</ref>

When Muhammad told Nafisa that he had always wanted to marry but could not afford it, he was speaking directly from his personal experience. He had hoped to marry his cousin Fakhita, but Abu Talib had prevented it by giving her to a wealthy man and telling Muhammad that the family needed to marry money.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 196}}. Bewley/Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:109.</ref> So Muhammad was looking for a wife and was in a frame of mind to consider any reasonable offer. Khadijah’s offer, of course, was beyond reasonable. She was the Arab equivalent of a multi-millionaire, and her patronage was the most extraordinary luck for Muhammad.

Muslim commentators have stressed how Khadijah was a “much older” woman and therefore Muhammad must have been noble and high-minded to marry her for her character rather than her physical charms.<ref>"''The Beloved Holy prophet preferred to have his first marriage with a fifteen years older widow shows [''sic''] how the Beloved Holy Prophet had a value of nobility and character more than anything else.''" - Saleem, H. M. (2012). [http://www.bzu.edu.pk/PJIR/eng%201%20Hafiz%20M.pdf/ Justification of the marriages of the Beloved Holy prophet.] ''Pakistan Journal of Islamic Research, 9'', 1-20.</ref> It would be difficult, however, to prove that Muhammad was attracted only to Khadijah’s character and not to her money. While she was to prove both loyal and sympathetic,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 111</ref> it is not clear that Muhammad had had the opportunity to assess these character-qualities in advance. It is certain that he had had the opportunity to assess her wealth.

Nor is there any reason to assume that Khadijah was physically unattractive. If the report of Abdullah ibn Abbas is correct, she was a mere three years older than Muhammad, which hardly qualifies as an age-difference. While a modern hagiography that describes her as “beautiful, tall and light-skinned”<ref>[http://www.maaref-foundation.com/english/library/pro_ahl/fatima/fatima_the_gracious/03.htm/ Ordoni, Abu M. (1987). ''Fatima the Gracious'', p. 27. Qum: Ansariyan Publications.]</ref> does not cite early sources, the servant Nafisa had also mentioned that she was “beautiful”.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 35.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:35:1].</ref> Even if Nafisa was exaggerating (the word “beautiful” in this context usually means “normal-looking” as opposed to deformed or ugly), she achieved no purpose in telling an outright lie to a man who already knew what Khadijah looked like.

==Controversial Wedding==

Khadijah asked for a dower of 20 camels.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82; Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> Twenty camels would have been worth about £8,000,<ref>Numerous ''ahadith'' such as {{Bukhari|2|24|528}} and {{Muslim|10|3893}} indicate that a camel cost about 80 ''dirhams'', although this varied with the age and health of the camel. Hence 20 camels would be worth 1,600 ''dirhams''. {{Bukhari|5|59|357}} indicates that an annual income of 5,000 ''dirhams'' was a comfortable living, so Khadijah’s dower was equivalent to four months’ (middle-class) income. However, it seems that a frugal person could survive on a ''dirham'' a day ([http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life4/chap25.htm/ Muir (1861) vol. 4 p. 156]), so the same sum came to over four years’ wages for a labourer. While it is almost impossible to calculate equivalent prices for such a different culture, the ''dirham'', a silver coin, was the price of a wooden bowl or a ground-sheet ({{Abudawud|9|1637}}) or a cheap necklace ({{Abudawud|14|2704}}), so we might, very roughly, think of a ''dirham'' as £5. A ''dinar'', a gold coin worth 10 ''dirhams'', was the price of a sheep.</ref> which was four times the dower that Muhammad gave to any of his subsequent wives.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 189}}. See also Ibn Hisham note 918. The same 400 ''dirhams'' (£2,000) was also the ransom for a war-captive ({{Abudawud|14|2685}}) or the starting price for a slave ({{Tabari|39|p. 6}}).</ref> This suggests that Khadijah was “worth four women” to him, i.e. that it was part of their marriage contract that he would not take another wife in her lifetime. A poor man like Muhammad would have had some trouble amassing such a hefty gift, even if he returned all the beasts that Khadijah had personally given him (she had paid his commissions in camels).<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 34.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:34:2.]</ref> His good fortune in attracting the wealthiest woman in Mecca must have delighted the investment-seeking Abu Talib, and we can only assume that the family combined resources to raise the dower.

Marriage required the consent of the bride’s guardian, and Khadijah’s father Khuwaylid had refused her previous suitors. She therefore plotted to secure his permission through trickery. She plied her father with wine until he was drunk. Then she slaughtered a cow, covered his shoulders with a new striped robe and sprinkled him with perfume, whereupon Muhammad and his uncles entered the house. Khadijah extracted the legally binding words from her father while he was too inebriated to know what he was saying. As the day wore on and the wedding party was in full swing, Khuwaylid recovered his sobriety enough to ask, “What is this meat, this robe and this perfume?” Khadijah replied, “You have given me in marriage to Muhammad ibn Abdullah.” Khuwaylid was as furious as his daughter had expected, protesting that he had never consented to any such thing and even unsheathing his sword. Muhammad’s kin also brandished weapons before everyone realised that the matter was not worth actual bloodshed. It was too late. Muhammad was Khadijah’s husband.<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 49}}. [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 35.4/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:35:4, 5.] See also Guillaume/Ishaq 83 and Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Although the Muslim historian Waqidi denied this embarrassing story (even while reporting it), the British historian Muir points out that nobody had any reason to fabricate it. The tradition is from two independent sources, both of whom were biased in Muhammad’s favour and neither of whom had any reason to disparage Khadijah’s father or his clan. Two further independent sources, without mentioning the drunken party, state that it was Khuwaylid who married Khadijah to Muhammad. Although Waqidi claims that it was Khadijah’s uncle who gave her away because her father had died before the Sacrilegious War (591-594), his pupil Ibn Saad names Khuwaylid as a commander in that war. Muir therefore concludes that the tradition of Khuwaylid’s death “has been invented, to throw discredit on the story of his drunkenness.”<ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap2.htm/ Muir (1861) vol. 2 p. 24f]. See also {{Tabari|6|pp. 48-50}}; Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

This story highlights the Arab assumption that marriage was a contract between bridegroom and father-in-law in which they transferred the guardianship of a woman. It was somewhat similar to buying a camel: the purchase required the consent of the vendor. Muhammad never questioned this view of marriage. It would have been highly convenient for him to perceive some of his marriages, including the one to Khadijah, as purely a contract between husband and wife. Yet there is no evidence that this concept ever occurred to him, even after he declared himself the final prophet who was wise for all time and had authority to change all the rules. To the end of his life, he was particular about meeting the legal requirement to contract with a guardian;<ref>E.g., see Bewley/Saad 8:63, 65; {{Tabari|39|pp. 178-179}}; Bewley/Saad 8:105.</ref> he never questioned that every woman belonged to a man.

This story also reveals how Khadijah and Muhammad understood consent. It did not need to be “free” or “informed”; any type of consent was legally binding. This theme was to recur in Muhammad’s life. He was to extract consent at sword-point,<ref>E.g., Guillaume/Ishaq 547.</ref> under duress,<ref>E.g., Guillaume/Ishaq 314-315. Bewley/Saad 8:87-88.</ref> from an immature or unsound mind,<ref>E.g., Bewley/Saad 8:43.</ref> by withholding essential information,<ref>E.g., Guillaume/Ishaq 463-464. {{Tabari|39|p. 165}}.</ref> by offering a false dichotomy between two bad alternatives,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:40. Guillaume/Ishaq 493.</ref> by exploiting spiritual beliefs,<ref>[http://altafsir.com/Tafasir.asp?tMadhNo=0&tTafsirNo=74&tSoraNo=33&tAyahNo=36&tDisplay=yes&UserProfile=0/ Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' Q33:36]. See also {{Quran|33|36}}. {{Bukhari|3|43|648}}, {{Muslim|4|3511}}.</ref> through bribery<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 438; 594-597.</ref> or by making promises that he intended to break.<ref>E.g., Guillaume/Ishaq 504, 509. Bewley/Saad 8:181-182.</ref> Yet he never suggested there was any kind of ethical problem in extracting consent in whatever manner might succeed; it was the one who consented to Muhammad, no matter how, who was morally obliged to stand by his word.

==Marriage to Muhammad==

Muhammad and Khadijah were married for 25 years. Modern biographies of Khadijah sometimes claim her duties during the first fifteen years of her marriage were "purely those of a housewife and a mother,"<ref>"''During the first fifteen years of her marriage, Khadija’s duties were purely those of a housewife and a mother.''" - Razwy, S. A. A. (1990). ''Khadija-Tul-Kubra: The Wife of the Prophet Muhammed'', p. 146. New York: Tahrike Tarsile Qur’an.</ref> or that she "decided to retire and enjoy a comfortable life with her husband who, on his part, preferred an ascetic life to that of money making."<ref>"''Khadija ... felt no need to keep trading and increasing her wealth; instead, she decided to retire and enjoy a comfortable life with her husband who, on his part, preferred an ascetic life to that of money making.''" - [http://www.al-islam.org/biographies/khadija.htm/ Al-Jibouri, Y. T. (1994). ''Khadija Daughter of Khuwaylid, Wife of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh).'']</ref>

These creative interpretations do not accord with early records that Muhammad went into partnership with a Makhzumite, Qays ibn Saayib, and sold merchandise in his shop.<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 4 p. 352.</ref> Since Muhammad was not producing anything by means of a craft, he could only have sold items in Mecca if he had imported them from elsewhere; and if he could pay for imports, he must have been exporting at a profit. In other words, Khadijah’s business continued after their marriage exactly as it had beforehand.

This circumstance explains a great deal about Muhammad’s relationship with Khadijah. His assertion that Khadijah “spent her wealth for me”<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118.</ref> indicates his keen awareness that the money was hers and not his. However important his managerial position in the family firm, and however generously Khadijah shared her wealth, she remained in control of her own money. Muhammad was effectively his wife’s employee. He was in no position to displease her, for he would have lost everything if he had dared to stray. Therefore he was not only faithful to Khadijah but he also allowed her to make all their major decisions.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 313.</ref> He was neither so faithful nor so obliging to any of his subsequent wives. In other words, Muhammad made the best husband to the only one of his wives who was able to dictate the terms of their relationship.

It should not be assumed that Muhammad’s fidelity to Khadijah caused him any particular hardship. She was equally faithful to him; and to judge by the regularity of her childbearing, his quickness to “draw close to her” for comfort,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 106</ref> and her deliberate ploy of using sex to distract him from his troubles,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 107; {{Tabari|6|p. 73}}.</ref> she made herself very sexually available to him. Muhammad’s compliance with this convenient arrangement therefore reveals more about his common sense than about his virtue.

==Children==

Khadijah brought three stepchildren into the marriage. It is striking how little is known about them. Later historians eagerly collected every possible scrap of information about Muhammad, down to how he cleaned his teeth<ref>{{Bukhari|1|4|245}}</ref> and his attitude to a broken sandal.<ref>{{Muslim|24|5235}}</ref> People who had lived under his roof should have been in high demand as eyewitnesses. Yet by the time the traditions were committed to writing, almost everything about his stepchildren had been forgotten. This implies that their lives did not intersect very much with those of the Muslim community.

[[File:KhadijaHouse.jpg|left|thumb|The ruins of Khadijah’s house in Mecca.|250px]]

Given that girls were often married off at puberty, it is possible that Muhammad never lived with his stepdaughter, Hind bint Atiq. She married a Makhzumite cousin, Sayfi ibn Umayya, to whom she bore at least one son, Muhammad ibn Sayfi. Though this Muhammad in his turn had descendants, it was said that none of the family survived; yet there is not a word about how they died.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:9.</ref>

Khadijah’s two sons lived with Muhammad for several years,<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 127}}. Note that Tabari assumes that Hind was a girl (''Hind'' and ''Hala'' were both unisex names, though more common for females), which only adds to the general confusion.</ref> and it is known that he liked to play with children.<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}. See also {{Bukhari|8|73|150}}.</ref> Of Hala it is recalled that “the Prophet arose and saw Hala in his room. He pressed him to his breast and uttered joyously: ‘Hala, Hala, Hala!’”<ref>Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' 6:516:8919, cited in [https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister (1993)].</ref> If this was all anyone could remember, then nobody remembered very much. Hala was later killed in a street-brawl after he challenged a man who had insulted Muhammad.<ref>Baladhuri, ''Ansab al-Ashraf''; Ibn Hajar, ''AI-Isaba'' 1:604:1501; both cited in [https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister (1993)].</ref> This was probably before Islam,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 79-80}}.</ref> as the Muslims never complained that their Prophet’s own stepson had been martyred for the cause.

The younger stepson, Hind, reminisced to his nephew, Hussayn ibn Ali, that Muhammad's "blessed face shone like the full moon… His modest habit was to look at something without staring... He greeted whomever he met ... He was not short-tempered, nor did he embarrass anyone…", and so on.<ref>"''[Muhammad’s] blessed face shone like the full moon… His modest habit was to look at something without staring... He greeted whomever he met ... He was not short-tempered, nor did he embarrass anyone… When he became angry with someone, he turned his face away from that person and either ignored him or forgave him. When he was happy due to humility it seemed as if he had closed his eyes. His laugh was mostly a smile, when his blessed front teeth glittered like white shining hailstones.''" - [http://www.hadithcollection.com/shama-iltirmidhi/269-shama-il-tirmidhi-chapter-01-the-noble-features-of-rasoolullah/191-shama-il-tirmidhi-chapter-001-hadith-number-007-007.html/ Tirmidhi, ''Shama’il'' 1:7]; [http://www.hadithcollection.com/shama-iltirmidhi/301-shama-il-tirmidhi-chapter-33-the-speech-of-rasoolullah/431-shama-il-tirmidhi-chapter-033-hadith-number-003-215.html/ Tirmidhi, ''Shama’il'' 33:3.]</ref> Perhaps Hind’s affection for his stepfather was real; there is no evidence of any conflict between them. However, he gave this memoir – and much more in similar vein – long after the Islamic empire was established, when only good things could be spoken of Muhammad; and he did not include any specific events from his childhood. It is clear that Hind was never in Muhammad’s inner circle. His name does not appear in Ibn Hisham’s recension of Ibn Ishaq’s ''Sirat'', which lists all the early converts and describes, name by name, the doings of the emigrants in Medina. Nor does he appear in the ''ahadith'' covering that period. This suggests that he did not become a Muslim until the conquest of Mecca in 630, when Muhammad appointed him a governor in Yemen.<ref>{{Tabari|3|pp. 228-230, 318-321, 328}}; Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' 3:515:3258; both cited in [https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister (1993)].</ref> The distant location of this post would have continued to keep him away from Muhammad’s intimate affairs. Hind died after 656 at Basra in Syria. “The market was cancelled that day, and there was no loading or unloading of ships.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 80}}.</ref> He had at least one son, also named Hind; but it is again reported that no descendants survived to the time of writing.<ref>Ibn al-Kalbi, ''Jamharat al-Nasabi'', cited in [https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister (1993)].</ref>

Over the next ten years, Khadijah bore six more children to Muhammad, attended at each birth by a midwife named Salma.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:10, 160.</ref> From their first son, Qasim, Muhammad took the ''kunya'' Abu Qasim. There followed Zaynab, Abdullah, Ruqayya, Umm Kulthum and Fatima.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:10. [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 36.2/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:36:2].</ref> Some historians name two additional sons, ''Al-Tahir'' (“the Pure”) or ''Al-Tayyib'' (“the Good”), but this is a misreading of Waqidi, who clearly states that these were both bynames given to Abdullah.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:10. [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 36.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:36:1]. Also cited in Muir (1861) 2:27f.</ref> Qasim and Abdullah both died in infancy; the girls all grew up.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82; Ibn Hisham note 918; Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref> Fatima, who looked like Muhammad<ref>{{Bukhari|4|56|819}}. {{Abudawud|41|5198}}.</ref> and was his favourite,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:16. [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1298&Itemid=122/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''] on {{Quran|66|11}}.</ref> is known to Muslims as ''az-Zahra'' (“the Dazzling”) and is regarded as a great saint.<ref>See [http://www.kalamullah.com/Books/women_around_the_messenger.pdf/ “Fatimah az-Zahra” in Qutb, M. A. (1995). ''Women around the Messenger''. Translated by A. A. Imam. Riyadh: International Islamic Publishing House] for a typical hagiography.</ref>

In addition to their biological children, Muhammad and Khadijah freed and adopted their slave-boy, Zayd ibn Haritha. Zayd was from the Udhra tribe. At a young age he was kidnapped by slave-traders and sold on the slave-market for 400 ''dirhams'' (about £2,000). He was purchased by Khadijah’s nephew, who made her a present of him. When it became clear that Muhammad and Khadijah would not have a son of their own, Muhammad took Zayd to the steps of the Ka’aba and declared before the assembled citizens that he took Zayd to be his heir.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 6-9}}.</ref> Although Muhammad kept Zayd close to him<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115; 314-315. {{Tabari|7|p. 8}}. {{Bukhari|4|53|324}}. {{Abudawud|12|2271}}. {{Muslim|8|3441}}.</ref> and conferred many small favours on him,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186; 308; 364; 660; 662; 664. {{Tabari|7|16}}. Bewley/Saad 8:72. {{Bukhari|5|59|562}}.</ref> when the two finally had a conflict of interest, Muhammad ignored Zayd’s rights and served only himself.<ref>See {{Tabari|8|pp. 1-4}}.</ref>

When a drought caused widespread hardship, Khadijah presented Muhammad’s former foster mother with 40 sheep and a camel loaded with supplies.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 27.20/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:27:20.]</ref> Muhammad volunteered to relieve his uncle Abu Talib by taking charge of one of the latter’s children. Thereafter Muhammad and Khadijah brought up Muhammad’s young cousin Ali but they did not adopt him legally.<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 83}}.</ref> Again, Muhammad always made a great show of affection towards Ali<ref>E.g., Guillaume/Ishaq 234, 286, 293, 593, 650; {{Bukhari|4|52|219}}; {{Muslim|1|141}}; {{Muslim|31|5917}}.</ref> and even gave him Fatima as his wife.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 167}}.</ref> But the apparent success of this family arrangement has to be set against the reality that Ali grew up with a remarkable lack of empathy for other human beings.<ref>E.g., Guillaume/Ishaq 496; {{Bukhari|5|59|637}}; {{Bukhari|8|82|803}}; {{Bukhari|8|81|769}}; {{Bukhari|9|84|57}}.</ref>

==Polytheism==

Modern hagiographers sometimes claim that the virtuous Khadijah, "unlike her people, never believed in nor worshipped idols." <ref>"''One particular quality in Khadija was quite interesting, probably more so than any of her other qualities mentioned above: she, unlike her people, never believed in nor worshipped idols.''" - [http://www.al-islam.org/masoom/bios/khadija.htm/ Al-Jibouri, Y. T. (1994). ''Khadija Daughter of Khuwaylid, Wife of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh).]</ref> The early sources state otherwise. Khadijah kept in her house an idol of Al-Uzza, a virgin star-goddess who was the patroness of Mecca and was supposed to be powerful in war.<ref>[http://www.pantheon.org/areas/mythology/other/articles.html/ “Al-Uzza” in ''Encyclopaedia Mythica''].</ref><ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Al-Kalbi/uzza.htm/ Al-Kalbi, ''The Book of Idols'', pp. 16-29.]</ref><ref>[http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1691&Itemid=109/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Quran 53:19–26.]</ref> The family used to worship it just before bedtime.<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 4 p. 222.</ref> Muhammad sometimes sacrificed a white sheep to the goddess,<ref>[http://answering-islam.org/Books/Al-Kalbi/uzza.htm/ Al-Kalbi, pp. 16-17.]</ref> and Khadijah sacrificed two kids at the birth of each son and one at the birth of each daughter.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 36.2/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:36:2].</ref> When Muhammad complained of the Evil Eye, Khadijah used to send for an elderly sorceress to charm it away.<ref>Yunus ibn Bakayr from Ibn Ishaq, cited in [http://books.google.com.au/books?id=tNHnAAAAIAAJ&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_vpt_buy#v=onepage&q&f=false/ Guillaume, A. (1960). ''New Light on the Life of Muhammad'', p. 7. Manchester: Manchester University Press.]</ref> In 605 a severe flood damaged the Ka’aba, and the principal citizens of Mecca cooperated to rebuild it. Muhammad played a prominent part by arbitrating a dispute over who should have the honour of reinstalling the [[Black Stone]].<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 84-86.</ref> He gave no hint at that date that he had rejected any of the 360 gods whom he thus rehoused.

However, at an unspecified date and for an unknown reason, Muhammad and Khadijah became disillusioned with their traditional religion. Muhammad and his son Zayd came under the influence of the outspoken monotheist Zayd ibn Amr al-Adiyi, who told them that he never ate meat offered to idols. Muhammad then decided that he too would never again sacrifice to Al-Uzza.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 99. See also {{Bukhari|7|67|407}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|169}}. Variant forms of this ''hadith'' are cited in [http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/content/bag-meat-study-early-%E1%B8%A5ad%C4%ABth/ Kister, M. J. (1970). “A Bag of Meat.” A Study of an Early Hadith. ''Bulletin of the School of Oriental and African Studies, 33'', 267-75.] Ibn Ishaq (Guillaume, pp. 102-103) describes how Zayd ibn Amr was eventually murdered. Although the culprit was never discovered, Ibn Ishaq apparently suspected Zayd’s half-brother, Al-Khattab ibn Nufayl, the father of Caliph Umar.</ref> Finally he confessed his unbelief to Khadijah. She replied by telling him to “Leave Al-Lat and leave Al-Uzza.”<ref>"''A neighbour of Khadijah bint Khuwaylid heard the Prophet say, “O Khadija! By Allah, I do not worship Al-Lat or Al-Uzza. By Allah, I do not worship [them] at all.” Khadijah replied, “Leave Al-Lat and leave Al-Uzza.” He [the neighbour] said this was their idol, which they all used to worship, after which they would lie down to sleep.''" - Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 4 p. 222.</ref> (Al-Lat was an earth-mother goddess who was revered in Ta’if.)<ref>[http://www.pantheon.org/articles/a/allat.html/ “Allat” in ''Encyclopaedia Mythica''.]</ref><ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Al-Kalbi/allat.htm/ Al-Kalbi, ''The Book of Idols'', pp. 14-15.]</ref> Such a placid acceptance of her husband’s apostasy suggests that Khadijah in her turn had already lost faith.

It is not stated what Muhammad and Khadijah did with their idol; nor is it known which religious group, if any, they joined next. Monotheists who lived in or travelled through Mecca included Jews, Christians, Zoroastrians and Sabians;<ref>{{Quran|2|62}}. {{Quran|5|69}}. {{Quran|22|17}}. Guillaume/Ishaq 90, 106.</ref> but Zayd ibn Amr did not identify with any of these groups. However, there is little doubt that Muhammad and Khadijah learned monotheistic ideas – Heaven, Hell, holy books, prophets – from Khadijah’s cousins Waraqa ibn Nawfal and Uthman ibn Al-Huwayrith and from Muhammad’s cousin Ubaydallah ibn Jahsh.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 99.</ref> Khadijah began to speak as if there was only one God.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 106-107.</ref>

==Islam==

[[File:Mount Hira Cave.jpg|right|thumb|This cave in Mount Hira is widely believed to be the same cave where Muhammad first encountered Jibreel. It is now a popular tourist destination for Muslim pilgrims.|200px]]

Muhammad took to meditating in caves, often leaving his family for days at a time to focus on his devotions.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 105.</ref> In August 610, when he was 39 years old, these meditations were interrupted by an experience that terrified him.<ref>It could have been an epileptic fit, a psychotic episode or an ordinary nightmare. Since he was alone, there is no way to know.</ref> He staggered home to Khadijah under the conviction that he had seen the angel Jibreel (Gabriel) and that he was demon-possessed.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 106.</ref> Khadijah wrapped him in a blanket and consoled him. She did not believe that Muhammad could be possessed. “Allah would not treat you thus since he knows your good character. So rejoice and be glad! I have hope that you will be the prophet of this community.” Then she put on her cloak and took Muhammad to consult her cousin Waraqa.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 106-107. {{Tabari|6|p. 72}}.</ref>

Waraqa was a blind old man who had converted to Christianity and had studied an Arabic translation of the Gospels.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 99; {{Muslim|1|301}}.</ref> According to Muhammad, Waraqa declared: “Holy, holy! This was the great ''Namus'' [law] that came to Moses. You are the prophet of these people. Should I live till you receive the Divine Message, I will support you strongly.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 107. {{Bukhari|1|1|3}}. {{Bukhari|4|55|605}} [http://www.searchtruth.com/book_display.php?book=55&translator=1&start=55&number=597]. {{Bukhari|9|87|111}} [http://www.searchtruth.com/book_display.php?book=87&translator=1&start=0&number=0]. {{Muslim|1|301}}.</ref> If Waraqa really said this, he did not keep his promise. Although he lived for at least another three years,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 144,</ref> people afterwards had to ask whether he had even been a Muslim,<ref name="Tir4623">"''Aisha narrated. Someone asked Allah’s Messenger about Waraqa. So Khadijah told him, “He believed in you, but died before you appeared as a prophet.” Allah’s Messenger then said, “I was shown him in a dream, wearing white clothes, and if he had been one of the inhabitants of Hell he would have been wearing different clothing.''” - [http://www.oocities.org/tirmidhihadith/page7.html/ Tirmidhi 4623.]</ref> meaning that Waraqa never made a public profession of Islam. Nobody except Muhammad and Khadijah ever heard him endorse Muhammad as a prophet. Muhammad even admitted to Aisha that he had required prompting from Khadijah before he could answer this straightforward question.<ref name="Tir4623"></ref>

It was not Waraqa whose confidence moved Muhammad to discard his terrors and believe in his own mission, but Khadijah herself.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 112.</ref> Within hours of deducing that her husband was a prophet, she secured the conversion of her next-door neighbour.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 201}}.</ref> When he next announced that Jibreel was in the room, Khadijah tested the visitor (whom she could not see) by standing in his supposed line of vision, stripping off her gown and enticing Muhammad to have sex with her. Muhammad then reported that Jibreel had departed, and Khadijah declared that Jibreel’s modesty was a certain sign that he was an angel and not a demon.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 107. {{Tabari|6|p. 73}}. The sanitised version of this story, in which Khadijah merely removes her veil, is unlikely to be the correct one, as Khadijah died long before the veil was mandated. The mere removal of a veil would not have shocked anyone at that early date – assuming that a lady sitting indoors was even wearing one.</ref>

Soon after this, Muhammad reported that Jibreel had stopped visiting him. Despite his initial terror of his strange experiences, he was now distraught by their absence.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 111.</ref> Several times he became so depressed that he considered committing suicide by throwing himself off a cliff. Although he returned home from each attempt saying that Jibreel had reappeared in time to prevent him,<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 76}}. {{Bukhari|9|87|111}}.</ref> the angel did not remain long enough to give him any new prophecies. Eventually Khadijah taunted him: “I think that your Lord must have come to hate you!”<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 70}}.</ref> This goading, the only recorded incident in which her sympathy for her husband failed, suggests a profound disappointment with the possibility that Muhammad might not be a prophet after all. It was very soon afterwards that Muhammad reported a new prophecy: “Thy Lord hath not forsaken thee, nor doth He hate thee...”<ref>{{Quran|93|3}}.</ref>

Muhammad never again mentioned being afraid of the angel. Thenceforth he reported regular visits from Jibreel, who brought new revelations from Allah.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|1|3}}. {{Bukhari|6|60|478}}. Guillaume/Ishaq 111-112.</ref> One of the earliest messages concerned the correct ritual for the five daily prayers. After this Muhammad was often to be seen in full public view, first abluting then standing face to the Ka’aba to pray, with Ali at his side and Khadijah a pace behind them.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 112-114. Bewley/Saad 8:11.</ref> Khadijah accepted from the beginning that a woman’s place in Islam was behind the men. Their four daughters and Zayd were also among the earliest converts.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 114-115, 313-314.</ref> After the conversion of Abu Bakr, of course, there was no turning back.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 114-117.</ref>

==The Persecution==

After three years and some fifty converts,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115-117.</ref> it was known throughout Mecca that Muhammad considered himself a prophet. He received little attention<ref>{{Tabari|6|p. 93}}.</ref> until the day when he gathered his relatives together for a dinner-party and invited them to forsake their idols and submit to Allah. But no mass-conversions followed;<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 117-119.</ref> the Meccans doubted, questioned and ignored him. Discouraged, Muhammad confided his troubles to Khadijah,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 191.</ref> who was quick to console him. The citizens of Mecca accused him of outright lying, and Khadijah continued to reassure him that he was a prophet.<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' volume 6 p. 117-118.</ref> Debates led to angry arguments and mockery, and Khadijah disparaged their folly. Notwithstanding this concise summary of Khadijah’s attitude, surprisingly few specifics are recorded. The exact words of her counter-mockery do not survive, and nor is it precisely described how she “helped him in his work.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 117.</ref> There are very few ''ahadith'' about her everyday life with Muhammad or her involvement in community affairs, although there must have been multiple witnesses to both.

Muhammad kept preaching, and the public arguments led to fights in the streets. It was a Muslim who struck the first blow,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 118.</ref> but when Muhammad continued his “shameless” attacks,<ref>Francis Edwards Peters, ''Muhammad and the Origins of Islam'', p. 169, SUNY Press.</ref> mocking the idols in the Ka’aba, the pagans began a systematic campaign of punishing Muslim slaves and teenagers.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 143-145.</ref> One of the worst offenders was Khadijah’s brother Nawfal, whom the Muslims called “a satan of the Quraysh.” He once tied Abu Bakr to his kinsman Talha ibn Ubaydullah and left them helplessly roped together.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 127-128.</ref> His attitude raises interesting questions about Khadijah’s relationship with her brother – especially as Nawfal’s own son was an early convert to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 147.</ref> However, while his spiteful prank no doubt caused Abu Bakr and Talha some inconvenience, if this was deemed the action of a “satan”, then the general harassment of freeborn adults was far from life-threatening. The majority of these converts fled to Abyssinia, where the Christian King extended his unqualified protection. Muhammad and Khadijah, being under the protection of Muhammad’s uncle Abu Talib, remained in Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 146ff.</ref>

More questions about Khadijah’s family arise over Abu Bakr’s purchase and manumission of seven mistreated slaves,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 144.</ref> among them Al-Nahdiya bint Habib and her (unnamed) daughter. The story is told of how Al-Nahdiya’s mistress swore never to free them, of how quickly she changed her mind when she heard Abu Bakr’s ransom-offer, and how they dutifully postponed accepting their freedom until they had finished grinding their ex-mistress’s flour.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 144.</ref> But the usual retellings of this story omit one important detail: Al-Nahdiya was Khadijah’s own grand-niece. Khadijah’s sister Ruqayqa had a daughter named Umayma bint Abdullah.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:1, 180.</ref> There was something irregular about Umayma’s married life: “she went to a foreigner” (whatever this expression means) and married a man from Ta’if. The daughter of this union was the slave Al-Nahdiya bint Habib.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:180-181. Umayma appears not to have become a Muslim until the conquest of Mecca in 630, hence she was not persecuted.</ref> What is more, Al-Nahdiya’s owner belonged to the rival Abduldar clan.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 144.</ref> It is not clear whether Umayma herself had been for some reason reduced to slavery or whether it was only her daughter, perhaps deemed in some way illegitimate, who was in bondage. Either way, Khadijah could have easily afforded to ransom her nieces if she had wanted to; since she did not, there must have been some social disgrace or personal grudge associated with Al-Nahdiya’s situation that made Khadijah unwilling to help her. For that matter, no other family member helped either. Since the exact chronology of these events is unknown, it is difficult to discern whether there was any connection between Nawfal’s trick with the rope and Abu Bakr’s ransom of Nawfal’s embarrassing nieces. Indeed, it is difficult to calculate overall how much of the harassment of Muslims was due to Islam and how much might be attributed to old quarrels from pre-Islamic times.

Muhammad warned his opponents of Hellfire, graphically describing how sinners would be “thrown headlong”<ref>{{Quran|26|94}}.</ref> into “a fierce blast of fire and boiling water, shades of black smoke,”<ref>{{Quran-range|56|42|43}}.</ref> to drink “a boiling fluid, and a fluid dark, murky, intensely cold,”<ref>{{Quran-range|38|56|64}}</ref> allowing nothing to survive and nothing to escape, “darkening and changing the colour of man.”<ref>{{Quran-range|74|26|29}}. See also {{Quran|92|14}}. {{Quran-range|89|23|26}}. {{Quran|102|6}}. {{Quran-range|85|4|6}}. {{Quran|85|10}}. {{Quran-range|101|8|11}}. {{Quran-range|90|19|20}}. {{Quran|54|48}}. {{Quran-range|7|36|41}}. {{Quran|7|50}}. {{Quran|7|179}}. {{Quran|72|15}}. {{Quran|36|63}}. {{Quran-range|25|65|69}}. {{Quran-range|35|6|7}}. {{Quran-range|35|36|37}}. {{Quran|19|86}}. {{Quran|20|74}}. {{Quran-range|56|93|94}}. {{Quran-range|28|41|42}}.</ref> Khadijah had to take her share of the warning. When she asked about her children who had died in the days of ignorance, Muhammad replied, “They are in Hellfire. If you saw them, you would hate them.” When she asked about the child that she bore to him, he replied, “He is in Paradise... Verily, the believers and their children will be in Paradise, and the polytheists and their children in the Hellfire.”<ref>"''Khadijah asked Allah’s Apostle about her children who had died in the days of ignorance. Thereupon Allah’s Messenger said: “They are in Hellfire.” When he saw the sign of disgust on her face, he said: “If you were to see their station, you would hate them.” She said: “Allah’s Messenger, what about the child that I bore to you?” He said: “He is in Paradise.” Then Allah’s Messenger said: “Verily, the believers and their children will be in Paradise, and the polytheists and their children in the Hellfire.''” [http://www.oocities.org/tirmidhihadith/page1.html/ Tirmidhi 117.]</ref> Muhammad’s conclusion is interesting in the light of the fact that ''all'' the children in question had died before Islam. He did not explain why Khadijah’s subsequent conversion was retrospectively effective to save some of her children but not all of them.

After the conversions of two famously violent citizens, Hamza ibn Abdulmuttalib<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 131-132.</ref> and Umar ibn Al-Khattab,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 155-159.</ref> the ruling clans of Mecca declared a boycott. This boycott was against Muhammad’s entire clan, including its non-Muslims. Thenceforth no Meccan might trade, socialise or intermarry with the Hashimites.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 159-160.</ref> The clan inferred that they had been condemned to outlaw status and would not be protected against theft or violence. Fearing worse hostility to follow, in September 616 Abu Talib evacuated the Hashimites from Mecca proper. They camped out in a mountain gorge “formed by one of the defiles, or indentations of the mountain, where the projecting rocks of [Mount] Abu Cobeis pressed upon the eastern outskirts of Mecca. It was entered on the city side by a low gateway, through which a camel passed with difficulty. On all other sides it was detached from the town by cliffs and buildings.”<ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap5.htm/ Muir (1861) vol. 2 pp. 176-178.]</ref> Such a narrow entrance could be constantly guarded, leaving the Hashimites safe but effectively trapped.

“The Quraysh blocked food-grain and other necessaries.”<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 53.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:53:1].</ref> For supplies the Hashimites had to depend on smuggler-friends who were willing and able to bypass the Meccans.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 160.</ref> For example, Hisham ibn Amr “used to bring a camel laden with food by night, and then when he had got it to the mouth of the alley, he took off its halter, gave it a whack on the side, and sent it into the alley to them. He would do the same thing another time, bringing clothes for them.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 118.</ref> As the Hashimites had no way of earning money to pay for this food, they had to expend their savings. Over the next three years, Khadijah exhausted all her wealth to support the community.<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118.</ref> The severity of the blockade continued to grow more intense and the Hashimites remained in the mountain pass for three years.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 53.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:53:1].</ref>

==Co-Wives==

Muslims often speak with pride of how Muhammad was faithful to Khadijah. They comment on how it was the "prime time of his youth and constitutes two-thirds of his marriage life,"<ref>"''His first marriage was with Khadija. He lived with her alone for twenty-five years. It was the prime time of his youth and constitutes two-thirds of his marriage [''sic''] life.''" - Al-Jibouri, Y. T. (1994). “[http://www.al-islam.org/muhammad-yasin-jibouri/8.htm/ Marriages of the Prophet]” in ''Muhammad: The Prophet and Messenger of Allah. Qum, Iran: Ansariyan Publications.</ref> and that it "should be noted by those who criticise him for his polygamy in later years."<ref>"''The Prophet did not marry another woman during his first marriage with Khadija, is a fact that should be noted by those who criticise him for his polygamy in later years.''" - [http://www.bzu.edu.pk/PJIR/eng%201%20Hafiz%20M.pdf/ Saleem (2012)]</ref>

In one sense this is true. For example, when the Quraysh chiefs wanted to end the boycott, they offered Muhammad “as many wives as he wanted in marriage,” together with wealth, political power and a competent exorcist, if only he would stop reviling their gods. Muhammad scorned this bribe.<ref>{{Tabari|6|pp. 106-107}}. See also Guillaume/Ishaq 132-133.</ref> In this case, however, his loyalty to Khadijah can scarcely be disentangled from his loyalty to his own prophetic office. He responded to Khadijah’s support with a nepotistic revelation that the Virgin Mary had been the best woman of her generation while Khadijah was the best woman of the present generation.<ref>[http://www.searchtruth.com/book_display.php?book=55&translator=1&start=91&number=633/ Bukhari|4|55|642]. {{Bukhari|5|58|163}}. {{Muslim|31|5965}}.</ref> He claimed that although there were many perfect men, there had only ever been only three perfect women: Asiya “wife of Pharaoh,” who had rescued the infant Moses; Mary the virgin mother of the Prophet Jesus; and Khadijah. He later allowed that their daughter Fatima was also one of the four “best among the women of Paradise.”<ref>[http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1298&Itemid=122/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''] on {{Quran|66|11}}. See also {{Muslim|31|5966}}. He never called any of his other wives or daughters “perfect”, not even his fourth divine spouse, Kulthum the sister of Moses.</ref> How his three elder daughters reacted to such open favouritism is not recorded. When Khadijah once brought Muhammad a bowl of soup, she was granted a personal message from Jibreel (of which Aisha was later intensely jealous): “Give her Allah’s greeting and the good news that in Paradise she will have a palace built of a hollow pearl, where there will be no noise or fatigue.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 111. Ibn Hisham note 148. {{Bukhari|3|27|19}}. {{Bukhari|5|58|167}}. {{Bukhari|5|58|168}}. {{Bukhari|9|93|588}}. {{Muslim|31|5967}}. {{Muslim|31|5968}}. {{Muslim|31|5970}}.</ref>

Yet despite this outward loyalty to Khadijah, it was exactly at this period when Muhammad frankly admitted that he was thinking about other women. It was only after 614 that he introduced to his descriptions of Paradise the “modest ''houris''” (virgins) with “lustrous eyes” and “swelling breasts” who reclined “like pearls or rubies” on “green cushions”.<ref>{{Quran|38|52}}. {{Quran-range|56|22|23}}. {{Quran-range|37|48|49}}. {{Quran|44|54}}. {{Quran|52|20}}. {{Quran|78|33}}.</ref> According to Muir, all of the Qur’anic descriptions of ''houris'' date to the last few years of Khadijah’s life; after Muhammad moved to Medina, remarried to a younger woman, there were only two brief and tame references<ref>{{Quran|2|25}}. {{Quran|4|57}}.</ref> to “companions pure”.<ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap4.htm/ Muir (1861) 2:141-144]. See also [http://www.muhammadanism.org/Canon_Sell/Quran/p024.htm/ Sell, E. (1923). ''The Historical Development of the Qur'an'', 4th Ed, pp. 25-26. London: People International.]</ref> Muir might have miscalculated, as the most detailed reference to the divine virgins<ref>{{Quran-range|55|56|58}} {{Quran-range|55|70|76}}.</ref> is sometimes dated to the Medina period,<ref>[http://www.wikiislam.net/wiki/Chronological_Order_of_the_Qur'an]</ref> although the German historian Nöldeke assigned even this one to Khadijah’s lifetime.<ref>[http://www.truthnet.org/islam/Watt/Chapter7.html/ Bell, R. (1953). Introduction to the Qur’an. Revised by Montgomery Watt (1970). Chapter 7: “The Chronology of the Qur’an.” Edinburgh University Press.]</ref> Regardless of the exact date when Muhammad eventually shifted his focus, it is certain that the ageing Khadijah knew about the ''houris''.

The boycott against the Hashim clan was lifted “in the tenth year” (between August 619 and August 620), and Muhammad’s clan returned to their houses in Mecca.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 53.3/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:53:3].</ref> By this time, Khadijah was dying.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:12.</ref> Muhammad comforted her in her final illness with the reminder that she was going to her jewelled palace in Paradise – so she must convey his best wishes to her co-wives. When Khadijah expressed surprise at the news that Muhammad already had deceased wives, he explained that Allah had wedded him in Paradise to Queen Asiya, to “Kulthum the sister of Moses” and to the Virgin Mary. The theme of having four wives appears to have been on his mind even in his last moments with Khadijah. She responded with the conventional congratulation to a newlywed: “May the union be blessed.”<ref>[http://www.al-islam.org/hayat-al-qulub-vol2-allamah-muhammad-baqir-al-majlisi/ Majlisi, ''Hayat al-Qulub'' 2:26.] Muhammad’s invention of the character “Kulthum” appears to be the aftermath of his embarrassing discovery that the sister of Moses was not identical with the Virgin Mary. (See {{Quran-range|19|27|28}}; {{Muslim|25|5326}}.) He must have over-corrected his error by deducing that Moses’ sister was not even named Maryam.</ref>

==Death==

Khadijah died on 10 Ramadan “in the tenth year of prophethood, three years before the ''Hijra'',” i.e., on 22 April 620, and was buried in Mount Hajun Cemetery near Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 191. {{Tabari|39|pp. 4, 161}}. Bewley/Saad 8:152. Yet another disputed fact about Khadijah’s life is the date of her death. Ibn Saad (Bewley 8:12) also cites 20 Ramadan (2 May) of the tenth year. [https://docs.google.com/viewer?url=http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/sites/default/files/khadija.pdf&embedded=true/ Kister (1993)] summarises several traditions that cite variant years: one, two, four, five or six years before the ''Hijra''. Assuming that Ibn Ishaq, Ibn Saad and Tabari are correct to prefer “three years before the ''Hijra''”, this suggests a miscalculation on the part of those modern biographers who state that Khadijah died in 619.</ref>

“The Messenger of Allah was so grieved about Khadijah that people feared for him.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> For the rest of his life, he spoke warmly and often of her<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|164}}. {{Bukhari|5|58|165}}. {{Bukhari|5|58|166}}. {{Bukhari|7|62|156}}. {{Bukhari|8|73|33}}. {{Muslim|31|5971}}. {{Muslim|31|5974}}.</ref> and sometimes seemed overwhelmed by sorrow at her absence.<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|168}}</ref> He used to say: “Khadijah believed in me when they doubted me; she financed me when they tried to starve me out; and she is the mother of my children. Allah himself nurtured love for her in my heart.”<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118. {{Muslim|31|5972}}.</ref>

Islam changed direction after Khadijah’s death. Within seven weeks Muhammad had become a bigamist.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 170, 171}}. Bewley/Saad 8:39, 43, 152.</ref> At the same time he began negotiations for military alliances with foreign tribes,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 192-195, 197-199.</ref> although it was to be another two years before he succeeded in declaring war on Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 201-213, 324.</ref> Even the sections of the Qur’an that were composed at the end of Muhammad’s Meccan period, though narrative rather than legislative, read more like the flat prose of Medina than the poetry of Khadijah’s lifetime.<ref>[http://www.muhammadanism.org/Canon_Sell/Quran/p074.htm/ Sell (1923), p. 74.] [http://www.truthnet.org/islam/Watt/Chapter7.html/ “The Chronology of the Qur’an.” In Bell, R. (1970). ''Introduction to the Quran.'' Revised by Montgomery Watt. Edinburgh University Press.]</ref> It is frequently said that “Islam arose by Ali’s sword and Khadijah’s wealth.”<ref>E.g., [http://www.al-islam.org/masoom/bios/khadija.htm/ Al-Jibouri, Y. T. (1994). Khadija Daughter of Khuwaylid Wife of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh)].</ref> It is clear that what Khadijah contributed to the foundations of Islam was far more than money. It is doubtful that she intended or foresaw the enthusiasm with which later Muslims would resort to the sword.

{{Core Women}}
==See Also==

*[[Muhammad's Wives]]'' - A hub page that leads to other articles related to Muhammad's wives and concubines''

==External Links==

*[{{Reference archive|1=http://www.faithfreedom.org/forum/viewtopic.php?t=47335|2=2012-08-22}} How do you explain Khadija?]

==References==
{{Reflist|30em}}

[[Category:Muhammad]] [[Category:Islam and Women]][[Category:Muslims]]

User talk:1234567

2013-07-18T07:25:24Z

1234567: /* Article comments */

==Links==
[[User talk:1234567/Archive]]

[[User:1234567|Sandbox]]

==Simon Ockley again==

My Arab friends have given me some help about Simon Ockley's translation of the paedophilia text.
Simon Ockley was translating this text. https://play.google.com/books/reader?id=xLJEAAAAcAAJ&printsec=frontcover&output=reader&authuser=0&hl=en. You can scroll forward to page 23, where you will recognise the words Mohamet, Abu Bakr, Aisha. There is no serious doubt that Ockley has made an accurate translation of Maracci's Latin.
You will see that the Arab scholar was called Abdulrahman al-Hamdani.
My friends say that the title of his book is ''Al-Shabayat''.
They cannot read Latin and I did not tell them what it was about. I just asked them about the sentence of Arabic. They said it means: "He reached out his blessed arm and grabbed her by the clothes."
They were very surprised by this odd sentence. I had to explain to them that it was probably a quote from the book, and the story was about Muhammad and Aisha.
So I think we can fairly say that Maracci did have access to a real book and that he made a fair translation of the story.
Now we must try to find out who the scholar was and when he lived. Perhaps then we can establish the reliability of his narrative.
But there is something about it that rings horribly true. I don't think a Muslim hagiographer would have invented this story.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 05:01, 13 April 2013 (PDT)
:Interesting! Thanks for keeping us posted. [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 11:10, 13 April 2013 (PDT)

==Aisha==

hi 1234567, I'm resetting the indent for my convenience.

I had given you the wrong links for your Sandboxes. I made the right links on your user page now: [[User:1234567]]. What you were working on is Sandbox 1: [[User:1234567/Sandbox 1]]

I feel you enjoy researching and writing about these topics and that's what we want in our editors. Your recent writeup is full of facts as is usually the case and but we have two concerns again with your writing which must be addressed before you do any additional work. The first is serious and needs to be discussed.

Wikipedia has this as a core policy: [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Verifiability Verifiability]. I'm going to repeat the "nutshell" of their policy page:
:'''''Readers must be able to check that Wikipedia articles are not just made up. This means that all quotations and <u>any material challenged or likely to be challenged must be attributed</u> to a reliable, published source using an inline citation.'''''

For example in your [[User:1234567/Sandbox 1| recent writeup]]:

:''Muhammad told the household of Abu Bakr, without mentioning his reason, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position.” A few days later, Aisha became upset with her mother and complained to her father. Abu Bakr was angry with both of them, and Umm Ruman '''vented''' her annoyance on Aisha. Aisha hid behind the front door to '''sob''' and was in this state of distress when Muhammad, arriving for his daily visit, asked what was wrong. She '''blurted''' out everything''

I bolded three words here (''vented, sob, blurted''). The tone of these words is dramatic/emotional and not suitable for this site. We like writing articles in a style which would be found in a research paper. I want you to understand why we want to write things in a serious/journalistic style. Even though it may read boring it looks better and is more reliable/factual.

Here's the problem. A visitor comes on this site and reads ''"Abu Bakr was angry and Umm Ruman vented"''. He's going to ask "Who is the author who made this claim? '''How do I know this is true?'''". Unless an editor is Bukhari himself, they cannot make such a claim. So we only ''report'' what we find in a verifiable manner. We cannot give the impression of any original research (our own conclusions). We are all anonymous people on the internet so we cannot attempt to tell the reader what we ''think'' (no one cares about that and no wants to know). We can only tell people what we know for sure. This is like you reading a news article about the history of Aisha. You would want to know the facts and the facts only.

This is crucial to understand. Here's another example from the new writeup:
:She was slim and light-framed[31] with a fair, rosy complexion and perhaps also red hair[32] that she wore plaited.[33] '''Time would show that she was confident, spirited, strong-willed and highly intelligent''' – she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah”.

The bolded line would not be acceptable. Its giving the impression of assumptions again. I remember I had brought something like this up before as well ([[User_talk:1234567/Archive#Questions_about_the_Wives_articles|link]]) and I'm a little sad that I'm having to address this again. You have access to great sources and you have a strong interest in these topics and I want your work to be produced in the best way possible. If people see statements like these, this will severely negate all the positives (the references and facts). Mixing facts with opinions also makes it hard for the reader to distinguish between the two. (1) What actually happened. (2) What the author thinks may have happened. Even if what you wrote may be true, we cannot give the impression that the author is making the claim.

Leave out anything that you cannot directly attribute to a source. Make everything easily verifiable. That does mean leaving out speculations. If you have any speculation that is about something very important (Khadija living 15 more years), you can say it like "One may conclude that ...". Here its clear that this is an opinion of the author.

The second concern is making multiple references. Please do not combine references into a single reference. It makes it harder for anyone to verify the information.

To make things easy for you for both these issues, you can just mention the most important parts of a story so you'll have to use less references and do less work. I know you want people to know as much as possible so thats your choice, but in any case we need all opinions to left out, everything to be easily verifiable and no combined references should be used. If there is something that you think might be challenged by Muslims, it is also good to write the relevant part of that quote in the references with italics/quotation marks or provide the entire quote (whatever you think is appropriate). For example <nowiki><ref>''"... Abu Bakar was very upset with Muhammad ..."'' (Bukhari 123:123)</ref></nowiki> Even in essays these two issues must not be present.

One problem is that we don't have time to continuously review and fix the content, so this must change going forward and we need you to understand our approach so any additional work is done according to the guidelines. If these things are not fixed/changed at this time when the material is being compiled, it will be almost impossible to fix it later when there's limited access to the sources.

I think you will understand if you imagine that you are writing a research paper with a serious tone where everything must be referenced. This is actually very simple to do: As you go along, ''only report'' what you see (in a chronological order when possible), reference everything and don't create any opinions or give the impression that an opinion has been created. This is all you need to do.

As for whether you should do the controversial articles first or go in chrono-order, that's up to you how you want to do that. If we had a preference, of course we would like the controversial content first.

Sahabah may have additional thoughts. Let me know if you see any problems or difficulties with what I'm suggesting. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 18:21, 29 April 2013 (PDT)

:I don't have much to add except maybe clarify a few of Axius' points, or at least what I think he meant (Axius will no doubt correct me if I'm wrong).

: About Axius' point concerning assumptions; in essence we're an encyclopedic counter-apologetics site, so things like this are ''great'' (minus the use of the word "absurd"):

{{Quote||It is also suggested that Muhammad “married Aisha for the benefit of Islam and Humanity … From her, 2210 Hadith have come... Many of her transmissions pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behaviour which only someone in Aisha's position could have learnt.”[24] This is absurd. If Muhammad had wanted the traditions about his life to be securely transmitted to posterity, he would not have relied on the hope that his young widow might later think of it; he would have arranged to have them committed to writing during his lifetime. He never did. Further, if he had believed that a wife was the best kind of chronicler, he would have chosen an adult spouse who knew how to write. Aisha could in fact read[25] but she never learned to write.[26]}}

: However, this is not:

{{Quote||Time would show that she was confident, spirited, strong-willed and highly intelligent – she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah”.}}

: And, yes, the use of dramatic/emotional language detracts a lot of the page's impact and makes it harder for an anonymous reader to take seriously. So basically, it shouldn't read like a novel. I know 1234567 is concerned about holding peoples interest, but the 'dry' or 'boring' articles really are what readers are looking for and is certainly what we want. Of course, when I say 'dry' or 'boring', I mean a to-the-point article written in a scholarly, professional tone. I know we must seem like crazy control freaks, and I apologize for that. But people will use any little excuse they can find to dismiss work critical of Islam. Your articles really are great and it would be a shame for them to be dismissed over such easily rectified points. [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 19:40, 29 April 2013 (PDT)

::Okay, what you need to understand is that the article is currently in a very rough state, based on old work that was intended for a more narrative style. I have had to break off my research to earn money for a few days. So I have a skeleton article (information in roughly the right order) but also a lot of references not properly tied to the article and a lot of statements not properly tied to references. You can see this from the number of empty reference boxes. Many of the statements reflect the sort of information that, based on my preliminary reading of the sources, I expect to find, but there just hasn't been time for a sentence-by-sentence breakdown of how I know what I know. Isn't that what sandboxes are for?
::And, yes, I do sometimes find that when I do the breakdown, I have drawn an unwarranted conclusion. It turns out to be based on something I read in a secondary source that wasn't properly linked to a real primary source; or when events are laid out in strict chronological order, it turns out that there is a confusion (mine or someone else's) of cause and effect; or the same minor character has been running through several narratives and reveals himself as a much more major player than anyone realised.

::In the case of the story of Muhammad interfering with Abu Bakr's family, what will be needed will be to tie it more closely to the language of the original hadith, which (in my translation) is: "He found Aisha '''hiding''' behind the door of the house of Abu Bakr, '''weeping''' with great '''distress'''. He questioned her and she '''complained''' about her mother and said that '''she was after her'''." So perhaps she didn't "blurt" but only "told" her complaint; but it was definitely not in neutral tone. The annoying lack of specific detail (what actually ''happened'' in this situation?) is a feature of the original, which may be why this story is often omitted from the standard biographies of Aisha. I think it is interesting, however, to examine her relationship with the parents who soon afterwards handed her over to the paedophile.
::Regarding the description of Aisha as intelligent, high-spirited, etc., this is rather similar to the description of Khadija as "loyal and sympathetic", which I wrote in the middle of my Khadija article. The evidence for these qualities not apparent at this point in the narrative, but it becomes obvious by the end of the story. Now you might want all such descriptors removed or left to a final conclusion, which is fine if that is your policy. But that does leave the reader wondering: What did Jibreel/Muhammad/Khawla mean by claiming that Aisha had "some of the qualities of Khadija"? Intelligence is the one obvious thing that the two had in common, but there were no IQ tests in those days. This seems to be the wrong point to reference every single hadith suggesting that Aisha had a high IQ.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]])

:::Yes, of course that is what sandboxes are for. I'm sure Axius is aware that its content may not reflect what the finished page will look like, but was hoping his early intervention would help you avoid any unnecessary extra work later on. If one editor notices the work of another editor and thinks they're going in the wrong direction, it's only natural to point it out. If their input is not necessary because you already plan on doing what they suggested, then there is no harm.

:::About that family incident. I agree it's interesting. But the point about dramatic/emotional language would still stand. For example, replacing the word "weeping" with "crying" (if the source is quoted in the reference, readers will easily be able to read the original wording by hovering their cursor over the ref number). Or you could simply quote the source by saying, "she was "weeping with great distress"". I understand that Aisha telling Muhammad was not done in a neutral tone, and that your description of events should be accurate. But I think this should be done using the least dramatic language possible, and where there is such language used, it should be within quotation marks and never from the actual author/article.

:::Regarding the description of Aisha. I haven't read the entire article, but just considering that section on its own, I don't think it's necessary to even have that line there. One way that could have been handled without losing any information is by adding a footnote, e.g., "He said the angel Jibril had appeared to him in a dream, holding a veiled child and saying, “Messenger of Allah, this one will remove some of your sorrow. This one has some of the qualities of Khadijah.”<nowiki><ref>Note that Islamic sources generally convey that Khadijah was a confident, enthusiastic, determined and intelligent women.</ref></nowiki> Then he lifted the veil, revealing that the child was Aisha." [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 22:24, 29 April 2013 (PDT)
::::hi 1234567, right, we didnt know the writeup was based on content written earlier. No problem, we'll wait for you to be done.
::::Sahabah is right about the intelligence issue. I'll assume temporarily I'm a critical reader. I would ask questions like: ''"What is the evidence for her being confident, strong-willed and intelligent? How do these qualities compare to those found in other women of that time? Was she exceptional in any way? Did anyone attest to these qualities explicitly? Were there any additional qualities? Maybe it was something else that was being referred to, such as praying habits, seeking the approval of Muhammad and so on"''. etc. You'll realize you're better off leaving these conclusions out.
::::You want to write a complete story but I'm saying having an accurate and reliable story is of primary importance while a secondary issue is of the story being/appearing incomplete. Islamic sources mention only bits and pieces and if we report just those, we've done our job. Its not even necessary to write in conclusions/deductions and fill in any gaps. The facts are powerful enough on their own. So we're looking for statements like these: ''Aisha could in fact read[25] but she never learned to write.[26]''. They are directly referenced facts and have their own references (not combined). Here's a useful policy ([http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:No_original_research Wikipedia:No original research]), another of their core policies and I'll only mention the 'nutshell':
:::::''Wikipedia does not publish original thought: all material in Wikipedia must be attributable to a reliable, published source. Articles '''may not contain any new analysis or synthesis''' of published material that serves to advance a position '''not clearly advanced by the sources themselves'''.''
::::He's also right about the 'weeping' issue. For example when newspapers report what people are saying, they use exact quotes. Usage of the actual words is better than using your own words even if you think the new words describe it better.
::::I feel I've not done a complete job of explaining but hopefully this should help. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 09:39, 30 April 2013 (PDT)
hi 1234567, welcome back. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 04:02, 17 May 2013 (PDT)

== Article comments ==

hi 1234567, I have some comments for [[User:1234567/Sandbox 1]] and [[User:1234567/Sandbox 2]]. I'm assuming they're more or less complete. I didnt want you to be doing any more work on them but I thought I should ask first to see if you're done. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 17:35, 20 June 2013 (PDT)

:Sandbox 1 I still want to check some references.
:Sandbox 2 is more or less complete but doesn't stand on its own.
:There are so many references that the software will not support them as a single article.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 19:26, 20 June 2013 (PDT)
::Ok. Let me know when you're done and I'll compile my thoughts about the things I had noticed. Its ok to have them divided right now. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 20:37, 20 June 2013 (PDT)
:::The biggest problem is still Ockley/Maracci. We're going to look really, really stupid if we include it and it turns out to be some sixteenth-century fantasy. On the other hand, if it's genuine, I'd still like to include it in the article. I can't find any trace online of an Abdulrahman al-Hamdani or an Abdulrahman ibn Hamdan who wrote the appropriate book. That doesn't mean he doesn't exist; it more likely means that he's out of favour with modern scholars and was never cited by anyone who wrote in English.
:::My Arab friends are searching for him in Arabic. They have come on board with helping me and are saying that it's "really important to tell everyone the truth about Muhammad." But I don't want to harass them. They have busy lives and they don't have a background in history; I have to give them clues about where to look.
:::Meanwhile, a few other things need tidying, but I can afford to cut them out if I can't find the information easily.
::::Ok. I think if you cant find the sources right now easily, it will be fine if you can leave those things out and put them in a "to do" list to deal with when you do find the sources. I'll wait for you to be done and then talk about the things that are of concern (in Sandbox 1 and 2) --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 06:16, 22 June 2013 (PDT)
:::::I think I have now referenced everything that I can reference and cut out everything (minus Maracci) that I cannot; and I have toned down the writing style to something more encyclopaedic. Perhaps it's now at the stage where it's easier for you to look at it before I do any more.
:::::I will keep Maracci on my "to do" list, because I do have confidence that we will solve the puzzle one way or another eventually.
:::::If there is something that you just want to cut out, it's probably easiest if you simply cut it. I have kept a copy of the article the way I want it for my own writing, so it doesn't bother me to lose anything from the Wikiislam version.
:::::If the facts are in dispute, you can ask about it. If I've made an unwarranted assumption, I'll cut it. If you need a fuller version of the reference I used to prove my point, I can provide it. But I'm actually worried about cut-and-pasting great slabs of translated material: we'll soon be verging on breach of copyright.
:::::If you just want to change a word here or there, it's probably easier for you to do it yourself than enter a great debate about it. This is a wiki, so nobody can claim sole authorship. But if you want me to rewrite a whole paragraph, it's probably easier if you explain what you want so that I can do it myself.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 04:50, 23 June 2013 (PDT)
::::::Ok. I'll compile the comments and let you know here and we'll see what to do next. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 07:10, 23 June 2013 (PDT)

(outdent) hi 1234567, here are some comments. I'll just mention a few first so we can sort those first before moving to other issues.

1. I know you're dealing with a challenge of creating a story from old/archaic english or incomplete stories (missing information) but we cannot change things in quotes. Here's an example. If a source quoted John saying "The apple is red and falling". I cannot re-write that and change that quote in any way. People expect quotes to be accurate and exact (this is why they're called quotations). So I could not re-write that and quote John saying "The apple is red as blood and its falling while succumbing to gravity".

Quoting the following from the start of [[User:1234567/Sandbox_2]]:
:Co-Wives
:Aisha was jealous of the deceased Khadijah. She complained to Muhammad: “Khadijah is always on your mind, and you speak as if she were the only woman in the world! Why do you still think of that toothless old woman who is long dead, when Allah has given you someone better to replace her?” Muhammad retorted, “No, I have never had a better wife than Khadijah!”[1] Perhaps Aisha would not have minded about Khadijah if she had not also had to compete with living co-wives.
The sources mentioned are:
: Sahih Bukhari 5:58:164; Sahih Bukhari 5:58:165; Sahih Bukhari 5:58:166; Sahih Bukhari 5:58:168; Sahih Bukhari 7:62:156; Sahih Bukhari 8:73:33; Sahih Bukhari 9:93:576; Sahih Muslim 31:5971; Sahih Muslim 31:5972; Sahih Muslim 31:5974; Sahih Muslim 31:5976.
The two sources that may be talking about this are:
:Narrated 'Aisha: Once Hala bint Khuwailid, Khadija's sister, asked the permission of the Prophet to enter. On that, the Prophet remembered the way Khadija used to ask permission, and that upset him. He said, "O Allah! Hala!" So I became jealous and said, '''"What makes you remember an old woman amongst the old women of Quraish an old woman (with a teethless mouth) of red gums who died long ago, and in whose place Allah has given you somebody better than her?"''' ([http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/hadith/bukhari/058-sbt.php#005.058.168])

and:
:A'isha reported that Hala b. Khuwailid (sister of Khadija) sought permission from Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) to see him and he was reminded of Khadija's (manner of) asking leave to enter and (was overwhelmed) with emotions thereby and said: O Allah, it is Hala, daughter of Khuwailid, and I felt jealous and said: '''Why do you remember one of those old women of the Quraish with gums red and who is long dead-while Allah has given you a better one in her stead?''' ([http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/hadith/muslim/031-smt.php#031.5976])

The quote you that had does not match with the sources. So Aisha did not say anything like this to Muhammad: "Why do you still think of that toothless old woman who is long dead". No source has Aisha saying exactly that sentence. We cant change quotes. Brackets are sometimes used in Islamic sources but they are actually often insertions by translators (e.g. how some translators add the word 'lightly' while translating {{Quran|4|34}}). This is why the other source did not have those brackets.

The better way to do this would be to quote the source as it is:
: "Why do you remember one of those old women of the Quraish with gums red and who is long dead-while Allah has given you a better one in her stead?" (this sentence is used in the source)

As I said I understand your challenge of using these sources to create something readable but quotes cant be changed.

So that whole quote of Aisha is a synthesis. It is not what she said. Its a re-write and since its in quotes, the reader thinks this is exactly what she said in Arabic but thats not the case.

Continuing: According to Islamic sources, Muhammad's response to that quote was:
:I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadija though I did not see her, but the Prophet used to mention her very often, and when ever he slaughtered a sheep, he would cut its parts and send them to the women friends of Khadija. When I sometimes said to him, "(You treat Khadija in such a way) as if there is no woman on earth except Khadija," he would say, "Khadija was such-and-such, and from her I had children." ([http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/hadith/bukhari/058-sbt.php#005.058.166])

But according to you, his response was:
:Muhammad retorted, “No, I have never had a better wife than Khadijah!”[1] Perhaps Aisha would not have minded about Khadijah if she had not also had to compete with living co-wives.

That quote ("I have never had a better wife than Khadijah") is not present in any of the sources.

I have not heard of anyone saying its ok to re-write quotes this is why me and Sahabah were surprised when we saw this. For a website like ours where everything is scrutinized with a microscope, we cannot do anything like that. So as it is, this changing of quotes is not acceptable for our site. I know you havent done this intentionally. You really wanted to write something that the reader finds interesting, but to maintain integrity, accuracy and quality we have to be careful in how or what we write. If it was a short story we were writing or a script for a movie about Islam, it would be another issue.

This is just one issue and its very worrying because of the quantity of work you have done. Here's another example. You wrote:
:At one stage he announced a revelation from Allah that he must not marry any more women “no matter how beautiful.”[3]
This exact quote is not found in the Quran and the link you used was [http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/quran/verses/033-qmt.php#033.052]. The Quran cannot be paraphrased.

So its this re-writing, re-arranging, paraphrasing original quotes that is worrying.

Another example:
:But the revelation is of no great importance, for “Allah lifted the restriction stated in this ayah and permitted him to marry more women … Aisha said, ‘Allah’s Messenger did not die until all women were permitted to him.’”[4]

The reference given actually says:
:Then Allah lifted the restriction stated in this Ayah and permitted him to marry more women, but he did not marry anyone else, so that the favor of the Messenger of Allah towards them would be clear. Imam Ahmad recorded that `A'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said: "The Messenger of Allah did not die until Allah permitted (marriage to other) women for him.''

So you have changed the quote. "All women" is not the same as "other women".

I want to try our best to save your content. As I've said before many times there's a lot of good information you have gathered from these sources and this kind of work has possibly not been done by anyone. You have showed a lot of passion and interest in this topic and we love that. But these issues need to be addressed before content like this is acceptable for the site.

2. Minor issue (#1 above is the real problem): Image of stoning is not appropriate here: [[User:1234567/Sandbox_2]] and will need to be removed. This was something we'd talked about before. (for one, caption doesn't mention Aisha and its relation to the page. It does make the page appealing and I understand your attempt but we use images only if directly relevant)

For #1, I feel its a serious problem. There are many other instances where we saw this happening and some of them we cant even check because we don't have the sources and we haven't looked at everything because of the quantity of the content. I'm honestly not sure what can be done other than going back to the sources and making sure its all OK. What is also sad that we had talked about this before ([http://wikiislam.net/wiki/User_talk:1234567/Archive] where I said how we must only quote the sources e.g. "assumptions, deductions, opinions, things that are not present directly in a text", "we make sure the reader knows that this was an actual quote") and now the same problems exist and we have new content that is not right.

The only solution is go through the content and make sure quotes are exact and if they are not, they have to be carefully/neutrally worded. For example we would write "Muhammad replied" instead of "Muhammad retorted" (another issue that we had talked about before on the old talk page: [[User_talk:1234567/Archive]]). But again I feel this solution is difficult because of the amount of content and the common occurrence of the problem. Sahabah saw these problems and I agreed with him (that we cannot change quotes in any way. Again see my example of John in the beginning). Let me know what you think. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 18:52, 26 June 2013 (PDT)
:Let us also know if you have any feedback or suggestions for the site, if anything can be improved and so on. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 19:10, 3 July 2013 (PDT)
::Okay, if that is the main issue, that is what I will do.
::Thanks for explaining site policy. The truth is, we are dealing with translated material. I know quite a lot about translation (because I speak three languages, though not Arabic) and I find that for most purposes, a dynamic equivalent is better than a literal translation. Literal translation, especially of idioms, often obscures the real meaning. For example, the "woman of red gums" is a "toothless woman", i.e., an old one. We just don't express the idea that way in natural English. An Arab would not understand our equivalent expression, "She's over the hill." In fact there are many English translations of the hadiths, not all of which are literal and hardly any of which are expressed in elegant English; but some are definitely more comprehensible than others. (This is quite aside from whether the translation attempt was an honest one, e.g., Yusuf Ali on Q4:34). To be scrupulously honest, we should in fact name the translation as well as the source, and this information is not always available.
::But if you would rather keep it literal, I can copy out the exact translation word for word in each case.
::"I never had a better wife than Khadijah" is definitely in one of the sources; I did not invent it, and I'm fairly sure it was not invented by a secondary historian either. I'm sorry if I missed it in the versions I quoted; I'll hunt it out.
::I have cleared the decks from other commitments, so I can now spend a couple of days tidying up the citations in the Aisha article. The article about Zaynab bint Jahsh is also nearly finished.
::And I have stumbled across a few new hadiths that I can use to correct my previous articles. Amazing what you find when you're looking for something else.
::I don't have a specific suggestion for improving the site overall, but whenever I find anything that might interest you, I'll post it on the appropriate Talk page.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 22:05, 13 July 2013 (PDT)

:::'''"The truth is, we are dealing with translated material. I know quite a lot about translation (because I speak three languages, though not Arabic) and I find that for most purposes, a dynamic equivalent is better than a literal translation."'''
:::Surely you're aware that paraphrasing sources and presenting them as direct quotes from translations (by the use of inverted commas) is wrong? It's simply not the done thing.

:::Sites critical of Islam mainly have 3 accusations hurled at them: 1) they're biased. 2) they're run by bigoted right-wingers with an axe to grind. 3) their criticism is built on fabricated sources and taking things out of context.

:::The first two don't bother us because they're ad hominem (plus, we don't do politics, so the second incorrect accusation isn't even worth entertaining). However, the third accusation is something we take very seriously. We've managed to avoid such accusations by being very stringent with what we allow onto the site.

:::Speak to anyone with experience in debating Muslims or writing articles critiquing Islam and they will tell you that paraphrasing sources will lead to the accusation of fabricating sources. And to be honest, there wouldn't be a defense for it. More worryingly, you seem to go further than simply paraphrasing the text.

:::You appear to be merging several hadith into one, and the conclusions you reach from your reinterpretation of sources are at times not supported by the sources. You did agree to quote the relevant text for all sources in reference tags, but have failed to do so. We do this to make it easier for readers to check sources onsite (rather than have to go offsite via an external link or have to buy hard copies of sources). This would also help us and future editors to verify the accuracy of articles.

:::I really think it is very important for an editor who wants to improve, to fully understand what the problems are. If you would like me to go more in-depth with the problems I see, please say so, and I will. Anyhow, I'm glad you are willing to make corrections.

:::'''"Literal translation, especially of idioms, often obscures the real meaning. For example, the "woman of red gums" is a "toothless woman", i.e., an old one. We just don't express the idea that way in natural English."'''

:::True. But this could have been explained without paraphrasing quotations. To anyone who reads your quotations, then checks the actual sources, it would appear that you are exaggerating what the sources say in order to help support your claims and for added dramatic effect. That's not good.

:::'''"To be scrupulously honest, we should in fact name the translation as well as the source, and this information is not always available."'''

:::There may be exceptions, but we usually do. All of of our Qur'an and several of the major hadith collections have this information available. If you click on the left side of each reference, it will take you to it: {{Quran|4|1}} or {{Bukhari|4|55|548}}. We also have the same for Tabari (you have to click on the right side for that): {{Tabari|1|p. 273}}. The important thing is that they're from ''published'' translations. Not ones that we made up. They have to be translations that Muslims would use without a problem. [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 00:47, 14 July 2013 (PDT)
::::hi 1234567, to confirm what Sahabah said: regardless of the reasons you gave (as I said I understand your challenge of using these old sources. Its a difficult task), quotes cannot be shown as quotes when they were in fact modified or paraphrased. I don't remember seeing this happen anywhere else. It could be a script for a movie or play but it wouldn't be suitable for us. I've not written much on the site but when I have, my one and only concern is that it should be something that is irrefutable. It must be linked to a good source and it must say what the source says. Of secondary importance are things like: is it readable, does it look good, does it flow well, etc. So the paraphrasing of quotes is a critical issue. No new content should be added without dealing with these existing issues. One solution that makes it easier is for you to keep the story short and only mention important details. Another is not to use quotes and only use them when you have to. Even if you don't use quotes, writing should still be "irrefutable" and accurately reflect the source.
::::You haven't responded to the fact that you paraphrased the Quran and you showed a Quranic verse in quotes when that is not what it said. I have never even seen Muslims do something like that, because they will use another author's translation rather than creating their own. If we create things in quotes and give the impression that thats whats the Quran said, we are creating our own translation. Its not just for the Quran but everything else as well.
::::I don't think its possible to write anything for our site without first understanding the approach we take which is accuracy and reliability first, and everything else comes later. Again, you are doing a difficult task which is to use all of these sources but the first test our pages have to pass is the "defense" stage and that has to be kept in mind constantly for a site like ours. So paraphrasing quotes creates a big problem. I know this can be dealt with. I think the first step is to make a list of possible articles that may need to fixed and then tackle them one by one. You could tell us how you would deal with this. For example you have to use the sources, you cant modify quotes, you can write things without quotes but they still have to reflect what the source says. Sources referenced must be distinct so everything can be verified easily. The more you do these things the higher the reliability is and presenting things in quotes that are not in the original source cannot be done no matter what.
::::We're like a newspaper. Suppose there was this line in the newspaper: 'Jennifer said her husband was ''"buying a lot of things"'' '
::::Readers will assume that that is exactly what she said. If the newspaper had in fact paraphrased Jennifer she actually said ''"shopping at the speed of $1000 dollars an hour"'', this would be a problem and Jennifer wouldnt be happy and the readers would stop trusting the newspaper. Its a problem and to me its a very obvious problem (like I said I've never seen it happen anywhere else). I've taken a quote, modified it, and presented it in quotes -- giving the impression that whats there in the quotes is what was actually said when thats not the case. If I have to paraphrase, I have to stop using quotes and even then it has to accurately reflect what was said.
::::Once again, if quotes can be modified, we cannot tell the difference between what was actually said and what was not. I know these are big problems because its not just a few paragraphs. Its a lot of content. We're already busy in a lot of things and I dont know if we have enough time to help you extensively with this so its all up to you basically. But again, we cannot have content on the site where quotes have been paraphrased and presented as quotes when they are not quotes. I did some searching ([https://www.google.com/search?q=paraphrasing+quotation+marks&spell=1&sa=X&ei=X7niUdmqCfiq4AOxi4GgAg&ved=0CCsQvwUoAA&biw=1920&bih=852 Google]). Here's a good link about the use of quotation marks: [http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/577/01/]. It says "Indirect quotations are not exact wordings but rather rephrasings or summaries of another person's words. In this case, ''it is not necessary to use quotation marks''." (section heading: Indirect Quotations). It also says "Many writers struggle with when to use direct quotations versus indirect quotations. Use the following tips to guide you in your choice."
::::Here's someone responding to a similar issue on Yahoo answers ([http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100325064701AA8iaJ7 Do you use quotations when paraphrasing?]):
:::::''you don't use quotation marks. in text citations will do (an example of which is parenthetical citation). just make sure to give credit to your sources. '''you only use quotation marks when using DIRECT quotations, meaning everything is copied from the source in verbatim'''.''
::::Additional links: [http://writing.wisc.edu/Handbook/QPA_paraphrase2.html How to paraphrase a source]. This has a section on ''"Paraphrasing difficult texts"''. This following source [http://rwc.hunter.cuny.edu/reading-writing/on-line/qpp.html] has a section on "Too many direct quotations". Here's another [http://www.sscnet.ucla.edu/polisci/faculty/anderson/quotation.htm] which says: ''"When you paraphrase, you must entirely reword material taken from a source, '''without using quotation marks'''".'' Another Q/A: [http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Does_a_paraphrase_have_quotation_marks Does a paraphrase have quotation marks?].
::::So the steps here are to first settle this paraphrasing quotes issue and you can look other sources to see what they say and how to deal with the problem of writing content while using multiple sources, how and when to paraphrase and when/how to use direct quotations and so on. You will see they're saying the same thing we have been saying: You cant paraphrase things and present them in quotation marks.
:::: It may also be helpful to visit [https://www.google.com/search?site=&source=hp&q=writing+forum&oq=writing+forum&gs_l=hp.3..0l10.396.1786.0.2119.13.10.0.3.3.0.115.910.6j4.10.0....0...1c.1.19.hp.FqpVvPciBYg writing forums] and ask them about the challenge of writing things from old texts like these, and how to deal with the issue of paraphrasing and direct quotations while making sure everything remains accurate and matches the source and does not misrepresent or misquote. Also how to write in a journalistic style with no embellishment or decoration and so on. It would be helpful to look at these external links and talk to people who can give advice so you'll get opinions from other people as well. The steps are understanding what the problem is, and what caused things to be in this state, eliminating those approaches and changing course. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 06:57, 14 July 2013 (PDT)
::::: Okay, I have now given exact cut-and-paste wording for everything I quoted. In my professional opinion, we are dealing with low-quality translation a lot of the time (I can tell by comparing different translations and noting the poor English expression). Sticking to only one person's translation causes some sacrifice of accuracy in meaning, but if you are willing to live with that, it's your call.
::::: A couple of the quotes are not readily available in English. You noticed the one about "I never had a better wife than Khadijah," which was in fact on my list of references to check, so I must have noted earlier that I still didn't have a source for that. The source is Ibn Hanbal. On the positive side, that means it can't possibly be Shi'a propaganda but is an acceptable Sunni citation. Ibn Hanbal's quote continues in the same way as the versions found in Bukhari and Muslim. On the negative side, I'm having to take an educated guess as to which of the English translations of the sentence scattered over the web is likely to be closest (most likely the one that offers least clarity in English!). I've asked my Arab friends to check what the original says so that we can make a good translation together.
::::: The most recent version is now in Sandbox 1. I've cleared my other sandboxes.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 23:32, 17 July 2013 (PDT)

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-07-18T07:23:30Z

1234567: Blanked the page

User:1234567/Sandbox 3

2013-07-18T07:23:09Z

1234567: Blanked the page

User:1234567/Sandbox 1

2013-07-18T07:21:48Z

1234567:

==Aisha bint Abi Bakr==

[[File:DanishAisha.jpg|right|thumb|Aisha’s wedding day. Commissioned for Bluitgen, K. (2006). ''Koranen og profeten Muhammeds Liv'' (''The Quran and the Life of the Prophet Muhammad''). Copenhagen: Hoest & Soen. The artist chose to remain anonymous.|300px]]

Aisha bint Abi Bakr claimed that she was the [[Muhammad|Prophet Muhammad’s]] second wife,<ref>{{Muslim|8|3452}}.</ref> although this was not strictly correct.<ref>Aisha must have known that Muhammad married Sawdah bint Zamaa in the ninth month and herself in the tenth month of the same year ({{Tabari|39|pp. 170-171}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 43, 55; {{Muslim|8|3312}}). However, the sequence of events in {{Tabari|9|pp. 128-130}} makes it clear that Muhammad did propose to Aisha before he proposed to Sawdah: “Khawlah replied, ‘The Messenger of God has sent me to ask for A’ishah’s hand in marriage on his behalf.’ … Then Khawlah left and went to Sawdah saying, ‘O Sawdah ... the Messenger of God has sent me with a marriage proposal.’” By claiming to be the second wife, i.e., the first after Khadijah, Aisha probably wanted to emphasise that she had been Muhammad’s first choice and was therefore more important than her co-wives.</ref> She is known as Aisha ''al-Siddiqa'' (“the Truthful”)<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref> to complement her father, who was also known as ''al-Siddiq''.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 46. “Masruq … would say, “The truthful daughter of the true, whose innocence was proclaimed, told me such-and-such.”</ref> This byname originally referred, not to Abu Bakr’s personal honesty, but to his “testimony to the truth” of Muhammad’s miraculous [[The Holy Qur'an: Al-Isra (The Night Journey)|Night Journey]].<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 183.</ref> Muslims consider Aisha another major “witness to the truth” of Muhammad’s prophetic office. The Syrian scholar Ismail ibn Umar ibn Kathir wrote:
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|A great deal of the knowledge that we still have today, about how our beloved Prophet lived and behaved, was first remembered and then taught to others by Aisha … This is what makes it so much easier for those who wish to follow in their footsteps to try and follow their example.}}
Aisha’s witness has bequeathed to the world a wealth of truth about the nature of Islam.

===Aisha’s Background===

Aisha was born in [[Mecca]] “at the beginning of the fourth year of prophethood,”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55.</ref> i.e., between 25 October 613 and 19 February 614.

Her father was the cloth-merchant Abu Bakr ibn Abi Quhafah from the Taym clan of the Quraysh. “He was a man whose society was desired, well liked and of easy manners … of high character and kindliness. His people used to come to him to discuss many matters with him because of his wide knowledge, his experience in commerce, and his sociable nature.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 115.</ref> His generosity had made him popular in the city.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}.</ref> Abu Bakr’s first wife was Qutaylah bint Abduluzza from the Amir ibn Luayy clan of the Quraysh. She bore him a daughter, Asma.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> He then married his business partner’s widow, Umm Ruman (Zaynab) bint Amir. She was an immigrant from the Kinana tribe whose only relative in Mecca was her young son, Tufayl ibn Al-Harith;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 171}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 193.</ref> Muhammad once said that “whoever is pleased to look at a woman of the ''houris'' should look at Umm Ruman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 193.</ref> She was the mother of Abu Bakr’s first son, Abdulrahman.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 171-172}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 193.</ref> Qutaylah then bore him a second son, Abdullah;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> but soon afterwards, Abu Bakr divorced Qutaylah.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 178: “Abu Bakr had divorced her in the ''Jahiliyah'',” i.e., before Islam, and therefore probably not, as is sometimes asserted, because of religious differences.</ref>

The family lived near [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] house<ref>Muir (1861). ''The Life of Mohamet'', p. 100. London: Smith, Elder & Co.</ref> and must have known Muhammad for several years before the latter declared himself a prophet in 610. Abu Bakr “did not hold back or hesitate.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 116.</ref> He was the first male outside Muhammad’s family to convert to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 114-115. According to {{Tabari|39|p. 201}}, one woman, Lubabah bint Al-Harith, claimed that her conversion pre-dated Abu Bakr’s.</ref> “When he became a Muslim, he showed his faith openly and called others to God and his apostle … He began to call to God and to Islam all whom he trusted of those who came to him and sat with him … He brought them to the apostle when they had accepted his invitation and they accepted Islam and prayed.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 115, 116.</ref> The earliest Muslim historian, [[Ibn Ishaq|Muhammad ibn Ishaq]], lists fifty people who became Muslims through Abu Bakr’s preaching,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 115-117.</ref> which was probably the majority of the earliest converts.

Aisha was born in the year when Islam was first publicly preached in Mecca<ref> Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55; Guillaume/Ishaq p. 117.</ref> and she never knew any lifestyle other than Islam.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> She grew up in a household where her mother was the only wife and she had four much-older siblings. The records also mention several servants.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 116, 144, 224; </ref> Aisha was still a baby when a pagan neighbour, Al-Mutim ibn Adiy, proposed that she marry his son Jubayr. Abu Bakr informally accepted this proposal but he did not enter a binding marriage contract.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}.</ref> Aisha’s paternal grandparents, already in their seventies at the time of her birth, lived nearby.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 225.</ref> Her grandmother, Umm Al-Khayr bint Sakhr, was a Muslim,<ref>Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' vol. 8.</ref> but her grandfather, Abu Quhafah ibn Amir, remained a pagan. When he spoke disparagingly of Muhammad, Abu Bakr hit his father’s chest so hard that the old man became unconscious.<ref>Qurtubi, ''Tafsir'' vol. 17 p. 307. Cited in [http://books.google.com.au/books?id=AeAG74TdAXEC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=false/ Radtke, B., & O’Kane, J. (1996). ''The Concept of Sainthood in Early Islamic Mysticism'', p. 142. Richmond, Surrey: Curzon Press] and also in [http://www.tasawwuf.org/writings/love_prophet/love_abubakr.pdf/ “The Love of Hadrat Abu Bakr”, p. 6, in ''Tasawwuf'']. It is said that Allah sent down {{Quran|58|22}} in response.</ref>

Aisha was less than three years old when the Quraysh declared a blockade against the Hashimite clan.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 159-160.</ref> Abu Bakr considered leaving Mecca to join the exiles in Abyssinia. But he found a protector who agreed to keep the neighbours from harassing him on condition he confined his religion to the privacy of his home and did not try to convert anyone else. Abu Bakr kept to the letter of the agreement and stopped preaching outside his home. But he later built a mosque in the courtyard of his house, where he once again read the Qur’an out loud, and women and youths flocked to hear his preaching. The men complained about this, and Abu Bakr renounced his protection.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; Guillaume/Ishaq p. 171.</ref> Nevertheless, the worst recorded attack on Abu Bakr is that “one of the loutish fellows of Quraysh” once threw dust on his head,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 171-172.</ref> an understandable expression of annoyance under the circumstances. Aisha recalled that the ''ayah''' {{Quran|54|46}}, concerning the occasion when the moon was miraculously split in the sky, was first recited in Mecca when she was a little girl at play, three or four years old. She did not, however, claim to remember the miracle itself.<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|387}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|388}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|399}}; {{Bukhari|6|61|515}}. The Lebanese scholar Dr [http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Gibril Haddad] says: “The ''hadith'' masters, ''sira'' historians and Qur’anic commentators agree that the splitting of the moon took place about five years before the Holy Prophet’s ''Hijra'' to Madina,” i.e., in 617-618.</ref>

When Aisha was six, the blockade against the Hashim clan was revoked, and they emerged from hiding in the mountain ravine. After that, Muhammad came to visit her father every morning and evening.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> Aisha never met his wife Khadijah,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|166}}.</ref> who returned to Mecca in poor health and died shortly afterwards.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 191; {{Tabari|39|pp. 4, 161}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 12, 152.</ref>

===Reasons for the Marriage===

When Khadijah died in April 620, “the Prophet was terribly grieved over her,”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 54.</ref> and “people feared for him.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 44.</ref> After only a few days, Khawlah bint Hakim, the sister-in-law of his friend [[Umar al Khattab (quotes)|Umar]],<ref>She was married to Uthman ibn Mazoon (Guillaume/Ishaq p. 590), whose sister Zaynab was married to Umar (Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 56).</ref> decided that he needed a new wife. She called on Muhammad to tell him that she knew of both a maid and a matron whom he might [[Marriage|marry]] and asked which one he would prefer. He immediately responded that he would take them both.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}.</ref>

The maid was Abu Bakr’s daughter. It is often claimed that Muhammad married her “to reinforce the friendly relations already existing with Abu Bakr.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?''].</ref> In one sense this is true: Abu Bakr was one of the few men in Mecca who would still have been willing to give him a daughter.<ref>For Muhammad’s unpopularity with his pagan neighbours, see Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 191-194.</ref> But this theory mistakes cause and effect. The marriage did not “promote” any alliance with Abu Bakr; rather, it was the existing close bond with Abu Bakr that made the marriage possible. Muhammad’s request to his friend might not even have reflected Khawlah’s original intention, for the oral traditions about Muhammad’s life were first put in writing long after his death,<ref>Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: Its Origin, Development, Special Features and Criticism'', pp. 8-9. “''Hadith'' which thus spread throughout the vast Muslim dominions had been preserved for a century partly in writing (in the form of laws and letters dictated by Muhammad himself, and in the form of various ''Sahifahs'' ascribed to many of his Companions), and partly in the memory of those who had associated with him and watched carefully his words and deeds. After the death of Muhammad, Umar I intended to collect the ''Ahadith''. He gave the matter his careful consideration for one whole month, invoking the help of God in his decision, and seeking the advice of his friends. But he had to give up the great project for fear of the Qur’an being neglected by the Muslims.” Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> and it could be that they have been distorted by narrators who did not know about the interview with Khawlah until they also had hind-knowledge of its result. It is not impossible that Khawlah originally mentioned “Abu Bakr’s daughter” without giving the name, and that she had actually been referring to his elder daughter Asma. Regardless of whether or not Khawlah was complicit in the eventual outcome, what happened was that Muhammad completely overlooked the sixteen-year-old Asma<ref>[http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Haddad] reports Al-Dhahabi’s claim (''Siyar Alam al-Nubala'' vol. 2 p. 289) that Asma was ten years older than Aisha. Haddad points out that Al-Dhahabi elsewhere suggests Asma might have been even older than this, possibly as old as twenty-five.</ref> and asked instead to marry the six-year-old Aisha.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref>

It is also suggested that Muhammad “married Aisha for the benefit of Islam and Humanity … From her, 2210 Hadith have come... Many of her transmissions pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behaviour which only someone in Aisha's position could have learnt.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?'']</ref> There is no evidence to support this theory. If Muhammad had wanted the traditions about his life to be securely transmitted to posterity, he would not have relied on the hope that his young widow might later think of it; he would have arranged to have them committed to writing during his lifetime. He never did. Further, if he had believed that a wife was the best kind of chronicler, he would have chosen an adult spouse who knew how to write. Aisha could in fact read<ref>{{Bukhari|6|61|515}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> but she never learned to write.<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “It is reported that Aisha used to read the Qur’an but she did not write.”</ref>

What Muhammad later said was that [[Allah]] had instructed him to marry Aisha. He said the angel [[Gabriel|Jibreel]] had appeared to him in a dream, holding a veiled child and saying, “Messenger of Allah, this one will remove some of your sorrow. This one has some of the qualities of Khadijah.” Then he lifted the veil, revealing that the child was Aisha.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 54-55; {{Muslim|31|5977}}.</ref> In a second dream, Jibreel showed him Aisha’s portrait painted on silk, promising, “This is your wife.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|235}}. See also {{Bukhari|5|68|235}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|15}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|57}}; {{Bukhari|9|87|139}}; {{Bukhari|9|87|140}}.</ref> If Muhammad really had any such dream, it is disturbing that he would act on it so literally.

Muhammad’s decision to marry Aisha was made less than three weeks after Khadijah’s death<ref>Khadijah died on 10 Ramadan, and Muhammad married Sawdah before Ramadan had ended. Even if he married her (and decided to marry Aisha) on the ''same day'' as Khawlah’s visit, this was a maximum of twenty days after Khadijah’s death. Common sense suggests that it would have more likely taken a day or two to organise the wedding, which did not necessarily take place as late as the final day of the month.</ref> while he was grieving. He was not necessarily making wise decisions, even from his own point of view. Muhammad’s choice of Aisha over Asma must have been influenced by personal qualities that Aisha had and Asma lacked. While Asma’s appearance is never described, Aisha was very pretty. This was conceded by people who had no vested interest<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|435}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|145}}.</ref> as well as by those who might have been biased.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> She was slim and light-framed<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}}</ref> with a fair, rosy complexion and perhaps also red hair,<ref>Muhammad sometimes (e.g., Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55) addressed Aisha as ''Humayra'', which means “little red one”. This was not a commonplace nickname, so Aisha’s degree of redness must have been unusual.</ref> which she wore plaited.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|241}}.</ref> Her nephew later said, “I did not see a greater scholar than Aisha in poetry, literature, Arab history and genealogy,”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 67; Al-Hakim, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 4 p. 11.</ref> and it was said that there was no one else “more intelligent in opinion if her opinion was sought.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 2 p. 481.</ref> While we might question whether Muhammad was aware of her intelligence when she was only six years old, she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah,” who is described as “determined and intelligent”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 82.</ref>

===Marriage Contract===

When Muhammad made his formal request for Aisha’s hand, he did not mention that Allah had “commanded”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55.</ref> him to marry her. Abu Bakr hesitated at first, saying, “She is [like] his brother’s daughter. Would she be appropriate for him?” But Muhammad said that Abu Bakr was only “my brother in Islam,” which did not preclude such a marriage.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref> Abu Bakr had to break off Aisha’s informal engagement to Jubayr ibn Al-Mutim, but this proved easy, as the pagan family no longer wished to risk that their son might convert to Islam.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}.</ref> So Abu Bakr married his daughter to Muhammad in May or June 620. Unlike Abu Bakr’s previous agreement with Al-Mutim, his contract with Muhammad was not a “betrothal” or “engagement” (as some English translators have suggested) but in every way a legally binding marriage, which could only be dissolved by death or divorce.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|1|7|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|2|3309}}; {{Muslim|2|3310}}; {{Muslim|2|3311}}; {{Muslim|4|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref>

Aisha later claimed that she had not known that she was married until the very day of the consummation.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 43. “I did not know that the Messenger of Allah had married me until my mother took me and made me sit in the room rather than being outside [on the day of the consummation]. Then it occurred to me that I was married.”</ref> That Aisha did not know that she was married was, of course, nothing unusual. Throughout history and in nearly every culture, betrothals have been arranged over cradles, and women in particular have been married without their knowledge, understanding or consent. The fact that Aisha was a child is barely an issue here; no woman of any age should be married without her own consent, whether she is six, sixteen, thirty-six or sixty. However, it is unlikely that any seventh-century Arab grasped “informed consent” in the way the modern West understands it. Muhammad’s similar failure to grasp it betrays that he was no prophet or pioneer of human rights but was simply a normal product of his own culture.

Muhammad instructed Umm Ruman, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position”. One day Aisha said something about her mother to her father, which made Abu Bakr angry with both of them. Umm Ruman “came after” Aisha, who “hid” behind the front door, “weeping with great distress.” When Muhammad arrived for his daily visit, Aisha told him everything. Muhammad’s eyes “overflowed with tears” as he reminded Umm Ruman, “Did I not tell you to watch over Aisha for me?” Umm Ruman tried to give her side of the story, but Muhammad replied, “And if she did?” Aisha’s mother had to promise, “I will never trouble her again.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55.</ref> As the specific details have been omitted from this story, it is not apparent whether it was Umm Ruman who was a difficult mother or Aisha who was a difficult child, or even whether it was Abu Bakr who was a difficult husband and father; but it is certain that Muhammad was interfering with another family’s affairs without any interest in knowing all the facts.

In 622 Abu Bakr accompanied Muhammad on his flight (''Hijra'') to [[Medina]]. He took all his savings with him, leaving nothing to support his family, much to the consternation of his elderly father. Asma had to fool her grandfather, who was blind, by touching his hand to a cloth covering a pile of stones and letting him believe they were a sack of coins.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 225.</ref> Fortunately it was only a few months before Abu Bakr sent for his family to join him in Medina. Aisha had an adventure on the way: “My camel broke loose. I was sitting in the litter together with my mother, and she started exclaiming ‘Alas, my daughter, alas [you] bride’; then they caught up with our camel, after it had safely descended the Lift”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172}); Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 44-45.</ref> [Valley]. After the dry heat of Mecca, the emigrants found Medina damp and cool, and several of them were struck by fever. Aisha was bemused by the delirious ramblings of two of Abu Bakr’s servants and asked Muhammad what it meant. Some of the Muslims were so weak that they said their prayers sitting down until Muhammad advised them, “The prayer of the sitter is only half as valuable as the prayer of the stander.” Thereupon they “painfully struggled to their feet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 413-414.</ref> Then Aisha herself became feverish for a whole month, and her hair fell out.<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876.</ref>

===Paedophilia===

After Aisha had recovered, and her hair had again “become abundant,”<ref>[[http://ia600805.us.archive.org/6/items/SunanIbnMajah5Vol.Set/Sunan-Ibn-Majah-Volume-3-English.pdf/ Ibn Majah 3:1876.]</ref> Abu Bakr approached Muhammad and asked him if he would like to consummate the marriage. He did not explain why he suddenly lost his scruples over child-marriage; but Aisha’s illness would have hinted at her mortality, while the flight to Medina must have altered the political landscape unrecognisably, so perhaps Abu Bakr felt the need to confirm his continuing importance in the Muslim hierarchy. The family landscape had also changed, for Abu Bakr had lately acquired a new wife, Habibah bint Kharijah, a Medinan woman whom he visited in the suburbs at a discreet distance from the mosque.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 243. “Habiba bint Kharija ibn Zayd … married Abu Bakr ''as-Siddiq'' and bore him Umm Kulthum.” See also Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 227, 234, 681; {{Tabari|11|pp. 151-152}}. Habibah never resided near the mosque even after Umm Ruman died.</ref> Perhaps he expected this marriage to produce new financial burdens, although in fact Habibah’s only child, Umm Kulthum, was not to be born until 634.<ref>{{Tabari|11|p. 141 & f769}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 243; {{Muwatta|36|33|40}}.</ref> It is worth noting that Habibah’s grandfather was still alive and apparently fit and active.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/AsbabAlnuzol.asp?SoraName=4&Ayah=34&search=yes&img=A/ Al-Wahidi, ''Asbab Al-Nuzul''. Translated by Guezzou, M. (2011). ''Context of Revelation'', Q4:34. Amman, Jordan: Royal Aal al-Bayt Institute for Islamic Thought.]</ref> This suggests that Habibah was a very young woman, which might also have caused Abu Bakr to revise his ideas about the suitable age for a girl to marry.

Muhammad did not express any outrage or disgust at this invitation; instead of correcting his friend’s morality, he merely confessed that he had no cash to pay the dower. Abu Bakr replied that he would provide this.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172-173}}.</ref> The earliest source states that it was a sum of 400 ''dirhams''<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918</ref> (about £2,000), but others say 12½ ''ouwkiyas'',<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 173, 189}}; {{Muslim|38|3318}; {{Abudawud|11|2101}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 118. The ''ouwkiyas'' were presumably of silver, since the same weight of gold would have had ten times this value. Perhaps the later chroniclers updated for inflation.</ref> which would have been worth 500 ''dirhams'' (£2,500). It is also said that that dower was “some household goods worth 50 ''dirhams''”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 44.</ref> (£250), so perhaps part of the value was paid in kind.

[[File:Mosque630.jpg|left|thumb|Plan of the mosque at Medina, c. 630. Aisha’s house is at the top left, marked with A.|300px]]

Umm Ruman also cooperated with the new plan. She tried to fatten Aisha up before sending her to Muhammad’s house. Several types of food failed to replace the flesh that she had lost during her illness “till she gave me cucumber with fresh dates to eat. Then I became fat as good.”<ref>{{Abudawud|28|3894}}.</ref> In April or May 623 Aisha, now aged nine, was playing on a swing<ref>According to [http://ia600805.us.archive.org/6/items/SunanIbnMajah5Vol.Set/Sunan-Ibn-Majah-Volume-3-English.pdf/ Ibn Majah 3:1876 note b], an ''urjuhah'' could mean either a “swing” or a “seesaw”.</ref> with some friends when her mother called her over. Still breathless, Aisha was taken to the little house that had just been built into the wall of the mosque, a hut of unbaked bricks with a palm-branch roof, perhaps five metres by four in size.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 172-173; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 121; [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 65.3/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 1:65:3].</ref> When she was brought inside, where some ''ansar'' women wished her “blessings and good fortune,”<ref>[http://ia600805.us.archive.org/6/items/SunanIbnMajah5Vol.Set/Sunan-Ibn-Majah-Volume-3-English.pdf/ Ibn Majah 3:1876]</ref> “it occurred to me that I was married. I did not ask her and my mother was the one who told me.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 43.</ref> For some reason, Umm Ruman then departed, leaving the ''ansar'' women to wash and perfume Aisha, dress her up in a red-striped gown and comb her hair. When her father’s friend Muhammad arrived, she was surprised, suggesting that she had still not guessed the identity of her bridegroom, but not afraid. The women left the house, and Muhammad sat her on his lap.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|7|62|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|8|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3310}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Abudawud|41|4915}}; {{Abudawud|41|4917}}; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; [http://ia600805.us.archive.org/6/items/SunanIbnMajah5Vol.Set/Sunan-Ibn-Majah-Volume-3-English.pdf/ Ibn Majah 3:1877].</ref> The consummation was not marked by any kind of wedding party or public celebration: “neither a camel nor a sheep was slaughtered on behalf of me.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 131}}.</ref> This possibly indicates that, while the Muslim converts did not question Muhammad’s judgment, he knew only too well what his [[Islam and the People of the Book|Jewish]] neighbours would think of his bigamy.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 143. “They envied him because of the number of his wives and they criticised him for that, saying, ‘If he had been a prophet, he would not have desired women.’ The most intense of them in that criticism was Huyayy ibn Akhtab,” the chief of the Nadir tribe. It is probably not a coincidence that, just five years later, Muhammad’s collection of wives had expanded to include Huyayy’s favourite daughter. It is not stated, however, that Huyayy had a specific objection to Aisha’s extreme youth.</ref>

Aisha said, “I was preferred over the wives of the Prophet,”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 46</ref> and asked rhetorically, “Which of his wives is more fortunate than me?”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 44.</ref> She never recognised that she had been [[Rape in Islam|raped]]. She spoke calmly of the way Muhammad sucked her tongue<ref>{{Abudawud|13|2380}}.</ref> and took baths with her in the same tub,<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|263}}; {{Bukhari|1|6|298}}.</ref> and of how she would then wash the semen off his clothes<ref>{{Bukhari|1|4|229}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|230}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|231}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|232}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|233}}.</ref> and anoint him with perfume<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|267}}.</ref> (his favourite was ''dhikarat al-tayyib'', a blend of musk and ambergris<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:11.</ref>).

Aisha’s acceptance of the situation does not alter the fact that a fifty-two-year-old man should have known better than to engage sexually with a nine-year-old. Most cultures throughout history have understood that a girl should not be touched before puberty. The Jews in Medina most certainly understood it.<ref>Ezekiel 16:7-8; [http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm/ “Prohibited Marriages and Illegitimate Children”] in ''Judaism 101''.</ref> Muslim apologists have tried to plead that Aisha was an early developer for whom “it is most likely her puberty started at 8, and continued till she was 9, and once she was going through puberty and her menses, this made her a lady and not a girl anymore.”<ref>[http://muslim-responses.com/Marriage_with_Aisha/Marriage_with_Aisha_/ Zaatari, S. “A Detailed analysis of the Prophet's Marriage to Aisha”] in ''Muslim Responses''.</ref> But this is not correct. Aisha had still not reached menarche by the age of fourteen and a half, more than five years after the consummation of her marriage. She several times described her fourteen-year-old self as a ''jariya'' (“prepubescent girl”)<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}} also refers to her light weight at the time of the raid on the Mustaliq tribe. {{Muslim|4|1940}} emphasises her “tender age” at the time of the Abyssinian sword-display, which must have happened after the Order of the Veil, since Muhammad had to screen her, i.e., at earliest in February 628.</ref> and in July 628 was still playing with dolls, which were forbidden to adults but permitted to prepubescents.<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}.</ref> Although this could not have been predicted on her wedding day, she actually belonged to the 10% of girls who are latest in reaching puberty.<ref>The [http://www.mum.org/menarage.htm/ mean age of menarche] was 12½ years. This is quite similar to today, when the [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2733039/ standard deviation] is about 18 months. So probably only 5% of Aisha’s contemporaries would have been menstruating before age ten, 16% by age eleven, 32% by age twelve, 68% by age thirteen, 84% by age fourteen, 95% by age fifteen and over 99% by age sixteen.</ref> At nine, she would have been flat-chested and only three-quarters of her future height; nobody could have mistaken her for an adult. Unlike the informed consent issue, which simply reveals that Muhammad was a product of his culture, this act of paederasty betrays that Muhammad was morally inferior to his own culture. He rejected the moral norms of his wisest contemporaries and abused a little girl for no better reason than that Abu Bakr had made it easy for him to do so. He demonstrated for once and for all that he had no timeless, universal moral insight to offer the world – in short, that he was not a prophet.

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Aisha was to remain Muhammad’s favourite wife.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}.</ref> He claimed that Aisha was dearer to him “than butter with dates”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55.</ref> and superior to all other women in the same way that a meat stew was superior to plain bread.<ref>{{Bukhari|4|55|623}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|113}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|114}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|329}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|330}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|339}}.</ref> When a companion asked him, “Who is the most beloved person to you?” he replied, “Aisha!” When the young man protested that he had meant ''male'' persons, Muhammad corrected his reply to, “Her father.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|57|14}}.</ref> He made himself a doorway in the mosque wall close to Aisha’s house-door,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 173}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 45.</ref> presumably to visit her more conveniently. At table he would eat meat from a bone that she had bitten and drink from her cup.<ref>[http://ahadith.co.uk/chapter.php?cid=153&page=7/ Nasa’i 1:70.]</ref> She asked, “How is your love for me?” and he replied that it was, “like the rope’s knot” – strong and secure. After that she would often ask, “How is the knot?” and he would reply, “The same as ever!”<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref>

Muhammad allowed Aisha her playtime. Her collection of dolls included at least three shaped like female humans<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and a stuffed horse with wings. Muhammad questioned her about this anomaly but he laughed when she reminded him that Solomon was supposed to have owned winged horses.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4914}}.</ref> Strangely, neither of them mentioned that Muhammad himself claimed to have ridden a winged horse a few years earlier.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 182; {{Bukhari|4|54|429}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|227}}.</ref> Aisha said that (presumably after she grew older) she used to hide her dolls under a garment when Muhammad entered, “but she did not stop.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 47.</ref> At first her playmates “felt shy of Allah’s Messenger” and used to leave the house<ref>{{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> or “hide themselves” when Muhammad entered, “but the Prophet would call them to join and play with me.”<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}</ref> At festival time her friends sang badly and beat tambourines in her house, although Muhammad came to lie down there. Abu Bakr rebuked them: “Musical instruments of Satan near the Prophet!” But Muhammad told the girls not to stop their play for him.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}; {{Bukhari|2|15|72}}.</ref> Later that day, some Abyssinian guests put on a display in the mosque courtyard to demonstrate their prowess with shields and spears. Women were not really allowed, but Muhammad circumvented the regulation by standing in front of Aisha at her front door, screening her with his cloak, so that she could watch the performance without being seen.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}.</ref> She once beat him in a running race. Later, after she had put on weight, they raced again, and he won, remarking, “This is for that outstripping!”<ref>{{Abudawud|14|2572}}.</ref> Given the chance to mount an unbroken camel, she drove it “round and round” until Muhammad had to remind her to be gentle with the animal.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6275}}; {{Muslim|32|6274}}. See also {{Abudawud|41|4790}}.</ref>

But what these “innocent” episodes demonstrate, above anything else, is that Aisha ''was'' a child. A grown woman does not play with dolls and swings. Aisha was just a little girl who, like any other little girl, played games with her bath-water<ref>Nasa’i vol. 1 #413, #414. Translated by Al-Khattab, N. (2007), Dar-us-Salam, pp. 243-244.</ref> and could not cook.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}} reveals that Aisha usually delegated the daily baking to her maid and did not even watch the rising dough reliably. In Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 227 (see also {{Bukhari|1|7|152}}), the teenaged Aisha is so jealous of a co-wife’s superior culinary skills that she smashes her dish.</ref> And no little girl could match the most powerful adult in the community in assertiveness. When Aisha was angry with Muhammad, she often resorted to hinting at it indirectly by declaiming, “By the lord of Ibrahim,” instead of her usual, “By the lord of Muhammad.” However, he took the hint.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|155}}.</ref>

===Poverty===

Muhammad taught that women “have the right to their food and clothing in accordance with custom.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 113}}. See also {{Abudawud|11|2137}}.</ref> But he did not provide much food for Aisha, and she was always hungry. She was underweight because she so rarely ate meat.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 494; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> She claimed she never ate barley bread for more than three successive days. Sometimes the family did not light a fire for a month on end because they had nothing to cook but lived off dates and water.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7085}}; {{Muslim|42|7083}}; {{Muslim|42|7086}}; {{Muslim|42|7084}}; {{Muslim|42|7087}}; {{Muslim|42|7089}}; {{Muslim|42|7092}}; {{Muslim|42|7093}}; {{Muslim|42|7097}}; {{Muslim|42|7098}}.</ref> A neighbour once sent Aisha a pudding. While she was finishing her prayers, a cat came in and ate some of it, but she had no compunction in eating from the place that the cat had licked.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|76}}. This incident probably dates from after Aisha was widowed; but she maintained the habits she had learned from Muhammad.</ref>

Muhammad told Aisha, “Beware of sitting with the wealthy, and do not replace a garment until you have already mended it.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 53.</ref> Throughout her life, she disliked discarding worn-out clothes.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 52.</ref> She did own a gown costing about five ''dirhams'' (£25), and “no woman desiring to appear elegant before her husband failed to borrow [it] from me.” But the cloth cannot have been of very high quality compared to what became available in Medina in later decades, for although the widowed Aisha continued to wear similar clothes, her [[Slavery|slave]] refused to wear such a coarse gown in the house.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|796}}.</ref> The mosque had no indoor toilets, for “we loathe and detest them,”<ref>Guilaume/Ishaq 495.</ref> and Aisha did not have a lamp in her house.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|9|492}}.</ref> When her quilt was stolen, she began to curse the unknown thief. However, Muhammad told her not to do so, because curses on earth would only lessen the thief’s punishment in the Hereafter.<ref>{{Abudawud|8|1492}}; {{Abudawud|41|4891}}.</ref>

Charity was a way of life for the Arabs, and of course the Prophet’s young wife had to set the example. In the early years, beggars sat on the Bench in the mosque courtyard waiting for food distribution.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|10|576}}: “The ''Suffa'' companions were poor people, and the Prophet said, ‘Whoever has food for two persons should take a third one from them.’” See also [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life3/chap8.htm/ Muir (1861), pp. 20-21.]</ref> Aisha used to count them until Muhammad told her, “Give and do not calculate, [or else] calculation will be made against you.”<ref>{{Abudawud|9|1696}}.</ref> Sometimes he brought them into her house to be fed; one beneficiary remembered that Aisha could only provide hashish,<ref>Native speakers of Arabic could not think of any other way to translate the word ''hashishah''. They found it very plausible that Aisha would provide the drug as a kind of appetiser while she prepared the main course, in the same spirit that a Westerner might provide a glass of wine.</ref> a dish of ''haysah'' (sauce) “as small in quantity as a pigeon” and a bowl of milk.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|5022}}.</ref> When a beggar came to her door on a fast-day, and Aisha told her maid to give him their only loaf. The servant protested that there would be nothing to break their fast, but Aisha insisted.<ref>{{Muwatta|58|1|5}}.</ref> On another occasion, a widow with two daughters came begging, and Aisha’s larder was reduced to one date. She handed it over, and the widow divided it between the children without taking anything for herself.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6362}}; {{Bukhari|8|73|24}}.</ref> Ibn Kathir, writing seven hundred years after the event, cited this old tradition.
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|The Prophet had sacrificed an animal, and Ayesha was so generous in sharing the meat out amongst the poor that she found that she had left nothing for the Messenger’s large household except the shoulder of the animal. Feeling a little distressed, she went to the Prophet, and said, ‘I’ve only been able to save this.’ ‘That is the only part that you have not saved,’ smiled the Prophet, ‘for whatever you give away in the name of Allah, you save, and whatever you keep for yourself, you lose.’”}}
The shoulder was Muhammad’s favourite part of the sheep.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 516</ref>

The fact that Aisha had a servant does not indicate very much about the comfort-level of her home. Barira was a slave whom Aisha bought for nine ''ouwkiyas'' of silver (about £1,800) with the specific goal of immediate manumission. As it happened, Barira had nowhere else to go, so she chose to stay with Aisha as a domestic maid.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 181; {{Bukhari|3|47|752}}.</ref> Muhammad put up the silver, which only proves that (largely through the successes of his wars and robberies<ref>For the booty from his battles, see Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 324, 326-327, 438, 466; {{Tabari|7|p. 87}}.</ref>) he by now had some money in his coffer. But he spent his money on arming his warriors,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 466.</ref> bribing the double-minded<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 594-597</ref> or assisting the poor<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 521.</ref> (which included such acts as manumitting slaves). According to Aisha, it did not translate to food for his household. “The Prophet of Allah liked three worldly objects – perfume, women and food … He obtained women and perfumes but did not get food.”<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 90.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:4.]</ref> The servant Barira was an extra mouth for Muhammad to feed, and she must have been as hungry as her young mistress.

After the conquest of Khaybar in July 628, Muhammad was no longer poor, and Aisha was granted a share of the revenues.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 521-523.</ref> She hoped that “Now we will eat our fill of dates!”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|547}}. See also {{Muslim|9|3506}} and {{Muslim|9|3510}}, dating from this period.</ref> But if her rations improved, she did not remember it afterwards, so the majority of her sacks of wheat and dates must have been sold for cash or distributed to the poor. On the day Muhammad died, he was “King” of all Arabia, but Aisha’s barrel contained only one handful of barley.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7091}}; Jalalayn’s commentary on Q93:8.</ref>

===Co-Wives===

Aisha was jealous of the deceased Khadijah “because Allah’s Apostle used to mention her very often.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|165}}.</ref> She annoyed him by remarking that it was “Khadijah only who always prevails on your mind,<ref>{{Muslim|31|5972}}.</ref> as if there is no woman on earth except Khadijah!<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|166}}.</ref> Why do you remember one of those old women of the Quraysh with gums red and who is long dead – while Allah has given you a better one in her stead?”<ref>{{Muslim|31|5976}}. See also {{Bukhari|5|58|164}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|168}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|156}}; {{Bukhari|8|73|33}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|576}}; {{Muslim|31|5971}}; {{Muslim|31|5974}}.</ref> Eventually Muhammad became angry and announced, “Allah did not grant me better than her!” Aisha regretted her words and pledged “not ever to speak ill of her as long as I live.”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118, 150.</ref>

Aisha’s assertion that “I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadijah”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|166}}.</ref> was perhaps hyperbolic, for she made similar remarks about some of the other wives.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 149: “I was not jealous about a woman except for my jealousy towards Maria.” Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 66-67: “When the Messenger of Allah married Umm Salama, I felt very unhappy ... I was jealous.” {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}: “I was upset by both near and remote troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty.” Guillaume/Ishaq p. 490. “As soon as I saw [Juwayriya] at the door of my room, I took a dislike to her.”</ref> Perhaps she would not have minded so much about Khadijah if she had not also had to compete with living [[Polygamy|co-wives]]. Muhammad kept acquiring new women, and by March 630, when Aisha was sixteen, he had eleven legal wives plus two official concubines.<ref>The wives were Aisha, Sawdah, Hafsah, Hind, Zaynab, Juwayriyah, Ramlah, Safiyah, Maymunah, Mulaykah and Fatima. The concubines were Rayhanah and Mariyah. Muhammad divorced Mulaykah and Fatima, and the several women who joined the household after this point never remained very long.</ref> At one stage he announced a revelation from Allah that he must not marry any more women “even though their beauty attracts you.”<ref>{{Quran|33|52}}.</ref> Historians have found it difficult to date this verse because there was no significant period (in Medina) when Muhammad stopped marrying. But the revelation is of no great importance, for “Allah lifted the restriction stated in this ''ayah'' and permitted him to marry more women ... ‘A’ishah said: ‘The Messenger of Allah did not die until Allah permitted (marriage to other) women for him.’”<ref>[http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1837&Itemid=89/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:52]. See also Nasa’i vol. 4 p. 87 #3207: “The Messenger of Allah did not die until Allah permitted him to marry whatever women he wanted.”</ref>

Aisha was quick to emphasise her position as the preferred wife. She enumerated that she was Muhammad’s most beloved wife; that she was the only one in whose bed he received revelations; that she was the only one who used to lie down in front of him while he was praying; that her father was his most beloved companion; that she was the one whose innocence was revealed from Heaven; that Muhammad suffered his final illness in her house, where she had nursed him; that he died in her lap and on her rostered day; and that in her house he lay buried.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 46, 47.</ref> With less plausibility, she also claimed that she was the first woman whom Muhammad married after Khadijah;<ref>{{Muslim|8|3452}}.</ref> that Allah had sent an angel to command the marriage; that she was his only virgin bride; that only she had parents who were both emigrants; that only she bathed in the same tub as the Prophet; and that only she saw Jibreel. But these latter claims to uniqueness could all be challenged.<ref>Sawdah was almost certainly married before Aisha ({{Tabari|39|p. 170}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 39); Zaynab claimed divine command for her marriage ({{Tabari|8|pp. 3-4}}; {{Tabari|9|p. 134}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 181, 182}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 73-74); Mariyah (Guillaume/Ishaq p. 653; {{Tabari|9|p. 137}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 193}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 148-149), Mulaykah ({{Tabari|8|p. 187}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 165}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 106) and Fatima ({{Tabari|9|p. 138}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 186-188}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 100-101) were presumably all virgins, although the first was only a concubine and the two latter were later divorced; Hafsah’s parents were both emigrants (Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 216-217; cf {{Bukhari|3|43|648}} and similar ''ahadith'' for evidence that Hafsah’s mother was also in Medina); Maymunah bathed in the same tub (Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 97); Hind claimed to have seen Jibreel ({{Bukhari|4|56|827}}; {{Muslim|31|6006}}).</ref>

Muhammad set up an orderly roster so that each wife would have an equal share of his attention. Every afternoon he paid a social call on all his wives before settling in the house where he intended to sleep.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|766}}. See also {{Bukhari|3|48|853}}; {{Muslim|8|3450}}; {{Muslim|8|3451}}; {{Muslim|8|3452}}.</ref> When he went on a journey, he cast lots among his wives to determine who would accompany him.<ref>{{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> But rosters and lotteries could not disguise his preference for Aisha. “When a lot other than mine came out, his dislike could be seen. He did not return from any journey and visit any of his wives before me. The division [roster] began with me.”<ref>Bewely/Saad 8:124.</ref> He said out loud, “Aisha has a part in me occupied by no one else.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 176}}.</ref> When he told his wives that he would give “the one I love the most” an onyx necklace, he teased them by waiting for them to say he would give it to Aisha before presenting it to his little granddaughter.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 27-28; 163-164.</ref>

Inevitably, Aisha was not always the wife who benefited from Muhammad’s favouritism. A revelation gave him special permission, not available to any other Muslim, to postpone one wife’s turn if he wanted to be with another.<ref>{{Quran|33|51}}; {{Bukhari|3|47|766}}.</ref> He would ask the rostered wife’s permission before he postponed her, but Aisha never dared say no. She only told him: “If I could deny you the permission (to go to your other wives) I would not allow your favour to be bestowed on any other person.”<ref>[http://www.searchtruth.com/book_display.php?book=60&translator=1&start=307&number=307/ Bukhari 6:60:312.]</ref> One night when Muhammad left Aisha’s room, she assumed he had gone to visit one of the others out of turn. She was so angry that she tore up his clothes. When he returned to find his cloak unwearable,<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 115.</ref> he asked: “Aisha, what has happened to you? Do you feel jealous?” She retorted: “How can it be (that a woman like me) should not feel jealous in regard to a husband like you?”<ref>{{Muslim|39|6759}}.</ref> On another night when he departed before dawn, Aisha sent Barira to follow him; but Barira reported that Muhammad had only gone to the graveyard to perform a prayer-ritual.<ref>{{Muwatta|16|16|57}}.</ref> Only a few days before Muhammad died, he asked Aisha, “Would it distress you to die before me so that I might wrap you in your shroud and pray over you and bury you?” She replied, “Methinks I see you if you had done that returning to my house and spending a bridal night therein with one of your wives.” He smiled but he did not deny it;<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 678-679.</ref> for his newest bride, a princess whom he had never met, was at that moment journeying towards Medina.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 138-139}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 105.</ref>

Some Muslims, especially Shi’a, hold up Aisha’s “jealousy” as an example ''not'' to be followed. “She was absolutely consumed by jealousy throughout her whole life, and jealousy is a major sin. I don’t know why such a person should be considered to be a great saint, when many ordinary women are able to rid themselves of this disease.”<ref>Haydar Husayn on [http://www.shiachat.com/forum/index.php?/topic/234992525-why-aisha-is-a-bad-woman/ ''Why Aisha is a Bad Woman''].</ref> This attempt to label Aisha as “selfish” for wanting a normal monogamous marriage deflects the blame for the conflict away from Muhammad the “[[Uswa Hasana|perfect man]]”. Once the focus is returned to Muhammad, it is obvious that he showed very imperfect judgment about the nature of marriage. He claimed to be a prophet in the line of the Jews, and they did not find polygyny acceptable.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 143. “When the Jews saw Allah’s Messenger marrying women, they said, ‘Look at this person who is not satisfied by food. By God, he is only interested in women!’ They envied him because of the number of his wives and they criticised him for that, saying, ‘If he had been a prophet, he would not have desired women.’” Although the Mosaic law had originally tolerated polygyny, this had been over two thousand years before the time of Muhammad, and it was apparently an archaism to the Jews of Medina.</ref> While it is true that polygyny was normal for the pagans, Muhammad was claiming to know better than they did. The same pagans also practised polyandry, and Muhammad had enough insight to forbid this.<ref>Watt, W. M. (1956). ''Muhammad at Medina'', pp. 277-280. Oxford: Oxford University Press.</ref> He also knew that polygyny hurt women. When his son-in-law Ali considered taking a second wife, Muhammad preached from the pulpit that he forbade it because “what hurts Fatima hurts me.”<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|157}}.</ref> If he did not forbid polygyny for everyone, beginning with himself, it was essentially because he wanted this form of [[adultery]] to be legal. The South African theologian John Gilchrist believes: “Ayishah … may have been his favourite wife but her grievances clearly were motivated … by the fact that she was not his ''only'' wife … Ayishah’s expressions of jealousy are perhaps the best judgment that can be passed on the whole defence that polygamy is justified where all the wives are treated equally.”<ref>[http://www.bible.ca/islam/library/Gilchrist/Vol1/2c.html/ Gilchrist, J. (1986). “The Circumstances of his Marriages,” pp. 77-90, in ''Muhammad and the Religion of Islam''. Benoni, South Africa: Jesus to the Muslims.]</ref>

===Military Violence===

Aisha once asked Muhammad, “Shouldn’t we [women] participate in holy battles and ''Jihad'' along with you?" He replied, "The best and the most superior ''Jihad'' (for women) is ''[[Hajj]]''.”<ref>{{Bukhari|3|29|84}}.</ref> Despite this disapproval of a woman’s direct participation in war, Muhammad nevertheless expected Aisha to contribute to the ''jihad'' effort.

She was only eleven years old when he took her as an auxiliary to the Battle of Uhud. With her skirts hitched up to expose her ankle-bangles were visible, she hurried back and forth between pouring water into the mouths of the warriors and refilling her water skin, while the bulk of the Muslim army fled, leaving Muhammad exposed to the enemy’s arrows.<ref>{{Bukhari|4|52|131}}. This ''hadith'' was narrated by the eyewitness Anas ibn Malik, who was then thirteen years old and presumably also an auxiliary.</ref> An auxiliary’s other battle-duties included nursing the injured, helping to dig graves<ref>{{Tabari|12|p. 107}}.</ref> and finishing off the enemy wounded.<ref>{{Tabari|12|pp. 127, 146}}.</ref> Arabs did not deliberately attack non-combatants,<ref>See the surprise of the Muslims in {{Bukhari|4|52|256}} and {{Muslim|19|4321}} when Muhammad said it did not matter if their night-raid resulted in the collateral deaths of women and children, for “they are from them.” Abu Bakr was clearly closer to the culturally normative warfare-ethics when he instructed his general not to harm women, children, elders, invalids, animals, trees or buildings ({{Muwatta|21|3|10}}).</ref> but an auxiliary might have been harmed in the cross-fire. When Muhammad’s cousin Umm Sulaym bint Milhan served as a battle-auxiliary, she strapped a dagger to her waist so that “if one of the idol-worshippers comes near me, I will slit open his stomach.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 278.</ref> While it is not stated that Umm Sulaym ever needed to carry out her threat, her precaution shows that the danger to non-combatants was real. Muhammad did not allow boys to fight before they were fifteen years old,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|423}}.</ref> but Aisha had to serve like a woman at eleven.

Two years later, Muhammad took Aisha to the Battle of the Trench. This was much less dangerous, for the “battle” was a stalemate siege with little actual fighting.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 454, 469.</ref> Aisha’s services were only required by night, when Muhammad was guarding a potential breach point along the trench in very cold weather. From time to time “he would come to Aisha, who would warm him in her embrace, and he would return to guarding the trench.”<ref>Waqidi, ''Al-Maghazi'' Vol. 1 p. 463.</ref> Since there was nothing that she could actively contribute to this campaign, it seems an unnecessary hardship to have imposed on a thirteen-year-old.

The following month, Muhammad captured the [[The Genocide of Banu Qurayza|Qurayza]], the last Jewish tribe living in Medina, and ordered that every adult male should be decapitated. Muhammad personally supervised the executions in Medina Market.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 464; {{Tabari|8|pp. 40-41}}.</ref> Aisha did not directly witness the killings but she was within earshot. She chatted to a woman named Bunanah, who was “laughing immoderately as the Apostle was killing her men in the market when suddenly an unseen voice called her name. ‘Good Heavens,’ I cried, ‘what is the matter?’ ‘I am to be killed,’ she replied. ‘What for?’ I asked. ‘Because of something I did,’ she answered. She was taken away and beheaded .... I shall never forget my wonder at her good spirits and her loud laughter when all the time she knew that she would be killed.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 464-465.</ref> Bunanah’s offence had been to participate in the Jewish defence by throwing a millstone onto the assailants, which had crushed a Muslim warrior to death.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 711; {{Tabari|8|p. 41}}. Bunanah was doubtless inspired by the example in Judges 9:53, a story that every Jewish child knows.</ref> That day an Aws chief named Saad ibn Muaz died of a battle-injury, and Muhammad, though “his eye did not weep for anyone,”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 40}}.</ref> announced that Allah’s throne had shaken when the doors of Paradise were flung open for him.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 468. This was the Saad ibn Muaz who had just pronounced the death-sentence on the men of Qurayza.</ref> Soon afterwards, Aisha was with Saad’s kinsman, Abu Yahya ibn Hudayr, when the news arrived that the latter’s wife had died. He “showed considerable grief.” Aisha exclaimed: “God forgive you, O Abu Yahya! Will you grieve over a woman when you have lost [your second cousin twice removed], for whom the throne shook?”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 468. The genealogies in Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 204, 330 show that the patrilinear great-grandfather of Saad had been the great-great-great-grandfather of Abu Yahya (Usayd ibn Hudayr). It is possible, of course, that they were more closely related than this in one of the female lines.</ref> Her surprise over Abu Yahya’s attachment to his wife betrays much about her own experience of marriage.

In 628 Aisha’s full brother Abdulrahman finally became a Muslim and emigrated to Medina. He reminded Abu Bakr: “Thou wert exposed as a mark to me on the day of Badr, but I turned away from thee and did not slay thee.” Abu Bakr replied, “As to thee, hadst ''thou'' come before ''me'', I should not have turned away from thee.”<ref>As-Suyuti, ''Tarikh al-Khulafa''. Translated by Jarrett, H. S. (1881). ''The History of the Caliphs'', p. 35. Calcutta: Asiatic Society. See also [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1618&Itemid=114/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q58:22].</ref>

===The Necklace Affair===

====The Lost Necklace====

While travelling home from a raid in January 628, Aisha, then aged fourteen, lost an onyx<ref>{{Abudawud|1|0320}} describes it as “onyx of Zafar,” i.e., bought at Zafar Market in Yemen.</ref> necklace that she had borrowed from her sister. While she was searching for it away from the camp, the caravan accidentally departed without her, and she was left stranded in the desert for several hours. Eventually she was discovered by a young warrior, Safwan ibn Muattal, who “had fallen behind the main body for some purpose and had not spent the night with the troops.” He gave her a lift on his camel to the army’s next halt.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 494; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> Gossip spread around the camp that Aisha and her rescuer must have committed adultery.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref>

Aisha was not aware of the rumours. She felt sick when they arrived in Medina and took to her bed immediately.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> She was aware during her illness that Muhammad was not paying his usual attention to her comfort; but she knew that he had just acquired a new bride (this brought the total to seven)<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 493.</ref> and that he was busy with plans to visit Mecca,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 499.</ref> so she did not connect his coolness with her own behaviour.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> She moved into her parents’ house so that Umm Ruman could nurse her. It was three weeks before she was well enough to speak to anyone outside the family and discovered that she was accused of infidelity.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref>

There is no evidence that Aisha was actually guilty, for there were no witnesses. In fact she was still pre-menarcheal,<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|805}}; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}.</ref> so it is unlikely that she found sex a pleasurable activity. She also knew the penalty for the transgression, for she had witnessed the stoning to death of adulterers.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 266-267; {{Bukhari|8|82|809}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|79}}; {{Bukhari|4|56|829}}.</ref> To accuse Aisha of adultery was therefore to question not only her virtue but also her intelligence. Besides, the whole army had witnessed that she had already lost the necklace in a separate incident just the previous day,<ref>{{Bukhari|1|7|330}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|177}}; {{Bukhari|8|82|827}}; {{Bukhari|8|82|828}}; {{Abudawud|1|320}}.</ref> so there is no reason to doubt that it did have an unreliable clasp. A modern Western law-court would certainly acquit her on the principle of “innocent until proved guilty”. A historian, however, can only assert that nobody ''knows'' what happened that night.

====The Accusers====

The more interesting question is why Aisha was even accused. Four people who were not eyewitnesses and apparently had little in common with one another formed a spontaneous alliance to speculate on Aisha’s guilt and smear her character.

#'''Mistah ibn Uthatha''' was a poor relation of Abu Bakr’s,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 495, 497; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}. His maternal grandmother was Abu Bakr’s maternal aunt, i.e., he was Aisha’s second cousin. Both his parents were the second cousins of Muhammad’s father.</ref> and his mother cursed him for attacking their patron’s daughter.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> It is not at all obvious why Mistah might have accused Aisha, but as they had always lived at close quarters, he might well have had some personal reason, justified or otherwise, to resent her.
#'''Hassan ibn Thabit''' was Muhammad’s poet;<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 497; {{Bukhari|5|59|366}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|466}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|467}}.</ref> his usual job was to satirise Muhammad’s political enemies.<ref>{{Bukhari|4|56|731}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|449}}.</ref> It is not known whether he had had any previous dealings with Aisha, but a tabloid editor makes it his business to publish scandals.
#'''Abdullah ibn Ubayy''' was the most powerful chief in Medina.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 205-206, 277-278.</ref> “The people propagated the slander and discussed it in his presence, and he confirmed it and listened to it and asked about it to let it prevail.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> It would have been more fitting for a leader among the people to forbid such idle tales, yet “it is said that the one who carried most of the slander was Abdullah.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> He had an obvious political interest in the situation. Six years earlier, he had been elected King of Medina; but before he could be crowned, a dissident faction had announced their support for the prophet from Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 277-278.</ref> Abdullah had at first cooperated with the Muslims and had even instructed his own partisans to support Muhammad rather than fight over the leadership of the city.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 278, 391.</ref> But he came to regret the way he had helped the immigrants. After his intercession for the lives of his friends the Qaynuqa<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 363-364.</ref> and his refusal to fight his Meccan allies at Uhud,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 372.</ref> Muhammad had labelled him the “head of the hypocrites”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 245-246; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> By 628 Abdullah must have hoped that the Muslims would quarrel among themselves so that Islam would crumble from within. While there is no evidence that he had any personal grudge against Aisha, he seems to have been quite willing to sacrifice her to his political agenda.
#'''Hamnah bint Jahsh''' had not travelled with the army, so she must have first heard the gossip after they returned to Medina. “She spread the report far and wide.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495.</ref> Hamnah was the sister of another of Muhammad’s wives; she hoped that Aisha’s downfall would pave the way for her sister to become the favourite wife.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> Aisha did not mention that Hamnah also had a more personal stake in the situation. Hamnah’s husband, Talhah ibn Ubaydullah,<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 170.</ref> had expressed a desire to marry Aisha when Muhammad died.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 142.</ref> Muhammad had responded with a revelation that his widows were never to remarry,<ref>{{Quran|33|53}}; [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1835&Itemid=89/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:53].</ref> but Hamnah cannot have relished the news that her husband had his eye on a pretty and politically important girl much younger than herself.
The slanderers included “along with others about whom I have no knowledge, but they were a group.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref>

====Community Reaction====

On hearing of the accusations, Aisha became sick again.<ref>{{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> “I kept on weeping that night till dawn. I could neither stop weeping nor sleep … I wept for two nights and a day with my tears never ceasing and I could never sleep till I thought that my liver would burst from weeping.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> Her mother told her not to take it so seriously because people always gossiped about a beautiful woman whose husband loved her.<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}; Guillaume/Ishaq p. 495.</ref> Umm Ruman’s downplaying of the gossip might have been sensible in pagan Mecca; but in Muslim Medina, it was an evasion of the reality. Adultery was a capital offence; Aisha had no witnesses; the culture had no clear understanding of the “innocent until proved guilty” principle; and if Aisha were put to death, or even divorced quietly, her whole family would be disgraced alongside her.

Muhammad apparently did not think of defeating the gossip by ignoring it and making a public show of loyalty and affection to Aisha. His coolness to her continued for the month of her illness.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 495, 496; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> Nor did he call for a formal trial where the evidence could be publicly assessed. Instead, he consulted his son-in-law, Ali, and his adoptive grandson, Usama ibn Zayd, about whether he should divorce Aisha. Usama spoke highly of her: “They are your family, and we and you know only good of them, and this is a lie and a falsehood.” Ali advised: “Women are plentiful, and you can easily change one for another. Ask the slave-girl, for she will tell you the truth.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 496; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}. Actually this is an error, probably by the translator rather than by Ali, for Barira was no longer a slave.</ref> Muhammad called Barira, then sat without protest while Ali “gave her a violent beating” for information. But no matter how he demanded, the worst story that Barira could produce against her mistress was that Aisha had once fallen asleep when she was supposed to be watching the rising dough, and so the pet lamb had eaten it (doubtless a hungry memory).<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 496; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|3|48|805}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> Aisha never forgave Ali for this suggestion that her life, marriage and honour were less important than how foolish gossip might reflect on Muhammad. For the rest of her life, she avoided speaking Ali’s name and never had a good word for him.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 679; {{Tabari|9|p. 170}}.</ref>

Muhammad then addressed the whole community in the mosque: “Who will relieve me from that man who has hurt me with his evil statement about my family?”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}. This is the sequence of events in Muslim and Bukhari; but Ibn Ishaq (Guillaume pp. 495-496) says that Muhammad challenged the people in the mosque first and consulted with Ali and Usama second. Aisha only heard about the brawl in the mosque after the event and therefore might not have known exactly when it happened.</ref> As this was Muhammad’s usual formula when he was requesting an [[Assassination and Murder|assassination]],<ref>Cf Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 367, 675, 676.</ref> an Aws chief immediately volunteered to behead the culprit. A Khazraj rival, in protesting this course of action, only confirmed that the culprit was indeed a Khazraji (i.e., Abdullah ibn Ubayy). The two tribes “were flared up until they were about to fall upon one another”<ref>{{Muslim|37|6673}}</ref> while Muhammad was still standing in the pulpit, but he managed to calm them down.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 495-496; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> It was clearly not practicable to kill a man as powerful as Abdullah.

====Vindication====

So Muhammad finally went to Aisha and asked her directly if she was guilty. She waited for her parents to protest her innocence, then asked why they did not speak in her defence. They replied that they did not know what to say.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 496; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}};{{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> Aisha responded, “Never will I repent towards Allah of what you mention! By Allah, I know that if I were to confess to what men say of me, Allah knowing that I am innocent of it, I should admit what did not happen; and if I denied what they said, you would not believe me. My duty is to show becoming patience, and Allah’s aid is to be asked against what you describe.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 496; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref>

At this point, Muhammad had to announce Allah’s decision. He immediately went into the trance of revelation and sweat dropped off his brow like “water on a winter day”. Then he announced: “Good news, Aisha! Allah has sent down [a revelation] about your innocence.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 497.</ref> Umm Ruman told Aisha to thank her husband, suggesting that she knew Allah’s real identity; but Aisha (possibly annoyed that Muhammad had taken a month to make up his mind) replied, “No, I praise none but Allah.”<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref>

Muhammad went out to the courtyard and recited the new revelation to the people:<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 497; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> “''Why then, did not the believers, men and women, when you heard it (the slander) think good of their own people and say: "This (charge) is an obvious lie?" Why did they not produce four witnesses? Since they (the slanderers) have not produced witnesses! Then with Allah they are the liars.''”<ref>''Ayat'' 12 & 13 of {{Quran-range|24|4|26}}.</ref> This excused Aisha even had she happened to be guilty, since she only had three and a half witnesses against her.<ref>{{Quran-range|24|11|20}}; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|274}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|281}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> Hamnah only counted as a half-witness because she was a woman: “''And get two witnesses out of your own men. And if there are not two men (available), then a man and two women, such as you agree for witnesses, so that if one of them (two women) errs, the other can remind her..''”<ref>{{Quran|2|282}}.</ref>

====The Penalty====

As soon as Muhammad descended from the pulpit, he sentenced Hamnah, Hassan and Mistah to eighty lashes each.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 497; {{Abudawud|38|4459}}. This was according to the new revelation in {{Quran|24|4}}: “''And those who accuse chaste women, and produce not four witnesses, flog them with eighty stripes.''”</ref> The aristocratic Abdullah was not lashed.<ref>His name is conspicuously absent from Ibn Ishaq’s account of the punishment. [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=2439&Itemid=79/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q24:14] says: “As for the hypocrites who indulged in the slander, such as Abdullah bin Ubayy bin Salul and his like … the threats that were narrated for a specific deed are bound to be carried out, if there is no repentance or sufficient righteous deeds to balance or outweigh it,” i.e., Abdullah was to be all the more punished in the Hereafter.</ref> The flogging apparently replaced the adultery accusations as the current affair of common conversation, for nobody remembered who originally composed the lines: “''Hassan, Hamnah and Mistah tasted what they deserved for uttering unseemly slander; They slandered with ill-founded accusations their prophet’s wife; they angered the Lord of the glorious throne and were chastised. They injured Allah’s apostle through her and were made a public and lasting disgrace. Lashes rained upon them like raindrops falling from the highest clouds.''”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 499.</ref>

It is difficult to assess the exact severity of this punishment because it is not known what kind of implement was used or with how much force the blows fell. Eighty lashes can be enough to kill,<ref>For example, in 2011 Hena Akhterv died after seventy blows from a bamboo cane. [http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2011/feb/03/bangladeshi-girl-100-lashes/ Karim, F. “Bangladeshi girl, 14, dies after receiving 100 lashes” in ''The Guardian'', Friday 4 February 2011.]</ref> though Hamnah, Hassan and Mistah all survived. Any kind of flogging, of course, seems an exaggerated retribution for mere gossip because, while slander is always hurtful and unpleasant, in most situations it does not amount to a plot against a person’s life. In this case, however, that is exactly what had happened: Hamnah, Hassan and Mistah were essentially being punished for an attempted murder. The real problem lay in the rigid system that not only killed adulterers but forced women in particular to take an unrealistic level of responsibility for never being suspected.

In the light of his punitive attitude to adultery, Muhammad’s own behaviour is ironic. On the same night when Aisha was alone in the desert, with nobody to verify whether she was searching for a lost necklace or meeting a lover, there were seven hundred witnesses who had seen Muhammad take yet another new bride into his tent.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 629; Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Tabari|39|pp. 182-183}}; {{Abudawud|29|3920}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 83.</ref> But these witnesses never accused him of adultery. The Prophet was not required to be faithful to a woman.

As a sad aside, it was only three months after this scandal concluded that Aisha’s mother died.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 193.</ref>

After the Necklace Affair, the lottery that determined which wife would accompany Muhammad to the wars never again fell on Aisha.<ref>This is the calculation of [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life4/chap24.htm/ Muir (1861)], vol. 4 p. 114 f 3. Sir William does not comment on whether this observation might be anything more than a coincidence.</ref> Although she helped him pack his military equipment early in 630, she admitted to her father that she did not know where the troops were going.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 544.</ref> In fact Muhammad took them to conquer Mecca, where he proclaimed that anyone who did not convert to Islam would be killed.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 552-554; {{Quran|9|5}}.</ref> At this point, Aisha’s grandfather Abu Quhafah finally became a Muslim; he was ninety years old.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 548-549.</ref> Soon afterwards Abu Bakr took as his fourth wife Asma bint Umays, the widow of a prominent ''jihad'' “martyr”. She bore his third son, Muhammad, in 632.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 197. “Abu Bakr ''as-Siddiq'' married Asma bint Umays after Jaafar ibn Abi Talib died and she bore him Muhammad ibn Abi Bakr … at Dhu’l-Hulayfa when they were intending to make the Farewell ''Hajj''.”</ref>

===Domestic Violence===

Aisha once claimed: “The Messenger of Allah never [[Wife Beating|struck]] a woman or a servant with his hand.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 143; see also {{Muslim|30|5756}}.</ref> This restraint would be sufficiently explained by Muhammad’s twenty-five years as the husband of Khadijah, for he would surely not have dared to strike her. In fact “never” was an exaggeration, for Aisha herself had a contrary memory. One night Muhammad arose from her bed, and she quietly followed him. Probably she assumed he had gone to visit another woman. As it happened, he only went to the nearby graveyard to perform a prayer-ritual, so she ran home before he could realise she had been spying on him. Unfortunately, Muhammad had spotted her, and he asked what she had been doing out at night. When she denied that she had left the house, he hit her chest “which caused me pain.”<ref>{{Muslim|4|2127}}.</ref>

If Aisha remembered Muhammad as a man who ''almost'' never beat her, she was probably comparing him with her father. Abu Bakr continued to discipline his married daughter. The first time Aisha lost her sister’s necklace, Muhammad indulgently held up the whole army to search for it (it turned out that a camel was sitting on it), and the men complained to Abu Bakr about the wasted time. That night, as Muhammad slept with his head in Aisha’s lap, Abu Bakr rebuked his daughter and punched her thigh with a “very painful” blow. She kept still so as not to awaken Muhammad.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|7|330}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|177}}; {{Bukhari|8|82|827}}; {{Bukhari|8|82|828}}.</ref> It is nowhere recorded that Aisha complained to Muhammad or that Abu Bakr suffered any kind of rebuke or consequence for this attack.

During one quarrel between Aisha and Muhammad, Abu Bakr walked in. Muhammad asked, “Abu Bakr, will you obtain my right from Aisha?”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 56.</ref> Aisha said, “You talk [first] but say only the truth.” Abu Bakr said, “O enemy of yourself, does he utter anything but the truth?”<ref>[http://www.ghazali.org/books/marriage.pdf/ Ghazali, ''Iḥyaa uloom al-Deen'' vol. 2 chapter 2. Translated by Farah, M. “Book on the Etiquette of Marriage,” p. 95, in ''The Revival of the Religious Sciences''.]</ref> In one version of the story, he “raised his hand and struck her hard on the chest.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 56.</ref> In an alternative version, “he struck her until her mouth bled.”<ref>[http://www.ghazali.org/books/marriage.pdf/ Farah/Ghazali vol. 2 p. 95].</ref> Muhammad said, “May Allah forgive you, Abu Bakr, I did not mean this!”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 56.</ref> But in neither version of the story did Muhammad require Abu Bakr to apologise to Aisha, let alone to undergo any of the violent [[Qur'an, Hadith and Scholars:Punishments|punishments]] that he imposed on a slanderer, a thief or an adulterer.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4981}} also reports a variant.</ref>

How common was domestic violence in the Muslim community? There were doubtless families where it never happened. When Habibah bint Zayd disobeyed her husband, Saad ibn Al-Rabi, and he slapped her face, her father and brother complained to Muhammad.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/AsbabAlnuzol.asp?SoraName=4&Ayah=34&search=yes&img=A/ Al-Wahidi, ''Asbab Al-Nuzul''. Translated by Guezzou, M. (2011). ''Context of Revelation'', Q4:34. Amman, Jordan: Royal Aal al-Bayt Institute for Islamic Thought.]</ref> The spouses were cousins, and the objecting brother was Saad’s stepfather,<ref>See the genealogies in Guillaume/Ishaq p. 402 and Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 243, 245. Kharijah ibn Zayd married his cousin’s widow Huzaylah, and his sister Habibah married their cousin’s son Saad. It was the daughter of Kharijah and Huzaylah, another Habibah, who had married Abu Bakr. The latter frankly admitted that he beat his young wife ({{Muslim|9|3506}}) – but he only said this after Kharijah and Saad had both been killed at the battle of Uhud and buried in a common grave.</ref> so even within one family, there was no consensus over what was culturally normal. Muhammad advised, “Retaliation! Retaliation! And there is no other judgement to be held.”<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/asbabalnuzol.asp?soraname=4&ayah=34&search=yes&img=a&languageid=2/ Guezzou/Wahidi Q4:34.]</ref> He then announced to the community, “Do not beat Allah’s handmaidens,”<ref>{{Abudawud|11|2141}}.</ref> and “they stopped beating them.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 144.</ref> The word “stopped” indicates that there were other families where it had been normal to beat wives (and daughters, sisters and servants, since a “handmaiden” was not necessarily a “wife”). The respite did not last long. Umar, who was “rough and ready,”<ref>{{Tabari|14|pp. 102}}</ref> who habitually carried a whip<ref>{{Tabari|14|pp. 115, 138-139}}.</ref> and “when he beat, he brought pain,”<ref>{{Tabari|14|p. 120}}</ref> told Muhammad, “Women have become emboldened towards their husbands.” So Muhammad “gave permission to beat them”<ref>{{Abudawud|11|2141}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 144.</ref> with the new revelation: “As for those from whom ye fear rebellion, admonish them and banish them to beds apart, and scourge them.''”<ref>{{Quran|4|34}}: Pickthall. Some English translations add the word “lightly”, presumably inferred from the wording of Muhammad’s Farewell Sermon in Ibn Ishaq; but this is not in the original Arabic of the Qur’an.</ref> Muhammad explained his change in policy to the family of Habibah bint Zayd thus: “'We wanted something and my Lord wanted something different.”<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/AsbabAlnuzol.asp?SoraName=4&Ayah=34&search=yes&img=A/ Guezzou/Wahidi Q4:34.]</ref> Muhammad was the community leader, and he had demonstrated that his credit was so high that he actually had the power to control what happened behind closed doors and reduce domestic violence. Despite this, he nevertheless felt the need to overlook it. He must have realised that it was practised by too high a proportion of the warriors on whose loyalty he depended. Keeping these men onside was a higher priority than the safety of the women.

After the new revelation, “in the night seventy women came to the family of Muhammad, all of whom complained about their husbands.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 144.</ref> If they came by night, they could not have felt safe to complain in the open. Muhammad warned that, “They are not the best among you,”<ref>{{Abudawud|11|2141}}. The word “they” is masculine. Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 144 renders the same speech as: “Beat them, but only the worst of you will beat them.”</ref> but he took no further action. Elsewhere he also warned that women who complained about their husbands were likely to go to Hell.<ref>E.g., {{Bukhari|7|62|125}}: “Then I saw the (Hell) Fire, and I have never before, seen such a horrible sight as that, and I saw that the majority of its dwellers were women ... Because of their ungratefulness ... They are not thankful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favours done to them. Even if you do good to one of them all your life, when she seems some harshness from you, she will say, ‘I have never seen any good from you.’” See also {{Bukhari|1|6|301}} and {{Bukhari|2|18|161}}.</ref>

Aisha was a close observer of two sad cases, although she was not able to help either woman. Tamima bint Wahb came to her because she knew how “it was the habit of ladies to support each other.” Her face had such a bruise from her husband’s beatings that Aisha observed: “I have not seen any woman suffering as much as the believing women. Look! Her skin is greener than her clothes!”<ref>{{Bukhari|7|72|715}}.</ref> Muhammad took no interest in Tamima’s bruises; he only attended to determining why her marriage had apparently never been consummated.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|72|715}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 295. See also Jarrett/Suyuti pp. 102-103, according to which, Tamima appealed again for a divorce after her marriage had been consummated, then again after Abu Bakr became Caliph, and yet again in the time of Umar. But the divorce was never granted.</ref> He had no recorded reaction to the remark that pagans treated their wives better than Muslims did. Aisha was also aware of the unhappiness of her sister Asma, who was married to Muhammad’s cousin<ref>{{Tabari|39p. 105}}.</ref> Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam.<ref>Al-Zubayr was also the nephew of Khadijah ({{Tabari|39|p. 27}}); he was one of the earliest converts to Islam (Guillaume/Ishaq p. 115); he emigrated to Abyssinia (Guillaume/Ishaq p. 147); he fought at Badr (Guillaume/Ishaq p. 328) and Uhud (Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 373, 375, 381); he tortured Kinana ibn Al-Rabi at Khaybar (Guillaume/Ishaq p. 515); and Muhammad declared him to be one of the ten who were promised Paradise ({{Abudawud|40|4632}}; Tirmidhi 3747). There could hardly have been a more prominent Muslim.</ref> Asma complained that Al-Zubayr had tied her and her co-wife together by their hair and beaten both of them “severely”.<ref>Qurtubi, ''Tafsir'' on Q4:34.</ref> Abu Bakr advised Asma that Al-Zubayr was a “righteous” man, and therefore she should not leave him, or even remarry after his death, because her reward for her patience would be to be reunited with him in the Garden (Paradise).<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 177.</ref> Al-Zubayr usually had four wives at a time. “Whenever he reprimanded one of us, he would break off a branch from the wooden clothes hangers and beat her with it until he broke it over her.”<ref>Al-Zamakhshari, ''The Revealer'' vol. 2 p. 71.</ref> One wife tricked him into divorcing her after only a few months because of his “harshness”;<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 163.</ref> but it was only after twenty-odd years and eight children that Al-Zubayr finally divorced Asma.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 176, 179.</ref>

In fact, there is no evidence that Muhammad believed that it was ''intrinsically'' wrong for a man to strike a woman, child or subordinate. He only cautioned that wife-beating must be for some reason, in which case Allah “permits you to shut them in separate rooms and to beat them, but not severely … Treat women well, for they are domestic animals with you and do not possess anything for themselves.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 113}}.</ref> Nor did he enlarge on what he meant by “not severely,” but he apparently permitted something more than a sharp slap, for he advised: “Hang your whip where the members of the household can see it, for that will discipline them.”<ref>Al-Tabarani, ''Al-Mujam'' 10:248. A similar ''hadith'' is recorded in Al-Zamakhshari, ''The Revealer'' vol. 1, p. 525: “Hang up your scourge where your wife can see it.”</ref> He confirmed a man’s right to do as he liked in the privacy of his home: “A man will not be asked why he beat his wife.”<ref>{{Abudawud|11|2142}}. This ''hadith'' was transmitted to posterity by Umar.</ref> Muhammad said that his two favourite friends were Abu Bakr and Umar,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|57|14}}.</ref> and he was always saying, “‘I, Abu Bakr and Umar were (somewhere)’ or ‘did something’ or ‘set out.’”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|57|26}}.</ref> He appointed Abu Bakr as his successor,<ref>{{Bukhari|9|89|324}}.</ref> and nobody was surprised when Umar succeeded Abu Bakr.<ref>[http://answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Caliphate/chap11.htm/ Muir, W. (1924). ''The Caliphate: its Rise, Decline, and Fall from Original Sources'', 2nd Ed., pp. 77, 78, 82. Edinburgh: John Grant.]</ref> Umar was so violent that even the dying Abu Bakr advised him, “Temper severity with mildness.”<ref>[http://answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Caliphate/chap11.htm/ Muir (1924), p. 78.]</ref> Yet it does not seem to have crossed Muhammad’s mind that his friends’ violence rendered them unfit for leadership.

Later generations of Muslims have often inferred from all this that, although Muhammad discouraged wife-beating, he was setting a standard that was too difficult for ordinary Muslims. A 2013 study by Dr Lateefa Latif found that nearly half of Saudi women were being beaten by their husbands, fathers, brothers and even their sons, who used their hands, sticks, head-covers and sharp objects.<ref>[http://www.emirates247.com/crime/region/nearly-half-saudi-women-are-beaten-at-home-2013-02-26-1.496510/ “Nearly half Saudi women are beaten at home”] in ''Emirates 24/7'', 26 February 2013.</ref> Leaders of six Swedish mosques in 2012 advised beaten wives not to report their husbands to the police.<ref>[http://www.thelocal.se/40866/20120516/ Mosques’ advice: ‘don’t report abusive husbands’]. ''The Local'', 16 May 2012.</ref>

===Islam===

Aisha hung a curtain decorated with winged horses and birds<ref>Nasa’i vol. 6 p. 182 #5354, #5355.</ref> in front of a cupboard. Muhammad pulled it down, complaining that it distracted him from his prayers. But when Aisha sewed the curtain into two cushions, he did not object to sitting on these.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|371}}; {{Bukhari|3|43|659}}; Nasa’i vol. 6 pp. 182-186 #5356, #5357 #5358, #5359.</ref> Another day he stood at her door with a “sign of disgust on his face”. She asked what she had done wrong, and he replied, “What about this cushion?” It was decorated with pictures. She said that she had bought it especially for him “to sit and recline on.” He told her: “The painters of these pictures will be punished on the Day of Resurrection ... The angels do not enter a house where there are pictures.”<ref>{{Bukhari|3|34|318}}.</ref> But Muhammad did not object to “a plush wrap, with a border on it, that we would wear.”<ref>Nasa’i vol. 6 p. 182 #5355.</ref> He forbade musical instruments,<ref>{{Bukhari|7|69|494v}}.</ref> especially bells<ref>{{Muslim|24|5279}}.</ref> and singing,<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4090}}.</ref> yet when Aisha arranged a wedding party, he admonished her for not providing singers “for the ''Ansar'' are a people who give a place to love songs.”<ref>[http://www.oocities.org/tirmidhihadith/page6.html/ Tirmidhi 3154, 3155.]</ref> When Aisha refused to admit her foster-mother’s brother-in-law to her house, Muhammad said that she should have let him in “for he is your paternal uncle.” Aisha pointed out that it was the woman, not her husband, who had breast-fed her, but Muhammad explained that her foster-mother’s husband was still considered like a father to her.<ref>Nasa’i vol. 4 p. 144 #3315; p. 145 #3317.</ref> Yet when he found Aisha sitting unveiled with her foster-brother, presumably a younger man, he showed anger and warned her, “Be careful whom you count as your brothers.”<ref> Nasa’i vol. 4 p. 143 #3314.</ref> No matter how obscure the rules, no matter how complex the list of exceptions to the rules, ''hadith'' after ''hadith'' shows that Aisha tried to comply.

Despite this, there is no real evidence that Aisha “believed” Islam in the sense of giving intellectual assent to the literal existence of Allah. On the contrary, she expressed her scepticism to Muhammad’s face. When he told her that Allah had given him permission to reject or accept as many as he liked of the women who offered to marry him, with no need to pay a dower,<ref>{{Quran|33|51}}.</ref> she responded, “I feel that your Lord hastens in fulfilling your wishes and desires!”<ref>[http://www.searchtruth.com/book_display.php?book=60&translator=1&start=307&number=307/ Bukhari 6:60:311.] See also {{Muslim|8|3453}}; {{Muslim|8|3454}}.</ref> When she was accused of infidelity, she wept night and day as long as she feared Muhammad might divorce her. But when he finally spoke to her directly about the accusations, he did not mention the usual punishment for adultery but only said, “Fear Allah, and if you have done wrong as men say, then repent towards Allah, for he accepts repentance from his slaves.” At this hint that Muhammad intended to exonerate her, “my tears ceased, and I could not feel them.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 496; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> Muhammad immediately entered the prophetic trance to hear Allah’s verdict, and “I felt no fear or alarm … [but] as for my parents … I thought that they would die from fear.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 497; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> Aisha was not afraid of Allah because she already knew that Muhammad had decided in her favour – that is, she knew who Allah really was. In one quarrel she told her husband directly: “You are the one who ''claims'' to be the Prophet of Allah!”<ref>[http://www.ghazali.org/books/marriage.pdf/ Farah/Ghazali vol. 2 p. 95.]</ref>

She challenged him on his un-Prophet-like morals too. He had warned her against rudeness and malicious speech, even to people who deserved it.<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|57}}; {{Bukhari|8|73|590}}.</ref> Yet she overheard him so annoyed by the conversation of two visitors that “he invoked curse upon both of them and hurled malediction.” After the visitors had left, she asked him why he had insulted them on such trifling provocation. Muhammad had no back-story on why he had been morally justified. He could only tell Aisha, “I have made condition with my Lord … that for a Muslim upon whom I invoke curse or hurl malediction, [He will] make it a source of purity and reward.”<ref>{{Muslim|32|6285}}.</ref>

Although Aisha claimed to have seen Jibreel, she qualified this. What she actually saw was Muhammad talking just outside her house to a man mounted on a horse. She thought the man was Dihya ibn Khalifa al-Kalbi, but when she asked Muhammad about it, he replied, “You have seen a great blessing. That was Jibreel.” A short time later, Muhammad announced that Jibreel was in the room and that he brought Aisha the greeting of peace. She replied, “Peace be upon him, and the mercy of Allah and his blessings.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 pp. 55, 48.</ref> But when she narrated the story years later, she admitted to her audience, “I did not see [Jibreel]. [Muhammad] used to see what I did not see.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 55.</ref>

Despite her scepticism, Aisha became an expert on Islam. “Whenever Aisha heard anything that she did not understand, she used to ask again till she understood it completely.”<ref>{{Bukhari|1|3|103}}.</ref> She memorised the whole Qur’an.<ref>Ibn Hajar, ''Fath al-Bari'' (''Victory of the Creator'') vol. 7 pp. 82-83.</ref> It was said that nobody had “more knowledge of the ''sunna'' [lifestyle] of the Apostle of Allah than Aisha,” or “better knowledge of the verses [of the Qur’an] as to what they were revealed about.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 2, p. 481.</ref> It was inevitable that she should become a teacher. She even had the clear, carrying voice<ref>{{Tabari|17|p. 65}}.</ref> required for public speaking, and Musa ibn Talhah confirmed, “I have not seen anyone clearer (in speech) than Aisha.”<ref>[http://sunnah.com/tirmidhi/49/ Tirmidhi #3884]; Al-Hakim, ''Musadrak'' vol. 4 p. 11.</ref> From the earliest times, Muslim women clustered around Aisha in the mosque,<ref>Ibn Hajar vol. 7 pp. 82-83.</ref> and Muhammad, who said that, “Some eloquent speech has the fluency of magic,”<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|76}}.</ref> is supposed to have instructed them, “Take half your religion from this little red one.”<ref>Ibn Athir, ''An-Nihayah''. A variant in Ibn Manzur’s ''Kitab al-Firdaus'' is, “Take one-third of your religion from the house of the little red one.” However, the authenticity of these ''ahadith'' is disputed.</ref>

This contradiction between Aisha’s private attitude and Aisha’s visible behaviour is easily explained by her circumstances. She could not escape Islam. Whatever she believed in private, she had to work within the Islamic system, for no other system was available to her. Fourteen centuries later, it is easy for an outsider to recognise that the Islamic system is exactly what has caused the problems of Islamic societies and that these problems will not be solved before the authority of Muhammad is abandoned. But even if Aisha perceived this, she was in no position to say so directly.

===Last Years of Muhammad===

A strange story is told of Muhammad’s latter years. He went through a phase when “he used to think that he had sexual relations with his wives while he actually had not.” This went on until, as he told Aisha, Jibreel brought him a kettle of food. After eating from it, he acquired the sexual prowess of forty men,<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 77.1/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 1 part 2 section 77:1.]</ref> and was able to “visit” all of his wives “in a round, during the day and night.”<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|268}}.</ref> Allah also revealed that his problem had been caused by a Jew named Labid ibn Al-Asam al-Zurayqi, who had acquired a comb containing his hairs and used it to cast a spell on him. But Muhammad never punished Labid because “since Allah cured me, I disliked to let evil spread among the people.”<ref>{{Bukhari|7|71|658}}; {{Bukhari|7|71|660}}; {{Bukhari|7|71|661}}. See also Guillaume/Ishaq p. 240. Note that this Jew was not from any of the three tribes that Muhammad banished from Medina or killed. There were a few Jews in most of Medina’s other tribes.</ref>

Aisha reached menarche at an unknown date after July 628<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}.</ref> though before, and probably long before, March 632.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|6|293}}.</ref> Despite her somewhat late beginning, there is no suggestion that she had a medical problem or that her cycle was other than normal. On the contrary, she discussed the Islamic rules for managing menstruation with a confident frankness that betokened having nothing to hide.<ref>See, for example, {{Bukhari|1|6|293}}, {{Bukhari|1|6|294}}, {{Bukhari|1|6|298}}, {{Bukhari|1|6|305}}, {{Bukhari|1|6|309}}, {{Bukhari|1|6|312}}, {{Bukhari|1|6|316}}, {{Bukhari|1|6|325}}.</ref> She cited other women’s gynaecological problems<ref>{{Bukhari|1|6|303}}; {{Bukhari|1|6|307}}; {{Bukhari|1|6|324}}. The Umm Habibah in this latter ''hadith'' is not Muhammad’s wife but his cousin, the sister of Zaynab bint Jahsh.</ref> but referred to none of her own. There is no reason to assume that Aisha lacked normal fertility – except for the fact that she never became pregnant.<ref>E.g., {{Tabari|39|p. 161}}: “Khadijah was the Prophet’s first wife, and she bore all his children except Ibrahim, son of Mariyah.”</ref> Although this cannot be proved, it is highly likely that Aisha’s failure to conceive was due to Muhammad’s age and behaviour. By the time she was sixteen and presumably fertile, he was nearly sixty; and he had so many other wives that she only received his attentions about once a week. When he was at home in Medina, he allocated Aisha two nights out of every eleven.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|268}}: “His wives … were eleven in number.” Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 123: “He used to allot each of his wives a day and a night except for Sawda who gave her day and night to ‘A’isha.” See also pp. 40, 45, 124.</ref> When he departed for one of his many military campaigns, of course, he did not visit her at all.

Aisha’s childlessness was a matter of some distress to her; she said she longed for a ''kunya'' so that she would be publicly recognised as “Mother of Someone”. Muhammad’s compromise suggestion was that she should call herself ''Umm Abdullah'' after her sister’s son. This ''kunya'' might have been used occasionally<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4952}}; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 46. However, the ''hadith'' literature usually refers to her as “Aisha daughter of Abi Bakr” or “Aisha Mother of the Faithful” or simply “Aisha”.</ref> and it lent her some social dignity, but it did not address the deep sorrow of a woman who is denied maternity. Yet Muhammad made Aisha’s childlessness permanent, and most likely artificially permanent, by forbidding her to remarry after his death.<ref>{{Quran|33|53}}.</ref>

In late February 632 Muhammad and his family set out for Mecca to make his only ''Hajj'' pilgrimage.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 649.</ref> As Aisha and Muhammad made camp one night, Abu Bakr’s slave arrived to confess he had lost the camel carrying all their supplies. Abu Bakr jumped up and began beating the slave, shouting, “You lose a single camel!” Muhammad smiled to see this behaviour from someone in a state of ritual purity.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 145.</ref> Just outside Mecca, Aisha found that she was menstruating and therefore debarred from the ritual of circumambulating the [[Ka'aba]]. She cried and told Muhammad that she wished she had not come on ''Hajj'' at all.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|6|302}}.</ref> He comforted her with the reminder that, “This is a thing which Allah has ordained for the daughters of Adam.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|6|293}}.</ref> You can do all that the pilgrims do except go round the temple.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 649.</ref> He showed the crowds exactly how to perform a correct pilgrimage: where to stand, how to slaughter the animals, how to throw the pebbles at the pillar of Mina, how to walk around the Ka’aba.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 650-651, 652.</ref> Believing that he would never again visit Mecca, he preached a [[Farewell Sermon]] in which he announced that Allah’s will was now completely revealed through himself and the Qur’an. He urged that all Muslims were brothers and must beware of Satan, but the remainder of the historic sermon was decidedly banal: usury was abolished; nobody must steal from a fellow-Muslim; intercalary months were bad; faithful wives must be fed but the “openly unseemly” must be beaten; Allah would not forgive anyone who claimed the wrong father or master.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 651-652.</ref> On 4 March, the Day of Sacrifice, Aisha plaited garlands for Muhammad’s sacrificial animals.<ref>{{Muwatta|20|13|52}}.</ref> A few hours later, she was surprised to receive a large pile of beef, and was told that Muhammad had sacrificed cows on behalf of all his wives.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 649.</ref> He warned them, however, that this ''Hajj'' had been an exception to the general rule; now that they had completed their duty, there would be no more excursions: “It is this, and then confinement.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 146.</ref> When Muhammad departed from Mecca, Aisha remained behind until she was ritually clean, and then her brother Abudulrahman took her to perform the circumambulation of the Ka’aba.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 649-650.</ref> She arrived home in Medina to discover that Muhammad had fallen ill.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 108}}.</ref>

He seemed to recover from his illness, but he relapsed in late May.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 108, 165}}.</ref> He lost track of his wife-roster and kept asking, “Where will I be tomorrow? And where will I be the next day?”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 123.</ref> His wives realised he wanted to be with Aisha and agreed that he would pass his illness in her house.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|144}}; Guillaume/Ishaq p. 679; Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 123.</ref> Muhammad lay for several days with his head in her lap while she recited over and over to him the last two ''suras'' of the Qur’an.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|71|647}}.</ref> She chewed a toothpick for his last teeth-cleaning so that “Allah made my saliva mix with his saliva at his death.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|730}}.</ref> Then she felt him growing heavy in her lap,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 682.</ref> and “he died when no one but me and the angels saw him.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 47</ref> She laid his head on a pillow and arose beating her breast and slapping her cheeks.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq p. 682.</ref>

Muhammad was buried in Aisha’s house.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 46.</ref> His widows respectfully observed the traditional ''idda'' (waiting period) of 130 days, even though they would never be available for remarriage. They visited one another but never left the mosque courtyard and were “out of action until they were like nuns. Not one day or two or three passed by them except that each woman was heard sobbing.”<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 155.</ref> Aisha was eighteen years old<ref>{{Muslim|8|3311}}; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref> and she was to live for another forty-six years.<ref>Bewley/Saad vol. 8 p. 54: “Aisha was buried on the night of Tuesday 17 Ramadan 58 AH.”</ref>

===See Also===

*[[Qur'an, Hadith and Scholars:Aisha]] (''primary and early sources about Aisha'')
*[[Aisha Age of Consummation|Aisha's Age of Consummation]]
*[[Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aishas Age|Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aisha's Age]]
*[[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha]]
*[[Aisha and Puberty]]
*[[A Refutation of 'The Islamophobe's Glass House']]
*[[Rejecting Dr David Lieperts Aisha Was Older Apologetic Myth|Rejecting Dr. David Liepert's "Aisha Was Older" Apologetic Myth]] ''(Essay)''
*[[Islam and Pedophilia]] ''(Core Article)''
*[[Forced Marriage]]
*[[Muhammad's Wives]] (''Hub Page'')
*[[Polygamy]] (''Hub Page'')
*[[Adultery]]
*[[Wife Beating in Islam]]
*[[Aisha (Farsideology)]] (''satire'')

===References===
{{reflist}}

User talk:1234567

2013-07-18T06:32:46Z

1234567:

==Links==
[[User talk:1234567/Archive]]

[[User:1234567|Sandbox]]

==Simon Ockley again==

My Arab friends have given me some help about Simon Ockley's translation of the paedophilia text.
Simon Ockley was translating this text. https://play.google.com/books/reader?id=xLJEAAAAcAAJ&printsec=frontcover&output=reader&authuser=0&hl=en. You can scroll forward to page 23, where you will recognise the words Mohamet, Abu Bakr, Aisha. There is no serious doubt that Ockley has made an accurate translation of Maracci's Latin.
You will see that the Arab scholar was called Abdulrahman al-Hamdani.
My friends say that the title of his book is ''Al-Shabayat''.
They cannot read Latin and I did not tell them what it was about. I just asked them about the sentence of Arabic. They said it means: "He reached out his blessed arm and grabbed her by the clothes."
They were very surprised by this odd sentence. I had to explain to them that it was probably a quote from the book, and the story was about Muhammad and Aisha.
So I think we can fairly say that Maracci did have access to a real book and that he made a fair translation of the story.
Now we must try to find out who the scholar was and when he lived. Perhaps then we can establish the reliability of his narrative.
But there is something about it that rings horribly true. I don't think a Muslim hagiographer would have invented this story.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 05:01, 13 April 2013 (PDT)
:Interesting! Thanks for keeping us posted. [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 11:10, 13 April 2013 (PDT)

==Aisha==

hi 1234567, I'm resetting the indent for my convenience.

I had given you the wrong links for your Sandboxes. I made the right links on your user page now: [[User:1234567]]. What you were working on is Sandbox 1: [[User:1234567/Sandbox 1]]

I feel you enjoy researching and writing about these topics and that's what we want in our editors. Your recent writeup is full of facts as is usually the case and but we have two concerns again with your writing which must be addressed before you do any additional work. The first is serious and needs to be discussed.

Wikipedia has this as a core policy: [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:Verifiability Verifiability]. I'm going to repeat the "nutshell" of their policy page:
:'''''Readers must be able to check that Wikipedia articles are not just made up. This means that all quotations and <u>any material challenged or likely to be challenged must be attributed</u> to a reliable, published source using an inline citation.'''''

For example in your [[User:1234567/Sandbox 1| recent writeup]]:

:''Muhammad told the household of Abu Bakr, without mentioning his reason, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position.” A few days later, Aisha became upset with her mother and complained to her father. Abu Bakr was angry with both of them, and Umm Ruman '''vented''' her annoyance on Aisha. Aisha hid behind the front door to '''sob''' and was in this state of distress when Muhammad, arriving for his daily visit, asked what was wrong. She '''blurted''' out everything''

I bolded three words here (''vented, sob, blurted''). The tone of these words is dramatic/emotional and not suitable for this site. We like writing articles in a style which would be found in a research paper. I want you to understand why we want to write things in a serious/journalistic style. Even though it may read boring it looks better and is more reliable/factual.

Here's the problem. A visitor comes on this site and reads ''"Abu Bakr was angry and Umm Ruman vented"''. He's going to ask "Who is the author who made this claim? '''How do I know this is true?'''". Unless an editor is Bukhari himself, they cannot make such a claim. So we only ''report'' what we find in a verifiable manner. We cannot give the impression of any original research (our own conclusions). We are all anonymous people on the internet so we cannot attempt to tell the reader what we ''think'' (no one cares about that and no wants to know). We can only tell people what we know for sure. This is like you reading a news article about the history of Aisha. You would want to know the facts and the facts only.

This is crucial to understand. Here's another example from the new writeup:
:She was slim and light-framed[31] with a fair, rosy complexion and perhaps also red hair[32] that she wore plaited.[33] '''Time would show that she was confident, spirited, strong-willed and highly intelligent''' – she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah”.

The bolded line would not be acceptable. Its giving the impression of assumptions again. I remember I had brought something like this up before as well ([[User_talk:1234567/Archive#Questions_about_the_Wives_articles|link]]) and I'm a little sad that I'm having to address this again. You have access to great sources and you have a strong interest in these topics and I want your work to be produced in the best way possible. If people see statements like these, this will severely negate all the positives (the references and facts). Mixing facts with opinions also makes it hard for the reader to distinguish between the two. (1) What actually happened. (2) What the author thinks may have happened. Even if what you wrote may be true, we cannot give the impression that the author is making the claim.

Leave out anything that you cannot directly attribute to a source. Make everything easily verifiable. That does mean leaving out speculations. If you have any speculation that is about something very important (Khadija living 15 more years), you can say it like "One may conclude that ...". Here its clear that this is an opinion of the author.

The second concern is making multiple references. Please do not combine references into a single reference. It makes it harder for anyone to verify the information.

To make things easy for you for both these issues, you can just mention the most important parts of a story so you'll have to use less references and do less work. I know you want people to know as much as possible so thats your choice, but in any case we need all opinions to left out, everything to be easily verifiable and no combined references should be used. If there is something that you think might be challenged by Muslims, it is also good to write the relevant part of that quote in the references with italics/quotation marks or provide the entire quote (whatever you think is appropriate). For example <nowiki><ref>''"... Abu Bakar was very upset with Muhammad ..."'' (Bukhari 123:123)</ref></nowiki> Even in essays these two issues must not be present.

One problem is that we don't have time to continuously review and fix the content, so this must change going forward and we need you to understand our approach so any additional work is done according to the guidelines. If these things are not fixed/changed at this time when the material is being compiled, it will be almost impossible to fix it later when there's limited access to the sources.

I think you will understand if you imagine that you are writing a research paper with a serious tone where everything must be referenced. This is actually very simple to do: As you go along, ''only report'' what you see (in a chronological order when possible), reference everything and don't create any opinions or give the impression that an opinion has been created. This is all you need to do.

As for whether you should do the controversial articles first or go in chrono-order, that's up to you how you want to do that. If we had a preference, of course we would like the controversial content first.

Sahabah may have additional thoughts. Let me know if you see any problems or difficulties with what I'm suggesting. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 18:21, 29 April 2013 (PDT)

:I don't have much to add except maybe clarify a few of Axius' points, or at least what I think he meant (Axius will no doubt correct me if I'm wrong).

: About Axius' point concerning assumptions; in essence we're an encyclopedic counter-apologetics site, so things like this are ''great'' (minus the use of the word "absurd"):

{{Quote||It is also suggested that Muhammad “married Aisha for the benefit of Islam and Humanity … From her, 2210 Hadith have come... Many of her transmissions pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behaviour which only someone in Aisha's position could have learnt.”[24] This is absurd. If Muhammad had wanted the traditions about his life to be securely transmitted to posterity, he would not have relied on the hope that his young widow might later think of it; he would have arranged to have them committed to writing during his lifetime. He never did. Further, if he had believed that a wife was the best kind of chronicler, he would have chosen an adult spouse who knew how to write. Aisha could in fact read[25] but she never learned to write.[26]}}

: However, this is not:

{{Quote||Time would show that she was confident, spirited, strong-willed and highly intelligent – she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah”.}}

: And, yes, the use of dramatic/emotional language detracts a lot of the page's impact and makes it harder for an anonymous reader to take seriously. So basically, it shouldn't read like a novel. I know 1234567 is concerned about holding peoples interest, but the 'dry' or 'boring' articles really are what readers are looking for and is certainly what we want. Of course, when I say 'dry' or 'boring', I mean a to-the-point article written in a scholarly, professional tone. I know we must seem like crazy control freaks, and I apologize for that. But people will use any little excuse they can find to dismiss work critical of Islam. Your articles really are great and it would be a shame for them to be dismissed over such easily rectified points. [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 19:40, 29 April 2013 (PDT)

::Okay, what you need to understand is that the article is currently in a very rough state, based on old work that was intended for a more narrative style. I have had to break off my research to earn money for a few days. So I have a skeleton article (information in roughly the right order) but also a lot of references not properly tied to the article and a lot of statements not properly tied to references. You can see this from the number of empty reference boxes. Many of the statements reflect the sort of information that, based on my preliminary reading of the sources, I expect to find, but there just hasn't been time for a sentence-by-sentence breakdown of how I know what I know. Isn't that what sandboxes are for?
::And, yes, I do sometimes find that when I do the breakdown, I have drawn an unwarranted conclusion. It turns out to be based on something I read in a secondary source that wasn't properly linked to a real primary source; or when events are laid out in strict chronological order, it turns out that there is a confusion (mine or someone else's) of cause and effect; or the same minor character has been running through several narratives and reveals himself as a much more major player than anyone realised.

::In the case of the story of Muhammad interfering with Abu Bakr's family, what will be needed will be to tie it more closely to the language of the original hadith, which (in my translation) is: "He found Aisha '''hiding''' behind the door of the house of Abu Bakr, '''weeping''' with great '''distress'''. He questioned her and she '''complained''' about her mother and said that '''she was after her'''." So perhaps she didn't "blurt" but only "told" her complaint; but it was definitely not in neutral tone. The annoying lack of specific detail (what actually ''happened'' in this situation?) is a feature of the original, which may be why this story is often omitted from the standard biographies of Aisha. I think it is interesting, however, to examine her relationship with the parents who soon afterwards handed her over to the paedophile.
::Regarding the description of Aisha as intelligent, high-spirited, etc., this is rather similar to the description of Khadija as "loyal and sympathetic", which I wrote in the middle of my Khadija article. The evidence for these qualities not apparent at this point in the narrative, but it becomes obvious by the end of the story. Now you might want all such descriptors removed or left to a final conclusion, which is fine if that is your policy. But that does leave the reader wondering: What did Jibreel/Muhammad/Khawla mean by claiming that Aisha had "some of the qualities of Khadija"? Intelligence is the one obvious thing that the two had in common, but there were no IQ tests in those days. This seems to be the wrong point to reference every single hadith suggesting that Aisha had a high IQ.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]])

:::Yes, of course that is what sandboxes are for. I'm sure Axius is aware that its content may not reflect what the finished page will look like, but was hoping his early intervention would help you avoid any unnecessary extra work later on. If one editor notices the work of another editor and thinks they're going in the wrong direction, it's only natural to point it out. If their input is not necessary because you already plan on doing what they suggested, then there is no harm.

:::About that family incident. I agree it's interesting. But the point about dramatic/emotional language would still stand. For example, replacing the word "weeping" with "crying" (if the source is quoted in the reference, readers will easily be able to read the original wording by hovering their cursor over the ref number). Or you could simply quote the source by saying, "she was "weeping with great distress"". I understand that Aisha telling Muhammad was not done in a neutral tone, and that your description of events should be accurate. But I think this should be done using the least dramatic language possible, and where there is such language used, it should be within quotation marks and never from the actual author/article.

:::Regarding the description of Aisha. I haven't read the entire article, but just considering that section on its own, I don't think it's necessary to even have that line there. One way that could have been handled without losing any information is by adding a footnote, e.g., "He said the angel Jibril had appeared to him in a dream, holding a veiled child and saying, “Messenger of Allah, this one will remove some of your sorrow. This one has some of the qualities of Khadijah.”<nowiki><ref>Note that Islamic sources generally convey that Khadijah was a confident, enthusiastic, determined and intelligent women.</ref></nowiki> Then he lifted the veil, revealing that the child was Aisha." [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 22:24, 29 April 2013 (PDT)
::::hi 1234567, right, we didnt know the writeup was based on content written earlier. No problem, we'll wait for you to be done.
::::Sahabah is right about the intelligence issue. I'll assume temporarily I'm a critical reader. I would ask questions like: ''"What is the evidence for her being confident, strong-willed and intelligent? How do these qualities compare to those found in other women of that time? Was she exceptional in any way? Did anyone attest to these qualities explicitly? Were there any additional qualities? Maybe it was something else that was being referred to, such as praying habits, seeking the approval of Muhammad and so on"''. etc. You'll realize you're better off leaving these conclusions out.
::::You want to write a complete story but I'm saying having an accurate and reliable story is of primary importance while a secondary issue is of the story being/appearing incomplete. Islamic sources mention only bits and pieces and if we report just those, we've done our job. Its not even necessary to write in conclusions/deductions and fill in any gaps. The facts are powerful enough on their own. So we're looking for statements like these: ''Aisha could in fact read[25] but she never learned to write.[26]''. They are directly referenced facts and have their own references (not combined). Here's a useful policy ([http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:No_original_research Wikipedia:No original research]), another of their core policies and I'll only mention the 'nutshell':
:::::''Wikipedia does not publish original thought: all material in Wikipedia must be attributable to a reliable, published source. Articles '''may not contain any new analysis or synthesis''' of published material that serves to advance a position '''not clearly advanced by the sources themselves'''.''
::::He's also right about the 'weeping' issue. For example when newspapers report what people are saying, they use exact quotes. Usage of the actual words is better than using your own words even if you think the new words describe it better.
::::I feel I've not done a complete job of explaining but hopefully this should help. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 09:39, 30 April 2013 (PDT)
hi 1234567, welcome back. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 04:02, 17 May 2013 (PDT)

== Article comments ==

hi 1234567, I have some comments for [[User:1234567/Sandbox 1]] and [[User:1234567/Sandbox 2]]. I'm assuming they're more or less complete. I didnt want you to be doing any more work on them but I thought I should ask first to see if you're done. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 17:35, 20 June 2013 (PDT)

:Sandbox 1 I still want to check some references.
:Sandbox 2 is more or less complete but doesn't stand on its own.
:There are so many references that the software will not support them as a single article.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 19:26, 20 June 2013 (PDT)
::Ok. Let me know when you're done and I'll compile my thoughts about the things I had noticed. Its ok to have them divided right now. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 20:37, 20 June 2013 (PDT)
:::The biggest problem is still Ockley/Maracci. We're going to look really, really stupid if we include it and it turns out to be some sixteenth-century fantasy. On the other hand, if it's genuine, I'd still like to include it in the article. I can't find any trace online of an Abdulrahman al-Hamdani or an Abdulrahman ibn Hamdan who wrote the appropriate book. That doesn't mean he doesn't exist; it more likely means that he's out of favour with modern scholars and was never cited by anyone who wrote in English.
:::My Arab friends are searching for him in Arabic. They have come on board with helping me and are saying that it's "really important to tell everyone the truth about Muhammad." But I don't want to harass them. They have busy lives and they don't have a background in history; I have to give them clues about where to look.
:::Meanwhile, a few other things need tidying, but I can afford to cut them out if I can't find the information easily.
::::Ok. I think if you cant find the sources right now easily, it will be fine if you can leave those things out and put them in a "to do" list to deal with when you do find the sources. I'll wait for you to be done and then talk about the things that are of concern (in Sandbox 1 and 2) --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 06:16, 22 June 2013 (PDT)
:::::I think I have now referenced everything that I can reference and cut out everything (minus Maracci) that I cannot; and I have toned down the writing style to something more encyclopaedic. Perhaps it's now at the stage where it's easier for you to look at it before I do any more.
:::::I will keep Maracci on my "to do" list, because I do have confidence that we will solve the puzzle one way or another eventually.
:::::If there is something that you just want to cut out, it's probably easiest if you simply cut it. I have kept a copy of the article the way I want it for my own writing, so it doesn't bother me to lose anything from the Wikiislam version.
:::::If the facts are in dispute, you can ask about it. If I've made an unwarranted assumption, I'll cut it. If you need a fuller version of the reference I used to prove my point, I can provide it. But I'm actually worried about cut-and-pasting great slabs of translated material: we'll soon be verging on breach of copyright.
:::::If you just want to change a word here or there, it's probably easier for you to do it yourself than enter a great debate about it. This is a wiki, so nobody can claim sole authorship. But if you want me to rewrite a whole paragraph, it's probably easier if you explain what you want so that I can do it myself.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 04:50, 23 June 2013 (PDT)
::::::Ok. I'll compile the comments and let you know here and we'll see what to do next. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 07:10, 23 June 2013 (PDT)

(outdent) hi 1234567, here are some comments. I'll just mention a few first so we can sort those first before moving to other issues.

1. I know you're dealing with a challenge of creating a story from old/archaic english or incomplete stories (missing information) but we cannot change things in quotes. Here's an example. If a source quoted John saying "The apple is red and falling". I cannot re-write that and change that quote in any way. People expect quotes to be accurate and exact (this is why they're called quotations). So I could not re-write that and quote John saying "The apple is red as blood and its falling while succumbing to gravity".

Quoting the following from the start of [[User:1234567/Sandbox_2]]:
:Co-Wives
:Aisha was jealous of the deceased Khadijah. She complained to Muhammad: “Khadijah is always on your mind, and you speak as if she were the only woman in the world! Why do you still think of that toothless old woman who is long dead, when Allah has given you someone better to replace her?” Muhammad retorted, “No, I have never had a better wife than Khadijah!”[1] Perhaps Aisha would not have minded about Khadijah if she had not also had to compete with living co-wives.
The sources mentioned are:
: Sahih Bukhari 5:58:164; Sahih Bukhari 5:58:165; Sahih Bukhari 5:58:166; Sahih Bukhari 5:58:168; Sahih Bukhari 7:62:156; Sahih Bukhari 8:73:33; Sahih Bukhari 9:93:576; Sahih Muslim 31:5971; Sahih Muslim 31:5972; Sahih Muslim 31:5974; Sahih Muslim 31:5976.
The two sources that may be talking about this are:
:Narrated 'Aisha: Once Hala bint Khuwailid, Khadija's sister, asked the permission of the Prophet to enter. On that, the Prophet remembered the way Khadija used to ask permission, and that upset him. He said, "O Allah! Hala!" So I became jealous and said, '''"What makes you remember an old woman amongst the old women of Quraish an old woman (with a teethless mouth) of red gums who died long ago, and in whose place Allah has given you somebody better than her?"''' ([http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/hadith/bukhari/058-sbt.php#005.058.168])

and:
:A'isha reported that Hala b. Khuwailid (sister of Khadija) sought permission from Allah's Messenger (may peace be upon him) to see him and he was reminded of Khadija's (manner of) asking leave to enter and (was overwhelmed) with emotions thereby and said: O Allah, it is Hala, daughter of Khuwailid, and I felt jealous and said: '''Why do you remember one of those old women of the Quraish with gums red and who is long dead-while Allah has given you a better one in her stead?''' ([http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/hadith/muslim/031-smt.php#031.5976])

The quote you that had does not match with the sources. So Aisha did not say anything like this to Muhammad: "Why do you still think of that toothless old woman who is long dead". No source has Aisha saying exactly that sentence. We cant change quotes. Brackets are sometimes used in Islamic sources but they are actually often insertions by translators (e.g. how some translators add the word 'lightly' while translating {{Quran|4|34}}). This is why the other source did not have those brackets.

The better way to do this would be to quote the source as it is:
: "Why do you remember one of those old women of the Quraish with gums red and who is long dead-while Allah has given you a better one in her stead?" (this sentence is used in the source)

As I said I understand your challenge of using these sources to create something readable but quotes cant be changed.

So that whole quote of Aisha is a synthesis. It is not what she said. Its a re-write and since its in quotes, the reader thinks this is exactly what she said in Arabic but thats not the case.

Continuing: According to Islamic sources, Muhammad's response to that quote was:
:I did not feel jealous of any of the wives of the Prophet as much as I did of Khadija though I did not see her, but the Prophet used to mention her very often, and when ever he slaughtered a sheep, he would cut its parts and send them to the women friends of Khadija. When I sometimes said to him, "(You treat Khadija in such a way) as if there is no woman on earth except Khadija," he would say, "Khadija was such-and-such, and from her I had children." ([http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/hadith/bukhari/058-sbt.php#005.058.166])

But according to you, his response was:
:Muhammad retorted, “No, I have never had a better wife than Khadijah!”[1] Perhaps Aisha would not have minded about Khadijah if she had not also had to compete with living co-wives.

That quote ("I have never had a better wife than Khadijah") is not present in any of the sources.

I have not heard of anyone saying its ok to re-write quotes this is why me and Sahabah were surprised when we saw this. For a website like ours where everything is scrutinized with a microscope, we cannot do anything like that. So as it is, this changing of quotes is not acceptable for our site. I know you havent done this intentionally. You really wanted to write something that the reader finds interesting, but to maintain integrity, accuracy and quality we have to be careful in how or what we write. If it was a short story we were writing or a script for a movie about Islam, it would be another issue.

This is just one issue and its very worrying because of the quantity of work you have done. Here's another example. You wrote:
:At one stage he announced a revelation from Allah that he must not marry any more women “no matter how beautiful.”[3]
This exact quote is not found in the Quran and the link you used was [http://www.usc.edu/org/cmje/religious-texts/quran/verses/033-qmt.php#033.052]. The Quran cannot be paraphrased.

So its this re-writing, re-arranging, paraphrasing original quotes that is worrying.

Another example:
:But the revelation is of no great importance, for “Allah lifted the restriction stated in this ayah and permitted him to marry more women … Aisha said, ‘Allah’s Messenger did not die until all women were permitted to him.’”[4]

The reference given actually says:
:Then Allah lifted the restriction stated in this Ayah and permitted him to marry more women, but he did not marry anyone else, so that the favor of the Messenger of Allah towards them would be clear. Imam Ahmad recorded that `A'ishah, may Allah be pleased with her, said: "The Messenger of Allah did not die until Allah permitted (marriage to other) women for him.''

So you have changed the quote. "All women" is not the same as "other women".

I want to try our best to save your content. As I've said before many times there's a lot of good information you have gathered from these sources and this kind of work has possibly not been done by anyone. You have showed a lot of passion and interest in this topic and we love that. But these issues need to be addressed before content like this is acceptable for the site.

2. Minor issue (#1 above is the real problem): Image of stoning is not appropriate here: [[User:1234567/Sandbox_2]] and will need to be removed. This was something we'd talked about before. (for one, caption doesn't mention Aisha and its relation to the page. It does make the page appealing and I understand your attempt but we use images only if directly relevant)

For #1, I feel its a serious problem. There are many other instances where we saw this happening and some of them we cant even check because we don't have the sources and we haven't looked at everything because of the quantity of the content. I'm honestly not sure what can be done other than going back to the sources and making sure its all OK. What is also sad that we had talked about this before ([http://wikiislam.net/wiki/User_talk:1234567/Archive] where I said how we must only quote the sources e.g. "assumptions, deductions, opinions, things that are not present directly in a text", "we make sure the reader knows that this was an actual quote") and now the same problems exist and we have new content that is not right.

The only solution is go through the content and make sure quotes are exact and if they are not, they have to be carefully/neutrally worded. For example we would write "Muhammad replied" instead of "Muhammad retorted" (another issue that we had talked about before on the old talk page: [[User_talk:1234567/Archive]]). But again I feel this solution is difficult because of the amount of content and the common occurrence of the problem. Sahabah saw these problems and I agreed with him (that we cannot change quotes in any way. Again see my example of John in the beginning). Let me know what you think. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 18:52, 26 June 2013 (PDT)
:Let us also know if you have any feedback or suggestions for the site, if anything can be improved and so on. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 19:10, 3 July 2013 (PDT)
::Okay, if that is the main issue, that is what I will do.
::Thanks for explaining site policy. The truth is, we are dealing with translated material. I know quite a lot about translation (because I speak three languages, though not Arabic) and I find that for most purposes, a dynamic equivalent is better than a literal translation. Literal translation, especially of idioms, often obscures the real meaning. For example, the "woman of red gums" is a "toothless woman", i.e., an old one. We just don't express the idea that way in natural English. An Arab would not understand our equivalent expression, "She's over the hill." In fact there are many English translations of the hadiths, not all of which are literal and hardly any of which are expressed in elegant English; but some are definitely more comprehensible than others. (This is quite aside from whether the translation attempt was an honest one, e.g., Yusuf Ali on Q4:34). To be scrupulously honest, we should in fact name the translation as well as the source, and this information is not always available.
::But if you would rather keep it literal, I can copy out the exact translation word for word in each case.
::"I never had a better wife than Khadijah" is definitely in one of the sources; I did not invent it, and I'm fairly sure it was not invented by a secondary historian either. I'm sorry if I missed it in the versions I quoted; I'll hunt it out.
::I have cleared the decks from other commitments, so I can now spend a couple of days tidying up the citations in the Aisha article. The article about Zaynab bint Jahsh is also nearly finished.
::And I have stumbled across a few new hadiths that I can use to correct my previous articles. Amazing what you find when you're looking for something else.
::I don't have a specific suggestion for improving the site overall, but whenever I find anything that might interest you, I'll post it on the appropriate Talk page.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 22:05, 13 July 2013 (PDT)

:::'''"The truth is, we are dealing with translated material. I know quite a lot about translation (because I speak three languages, though not Arabic) and I find that for most purposes, a dynamic equivalent is better than a literal translation."'''
:::Surely you're aware that paraphrasing sources and presenting them as direct quotes from translations (by the use of inverted commas) is wrong? It's simply not the done thing.

:::Sites critical of Islam mainly have 3 accusations hurled at them: 1) they're biased. 2) they're run by bigoted right-wingers with an axe to grind. 3) their criticism is built on fabricated sources and taking things out of context.

:::The first two don't bother us because they're ad hominem (plus, we don't do politics, so the second incorrect accusation isn't even worth entertaining). However, the third accusation is something we take very seriously. We've managed to avoid such accusations by being very stringent with what we allow onto the site.

:::Speak to anyone with experience in debating Muslims or writing articles critiquing Islam and they will tell you that paraphrasing sources will lead to the accusation of fabricating sources. And to be honest, there wouldn't be a defense for it. More worryingly, you seem to go further than simply paraphrasing the text.

:::You appear to be merging several hadith into one, and the conclusions you reach from your reinterpretation of sources are at times not supported by the sources. You did agree to quote the relevant text for all sources in reference tags, but have failed to do so. We do this to make it easier for readers to check sources onsite (rather than have to go offsite via an external link or have to buy hard copies of sources). This would also help us and future editors to verify the accuracy of articles.

:::I really think it is very important for an editor who wants to improve, to fully understand what the problems are. If you would like me to go more in-depth with the problems I see, please say so, and I will. Anyhow, I'm glad you are willing to make corrections.

:::'''"Literal translation, especially of idioms, often obscures the real meaning. For example, the "woman of red gums" is a "toothless woman", i.e., an old one. We just don't express the idea that way in natural English."'''

:::True. But this could have been explained without paraphrasing quotations. To anyone who reads your quotations, then checks the actual sources, it would appear that you are exaggerating what the sources say in order to help support your claims and for added dramatic effect. That's not good.

:::'''"To be scrupulously honest, we should in fact name the translation as well as the source, and this information is not always available."'''

:::There may be exceptions, but we usually do. All of of our Qur'an and several of the major hadith collections have this information available. If you click on the left side of each reference, it will take you to it: {{Quran|4|1}} or {{Bukhari|4|55|548}}. We also have the same for Tabari (you have to click on the right side for that): {{Tabari|1|p. 273}}. The important thing is that they're from ''published'' translations. Not ones that we made up. They have to be translations that Muslims would use without a problem. [[User:Sahabah|--Sahabah]] ([[User talk:Sahabah|talk]]) 00:47, 14 July 2013 (PDT)
::::hi 1234567, to confirm what Sahabah said: regardless of the reasons you gave (as I said I understand your challenge of using these old sources. Its a difficult task), quotes cannot be shown as quotes when they were in fact modified or paraphrased. I don't remember seeing this happen anywhere else. It could be a script for a movie or play but it wouldn't be suitable for us. I've not written much on the site but when I have, my one and only concern is that it should be something that is irrefutable. It must be linked to a good source and it must say what the source says. Of secondary importance are things like: is it readable, does it look good, does it flow well, etc. So the paraphrasing of quotes is a critical issue. No new content should be added without dealing with these existing issues. One solution that makes it easier is for you to keep the story short and only mention important details. Another is not to use quotes and only use them when you have to. Even if you don't use quotes, writing should still be "irrefutable" and accurately reflect the source.
::::You haven't responded to the fact that you paraphrased the Quran and you showed a Quranic verse in quotes when that is not what it said. I have never even seen Muslims do something like that, because they will use another author's translation rather than creating their own. If we create things in quotes and give the impression that thats whats the Quran said, we are creating our own translation. Its not just for the Quran but everything else as well.
::::I don't think its possible to write anything for our site without first understanding the approach we take which is accuracy and reliability first, and everything else comes later. Again, you are doing a difficult task which is to use all of these sources but the first test our pages have to pass is the "defense" stage and that has to be kept in mind constantly for a site like ours. So paraphrasing quotes creates a big problem. I know this can be dealt with. I think the first step is to make a list of possible articles that may need to fixed and then tackle them one by one. You could tell us how you would deal with this. For example you have to use the sources, you cant modify quotes, you can write things without quotes but they still have to reflect what the source says. Sources referenced must be distinct so everything can be verified easily. The more you do these things the higher the reliability is and presenting things in quotes that are not in the original source cannot be done no matter what.
::::We're like a newspaper. Suppose there was this line in the newspaper: 'Jennifer said her husband was ''"buying a lot of things"'' '
::::Readers will assume that that is exactly what she said. If the newspaper had in fact paraphrased Jennifer she actually said ''"shopping at the speed of $1000 dollars an hour"'', this would be a problem and Jennifer wouldnt be happy and the readers would stop trusting the newspaper. Its a problem and to me its a very obvious problem (like I said I've never seen it happen anywhere else). I've taken a quote, modified it, and presented it in quotes -- giving the impression that whats there in the quotes is what was actually said when thats not the case. If I have to paraphrase, I have to stop using quotes and even then it has to accurately reflect what was said.
::::Once again, if quotes can be modified, we cannot tell the difference between what was actually said and what was not. I know these are big problems because its not just a few paragraphs. Its a lot of content. We're already busy in a lot of things and I dont know if we have enough time to help you extensively with this so its all up to you basically. But again, we cannot have content on the site where quotes have been paraphrased and presented as quotes when they are not quotes. I did some searching ([https://www.google.com/search?q=paraphrasing+quotation+marks&spell=1&sa=X&ei=X7niUdmqCfiq4AOxi4GgAg&ved=0CCsQvwUoAA&biw=1920&bih=852 Google]). Here's a good link about the use of quotation marks: [http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/577/01/]. It says "Indirect quotations are not exact wordings but rather rephrasings or summaries of another person's words. In this case, ''it is not necessary to use quotation marks''." (section heading: Indirect Quotations). It also says "Many writers struggle with when to use direct quotations versus indirect quotations. Use the following tips to guide you in your choice."
::::Here's someone responding to a similar issue on Yahoo answers ([http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20100325064701AA8iaJ7 Do you use quotations when paraphrasing?]):
:::::''you don't use quotation marks. in text citations will do (an example of which is parenthetical citation). just make sure to give credit to your sources. '''you only use quotation marks when using DIRECT quotations, meaning everything is copied from the source in verbatim'''.''
::::Additional links: [http://writing.wisc.edu/Handbook/QPA_paraphrase2.html How to paraphrase a source]. This has a section on ''"Paraphrasing difficult texts"''. This following source [http://rwc.hunter.cuny.edu/reading-writing/on-line/qpp.html] has a section on "Too many direct quotations". Here's another [http://www.sscnet.ucla.edu/polisci/faculty/anderson/quotation.htm] which says: ''"When you paraphrase, you must entirely reword material taken from a source, '''without using quotation marks'''".'' Another Q/A: [http://wiki.answers.com/Q/Does_a_paraphrase_have_quotation_marks Does a paraphrase have quotation marks?].
::::So the steps here are to first settle this paraphrasing quotes issue and you can look other sources to see what they say and how to deal with the problem of writing content while using multiple sources, how and when to paraphrase and when/how to use direct quotations and so on. You will see they're saying the same thing we have been saying: You cant paraphrase things and present them in quotation marks.
:::: It may also be helpful to visit [https://www.google.com/search?site=&source=hp&q=writing+forum&oq=writing+forum&gs_l=hp.3..0l10.396.1786.0.2119.13.10.0.3.3.0.115.910.6j4.10.0....0...1c.1.19.hp.FqpVvPciBYg writing forums] and ask them about the challenge of writing things from old texts like these, and how to deal with the issue of paraphrasing and direct quotations while making sure everything remains accurate and matches the source and does not misrepresent or misquote. Also how to write in a journalistic style with no embellishment or decoration and so on. It would be helpful to look at these external links and talk to people who can give advice so you'll get opinions from other people as well. The steps are understanding what the problem is, and what caused things to be in this state, eliminating those approaches and changing course. --[[User:Axius|Axius]] ([[User talk:Axius|talk]]) 06:57, 14 July 2013 (PDT)
::::: Okay, I have now given exact cut-and-paste wording for everything I quoted. In my professional opinion, we are dealing with low-quality translation a lot of the time (I can tell by comparing different translations and noting the poor English expression). Sticking to only one person's translation causes some sacrifice of accuracy in meaning, but if you are willing to live with that, it's your call.
::::: A couple of the quotes are not readily available in English. You noticed the one about "I never had a better wife than Khadijah," which was in fact on my list of references to check, so I must have noted earlier that I still didn't have a source for that. The source is Ibn Hanbal. On the positive side, that means it can't possibly be Shi'a propaganda but is an acceptable Sunni citation. Ibn Hanbal's quote continues in the same way as the versions found in Bukhari and Muslim. On the negative side, I'm having to take an educated guess as to which of the English translations of the sentence scattered over the web is likely to be closest (most likely the one that offers least clarity in English!). I've asked my Arab friends to check what the original says so that we can make a good translation together.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 23:32, 17 July 2013 (PDT)

Muhammad's Marriages

2013-07-15T06:29:31Z

1234567: /* Sawdah bint Zamaa */ Found the hadith; got rid of the secondary source.

This article analyzes the often-asserted claim that most of Prophet [[Muhammad]]’s [[Muhammad's Wives|wives]] were poor widows whom he [[marriage|married]] to save from a life of destitution.

==Introduction==

{{Quote|Ali, M. M. (1924, 1993). ''Muhammad the Prophet'', pp. 192-193. Columbus, Ohio: The Ahmadiyya Anjuman Isha’at Islam Lahore.|The perpetual state of war created disparity between the male and female elements of society. Husbands having fallen on the field of battle, their widows had to be provided for … This is the reason that [Muhammad] himself took so many women to be his wives during the period when war was raging. Nearly all of his wives were widows.}}

{{Quote|Abdallati, H. ''Islam in Focus'', pp. 177-179.|Wars and persecution burdened the Muslims with many widows, orphans and divorcees. They had to be protected and maintained by the surviving Muslim men … One course of relief was to take them as his own wives and accept the challenge of heavy liabilities.}}

People who assert that Muhammad “married poor widows” do not include [[Khadijah]] or [[Aisha]]. Everyone agrees that “Khadijah was a merchant woman of dignity and wealth”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> who eventually expended all that wealth on maintaining [[Islam]].<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118.</ref> It is also agreed that Aisha, beside being a spinster,<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> was the daughter of “a man of means,”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 223.</ref> “a merchant of high character” with “experience in commerce.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 114.</ref> She already had a fiancé at the time of Muhammad’s proposal, and her father had to break off this engagement before marrying her to Muhammad,<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> so she was certainly not looking to Muhammad to take care of her.

As for Muhammad’s other wives, it is true that most of them were widowed, divorced or both. Only [[Mariyah the Sex Slave of the Holy Prophet|Mariyah]],<ref>{{Tabari|39|193-195}}; {{Tabari|9|pp. 137, 141}}.</ref> Mulaykah<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 187}}.</ref> and Fatima<ref>{{Tabari|9|136-139}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 186-188}}.</ref> are not recorded as previously married.<ref>Since so little is known about these women, it cannot be asserted that they were ''not'' widows. We only state here that no previous marriages are ''recorded''.</ref>

Whether these widows were “poor” depends on how one defines poverty. Is a slave poor, even though she serves in the household of the wealthy, because she has no legal rights? Is a Bedouin poor, even though she eats every day, because she has few material possessions? Is a victim of a theft considered poor if she was wealthy before the thief came? However personally poor a widow might be, does she qualify as “destitute” if she has living relatives who can guarantee that they will take care of her? When the question is whether these widows needed Muhammad to support them, we also need to know whether Muhammad had enough wealth to be ''able'' to support these women.

==Analysis==

===Sawdah bint Zamaa===

Muhammad married Sawdah in May 620.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 170}}.</ref> It is not known how Muhammad was making his living in his last few years in Mecca, but he does not seem to have been able to re-launch Khadijah’s merchant business. If it is true that ''all'' of Khadijah’s wealth had been expended in the days of the blockade,<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118.</ref> Muhammad was now bankrupt. He certainly did not seem to have any resources of his own by the time of the ''Hijra'' in September 622: all the expenses of his journey were paid by Abu Bakr.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 223</ref>

By contrast, Sawdah was a tanner<ref>An-Nasa’i vol. 5 #4245</ref> and a perfume-mixer.<ref>[http://www.alim.org/library/hadith/TIR/927/ Tirmidhi 927.]</ref> So she was not in penury; she had the means to earn her own living. Nor was she alone, for she lived with her father and brother.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 130}}.</ref> It is not stated that they were wealthy, but they were respectable. Sawdah also had a son, Abdulrahman ibn Sakhran,<ref>Zarqani 2:260 states that he was killed at the Battle of Jalula in 637. If Sawda was born c. 580, she could easily have given birth to a son before 600.</ref> who is never mentioned as being part of Muhammad’s household. This suggests that by 620 he was an adult who did not need to move in with his new stepfather if he preferred to remain with his blood-relations; therefore he was also old enough to work to contribute to the family expenses. Sawdah’s father approved of her marriage to Muhammad, but her brother did not. Sawdah and Muhammad took care to finalize their union on a day when her brother was out of town; when he returned home and heard the news, he poured dust on his head.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 130}}.</ref> It seems he would rather have taken financial responsibility for his sister for the rest of his life than seen her married to his enemy.

So Sawdah had no economic need to marry Muhammad. On the contrary, it seems that he rather than she was the one who gained financially from this marriage.

As a general commentary on the social problems in the Muslim community, it should be noted that at this early date, the Muslims had not fought a single battle. No Muslim “died in the wars” before the [[Islam Undressed: The Battle of Badr|Battle of Badr]] in 624,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 289ff.</ref> an event that nobody could have foreseen in 620. In fact the only Muslim who had so far died violently was a woman.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 145.</ref> So it is not true that there was a problem with finding enough men to take care of the numerous widows. On the contrary, the gender imbalance appears to have been in the opposite direction. The [[Egypt|Egyptian]] scholar Al-Suyuti compares different traditions about Umar’s conversion in 616: “He embraced the faith early — after the conversion of 40 men and 10 women — or as some say, after 39 men and 23 women, and others, 45 men and 11 women.”<ref>Al-Suyuti, ''Tarikh al-Khulafa''. Translation by Jarrett, H. S. (1881). ''History of the Caliphs'', p. 112. Caclutta: The Asiatic Society.</ref> In fact all these numbers are wrong, for [[Ibn Ishaq]]’s [[Lists|list]] of Muslims who emigrated to Abyssinia in 615 includes 83 men and 18 women.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 146-148.</ref> His list of Muslims converted by Abu Bakr has 41 men and 9 women.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115-117.</ref> One consistency among all these lists, however, is that the early Muslims seemed to comprise ''far'' more men than women, probably twice as many. Besides, many of the Muslim women whose names are missing from these early lists<ref>There is no mention of Khadijah and her daughters, nor of Umm Ruman, nor of the numerous sisters of Lubabah bint Al-Harith ({{Tabari|39|p. 201}}).</ref> were married to [[Paganism|pagan]] men; so even if they had been “numerous” (although they probably were not), they would not have been part of any problem of “homeless widows”.

Therefore the issue of how to provide for single women would not have been on Muhammad’s mind in 620. Rather, the problem was how to find anyone at all who was available to marry him. Even as the leader of the community, he apparently had to take anyone whom he could get. The problem of finding wives for the rank and file of Muslim bachelors is reflected by the reality that Muslims were permitted to marry polytheists right up to the year 628.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 509-510.</ref>

===Hafsah bint Umar===

Hafsah’s first husband, Khunays ibn Hudhayfa, died of battle-wounds in mid-624.<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|342}}. Bewley/Saad 8:56: "He died, leaving her a widow after the ''Hijra'' when the Prophet arrived from Badr."</ref> He seems to have been a man of humble means who relied on the patronage of Hafsah’s father Umar.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 218.</ref> This suggests that his death did not make much change to Hafsah’s economic situation. Before, during and after her marriage, she was dependent on her father. Umar claimed to be “one of the richest of the Quraysh”<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 216.</ref> and he could well afford to keep his daughter.

In addition, Hafsah was one of only four Muslim women in the whole of Medina who knew how to write.<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] There were also eleven Muslim men who could write. The other seven names on Baladhuri’s list are of people who did not convert to Islam until after Hafsah had married Muhammad.</ref> If she had wanted (or been permitted) to set herself up as a career woman, she would have been in demand as a clerk.

By contrast, Muhammad could not afford to keep his wives. Aisha claimed that they never ate bread for more than three successive days, and sometimes the family did not light a fire for a month on end because they had nothing to cook but lived off dates and water.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7085}}; {{Muslim|42|7083}}; {{Muslim|42|7086}}; {{Muslim|42|7084}}; {{Muslim|42|7087}}; {{Muslim|42|7089}}; {{Muslim|42|7092}}; {{Muslim|42|7093}}; {{Muslim|42|7097}}; {{Muslim|42|7098}}.</ref> By marrying Muhammad, Hafsah was accepting a significant cut in her standard of living. In fact Umar later warned her never to ask her husband for money: “If you need something, come and ask me.”<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|119}}.</ref>

Muhammad did not marry Hafsah for her father’s money. He already had complete access to this.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 216.</ref> But nor did he marry her in order to provide for her. He was not able to do this.

===Zaynab bint Khuzayma===

Zaynab’s husband was killed at Badr; he was Ubayda ibn Al-Harith, the first Muslim to die in battle.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 506.</ref> She should have been available for remarriage by late July 624. But she did not marry Muhammad for another seven months.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:82. “He married her in Ramadan at the beginning of the 31st month of the ''Hijra''.”</ref> So she was obviously not starving in that period, and the early Muslim chronicles quickly show us why not.

Zaynab had plenty of family in Medina. At her funeral, just eight months after her wedding, “three of her brothers” were present.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:82.</ref> Her deceased husband Ubayda also had two brothers, Al-Tufayl and Al-Husayn, who had accompanied him to Medina<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 218.</ref> and had fought with him at Badr.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 328.</ref> Further, Zaynab was on good terms with her pagan relatives in Mecca. Her cousin Qubaysa ibn Amr made the journey out to [[Medina]] so that he could arrange her marriage to Muhammad,<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> even though this could have easily been done by one of her brothers in Medina.

Zaynab was from the wealthy Hilal tribe,<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Tabari|9|p. 138}}.</ref> and it seems that her own family had as much money as any of them. This family never stopped supporting her; there was always someone to ensure her subsistence. As we have seen, Muhammad was impecunious and could not afford to feed his wives properly. So whatever Zaynab’s reason for marrying Muhammad, it was certainly not economic necessity.

===Hind (Umm Salama) bint Abi Umayya===

Hind was born into the wealthy Makhzum clan of the Quraysh, and her husband, Abdullah ibn Abdulasad, was a second cousin from the same clan.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 132}}.</ref> Since their family rejected them when they became Muslims,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 169, 170.</ref> it is not clear whether they were still wealthy when, ten years later, they arrived in Medina; but they owned the camels that transported them.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 213-214.</ref>

Abdullah died from battle wounds in November 625.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 175}}; Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Hind wanted to pledge never to remarry so that they might be reunited in Paradise; but the dying Abdullah would not accept the pledge.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:62.</ref> The very fact that Hind believed she would not want to remarry suggests that she was not worried about poverty. It is quite possible that Abdullah had some savings to leave to his widow. She was pregnant,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:66: “When I gave birth to Zaynab, the Messenger of Allah came and proposed to me.” There is some confusion here, as both Hind's daughters appear to have been sometimes known as Zaynab, although the first was originally named Barrah and the second Durrah. Obviously, Hind is here referring to her younger daughter.</ref> so if she needed to generate extra income, perhaps she planned to hire herself out as a wet nurse. However, neither of these options was her main plan.

As soon as Hind was free to remarry (18 March 626)<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> she received a marriage-proposal from Abu Bakr. Then she received a proposal from Umar. Then she received a proposal from Muhammad. She refused all of them. Muhammad then came to visit in person.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> In Hind’s own words: “When my ''idda'' was over, Allah’s Messenger asked to come to see me '''while I was tanning a hide I had. I washed my hands clean of the tanning solution''' and asked him to come in ...”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, cited in Ibn Kathir, ''Al-Sira Al-Nabawiyya''. Translated by Le Gassick T. (2000). ''The Life of the Prophet'', p. 123. Reading, U.K.: Garnet Publishing.</ref> Like Sawdah, Hind was a tanner. Muhammad happened to call on her while she was in the very act of working to support her children, which suggests that she had long since established the routine on which they would all depend.

When Muhammad repeated his marriage-proposal, Hind gave him a string of reasons for why she wanted to refuse, and he left her house disappointed. Muhammad had to argue her out of her excuses and propose a third time before she finally accepted him.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> They were married on or before 6 April 626.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Of course, this raises the question of whether Hind truly wanted to marry Muhammad or whether she simply gave in to the pressure from the most powerful man in the community. Regardless of why she changed her mind, her on-principle reluctance to remarry indicates that she had been managing quite well on her own.

===Zaynab bint Jahsh===

Zaynab bint Jahsh was a career-woman. She was a tanner and leather-worker who was well able to support herself.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:74, 77.</ref> She lived under the protection of her two brothers, Abu Ahmad and Abdullah.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215.</ref> She had no need to remarry unless she chose. It is even said that she proposed marriage to Muhammad and that she offered not to take any dower.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

If this story is true, Muhammad declined the offer. He told Zaynab that she had a “duty” to marry his son Zayd because that was what “Allah and his apostle” wished for her.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}.</ref> At first she refused, supported by her brother Abdullah.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/Tafasir.asp?tMadhNo=1&tTafsirNo=74&tSoraNo=33&tAyahNo=36&tDisplay=yes&UserProfile=0&LanguageId=2/ Jalalayn's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36.]</ref> But Abdullah was killed in the battle of Uhud,<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607.</ref> and at about this time, Zaynab was talked into marrying Zayd.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.</ref> Zayd divorced her within two years, after which, according to Muhammad, Allah commanded her to marry Muhammad himself.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Muhammad’s inability to provide for his growing family was not as serious for Zaynab as for some of his other wives. She continued to work at her leather-crafts after her marriage, and she gave away all her profits in alms.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:74, 77.</ref>

Although it was obvious that Zaynab had no economic need of a new husband, modern historians sometimes claim that she might have had a social or moral need to remarry. They report such claims as, “Before Islam, the Arabs did not allow divorcees to remarry,”<ref>Abdallati, H. ''Islam in Focus'', pp.177-179, cited in “Rebuttal to Sam Shamoun’s Article Muhammad’s Multiplicity of Marriages” in ''Answering Christianity''.</ref> and that her divorce “made her unfit to marry a status conscious Arab.”<ref>[http://www.scribd.com/doc/133159128/The-Real-Men-of-the-Renaissance-Badreddine-Belhamissi/ Aly, A. (1999). ''The Real Men of the Renaissance'', p. 26. Belhamissi.]</ref> This is an imaginary problem. There is no evidence that the Arabs forbade divorced women to remarry. On the contrary, Abu Sufyan’s favourite wife, Hind bint Utbah, had been a divorcée.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:165; Al-Suyuti, ''Tarikh al-Khulafa''. Translated by Jarrett, H. S. (1881). ''History of the Caliphs'', pp. 200-201. Calcutta: The Asiatic Society.</ref> Abu Sufyan's clan, the Umayyads, had been the dominant clan of the Quraysh even before Abu Sufyan became the high chief of Mecca;<ref>E.g., see Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> what was socially acceptable for the Umayyads was, by definition, acceptable for everyone. Muhammad did not marry Zaynab to rescue her from social disapprobation; rather, he created significant social disapprobation in order that he might marry her.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 9}}. "The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, 'Muhammad prohibits (marriage) with the (former) wives of one's own sons, but he married the (former) wife of his son Zayd.'"</ref>

===Rayhanah bint Zayd===

To claim that Muhammad married Rayhanah because she was “a poor widow” is perverse. Rayhanah was a member of the [[Jews|Jewish]] [[Banu Qurayza|Qurayza]] tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 164-165}}.</ref> whom Muhammad besieged in 627. When the tribe surrendered, Muhammad ordered that every adult male should be decapitated, that every woman and child should become his [[Slavery|slave]] and that all the property was forfeit to the Islamic state.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 689-692.</ref> So Rayhanah was only a widow because Muhammad had killed her husband and she was only poor because Muhammad had appropriated her property.

If Muhammad had made enquiries about how to help the Qurayza slaves, he would have quickly realized that Rayhanah was one of the least destitute, for she was only a Quraziya by marriage. By birth she belonged to the Nadir tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 164-165}}.</ref> who were currently residing in the date-farms of Khaybar.<ref> Guillaume/Ishaq 437-438.</ref> If Muhammad had wanted to provide for Rayhanah, he would have sent her back to her own family. The Nadir were making every effort to assist the surviving Qurayza. They searched the Arabian slave-markets and they bought back as many Qurayza women and children as they found there.<ref>Cited in [http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/content/massacre-ban%C5%AB-quray%E1%BA%93-re-examination-tradition?lang=english/ Kister, M. J. (1986). The Massacre of the Banū Qurayẓa: A Re-Examination of a Tradition. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 8'', 61-96.]</ref> Since Rayhanah was a Nadriya by birth, her tribe would certainly have ransomed her too if only she had been for sale.

But Muhammad had selected Rayhanah for himself. She showed “repugnance towards Islam” and refused to marry him, but he kept her as a concubine anyway.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref>

After Muhammad defeated the Qurayza, he was no longer poor<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> and he could afford to keep his family. Although Aisha claims, as noted above, that he never did this very adequately, he had at least in theory the means to support his wives. It is also likely that the Muslim men no longer outnumbered the women, as the acquisition of hundreds of female slaves<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> had redressed the gender imbalance. There is therefore some justification for the claim that, from 627 onwards, Muhammad was in a position to provide a home for the “excess women” who were unable to marry monogamously. What remains to be established, however, is whether or not the particular widows whom he married were the ones who would have been otherwise left destitute.

===Juwayriyah bint Al-Harith===

Juwayriyah was in a similar situation to Rayhanah. She was only a widow because the Muslim raiders had killed her husband.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:83.</ref> Unlike Rayhanah, Juwayriyah was not poor. She knew that the raiders had only carried off a fraction of her tribe’s wealth and that they had only killed a few of the men. Her father, the chief, had survived the raid, and he was willing and able to pay the ransom set on her head.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 739.</ref>

But Muhammad refused to accept the ransom. He gave Juwayriyah the choice of marrying himself or marrying another Muslim.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 629; Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Tabari|39|pp. 182-183}}.</ref>

===Ramlah (Umm Habiba) bint Abi Sufyan===

Ramlah and her first husband, Ubaydullah ibn Jahsh, were among the early [[converts]] to Islam who emigrated to Abyssinia in 615.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 146; {{Tabari|39|p. 177}}.</ref> “They were safely ensconced there and were grateful for the protection of the ''Negus'' [King]; could serve Allah without fear; and the ''Negus'' had shown them every hospitality.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 148.</ref> It is not known how the exiles earned their living, but they must have found a means of subsistence, for they all stayed at least four years. Forty of them returned to Arabia in 619, only to discover that Mecca was still not a safe place for Muslims.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 167-168.</ref> After the Muslim victory at Badr in 624, however, the exiles realized that they would be safe in Medina, and they began to leave for Arabia in small groups.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 527-529.</ref> About half of them remained in Abyssinia, Ramlah and Ubaydullah among them.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 527.</ref> There is no obvious reason why they could not have gone to Medina, where all of Ubaydullah’s siblings lived,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215. Ubaydullah’s eldest brother was married to Ramlah’s sister.</ref> so presumably their continuation in Abyssinia was voluntary.

Ubaydullah died in Abyssinia.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:68.</ref> This should not have made much difference to Ramlah’s economic position. If he had been running some kind of business, she could have taken it over; and if he had had any savings, she would have inherited them. In fact he had been an [[Alcohol|alcoholic]],<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:68: “He gave himself over to drinking wine until he died.”</ref> so it is possible that she had already needed to fend for herself for several years. She had chosen to remain in Abyssinia rather than join her family in Medina, so presumably she could have continued to do whatever she was doing indefinitely. Widowhood now gave her the option of remarriage. There were twelve single men in the community but only four single women, of whom two were elderly, so Ramlah and her teenaged daughter could have easily found suitors had they wished to marry.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 526-527. This list shows that the group also included four married couples and six children under 13.</ref>

Muhammad’s marriage proposal arrived on the day Ramlah completed her 130-day waiting-period.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:68. “When my waiting period came to an end, I was aware of the messenger of the ''Negus'' at the door … She said, ‘The King says to you that the Messenger of Allah has written to him to marry you to him.’”</ref> She was so pleased that she gave her silver bracelets, anklets and rings as gifts to the messenger.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:69.</ref> The ''Negus'' himself hosted the proxy-wedding feast, gave Ramlah presents of perfume and underwrote her dower.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:69.</ref> He appears to have misunderstood how much dower a bride of Ramlah’s station expected, for he gave her 400 ''dinars''<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 133}}.</ref> (about £20,000) when the usual sum was only 400 ''dirhams''<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> (about one-tenth of this). All these details indicate that the ''Negus'' had protected his Muslim guests very well and that they were in no danger of destitution as long as he had his eye on them.

Muhammad must have heard from the returned emigrants about their lives in Abyssinia, so he could not have been under any wrong impression that Ramlah was in need of “rescuing”. In fact, even if she had needed to be rescued, there is no real reason why she would have had to marry Muhammad; she could have simply gone to Medina and lived with her family. Further, if Muhammad had for some reason believed that Ramlah needed to marry, and to marry himself, as a matter of survival, this opens the question of why he did not also propose marriage to the other two widows. They were elderly and of the peasant class,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq pp. 179, 526-528. The details here show that the two ladies had been married to a pair of brothers, i.e. were probably of a similar age. One of them was the older sister of the mother of Ramlah’s foster-mother. Hence she must have been ''at least'' 30 years, and more likely 40 years, older than Ramlah, who was then 35. The family is described as “freed”, i.e. ex-slaves.</ref> but this should not have mattered to someone who did not care about youth, beauty, rank or wealth.

The answer is, of course, that there is no evidence that Muhammad married Ramlah for economic reasons.

===Safiyah bint Huyayy===

[[Safiyah]] was a prisoner of war whom Muhammad captured at the siege of Khaybar.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 511.</ref> She was only a widow because Muhammad had killed [[Kinana|her husband]].<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 515.</ref> She was only poor because Muhammad had appropriated the wealth of Khaybar to himself.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521-523.</ref> However, her poverty had not reached the level of absolute destitution, for many of her relatives were still alive in Khaybar. They had persuaded Muhammad to let them remain on the land and farm the dates in exchange for giving him half the revenues.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 515.</ref> If Safiyah had remained in Khaybar, she too could have farmed dates.

The claim that Safiyah “needed” to marry Muhammad because her high rank meant “it would be inappropriate for her to be assigned to anyone other than the Prophet”<ref>[http://www.ispi-usa.org/muhammad/appendix2.html/ “The Prophet’s Marriages and Wives”] in Akhter, J. (2001). ''The Seven Phases of Prophet Muhammad’s Life''. Chicago: IPSI.</ref> assumes that Safiyah “needed” to be taken prisoner. But Muhammad did not need to take prisoners, even from his own point of view. He had already won the war and taken control of the city. The Jews in Khaybar had no further means to fight back, and Muhammad did not need hostages to ensure their future cooperation.

Once Muhammad had decided that Safiyah was his hostage, he had to feed and shelter her. There was no need to marry her; he had to provide for her material needs regardless. The claim that “this marriage protected her from humiliation”<ref>[http://www.al-islam.org/muhammad-yasin-jibouri/8.htm/ Al-Jibouri, Y. T. “Marriages of the Prophet” in ''Muhammad''. Qum, Iran: Ansariyan Publications.]</ref> shows a strange perception of what is “humiliating”. Safiyah might not have liked to be a domestic slave or a commoner’s concubine, but she surely would have found these options less humiliating than her actual fate of being married to the man who had just killed her husband. Safiyah’s husband was not, as is sometimes claimed, “killed during the battle of Khaybar”;<ref>E.g., [http://www.al-islam.org/muhammad-yasin-jibouri/8.htm/ Jibouri].</ref> he had been personally murdered by Muhammad after the declaration of truce.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 515.</ref>

Muhammad’s family – not only his wives and descendants, but his extended family too – lived off the wealth of Khaybar for the rest of their lives.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521-523.</ref> Since Safiyah represented the leading family of Khaybar,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 437-438.</ref> there is a very real sense in which Muhammad’s whole clan was living at her expense. Muhammad was not providing for Safiyah; it was she who provided for him.

===Maymunah bint Al-Harith===

Maymunah was never poor; she was born into the bourgeois Hilal tribe.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Tabari|9|p. 135}}.</ref> After her husband died, she became the guest of her married sister Lubabah.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:94: “Al-‘Abbas ibn al-Muttalib married her to him. He took care of her affairs.”</ref> Lubabah’s husband was Muhammad’s uncle, Abbas ibn Abdulmuttalib, who was “one of the richest of the Banu Hashim.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 114.</ref> He “used to go often to the Yaman to buy aromatics and sell them during the fairs”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 113.</ref> and was also apparently a banker: “he had a great deal of money scattered among the people.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 309-310.</ref> Maymunah offered to marry Muhammad without taking any dower.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:97: “Maymuna bint al-Harith was the woman who gave herself to the Messenger of Allah.” Also: “‘Amra was asked whether Maymuna was the one who gave herself to the Messenger of Allah. She said, ‘The Messenger of Allah married her for 500 ''dirhams'' and the guardian for her marriage was al-‘Abbas ibn al-Muttalib.’”</ref> Muhammad agreed, but this was not acceptable to Abbas, who unexpectedly provided Maymunah with a dower anyway.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918 says the dower was 400 ''dirhams'', like that of all Muhammad’s other wives. Bewley/Saad 8:97 says it was 500 ''dirhams'', in keeping with Ibn Saad’s other traditions that Muhammad’s wives received 12½ ounces of silver. The higher sum is from the later histories, suggesting that the chroniclers adjusted it for inflation.</ref>

It has never been entirely clear why Muhammad married Maymunah. What ''is'' clear is that she was not poor or homeless and did not need rescuing.

===Mariyah bint Shamoon===

In one sense, Mariyah was poor. She was a slave in Egypt, and the Governor sent her to be a slave in Arabia, a gift from one powerful man to another.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 653.</ref> She possessed nothing of her own. She was herself property.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 194}}. “He had intercourse with her by virtue of her being his property.”</ref>

Muhammad sent his delegation to the Governor of Egypt in the final month of 6 A.H. (April or May 628).<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 98}}.</ref> It was 7 A.H. by the time the Governor responded by sending Mariyah to Medina,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:148.</ref> but presumably he did this fairly soon after receiving the delegation. So Mariyah was probably in Medina by the summer of 628. It is not certain what services Mariyah performed for Muhammad’s household in exchange for being fed and sheltered. It is never indicated that she sang or danced or similar. Rather, the statement “The Messenger of Allah was alone with his slavegirl Maria in Hafsa’s room”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:149.</ref> suggests that Mariyah did housework for Hafsah, much as Barira did for Aisha.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 496.</ref> Whatever the arrangement was, it saved Mariyah from destitution. However, if Muhammad's intentions were to save her from destitution, he would have manumitted her and sent her back to her family in Egypt. But he did not do this.

It was several months, perhaps over a year, before Muhammad took Mariyah as his concubine. Her son was born between 25 March and 22 April 630.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:149.</ref> This suggests that her month alone with Muhammad, when he refused to speak to his official wives,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:136-137.</ref> was around July 629. The wives’ strong reaction to the situation<ref>See the story in Bewley/Saad 8:49. It is also told in {{Bukhari|3|43|648}}, although Mariyah’s part in the story is minimised.</ref> indicates that they had only just found out that the housemaid had become a concubine - that is, she had not been a concubine for very long. So in this preceding year before becoming his concubine, Mariyah had nevertheless lived at Muhammad’s expense; and she continued to live at his expense afterwards.

Mariyah obviously did not “need” to be Muhammad’s concubine. He had already spent a year demonstrating that it was possible for her to live in his household without having sex with him.

===Mulaykah bint Kaab===

Not much is known about Mulaykah’s background, but her father appears to have been at least a minor chief. Although he was killed in battle in January 630,<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 187}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 165}}; Bewley/Saad 8:106.</ref> Mulaykah had plenty of other relatives to care for her. One of these was a cousin from the Udhra tribe, and he wanted to marry her.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 165}}; Bewley/Saad 8:106.</ref>

So Mulaykah’s family did not give her to Muhammad because she was at risk of starvation or because there was nobody else to care for her. They did it because they had offended Muhammad by resisting his invasion of Mecca<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 187}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 165}}; Bewley/Saad 8:106.</ref> and they hoped to appease him quickly by giving him a pretty girl.

This marriage ended in divorce after only a few weeks.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 187}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 165}}; Bewley/Saad 8:106.</ref> So whatever Muhammad’s reasons for marrying Mulaykah, they were evidently not very compelling. Whatever he thought she gained by marrying him, he ultimately declared himself not willing to provide it.

===Fatima (''Al-Aliyah'') bint Al-Dahhak===

Fatima’s father was a minor chief, and he was still alive when she married Muhammad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 570ff shows her father as a military commander of some authority. {{Abudawud|18|2921}} shows that he survived to the caliphate of Umar.</ref> So she was not poor.

This marriage also ended in divorce after only a few weeks.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 138}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 186-188}}; Bewley/Saad 8:100-101.</ref> At this point, Fatima ''became'' poor. Muhammad had no legal obligation to maintain her as the divorce had severed all ties between them. Strictly speaking, she should have returned to her father. But Al-Dahhak settled near Mecca<ref>{{Muwatta|43|17|9}}.</ref> and he left his daughter in Medina.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 186-188}}; Bewley/Saad 8:100-101.</ref>

There is no record that Fatima ever remarried; men were forbidden to approach a woman who had once been the wife of the Prophet.<ref>{{Quran|33|53}}.</ref> She had to work for a living. Muslim women were not forbidden to work, but the obligations of the Veil made most kinds of work difficult for them. Fatima eventually set up a business in collecting camel-dung, drying it out and selling it as fuel.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 186-188}}; Bewley/Saad 8:100-101.</ref> She apparently disliked this work, for she used to complain, “I am wretched! I am miserable!”<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 186-188}}; Bewley/Saad 8:100-101: “She used to collect the camels and say, ‘I am the wretch.’”</ref> But it seems she had difficulty in finding any other kind of work, for she continued with the camels all her life. While she lived another fifty years,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 186-188}}; Bewley/Saad 8:100-101.</ref> and therefore did not starve, it is unlikely that this kind of work brought in huge profits.

Neither Muhammad nor any other Muslim leader ever showed any interest in saving Fatima from her life of poverty.

===Asma bint Al-Numan===

Asma was a wealthy princess from [[Yemen]] who had lived all her life in luxury.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 189}}. Her tribe, the Kindah, were the rulers of Yemen.</ref> Her father hinted that he found Muhammad’s standard 12½ ounces of silver a “stingy” dower, but was forced to accept that this was all Asma would be paid.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 189}}.</ref>

===Amrah bint Yazid===

Not much is known about Amrah’s background. But this is not really relevant here. Muhammad divorced her on the first day,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 188}}; Bewley/Saad 8:101.</ref> and therefore, whether she was poor or not, he certainly did not provide for her materially.

===Tukanah al-Quraziya===

Like Rayhanah, Tukanah was a prisoner-of-war from the Qurayza tribe.<ref>[http://www.al-islam.org/hayat-al-qulub-vol2-allamah-muhammad-baqir-al-majlisi/ Al-Majlisi, ''Hayat al-Qulub'' vol. 2 chapter 52.] Translation by Rizvi, S. A. H. (2010). ''Life of the Heart''. Qum, Iran: Ansariyan Publications.</ref> She was only poor because Muhammad had attacked her tribe, killed its men and confiscated its property.

Muhammad selected Tukanah as one of his personal slaves. After that he had to feed her whether he had sex with her or not. So the fact that she became his concubine did not reduce her poverty. She would still have been living at his expense if she had only been his housemaid.

An alternative way to save Tukanah from poverty would have been not to attack her tribe in the first place.

===The Other Concubine===

Nothing is known about this woman except that she was a domestic maid (a slave) before she became a concubine.<ref>Ibn Al-Qayyim, ''Zaad Al-Maad'' vol. 1 p. 29, cited in Al-Mubarakpuri, S. R. (2002). ''The Sealed Nectar'', pp. 564-565. Riyadh: Darussalam.</ref> So Muhammad had to support her whether he had sex with her or not. Once again, he could have equally well “saved her from poverty” if he had simply left her as a domestic maid.

==Conclusion==

Muhammad himself never claimed that he married women out of compassion for their poverty. On the contrary, he asserted that he, and men in general, chose their wives for four basic motives: for their money, for their family connections, for their beauty and for their piety. He added: “So you should marry the pious woman or you will be a loser.”<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|27}}.</ref> The suggestion that Muhammad’s many marriages were motivated by a charitable concern for the welfare of widows is not found in the early sources. This theory seems to have been devised by a few modern historians and then uncritically accepted by others.

Nevertheless, the widely held view that “Muhammad married poor widows to provide them with a home” is not supported by the historical evidence.

==See Also==

* [[Muhammad's Wives]]'' - A hub page that leads to other articles related to Muhammad's wives and concubines''

==References==
{{Reflist|30em}}

[[Category:Muhammad]]
[[Category:Islam and Women]]
{{page_title|Muhammad's Marriages and Poor Widows}}

Ages of Muhammads Wives at Marriage

2013-07-14T05:17:36Z

1234567: /* Amrah's Age */ Found the hadith. Case now stronger.

This article analyzes the widely repeated claim that all of Prophet [[Muhammad]]'s [[Muhammad's Wives|wives]], except for [[Aisha]], were elderly women.
==Introduction==

Muslim apologists claim that Prophet Muhammad’s wives were elderly and that he did not [[Marriage|marry]] them for physical attraction.

{{Quote|[http://www.islam4women.org/conclusions/ Islam for Women]|But all his wives were elderly ladies or widows except [Aisha and Mariyah]. If the aim had been seeking sexual pleasures, he would have done so in his youth and would have married young maidens, not aged widows.}}

{{Quote|[http://www.al-islam.org/lifeprophet/25.htm/ Al-Islam: Life of the Prophet, chapter 25]|Then he emigrated to Medina and began spreading the word of Allah. Thereafter, he married eight women, all of them widows or divorcees, all old or middle-aged.}}

Even some non-Muslim historians have repeated this claim.

{{Quote|Thomas, B. S. (1937). ''The Arabs'', pp. 65-66. New York: Doubleday, Doran and Co., Inc.|All appear to have been elderly widows except A’isha … The elderly wives were widows of companions who had fallen in the wars, and Muhammad married them to shelter them and provide them with homes.}}

What this highlights is that terms like “middle-aged” and “elderly” are subjective. They do not give precise information about how old the women were. Rather than debate what the words “middle-aged” and “elderly” ought to mean, we will consult the early Muslim sources and calculate the age of each wife on the day she married Muhammad.

===Calculating Comparative Dates===

The [[Islamic Lunar Calendar|Islamic year]] consists of twelve lunar cycles and hence it is 354 or 355 days long. This means it is quite difficult to calculate comparative dates. For example:

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 281.|The apostle came to Medina on Monday at high noon on 12 Rabi-Awwal. The apostle on that day was 53 years of age, that being 13 years after God called him.}}

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 69.|The apostle was born on Monday 12 Rabi-Awwal in the Year of the Elephant.}}

This [http://www.fourmilab.ch/documents/calendar/ calendar tool] advises us that the date ''12 Rabi-Awwal 1 AH'' is equivalent to the Gregorian date ''27 September 622 AD''.<ref>If you would like to use the [http://www.fourmilab.ch/documents/calendar/ calendar converter], bear in mind that it is programmed to assume that year-numbers are integers, i.e., that each date-system includes a year 0. Of course, none of them does. The year before 1 AH is 1 BH and the year before 1 AD is 1 BC. So if, for example, you want to calculate the year ''53 BH'', you need to call it ''-52'' on this calculator.</ref> But this does not give the 53-year-old Muhammad a birthdate of 27 September 569. Because the lunar year is shorter, Muhammad’s age at the time of the ''Hijra'' was only about 51½ solar years. According to the calculator, his birthdate of 12 Rabi-Awwal 53 BH is equivalent to the Gregorian date 26 April 571.

The Gregorian calendar did not exist in Muhammad’s day, so reporting dates in Gregorian style is an anachronism. However, it will be convenient to compare Muhammad’s calendar with the Gregorian calendar, which is internationally the most widely accepted and used civil calendar.<ref>[http://www.usno.navy.mil/USNO/astronomical-applications/astronomical-information-center/calendars Introduction to Calendars]. United States Naval Observatory. Retrieved 15 January 2009.</ref><ref>[http://astro.nmsu.edu/~lhuber/leaphist.html Calendars] by L. E. Doggett. Section 2.</ref><ref>The international standard for the representation of dates and times, ISO 8601, uses the Gregorian calendar. Section 3.2.1.</ref>

When Muslim historians speak of “the Year of the Elephant,” they always mean the year when Muhammad was born, which fell between 15 February 571 and 3 February 572.

That Muhammad apparently arrived in [[Medina]] exactly on his birthday – 12 Rabi-Awwal which was also his death-date<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 689</ref> – suggests that his official birthday is a made-up date. In fact the early historians give numerous suggestions for birth-dates other than the 12th, which the calculator tells was in any case a Friday and not a Monday. However, since the variant birthdays for Muhammad are all in the month of Rabi-Awwal and the year “of the Elephant,” we shall assume here that Muhammad was born in April 571.

A further complication is that nobody is certain that the pre-''Hijri'' year was exactly the same as the Muslim year that was standardised after the ''Hijra''. However, Muhammad complained about the custom of adding an intercalary month, which was probably a Medinan practice introduced by the [[Jews]].<ref>See [http://www.jewishencyclopedia.com/articles/3920-calendar-history-of#anchor4/ “Calendar, History of”] in Funk & Wagnalls (1906). ''Jewish Encyclopaedia''. New York: Author.</ref> The fact that he abolished intercalary months<ref>{{Quran-range|9|36|37}}.</ref> suggests that no such practice had been known in Mecca and that the old Meccan year was much the same as the later Islamic year.

==Analysis==

===Khadijah's Age===

The discussion about [[Khadijah]]’s age does not arouse the type of defensiveness and [[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha|imaginative apologetics]] that surrounds the discussion of Aisha’s age. Nobody denies that Khadijah married Muhammad as a very willing adult. Nevertheless, the traditional view of her age is probably wrong.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:11; {{Tabari|39|p. 41}}.|Hakim ibn Hizam said, “The Messenger of Allah married Khadijah when she was 40 and the Messenger of Allah was 25. Khadijah was two years older than me. She was born 15 years before the Elephant and I was born 13 years before the Elephant.”}}

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:12; {{Tabari|39|p. 161}}.|Hakim ibn Hizam said, “Khadijah bint Khuwaylid died in the month of Ramadan in the tenth year of prophethood. She was 65 then.”}}

The year “65 years before the tenth year of prophethood” ran between 27 July 556 and 15 July 557, which was 15 years before the Year of the Elephant, so this is internally consistent.

Hakim was Khadijah’s nephew.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 160</ref> Since children generally know the ages of their playmates, it is assumed that Hakim would have known the age of an aunt who was only two years older than himself. That is why his statement that she married Muhammad when she was 40 is usually accepted as true. However, there are problems with Hakim’s assertion.

====Hakim ibn Hizam====

The first problem is that Hakim claimed his own age to be 120.<ref>{{Muslim|10|3662}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 106}}.</ref> This is intrinsically questionable. To bolster his story, Hakim claimed to remember the episode when Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim vowed to sacrifice his son Abdullah to the god Hubal but was able to ransom him for 100 camels. He says this was about five years before Muhammad was born.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 41, 106}}.</ref> But Hakim’s ability to recite details that were already common knowledge does not prove he was an eyewitness to the event: he might well have heard the story from his parents.

Hakim’s remarks about Khadijah’s age might have served a similar function of supporting his personal boasts rather than relaying accurate history. If he had long ago mentioned that Khadijah was two years older than himself, he might have needed to stick to his story about her relative age and readjust her chronological age in order to keep it consistent with his claims about his own age. There is something suspicious about his remark here.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:9|We asked Hakim ibn Hizam which of them was older, the Messenger of Allah or Khadijah? He said, “Khadijah was 15 years older than him. The prayer was unlawful for my aunt before the Messenger of Allah was born.” Hakim’s statement, “The prayer was unlawful for her,” means she menstruated, but he is speaking as the people of Islam speak.}}

The reporter is emphasising that Hakim was only using a figure of speech to indicate Khadijah’s age and did not literally mean that she followed Islamic [[prayers|prayer]] rituals before Muhammad was even born. However, this kind of careless anachronism is exactly what we would expect from a person who is not ''remembering'' an event but ''inventing'' it from his imagination. Crudely, it is the way liars speak.

It is not impossible for a human to live 120 years but it is an exception to the general rule. So it is surprising how many early Muslims claimed to have reached this great age. Yahya ibn Mandah even wrote a book entitled ''Those of the Companions who Lived 120 Years'', in which he lists fourteen 120-year-old Muslims.<ref>Yahya ibn Mandah. ''Juz f̀ihi man 'asha miattan wa-'ishrina sanatan min al-Sahabah''.</ref> Hakim ibn Hizam is one of them. Another is Huwaytib ibn Abduluzza.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 43}}.|Huwaytib ibn Abduluzza lived 120 years, 60 of them in the ''Jahiliya'' and 60 in Islam.}}

Huwaytib died in the year 54 AH (673-674)<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 40}}.</ref> so he should have converted to Islam in the year 7 BH (615–616). The problem is, he openly admits that he did not convert until the conquest of Mecca in 8 AH (January 630). He gives a long list of excuses for the delay in his conversion<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 43-46}}.</ref> but he never checks his arithmetic. If he became a Muslim in 8 AH, this was only 46 years before his death and not 60. This makes his age at death no more than 106. Of course, even this age assumes that he really was as old as 60 at the time of his conversion, which we now have licence to doubt. Huwaytib ibn Abduluzza lived to be elderly, but he was probably not entitled to his chapter in Yahya ibn Mandah’s book.

Muhammad’s poet, Hassan ibn Thabit, also claimed to be 120 years old. He said he was 60 at the time of the ''Hijra'' and that he lived another 60 years afterwards.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 72}}.</ref> This means he should have been born in 60 BH (seven years before Muhammad) and should have died in 61 AH (680-681). Tabari vaguely states that he died “in the caliphate of Muawiya,”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 72}}</ref> which was between 40 and 60 AH (February 661 - April 680). Modern historians usually give his death-date as 54 AH, which is seven years too early.<ref>[http://archive.org/details/diwanofhassantha00hassuoft/ ''The Diwan of Hassan ibn Thabit''.]</ref>

Not included in Yahya ibn Mandah’s book is the poet Abu Afak, who was said to be 120 years old in 624 when he was [[List of Killings Ordered or Supported by Muhammad|assassinated for criticising Muhammad]].<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 2 p. 31.</ref> Of course, no records have survived from pre-Islamic Medina; it was only hearsay that attributed this great age to Abu Afak. Yet even his enemies were willing to go along with the hearsay.

Is it really plausible that so many persons (all of them male) lived to be 120? Assuming it is not, is it even fair to accuse them of lying about their ages? More likely, there was some culturally understood convention attached to the number 120. People who boasted that, “I was already 60 before Event X and I have survived another 60 years since,” did not expect to be taken literally. They were simply saying, “I’m really, really old.”

If Hakim ibn Hizam was not literally 120, nor is it necessarily true that Khadijah (or any other person) was the age he claimed for her.

====Abdullah ibn Abbas====

The second problem with Khadijah’s age is that there is a strong alternative tradition, one that originates from no less a person than Abdullah ibn Abbas. Ibn Abbas was the cousin who lived at Muhammad’s side through the final years in Medina.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 95}}.</ref> He was a great source of ''ahadith'' and his word would normally be accepted without question.<ref>See {{Tabari|39|pp. 54-57, 95}} for brief accolades. For a modern assessment of his contribution, see Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: its origin, development, special features and criticism'', pp. 33-34. Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> What is more, his mother was a close friend of Khadijah’s.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 201}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> The only reason why Abdullah has been largely ignored on the subject of Khadijah is that he never knew her personally while Hakim ibn Hizam did.<ref>{{Tabari|39|55}}; Bewley/Saad 8:12; {{Tabari|39|p. 161}}.</ref> Abdullah ibn Abbas says:

{{Quote|[http://qurango.com/images/b/5/293.jpg/ Ibn Ishaq, cited in Al-Hakim, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 3 p. 182. Ibn Kathir, ''Al-Bidaya wa’l-Nihaya'' vol. 5 p. 293].<ref>Hanbali, cited in Al-Irbali, ''Kashf al-Ghumma''. Majlisi, ''Bihar al-Anwar'' vol. 16 p. 12.</ref>|On the day Khadijah married Allah’s Messenger, she was '''28 years old'''.}}

This tradition was strong enough to be accepted by Ibn Ishaq. It was not included in the recension of Ibn Hisham (who was not interested in the ages of women) or used as a source by Ibn Saad or Tabari (who followed Hakim ibn Hizam's tradition, presumably for the reasons given above). But it was included by Al-Hakim al-Naysaburi, who lived about a hundred years after Tabari.<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-2/al-hakim-al-naysaburi-SIM_2638/ Robson, J. (2013). "Al-Ḥakim al-Naysaburi" in Bearman, P., Bianquis, T., Bosworth, C. E., van Donzel, E., & Heinrichs, W. P. (1960). ''Encyclopaedia of Islam, 2nd Ed.'' Leiden: Brill.]</ref> Although he was not an “early” historian, he was apparently still early enough to have direct access to the work of Ibn Ishaq.

An independent tradition is:

{{Quote|Bayhaqi, ''Signs of Prophethood'' vol. 2 p. 71.|Some say that Khadijah died at 65, but age 50 is sounder.}}

If she was 50 at death, she was 25 at marriage. However, this is not really a third tradition about Khadijah’s age, for the context suggests that the number 50 is only an approximation. So the tradition that Khadijah was married at “about 25” is actually independent support for the tradition that she was in fact 28.

====Gynaecology====

The third problem with Khadijah’s age is the common-sense consideration that she bore Muhammad six children over a period of ten years.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 83. Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref> If she married him at 40, she was 50 by the time she gave birth to Fatima in 605.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:13.</ref> While this is not completely impossible, it is a sufficiently unusual achievement to cause us to pause and question the assertion.

Muhammad’s detractors in Mecca asked him why he did not perform any miracles.<ref>{{Quran|2|118}}. {{Quran|2|145}}. {{Quran|6|37}}. {{Quran|6|109}}. {{Quran|10|20}}. {{Quran|13|7}}. {{Quran|17|59}}. Guillaume/Ishaq 133ff. {{Bukhari|9|92|379}}.</ref> The only response available to him was, “The Qur’an is my miracle,”<ref>{{Quran|24|1}}. {{Quran-range|98|1|4}}.</ref> but it is clear that he was not happy about this response. He subsequently claimed to have [[Moon Split Miracle|split the moon]] and to have travelled to Jerusalem and back [[The Holy Qur'an: Al-Isra (The Night Journey)|in one night]]. Later tales, omitted from the earliest histories, claimed that he had multiplied food like [[Jesus]] Christ,<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 42.35/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:42:35-36]; Matthew 14:13-21.</ref> transfigured wood into iron, reminiscent of Elisha’s retrieval of the borrowed axe-head,<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 42.38/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:42:38]; II Kings 6:5-7.</ref> or cursed his enemy’s camel to sink in the sand.<ref>[http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 42.40/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:42:40].</ref> Yet in the hostile atmosphere of Mecca, where a miracle was desperately desired to reinforce Muhammad’s credibility, he never pointed to his wife’s extraordinary fecundity. He never called it a blessing similar to Sarah’s gestation of Isaac<ref>Genesis 17:15-21, 21:1-7.</ref> or Elizabeth’s of John the Baptist.<ref>Luke 1:5-25, 57-80.</ref> In fact nobody expressed even mild surprise that a woman of Khadijah’s age had produced so many children.

Perhaps that was because Khadijah’s fertility was a commonplace for a woman of her age. Perhaps she was still in her thirties when she bore Muhammad’s children. Perhaps, when her daughter Fatima was weaned in 607,<ref>{{Tabari|39|166}}; see {{Quran|2|233}} and Guillaume/Ishaq 71 for two years as the customary duration of nursing.</ref> Khadijah was still a few months short of forty – and that was why her childbearing ceased.

====Conclusion====

If Khadijah was only two to three years older than Muhammad, this makes sense of a great deal. It explains how she was able to use her sex appeal as well as her money to attract him. It explains how she was able to produce six children in ten years and why she then stopped childbearing. It explains why Muhammad remained attracted to Khadijah for so long when, in later life, he was to reject older women.<ref>See Bewley/Saad 8:40, 111, 113; {{Tabari|9|pp. 139, 140}}.</ref> It explains why, after twenty years of marriage, he began thinking about younger women,<ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap4.htm/ Muir (1861) 2:141-144]. See also [http://www.muhammadanism.org/Canon_Sell/Quran/p024.htm/ Sell, E. (1923). ''The Historical Development of the Qur'an'', 4th Ed, pp. 25-26. London: People International.]</ref> for Khadijah would have been at that time menopausal and ''first'' losing her looks.

{{Quote|Mughaltay, ''Al-Zahr al-Basim fi Sirat Abi’l-Qasim'', cited in Kister, M. J. (1993). The Sons of Khadijah. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 16'', 59-95.|The Prophet returned with Maysara from Syria on the 14th night from the end of Dhu’l-Hijja in the 25th year from the Day of the Elephant [3 May 595] … The Prophet married Khadijah two months and 15 days after his return from Syria, at the end of Safar in the 26th year.}}

While this date, not found in the major ''hadith'' collections, might be an educated fabrication rather than literally historical, there are no rival suggestions for Muhammad and Khadijah’s wedding date. The year at least fits with all the generally accepted information about the ages of Muhammad and his children. 26 Elephant was 28 BH. A wedding date of 29 Safar that year would have fallen on 16 July 595.

If Khadijah was 28 at that time, she was born in the year between March 568 and March 569, some dozen years later than Hakim ibn Hizam claimed. Her age in solar years could have been anywhere between 26 years 4 months and 27 years 4 months. All we can do is take the median and accept it as an approximation.

*Khadijah’s Median Age = 26 years and 10 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 24 years and 3 months.
*Age Difference = (minus) 2 years and 7 months.

Far from being a “much older” woman, it appears that Khadijah was the only one of Muhammad’s wives who might fairly be deemed the same age as himself.

===Sawdah's Age===

No contemporary historian gives Sawdah’s exact age, so we can only make an educated guess. The wedding date, however, is widely agreed.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 170}}.|The Prophet married Sawdah in Ramadan, in the tenth year after his prophethood. This was after Khadijah’s death and before his marriage to Aisha.}}

Ramadan fell between 13 April and 12 May 620; but as Khadijah died on 10 Ramadan<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:152. See also {{Tabari|39|pp. 4, 161}}.</ref> (22 April), Muhammad probably married Sawdah towards the end of the month. We can call the date “May 620” without being far wrong.

Because Sawdah is described as “older” than her co-wives, this has led to extreme guesses that she was a bride of 65<ref>[http://www.islamforamal.com/contents-2/prophet-s-biography/prophets-wives/ Prophet’s Wives (Ummul Momineen)].</ref> or even 80<ref>[http://books.google.com.au/books?id=lJe3PNVAnK4C&dq=Sawdah+became+an+old+woman&q=Sawdah#v=snippet&q=Sawdah&f=false/ Al Ghoudairy, F. Why Did Prophet Muhammed Marry Aisha; the Young Girl, p. 24. Dare to read.]</ref> However, while trying to establish Sawdah’s age, we can immediately rule out any estimates that ignore three established facts.

====Sawdah’s Father was Still Alive====

When Khawla bint Hakim brought Muhammad’s marriage proposal to Sawdah:

{{Quote|{{Tabari|9|p. 130}}.|Sawdah said, “I want you to go to my father and tell him about it.” Khawla states: he was a very old man and had stayed away from the pilgrimage. I went to him and greeted him with the pre-Islamic salutation and told him that Muhammad ibn Abdullah ibn Abdulmuttalib had sent me to ask for Sawdah’s hand in marriage. “A noble match,” he replied. “What does your friend say?” … [Muhammad] came and [Zamaa] married her to him.}}

====Sawdah Lived another 54 Years====

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:43.|Sawdah bint Zamaa died in Medina in Shawwal of 54, during the caliphate of Muawiya.}}

This date is between 11 September and 9 October 674 – more than 54 years after the day when Sawdah married Muhammad. If she had lived to be 134, or even 114, someone would have commented. But if she was only about 40 on her wedding day, she must have survived to her mid-90s, which is impressive but plausible.

====Sawdah had Not Reached Menopause====

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|1|8|3451}}.|As [Sawdah] '''became old''', she had made over her day with Allah’s Messenger to Aisha. She said: “I have made over my day with you to Aisha.” So Allah’s Messenger allotted two days to Aisha, her own day and that of Sawdah.}}

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:40.|Sawdah bint Zamaa '''became old''' and the Messenger of Allah did not have much to do with her. … She became afraid that he would divorce her and she would lose her place with him. So she said, “Messenger of Allah, my day which falls for me is for Aisha and you are in the lawful in it.”}}

The texts do not say that Sawdah “was old” but that she “''became'' old”, i.e. that she was only at the beginning of the “old age” period of her life. In the modern world, this would suggest that she was 65 or 70, which may explain why modern historians have assumed she was very elderly. But this is clearly impossible in the light of the fact that she lived another fifty years.

In the culture of the medieval Arabs, when a woman’s value to society depended on her capacity to bear children, a woman only had three life-stages: childhood (before she could bear children), adulthood (childbearing age) and old age (when she was past childbearing). So an “old” woman was simply one who was too old to have children – possibly a healthy, active, sharp-minded woman as young as 40. It is practically certain that the sentence “Sawdah became old” really only means “Sawdah reached menopause.”<ref>Personal communication with native speakers of Arabic. See also [[:File:Kahla3.jpg|this]] image of an “elderly” lady (''kahla'') from Afghanistan.</ref>

When did Sawdah reach menopause? Obviously it was after Muhammad had consummated his marriage to Aisha in 623. So we already know that Sawdah was pre-menopausal in 620. But in fact it was even later than this, for the near-divorce episode is referred to in {{Quran|4|128}}. Ibn Kathir frankly admits:

{{Quote|Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q4:128.|Ibn Abbas said that the ''ayah'' refers to, “When the husband gives his wife the choice between staying with him or leaving him, as this is better than the husband preferring other wives to her.” However, the apparent wording of the ''ayah'' refers to the settlement where the wife forfeits some of the rights she has over her husband, with the husband agreeing to this concession, and that this settlement is better than divorce. For instance, the Prophet kept Sawdah bint Zam’ah as his wife after she offered to forfeit her day for A’ishah.}}

The fourth ''[[surah]]'' of the [[Qur'an]] is long and was probably not written all at once. But it all belongs to the same general period. It covers many family issues, including inheritance rights. {{Quran-range|4|7|11}} was written to answer the complaint of an Uhud widow,<ref>{{Abudawud|18|2885}}; [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=711&Itemid=59/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q4:7]; [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=707&Itemid=59/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q4:11].</ref> so it must date from after 22 March 625. This same incident confirmed the limitation of the number of wives to four,<ref>{{Quran|4|3}}.</ref> so it must have been written before Muhammad was given permission to take a fifth concurrent wife<ref>{{Quran|33|50}}.</ref> on 27 March 627.<ref>{{Tabari|8|pp. 1-4}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}; Bewley/Saad 8:72-73, 81.</ref> The ''surah'' is also full of invectives against the Jews<ref>{{Quran-range|4|46|59}}; {{Quran-range|4|150|175}}.</ref> and “hypocrites,”<ref>{{Quran-range|4|60|68}}; {{Quran-range|4|136|149}}.</ref> who were no longer a problem after April 627.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> So the episode in which Sawdah “became old” and pleaded with Muhammad to not divorce her occurred between mid-625 and early 627.

In fact, we strongly suspect that the date was towards the end of this period. Muhammad most likely considered divorcing Sawdah in December 626 or January 627 expressly because he wanted to marry a fifth woman but was trying to observe the limit of four wives.<ref>{{Quran|4|3}}.</ref> If Muhammad had not been contemplating marriage to a fifth woman, there would have been no point in divorcing Sawdah, for she was no trouble to him at home.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:40.</ref> It was only after he had decided to keep Sawdah that he needed the special dispensation to marry unlimited wives. However, the sources do not explicitly state this circumstance as the reason for the near-divorce. They only say that Sawdah “became old” and so Muhammad wanted to divorce her.

If Sawdah was menopausal in 626, or perhaps 625, this suggests she was then aged about 45, making her around 40 when she married Muhammad.

====Conclusion====

When Muhammad married Sawdah in May 620, he was 49. It is possible that Sawdah was also about that age<ref>[http://www.themodernreligion.com/prophet/prophet_aisha.htm/ Ahmed, S. “Prophet Muhammad and Aisha Siddiqa.”]</ref> and that she lived to be over 100. But it is unlikely. Allowing that she was not yet menopausal and that she had a father living, she was probably closer to 40.

*Sawdah’s Probable Age = about 40 years.
*Muhammad’s Age = 49 years and 1 month.
*Age Difference = 9 years, plus or minus a few.

The age difference between Muhammad and Sawdah was not inappropriate for a middle-aged couple; but she was almost certainly the younger spouse. And we will state here that Sawdah was the oldest bride whom Muhammad ever married.

===Aisha's Age===

This question has already been adequately answered [[Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aishas Age|here]] and [[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha|here]]. In sum, there is absolutely no reason to doubt Aisha’s own statements.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:44.|The Messenger of Allah married me when I was six and consummated the marriage when '''I was nine'''. I was playing on a see-saw … I used to play dolls.}}

{{Quote|{{Muslim|8|3310}}|Allah’s Apostle married me when I was six years old, and I was admitted to his house when '''I was nine years old.'''}}

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 171}}.|The Prophet married Aisha in Shawwal in the tenth year after the prophethood [13 May - 10 June 620], three years before the ''Hijra''. He consummated the marriage in Shawwal, eight months after the ''Hijra'' [11 May - 9 April 623]. On the day he consummated the marriage with her, '''she was nine years old.'''}}

Copious documentation on hundreds of Muhammad’s companions shows that most Arabs knew their age to the nearest year. Why should Aisha, with her extraordinary memory,<ref>For a modern assessment of Aisha’s contribution to the ''hadith'' literature, see Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: its origin, development, special features and criticism'', pp. 33-34. Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> her penchant for details and her talent for arithmetic,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:47.</ref> have been any exception? To suggest that, contrary to her clear statement, she miscalculated or fabricated her own age is not logical. The information about her death only confirms her consistency.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 173}}.|Aisha died on Tuesday night, the 17 Ramadan 58 AH [16 July 678], and she was buried the same night after the night prayer. She was then 66 years old.}}

The year 66 years before 58 AH was once again nine years before the ''Hijra'', making Aisha nine years old at her consummation in 1 AH. While it may well be true that most Arabs only knew their age to the year and not to the day, there is some evidence that Aisha’s family had noted at least the month in which she was born.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:55.|Aisha was born '''at the beginning of the fourth year''' of prophethood, and she married the Messenger of Allah in the tenth year, in Shawwal, when she was six.}}

If they knew that she had been born at the “beginning” and not the “middle” or the “end” of the year, it is unlikely that they would have been wrong about the year itself. “The fourth year of prophethood” was indeed the ninth year before the ''Hijra'' (25 October 613 - 13 October 614). It was the year when Muhammad first preached Islam in public;<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 117.</ref> Aisha’s parents would not have forgotten what was happening around the city at the time when their daughter was born. Abu Bakr’s accuracy is not really surprising, as he was a recognised expert on genealogy,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115.</ref> so a person’s month of birth was exactly the kind of detail that he would remember.

{{Quote|{{Muslim|8|3311}}|Aisha narrated that Allah’s Apostle married her when she was seven years old, and he she was taken to his house as a bride '''when she was nine''', and her dolls were with her; and when he died she was 18 years old.}}

{{Quote|Ibn Majah 3:1877|Abdullah narrated. The Holy Prophet married Aisha while she was a seven-year-old girl and took her to his house as a bride '''when she was nine years old''' and he parted with her when she was 18 years old.}}

These two narratives offer a variant for Aisha’s age when she was legally married, but this is an uncertainty about ''the date of the contract'' (two rather than three years before the consummation). It does not reflect any uncertainty about Aisha’s date of birth, since they confirm that the marriage was consummated when she was nine. The real discrepancy can be missed by a casual reader, but it is obvious to anyone familiar with the Islamic calendar.

Aisha was married in the ''first'' year AH (19 July 622 - 7 July 623) and widowed in the ''eleventh'' (1 April 632 - 20 March 633). Since she was married at nine, she should have been 19, not 18, when Muhammad died. This is possibly just careless counting by some person other than Aisha: “Nine and a bit plus nine and a bit is still only 18.” But it could also mean that on the day when Muhammad died, Aisha had not yet passed her birthday. Muhammad died on 12 Rabi-Awwal 11 AH (i.e., in the middle of the third month) (10 June 632).<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 689</ref> If Aisha knew that she had been born on some date later in the year than 12 Rabi-Awwal, then she was still only 18 and not 19 when she was widowed.

This gives us Aisha’s date of birth to within six weeks. It might have been as early as 13 Rabi-Awwal 9 BH (4 January 614). But it is unlikely that it was any later than 29 Rabi-Thani 9 BH (19 February 614), as any date later than the fourth month would not have been “early” in the year. So we can express Aisha’s birthday as ''27 January 614, plus or minus three weeks.''

Her marriage was consummated in the tenth month of the first year AH. This fell between 11 April and 9 May (median = 25 April 623). We can now take an informed estimate of her age at consummation.

*Aisha’s Median Age at Consummation = 9 years and 3 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 52 years and 0 months.
*Age Difference = 42 years and 9 months.

The exact age or age difference down to the day or even to the year do not matter. The real points are that (1) Aisha was a prepubescent child, and (2) Muhammad was old enough to be her grandfather.

Aisha was the youngest bride whom Muhammad married. It does not follow that she was the youngest wife in the household. Towards the end of his life, Muhammad acquired a few women whose age in years was even younger than Aisha’s.

===Hafsah's Age===

There is some discrepancy about Hafsah’s exact age but there is no doubt at all concerning her approximate age.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:56.|Hafsah was born when the Quraysh were building the House, five years before the Prophet was sent.}}

This was the year from 30 January 605 to 19 January 606, so the median birthdate for Hafsah is 26 July 605. Muhammad’s daughter Fatima was born in the same year.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 166}}.</ref>

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.|Hafsah died in Shabaan AH 45 during the caliphate of Muawiya. She was then 60 years old.}}

This was the month between 20 October and 17 November 665, which is a contradiction. If Hafsah died at the age of 60 Islamic years, she would have been born in 607 (median = 4 July 607), two years later than Ibn Saad claims. However, the date “when the Quraysh were rebuilding the House” is precise, and so is the mention of Shabaan as the month of death. If both these details are correct, it is possible that “she was then 60” was only meant as an approximation.

So we will assume that Hafsah was born in 605; but we should bear in mind she might have been two years younger than this.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.|The Prophet married Hafsah in Shabaan 30 months after [the ''Hijra''], before the battle of Uhud.}}

Shabaan 3 AH fell between 20 January and 17 February 625 (median = 3 February).

*Hafsah’s Median Age = 19 years and 7 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 53 years and 9 months.
*Age Difference = 34 years and 2 months.

It does not really matter whether Hafsah was 19 or 17. The important points are that (1) she was biologically a woman and not a child, but (2) she was a ''young'' woman, while Muhammad was biologically old enough to be her grandfather.

===Zaynab bint Khuzayma's Age===

Zaynab’s life is not well documented, which has led to guessing about her age.

{{Quote|[http://www.questionsonislam.com/question/could-you-give-information-about-prophet%E2%80%99s-wives-and-his-polygamy/ Hussein (2011). “Could you give information about the Prophet’s wives and his polygamy?”] in ''Questions on Islam''.|Zainab bint Huzaima … was 60 years old … Of course, it is impossible for a marriage with a sixty-year old woman to have passion. The only aim of this marriage was to help someone who was left alone.}}

However, there is no need for this kind of guessing, for her age is in fact recorded.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|164}}.|I asked, “How old was she when she died?” He said, “'''Thirty years''' or so.”}}

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:82.|[Muhammad] married [Zaynab] in Ramadan at the beginning of the 31st month of the Hijra. She remained with him for eight months and then died at the end of Rabi al-Akhir at the beginning of the 39th month.}}

Zaynab was therefore married on or soon after 18 February 625. She died on or just before 11 October 625. If she was “about 30” in 4 AH, she was born in October 596, plus or minus a few years.

*Zaynab’s Median Age = 28 years and 4 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 53 years and 10 months.
*Age Difference = 25 years and 6 months.

Zaynab married five times.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bewley/Saad 8:82; {{Tabari|9|p. 138}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 163-614}}.</ref> Her fifth choice, it seems, fell on a high-status and already-married man old enough to be her father.

===Hind's Age===

The data about Hind (Umm Salama) is precise, and there are no variant traditions.

{{Quote| Bewley/Saad 8:61.|She died in Dhu’l-Qada 59 AH [17 August - 15 September 679].}}

{{Quote| Bewley/Saad 8:67|It is related that '''she was 84''' when she died.}}

Eighty-four years before 59 AH brings us to the year between 26 April 597 and 15 April 598 and a median birthdate of 20 October 597.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:61.|The Messenger of Allah married her at the end of the month of Shawwal 4 AH [on or before 6 April 626].}}

*Hind’s Median Age = 28 years and 6 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 55 years and 0 months.
*Age Difference = 26 years and 6 months.

It is very plausible that Hind was 28 when she married Muhammad, for her fourth child was then a newborn<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63-66.</ref> while her eldest daughter was about ten years of age.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 147.</ref>

===Zaynab bint Jahsh's Age===

There is dispute about Muhammad's biological cousin's<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72; {{Tabari|8|p. 4}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 180}}; cf Guillaume/Ishaq 3; Maududi (1967), Tafhimul Quran, Chapter Al Ahzab</ref> exact age, but there is no doubt about her approximate age.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:80.|I saw Umar ibn Al-Khattab pray over Zaynab bint Jahsh in 20 AH [641 CE] on a summer day, and I saw a cloth stretched over her grave.}}

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.|According to Umar ibn Uthman [ibn Abdullah al-Jahshi] from his father: “Zaynab bint Jahsh died at the age of 53.”}}

Note that this narrator was the grandson of Zaynab’s own nephew. If Zaynab was 53 in 20 AH, she was born in 34 BH between 23 July 589 and 11 July 590 (median = 15 January 590).

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.|The Prophet married Zaynab bint Jahsh on the first of Dhu’l-Qada 5.}}

The first of Dhu’l-Qada 5 AH was 27 March 627. However, there is a contradiction. The same nephew who said she died at age 53 also said:

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:81|Uthman ibn Abdullah al-Jahshi said, “The Messenger of Allah married Zaynab bint Jahsh at the beginning of the month of Dhu’l-Qada in 5 AH. '''She was 35''' at the time.”}}

Thirty-five years before 5 AH brings us to a birth-year of 31 BH (20 June 592 - 8 June 593), a discrepancy of three years. Probably Umar ibn Uthman was giving a round number when he said she was married at 35; to be conservative, we will assume the earlier birthdate. However, we must bear in mind that Zaynab might have been some three years younger than this.

*Zaynab’s Median Age = 37 years and 2 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 55 years and 11 months.
*Age Difference = 18 years and 9 months.

Therefore we have to discard modern commentaries claiming that Zaynab was “in late middle age.”<ref>[http://www.ispi-usa.org/muhammad/appendix2.html/ Akhter, J. (2001). “The Prophet's Marriages and Wives”] in ''The Seven Phases of Prophet Muhammad's Life''. Chicago: ISPI.</ref> While her contemporary community might not have considered her “a young woman,” this is relative. She was still young enough to have been Muhammad’s daughter.

===Juwayriyah's Age===

Juwayriyah’s age is only mildly controversial.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 184}}.|According to Juwayriyah: “'''I was 20 years old''' when the Prophet married me.”}}

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:85.|Juwayriyah died in 50 AH [1 February 670 - 20 January 671] when she was 65.}}

If Juwayriyah was 65 in 50 AH, the year in which she was born would have been 16 BH, which fell between 9 January and 28 December 607. (Although there is a variant tradition that she did not die until 56 AH,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 184}}; Bewley/Saad 8:85.</ref> this tradition does not state her age at death, so we shall ignore it.) The year in which she was 20 would have been 5 AH. There is indeed some evidence for a wedding date of 5 AH.

{{Quote|Ibn Hisham note 918.|He married Juwayriyah bint al-Harith ibn Abi Dirar al-Khuza’iya, who was among the captives of the Mustaliq of Khuza’a tribe.}}

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 490.|[The apostle] attacked the Mustaliq branch of the Khuza’a tribe … He went out and met them at a watering-place of theirs called al-Muraysi …}}

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:81|I asked Aisha about the marriage of the Messenger of Allah to Zaynab bint Jahsh. She said, “On our return from the expedition of al-Muraysi or shortly after it.” }}

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.|The Prophet married Zaynab bint Jahsh on the first of Dhu’l-Qada 5 AH.}}

This supports a date of 5 AH, though earlier than the eleventh month of Dhu’l-Qada, for the marriage to Juwayriyah.

However, this cannot be right. For a start, Ibn Ishaq disagrees.

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 490.|[The apostle] attacked the Mustaliq branch of the Khuza’a tribe in '''Shaaban 6 AH''' [19 December 627 - 16 January 628].}}

Further, it is certain that the raid at al-Muraysi and consequent marriage to Juwayriyah took place not before, but ''after'', Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab bint Jahsh. As Aisha tells the story:

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 494.|[Muhammad] cast lots between his wives which of them should accompany him. He did this on the occasion of the raid on the Mustaliq tribe, and the lot fell on me, so the apostle took me out.}}

On the way home, Aisha was temporarily lost:

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 494.|So I wrapped myself in my smock … [Safwan ibn al-Mu’attal al-Sulami] passed me … He saw my form and came and stood over me. He used to see me before the veil was prescribed for us, so when he saw me he exclaimed in astonishment, “The apostle’s wife!” while I was wrapped in my garments.}}

Muhammad had ordered his wives to be veiled at the time he married Zaynab,<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|95}}; Bewley/Saad 8:126-127.</ref> so the raid at al-Muraysi must have been after this. After Safwan brought Aisha back to Medina, they found themselves the focus of gossip.

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 495.|The greatest offenders were … Hamna bint Jahsh, for the reason that her sister Zaynab bint Jahsh was one of the apostle’s wives and only she could rival me in his favour. As for Zaynab, Allah protected her by her religion and she spoke nothing but good. But Hamna spread the report far and wide, opposing me for the sake of her sister.}}

This makes it very clear that Muhammad was already married to Zaynab during this controversy, which arose before the warriors had even arrived home from the al-Muraysi expedition. He married Zaynab in late 5 AH, so Ibn Ishaq’s date of 6 AH for the raid must be the correct one. It does seem odd that Aisha would give the wrong sequence for two such dramatic events as the raid at al-Muraysi and the Prophet’s marriage to Zaynab. However, it is more likely that, when asked for a date, she accidentally named the wrong expedition than that, recalling what could be considered 'the crisis of her life', she could not remember whether she had been veiled or who had been spreading gossip about her.

If Juwayriyah was 20 years old in 6 AH, she must have been born in 15 BH (between 29 December 607 and 17 December 608). That would make her only 64, not 65, at her death in 50 AH. This is not a serious discrepancy, but it does mean that one of these ages is only an approximation. On balance, the younger age is more likely to be correct. Young people are usually accurate about their ages (“When my husband was killed, I was definitely 20, not 19 or 21”) whereas the elderly are more likely to use round numbers (“I think this will be my final illness, for I’m already in my mid-60s”).

Nevertheless, to be on the safe side, we shall take a two-year range for Juwayriyah’s birthdate, between 9 January 607 and 17 December 608. The median is 28 December 607. She was married in Shabaan 6 AH, a median date of 2 January 628.

*Juwayriyah’s Median Age = 20 years and 0 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 56 years and 9 months.
*Age Difference = 36 years and 9 months.

So another one of Muhammad's wives, Juwayriyah, was young enough to be his granddaughter.

===Safiyah's Age===

[[Safiyah]] gives us unusual precision, for it appears that she knew her age to the month.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 185}}.|'''I was not even 17''', or '''I was just 17''', the night I entered the Prophet.}}

She married Muhammad at the time when Khaybar fell. The exact date of this victory is not recorded, but the general period of the siege is clear.

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 510, 511, 530|The apostle stayed in Medina during Dhu’l-Hijja and part of al-Muharram ... Then he marched against Khaybar … The apostle seized the property piece by piece and conquered the forts one by one as he came to them … The apostle took captives from them, among whom was Safiyah bint Huyayy ibn Akhtab. The apostle chose Safiyah for himself … When the apostle returned from Khaybar to Medina he stayed there from the first Rabi’ until Shawwal.}}

The Muslims therefore began the march to Khaybar in late May or early June 628 and were back in Medina before the end of July. So Muhammad married Safiyah early in Rabi-Awwal 7 AH (mid-July 628). Safiyah apparently knew that she had been born in Rabi-Awwal 17 years earlier, though she did not know whether it had been late or early in the month and therefore did not know whether she had reached 17 full years on the particular night when she married Muhammad. The Rabi-Awwal of 17 years earlier fell between 14 January and 12 February 612, giving Safiyah a birthdate of 28 January 612, plus or minus a fortnight.

*Safiyah’s Age = 16 years and 6 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 57 years and 3 months.
*Age Difference = 40 years and 9 months.

Safiyah was yet another bride who was young enough to be Muhammad’s granddaughter.

===Ramlah's Age===

It is said, citing ''Sunan Nasa’i'' vol. 1 book 1 #60 p. 127, that Ramlah (Umm Habiba) was 23 years younger than Muhammad.<ref>[http://www.muslimhope.com/WhyDidMohammedGetSoManyWives.htm/ “Why Did Mohammed Get So Many Wives?”] See also [http://www.prophetmuhammadforall.org/webfiles/downloads/wives/HUmmeHabiba.pdf/ “Hadrat Umm-e-Habiba (r.a)”] in ''Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) Guidance for Soul Satisfaction''.</ref> Since he was born in 53 BH, this would place her birth in 30 BH. If this citation is correct, it is in broad agreement with the other sources.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.|[Ramlah’s marriage] occurred in the year 7 AH. '''She was thirty-odd years old''' when she was brought to Medina.}}

{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, “Umm Habiba”] in ''The Wives of the Prophet''.|[Ramlah] married the Prophet Muhammad in 1 AH, although she did not actually come to live with him in Medina until 7 AH, when the Prophet was 60 years old and '''she was 35'''.}}

Ibn Kathir makes Muhammad 25 years older than Ramlah. This is not a serious contradiction. If Muhammad was 53 in 1 AH, then he was only 59 and not 60 in 7 AH; so calling Ramlah’s age 35 rather than 36 may also be an approximation, much like Tabari’s “thirty-odd”. Since Ibn Kathir is not a primary source, we shall be conservative and assume that “thirty-odd” means 36 and that Ramlah was born in 30 BH.

30 BH fell between 9 June 593 and 28 May 594, giving Ramlah a median birthdate of 2 December 593. Her marriage to Muhammad was consummated upon his return from Khaybar in July 628.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 526, 529-530.</ref>

*Ramlah’s Median Age at Consummation = 34 years and 7 months.
*Muhammad’s Age = 57 years and 3 months.
*Age Difference = 22 years and 8 months.

Ramlah was young enough to be Muhammad’s daughter.

===Maymunah's Age===

There are two traditions about Maymunah, neither of which makes very much sense.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 186}}.|Maymunah died in the year 61 AH during the caliphate of Yazid ibn Muawiya. She was the last of the wives of the Prophet to die, and her age was then 80 or 81.}}

This would place her death in the year between 4 October 680 and 22 September 681 and her birth in 21 or 20 BH between 4 March 602 and 10 February 604 (median = 21 February 603).

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:94|The Messenger of Allah married Maymunah bint Al-Harith in Shawwal in 7 AH.}}

This was between 4 February and 4 March 629 (median = 18 February), indicating that her age at marriage was 26, plus or minus a year.

But in fact the death-date of 61 AH might have been a mistranscription. Other sources indicate that she could not have been the last survivor of Muhammad’s widows, for Aisha outlived her, and Hind, of course, outlived Aisha.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|p. 177}}.|Zaynab was the first of the Prophet’s wives to die, and Umm Salama [Hind] was the last.}}

{{Quote|Al-Hakim al-Nishaburi, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 4 p. 32. Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' vol. 8 p. 192.|We stood on the walls of Medina, looking out … [Aisha said]: “By Allah! Maymunah is no more! She has gone, and you are left free to do whatever you like. She was the most pious of all of us and the most devoted to her relatives.”}}

While it is possible that Aisha’s remarks on Maymunah’s death are apocryphal (the sources are not particularly early), the story lends strength to an alternative tradition that Maymunah died about a decade before 61 AH.

{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, “Maymunah”] in ''The Wives of the Prophet''.|After the Prophet's death, Maymunah continued to live in Medina for another forty years, dying at the age of 80, in 51 AH [21 January 671 - 10 January 672], being the last but one of the Prophet's wives to die.}}

This is still not correct, as not one, but four or five, of Muhammad’s widows were still alive in 51 AH (Hind, Aisha, Sawdah, Safiyah and perhaps Juwayriyah). Ibn Kathir, writing 700 years after the event, was either trying to harmonise the conflict without considering all the facts – also known as “guessing” – or else blindly copying the text of someone else who did. If Ibn Kathir (or his source) guessed at which part of his original text was the error, he might also have been guessing at the year of Maymunah’s death. So we have no real confidence that the correct year was either 51 ''or'' 61 AH. The only consistency is that Maymunah lived to be about 80.

While we do not really know Maymunah’s death-date, and therefore her birth-date, we will accept Ibn Kathir’s more conservative tradition. According to this, she was born in 30 BH, i.e., between 9 June 593 and 28 May 594 (median = 2 December 593). This would make her about 35 when she married Muhammad in February 629, although we will bear in mind that she might have been many years younger.

*Maymunah's Median Age at Marriage = 35 years and 2 months.
*Muhammad’s Age at Marriage = 57 years and 10 months.
*Age Difference = 22 years and 8 months.

Sir William Muir’s unsourced comment that “Maymunah is said to have been at this time 51 years of age”<ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life4/chap22.htm/ Muir, W. (1861). ''The Life of Mahomet'' vol. 4 p. 89. London: Smith, Elder & Co.]</ref> is thus wide of the mark.

===Mulaykah's Age===

Mulaykah’s exact age is not given, but there is a clue in this statement.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|165}}.|Her clan came to the Prophet and said, “'''She is small''' and has '''no mind of her own'''; she was beguiled.”}}

If they expected Mohammed to believe that “she is too young to think for herself,” they were suggesting that she was barely an adult – someone whose body had so recently reached puberty that her mind had not yet caught up.

This makes sense in the light of the fact that Mulaykah found a new fiancé within days of her divorce from Muhammad, before she had completed her three-month waiting-period.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:106; {{Tabari|39|p. 165}}.</ref> It looks as if this man had already been a suitor before it became politically necessary for Mulaykah to marry Muhammad. If she had been courted but not married, this also suggests that she was very young.

Since the mean age of menarche was 12½ years,<ref>[http://www.mum.org/menarage.htm/ Finley, H. (2003). “Average age at menarche in various cultures.”]</ref> this indicates that Mulaykah was about 13, plus or minus a couple of years. As for the date of the wedding:

{{Quote|{{Tabari|8|p. 187}}.|In this year [8 AH] the Messenger of God married Mulaykah ... He had killed her father the day of the conquest of Mecca [14 January 630].}}

The year 8 AH did not end until 22 April 630. But in fact Muhammad must have married Mulaykah earlier than this. Her tribe lived near Mecca; they had resisted him at Mecca on 14 January; and Muhammad left Mecca on 28 January to fight the Hawazinites and Thaqifites.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 2-3}}.</ref> It is practically certain that he married Mulaykah during his fortnight of residence in the city, i.e. in the second half of January 630.

*Mulaykah’s Probable Age = about 13 years.
*Muhammad’s Age at Marriage = 58 years and 9 months.
*Age Difference = 45 years and 9 months.

While this is only a guess, we were also only guessing about Sawdah. By the time Muhammad married Mulaykah, Aisha had become 16. Although Mulaykah was an older bride, she was almost certainly younger in years than Aisha.

===Asma's Age===

Asma’s age is unknown but her age-range is clearly implied.

{{Quote|{{Tabari|39|pp. 188-189}}.|“O Messenger of Allah, shall I give you in marriage the most beautiful among the Arab widows? She had been married to a relative of hers, but he died, and she lost her way…”}}

Since Asma’s family had adopted Jewish cultural norms over a century earlier,<ref>Lecker, M. (1995). Judaism among Kinda and the Ridda of Kinda. ''Journal of the American Oriental Society, 115'', 635-650.</ref> it is safe to say that she had passed puberty at the time of her first marriage.<ref>Ezekiel 16:7-8. [http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm/ “Prohibited Marriages and Illegitimate Children”] in ''Judaism 101''.</ref> Further, the text suggests that her first husband had been dead for some months or even years. When she arrived in Medina in the summer of 630,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:103.</ref> she must have been at least 14 years old and perhaps considerably older. She displayed a dignity and sense of duty<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 189-190}}.</ref> that make her seem more mature than Mulaykah bint Kaab or Fatima bint Al-Dahhak. While this could tell us more about Asma’s education than her age (she was, after all, a princess), it is clear that she was no child-bride.

At the same time, Abdullah ibn Abbas suggests Asma’s upper age-limit.

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:103.|Ibn Abbas said: “Asma bint An-Numan was the most beautiful and '''youthful''' of the people of her time.”}}

This kind of accolade would be absurd for a woman who was older than 20. The sources do not describe Hafsah, Juwayriyah or Safiyah as “youthful,” and Asma’s naiveté certainly suggests youth.

In conclusion, Asma was probably in her late teens; but we do not really know. To be conservative, we will say that she was 20.

*Asma’s Maximum Age = 20 years and 0 months.
*Muhammad’s Age at Marriage = 59 years and 3 months.
*Age Difference = 39 years and 3 months.

Asma was once again young enough to be Muhammad’s granddaughter.

===Amrah's Age===

Amrah’s age is not stated anywhere. However, we do know the age of her first husband. He was Muhammad’s cousin, Al-Fadl ibn Abbas.<ref>Ibn Ishaq, cited in Guillaume, A. (1960). ''New Light on the Life of Muhammad'', p. 55. Manchester: Manchester University Press.</ref> Al-Fadl’s brother Abdullah recalled: “We reached Allah’s Apostle five years after he had made ''Hijra'' and were with the Quraysh when they marched during the year in which the Battle of ''Ahzab'' [Trench] was fought [627]. I was with my brother Fadl … I was then eight years old while my brother was 13.”<ref>Tabrani/Haythami vol. 6 p. 64 reported on the chain of narrators for this hadith. Cited in Khandhlawi, M. M. Y. (1959). ''Hayatus Sahaba''. Translated by Elias, A. H. (2008). ''The Lives of the Sahabah'', vol. 1, p. 373. Farid Book Depot (Pvt.) Ltd.</ref>

If Al-Fadl was 13 in 627, he was born in late 613 or 614 – that is, he was exactly the same age as Aisha. His family emigrated to Medina three years later,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 202}}.</ref> and soon afterwards, Al-Fadl petitioned Muhammad to arrange a marriage for him. Muhammad found him a wife on the same day, but it was not Amrah bint Yazid. The girl whom Al-Fadl married in 630 was his cousin, Safiya bint Mahmiyah.<ref>{{Muslim|5|2347}}.</ref>

It is a little strange that such a young man would so soon afterwards take on a second wife, but it is safe to say that he did so willingly, for Amrah was of no political importance. There is no obvious reason for this marriage beyond the documented fact that Al-Fadl was susceptible to pretty girls.<ref>See {{Bukhari||74|247}}.</ref> He was also the eldest son of a very wealthy man,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 113, 114, 309-310.</ref> so if he wanted a second wife, there was nothing to stop him taking one. It is therefore highly unlikely that Amrah was plain or that she was older than Al-Fadl. She would have been the same age as her bridegroom or a little younger.

However, Al-Fadl divorced Amrah within a matter of months, and she was afterwards married to Muhammad. While the date of this marriage is unknown, there would scarcely have been time for all these events to have occurred before January 631. Since Muhammad fell ill and then died in early June 632,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 689</ref> the latest possible date for his marriage to Amrah would be May 632. So the median wedding date is September 631. We do not know how old Amrah was in 631, but Al-Fadl was 17, so it is reasonable to suggest that Amrah was about 15 – a couple of years younger than Aisha.

*Amrah’s Probable Age = about 15 years.
*Muhammad’s Age at Marriage = 60 years and 5 months.
*Age Difference = 45 years and 5 months.

Again, this is a guess, but it is an estimate based on real data about Amrah’s life. We can make no such guesses about the remaining women in Muhammad’s life.

==Ages Unknown==

Muhammad had some kind of marriage contract with several other women, but most of these unions were dissolved before consummation. The other women with whom he is known to have had a sexual relationship are the five listed below, four of whom were technically concubines (sex [[Slavery|slaves]]) rather than legal wives. The ages of these five women are unknown.

===Rayhanah bint Zayd ibn Amr===

Rayhanah was a Jewish female from the Nadir tribe in Medina. She married a Qurazi,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 164-165}}.</ref> which means she must have been married before the Nadir tribe was banished from Medina in August 625.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 437-438, 445.</ref> As a Jew, she would not have been living with her husband before she reached menarche<ref>Ezekiel 16:7-8.</ref> or before the age of 12 years.<ref>[http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm/ “Prohibited Marriages and Illegitimate Children”] in ''Judaism 101''.</ref> So her latest possible birthdate is mid-613.

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 459, 461.|In Shawwal 5 AH … [Jibreel said]: “God commands you, Muhammad, to go to the Qurayza tribe.” … He besieged them for 25 nights until they were sore pressed, and God cast terror into their hearts.}}

These details, a siege of 25 nights starting from some time in Shawwal 5 AH (26 February - 26 March 627), place the surrender of the Qurayza between 23 March and 20 April 627. Within a day or two of the surrender came the distribution of booty.

{{Quote|Guillaume/Ishaq 466.|Then the Apostle divided the property, wives and children of the Qurayza tribe among the Muslims … The apostle had chosen one of their women for himself, Rayhanah bint Amr ibn Khunafa, one of the women of the Amr clan of the Qurayza, and she remained with him until she died, in his power.}}

So Muhammad captured Rayhanah in spring 627, a date when her youngest possible age would have been 14. She might have been considerably older than this minimum. Although secondary historians have guessed that she was about 15, this is not stated in the early sources. Since her exact age is not known, we have omitted her from the calculation.

===Mariyah bint Shamoon===

Mariyah’s age is not stated anywhere. The only certain fact is that, since she bore Muhammad a son in 630, she must have been of childbearing age.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 39, 137}}.</ref> Various guesses that she was 20<ref>[http://www.a2youth.com/ebooks/the_wives_of_the_prophet/Maymunah_bint_al-harith/ Thomson, H. A. (1993). “Maymunah bint Al-Harith”] in ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad''. London: Ta-Ha Publishers Ltd.</ref> or 17<ref>[http://www.themodernreligion.com/prophet/prophet_aisha.htm/ Ahmed, S. “Prophet Muhammad and Aisha Siddiqa.”]</ref> betray the assumptions of the secondary historians that if she attracted Muhammad, she must have been young. The truth is, they are probably right. But because we don’t ''know'' Mariyah’s age, we have omitted her from the calculation.

===Fatima ("Al-Aliya") bint Al-Dahhak===

The only objective clue to Fatima’s age is that she lived another 50 years after Muhammad divorced her.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:100</ref> Subjectively, her behaviour seems immature and suited to a child aged 15 or 16.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 187-188}}; Bewley/Saad 8:101.</ref> But because we do not know Fatima’s age, we have omitted her from the calculation.

==="Al-Jariya" and Tukanah===

These two concubines were presumably selected for their looks and were presumably young. But presumption is not fact. We do not know their ages and so we have omitted them from the calculation.

==Mean Ages==

===Muhammad’s Wives===

We can now calculate the mean age of 14 of Muhammad’s wives at the time he married them.

#Khadijah’s Median Age = 26 years and 10 months.
#Sawdah’s Approximate Age = 40 years.
#Aisha’s Median Age = 9 years and 3 months.
#Hafsah’s Median Age = 19 years and 6 months.
#Zaynab bint Khuzayma’s Median Age = 28 years and 4 months.
#Hind’s Median Age = 28 years and 6 months.
#Zaynab bint Jahsh’s Median Age = 37 years and 2 months.
#Juwayriyah’s Median Age = 20 years and 0 months.
#Safiyah’s Age = 16 years and 6 months.
#Ramlah’s Median Age = 34 years and 7 months.
#Maymunah’s Median Age = 35 years and 2 months.
#Mulaykah’s Approximate Age = 13 years.
#Asma’s Maximum Age = 20 years.
#Amrah’s Approximate Age = 15 years.
*Total Years = 343 years and 10 months.
*Mean Age of Muhammad’s Brides = ''24.56 years''

The mean age of Muhammad’s brides was about ''24½ years''. Even by the historical Arabian standards, a woman of 24 was not quite “middle-aged”.

===Muhammad as Bridegroom===

We can also calculate Muhammad’s mean age as a bridegroom. Here is his age when he consummated each of these marriages.

#Khadijah = 24 years and 3 months.
#Sawdah = 49 years and 1 month.
#Aisha = 52 years and 0 months.
#Hafsah = 53 years and 9 months.
#Zaynab bint Khuzayma = 53 years and 10 months.
#Hind = 55 years and 0 months.
#Zaynab bint Jahsh = 55 years and 11 months.
#Juwayiriyah = 56 years and 9 months.
#Safiyah = 57 years and 3 months
#Ramlah = 57 years and 3 months.
#Maymunah = 57 years and 10 months.
#Mulaykah = 58 years and 9 months.
#Asma = 59 years and 3 months (not consummated, but legalities finalised).
#Amrah = 60 years and 5 months (not consummated, but legalities finalised).
*Total Years = 751 years and 4 months.
*Mean Age of Muhammad as Bridegroom = ''53.66 years''

Muhammad’s mean age at marriage was ''53 years and 8 months''. The mean age difference between Muhammad and all his wives was over ''29 years''.

===Skewed Statistics===

Muhammad’s first marriage to Khadijah skews the statistics. She was the ''only'' wife whom Muhammad married as a young man. She was the ''only'' wife who was close to his own age, as opposed to being significantly younger. Some statisticians would exclude her as an outlier before they began the calculation.

A more serious skew of the statistics is caused by the fact that these 14 wives were not the only women whom Muhammad married. He also had four known concubines and at least one other full wife. While we do not know the ages of any of these women, we can infer a definite trend. They all seem to have been teenagers – significantly younger than the mean. If their ages could be added to the calculation, the mean age of Muhammad’s brides would be even lower, perhaps around 22 years.

Muhammad acquired these five women in the last five years of his life, so his mean age as bridegroom has to be raised. While we don’t know all of his wedding dates, the new figure would probably come to about 55 years – making the age difference between Muhammad and his “average wife” a grand mean of 33 years.

Therefore our calculation that Muhammad’s average wife was 29 years younger than himself and that she became his bride when she was 24½ has to be taken as conservative.

==Conclusion==

The widows whom Prophet Muhammad married after Khadijah’s death do indeed fall into two distinct age-groups. But to label these two groups as “the middle-aged” and “the elderly” gives atypical definitions to these terms. The “elderly” group would refer to those brides between 28 and 40 while the “middle-aged” group would mean the teenagers.

Muhammad loved Khadijah, who was the same age as himself, when they were both young. He rejected Sawdah, who was a little younger than himself, when they were both middle-aged. All his other wives were young enough to be his daughters and several were young enough to be his granddaughters. He divorced one woman before consummating the marriage<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:111</ref> and broke off another courtship<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:113</ref> solely because he decided that these women were “too old” for him, and he continued to pursue teenagers until the day he died.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:105</ref> Nor does he seem to have been embarrassed by his own preference.<ref>"''Nothing was dearer to the Prophet of Allah than a horse. Then he said: “O Allah! Excuse me, no! The women!” (i.e., not dearer than women).''" - [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 90.6/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' Vol. 1 Chapter 90:6].</ref>

The inevitable conclusion is that Muhammad preferred younger women, and the widely repeated claim that almost all of his wives were elderly has no basis in historical fact.

==See Also==

* [[Muhammad's Wives]]'' - A hub page that leads to other articles related to Muhammad's wives and concubines''

==References==
{{Reflist|30em}}

[[Category:Muhammad]]
[[Category:Islam and Women]]
[[Category:Islamic Propaganda]]
{{page_title|Ages of Muhammad's Wives at Marriage}}

Muhammad's Marriages

2013-07-14T05:08:28Z

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-24T13:31:24Z

1234567: /* Circumstances of the Marriage */

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was the [[Muhammad| Prophet Muhammad’s]] seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to [[Mecca]] and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza’a tribe. [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that Asad’s family were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab’s children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists members of Riyab’s clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab’s son Jahsh married Umama (or Umayma) bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their six children were Muhammad’s first cousins.

# '''Abd''' was the eldest son. As an adult he was always known by his ''kunya'' '''Abu Ahmad'''.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>
# '''Abdullah''' was the second son.
# '''Zaynab''' was born c. 590.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81.</ref> The birth-order of the daughters is not really known, but Zaynab appears to have been the only one who married before Islam.<ref>Both her sisters married prominent Muslims, suggesting that these marriages occurred after they had all converted to Islam. Zaynab would have been over twenty years old by then, and her husband appears to have remained a pagan, suggesting that they were already married before Islam. Of course, marriage-order is not proof of birth-order.</ref>
# '''Ubaydullah''' (“little Abdullah”) was the third son.
# '''Habibah''' was also known as '''Umm Habib'''. Both are feminine forms of the masculine ''Habib'' (“beloved”).
# '''Hamnah''' was probably the youngest child.<ref>Her first husband was born in 594 and her second husband in 595, suggesting that she was not older than this.</ref>

It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.<ref></ref>

Her eldest brother Abd was born blind. “He used to go all round Mecca from top to bottom without anyone to lead him. He was a poet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>

The Jahsh family lived under the patronage of Abu Sufyan and were on visiting terms with the best society in Mecca.

When they were teenagers, Ubaydullah came under the influence of the monotheist Zayd ibn Amr.<ref></ref> Zayd was nastily murdered sometime before 610.<ref></ref>

===First Marriage===

Zaynab’s eldest brother married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Al-Faraa, and Ubaydullah married his daughter Ramlah.<ref></ref> As far as we know, Abu Sufyan did not arrange a marriage for the middle brother Abdullah.

Zaynab was also married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72; {{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: “''Zaynab bint Jahsh ... said, 'O Messenger of God, I cannot give my consent, for I am a widow of the Quraysh.’''” Strictly speaking, these words do not even prove ''how many'' husbands Zaynab had already had. It is in theory possible that she was married more than once in Mecca although, to be parsimonious, we shall here assume that there was only one husband.</ref> He was a Quraysh, but probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab’s declaration that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was asserted in order to emphasise his high social status; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca. It is safe to say, however, that Zaynab’s bridegroom was approved, or even chosen, by Abu Sufyan, and that he was deemed a person suitable to marry into the family favoured by the Umayyads.<ref></ref>

Her husband’s anonymity is decidedly strange. All the previous husbands of Muhammad’s other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. The lists include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Tabari|9|pp. 127-135}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 163-165, 169-186}}.</ref> The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow “embarrassing,” so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab’s first husband is missing from the list. It is more likely because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, the information had been lost. If nobody remembered the man’s name, this suggests that Zaynab did not talk about him very much. Perhaps she had loved him so much or hated him so much that she could not bear to speak about him; or perhaps the marriage had been so short-lived, or he had spent so much of it travelling away from home, that he had made very little impression on her. But Zaynab is not the only silent person here. Other people must have known her first husband: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayyad kin, their friends who emigrated with them. Yet none of them speaks a word, either good or bad.

We can take two educated guesses about Zaynab’s married life. Firstly, she became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from textiles and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of the Jahsh family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca’s many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> she must have enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Secondly, it appears that she had a child. She was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). “Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: “her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means “Mother of the Judge”. There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was not a by-name but a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. It is unlikely that Zaynab had any further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref> Although the reason for her secondary infertility cannot be known, a modern doctor would suspect the Rhesus negative condition.<ref></ref> There is further evidence for a hereditary condition of this type in that her sister Habibah was also childless.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:171.</ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was about twenty years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Another cousin, Abu Salama ibn Abdulasad, was among the earliest converts to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in Ibn Ishaq’s list of “those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr’s invitation,” but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615.<ref></ref> This suggests that Zaynab was converted<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref> under the influence of her brothers.

Zaynab’s single siblings soon married into the small Muslim community: Abdullah to the Hilal widow Zaynab bint Khuzayma, “Mother of the Poor”;<ref></ref> Habibah to the newly divorced<ref></ref> Abdulrahman ibn Awf,<ref></ref> a wealthy merchant<ref></ref> who was related to Muhammad’s mother;<ref></ref> and Hamnah to Masood ibn Umayr,<ref></ref> a blue-eyed<ref></ref> rich boy<ref></ref> from the Abduldar clan.<ref></ref> Abu Sufyan’s daughters, the wives of Abu Ahmad<ref></ref> and Ubaydullah,<ref></ref> also became Muslims; but the lists of early converts do not include anyone who could have plausibly been Zaynab’s husband. While the lists specifically mention those men whose widows later married Muhammad,<ref></ref> there is no such notice about Zaynab, so her husband probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama did not become a Muslim either.<ref>The biographies of Abdulmuttalib’s six daughters in Bewley/Saad 8:29 state that Safiya, Arwa and Atiqa became Muslims but say nothing about Umm Hakim, Barrah or Umama. {{Tabari|39|p. 198}} explains that Umm Hakim died before Islam; however, Umama was still alive in 628 (REF).</ref>

After 613 the Quraysh began a campaign of persecuting vulnerable Muslims.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s family was under the protection of Abu Sufyan and therefore the worst that could be done to them was that their businesses were boycotted, though apparently not very systematically.<ref></ref> In 615 Abdullah, Ubaydullah and their two brothers-in-law joined the emigration to Abyssinia.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s father Jahsh also left Mecca, although apparently not as part of the general exile to Abyssinia. As it happened, Jahsh never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Ubaydullah took his wife to Abyssinia with him,<ref>It is not certain that Abdullah was still married; he divorced Zaynab bint Khuzayma at some unknown date (REF).</ref> but Zaynab’s two sisters were left behind. This was apparently because the journey to Abyssinia was deemed a terrible sacrifice and hardship,<ref></ref> and women were not subjected to it if they would be safe in Mecca.<ref>The emigrants included eighty-three men but only eighteen women, all of them married. Many of these men would have been single, but several who are known to have been married did not take their wives to Abyssinia.</ref> It is not entirely clear who was protecting Zaynab and her sisters; but no harm befell them, so perhaps the Quraysh assumed that men were the real problem and did not target women. After most of the persecuted slaves recanted their faith,<ref></ref> the Quraysh declared a trade boycott on Muhammad’s clan;<ref></ref> they showed no interest in the handful of women who had married absent or respectable pagan men.

Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia until his death in 627.<ref></ref> but Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619.<ref></ref> He must have married Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh soon after his return.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173.</ref> His choice reflects a certain carelessness towards the Umayyads: Fatima was a member of the Asad clan (her father had been Khadijah’s first cousin)<ref></ref> so Abdullah was reverting to the original alliance that his grandfather had rejected forty years earlier. To emphasise the point, the couple named their son Muhammad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq shows that the baby was born by the time they left Mecca in 621.</ref>

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 213.</ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. Abu Ahmad’s wife begged to go “anywhere but Medina,” but he told her that Islam was more important than family ties and composed poetry about their argument.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215-217.</ref> By this time Zaynab was a widow,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215 lists the people whom Abdullah took with him, but none of them could plausibly have been Zaynab’s spouse. However, the list is not necessarily complete; in particular, it probably does not name all the women.</ref> although there is no information about when or how her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref>

Although it was a large party of at least twenty-eight people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> He locked up the house, leaving citizens who passed it to sigh over “its doors blowing to and fro, empty of inhabitants” and pontificate that, “''Every house however long its prosperity lasts will one day be overtaken by misfortune and trouble.'' The house of the Jahsh clan has become tenantless.” Abu Jahl said, “Nobody will weep over that. This is the work of this man’s nephew [Muhammad]. He has divided our community, disrupted our affairs, and driven a wedge between us.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215.</ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house and sold it to pay off his own debts.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> Abdullah was angry about this, saying that his family had chosen to ally with Abu Sufyan when they had received plenty of good offers from other Quraysh families.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> He asked Muhammad for justice; but Muhammad, busy in Medina and powerless to act in Mecca, told him to be content that Allah would give him a better house in Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref>. Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but there is some evidence that he had in fact been acting within his rights. Eight years later, when Muhammad conquered Mecca and could have easily commandeered any building that he wanted, Abu Ahmed again asked him to retrieve their house, but Muhammad ignored him. Other people told him, “You lost your house in Allah’s service, so don’t ask the Apostle about it again.” This lack of sympathy for the Jahsh family’s case suggests that Abu Sufyan had only lent, leased or given them the property on the understanding that they were his allies. By abandoning the house in order to ally so openly with Muhammad, who had declared war on Mecca,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 208.</ref> Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection. It seemed that nobody, including even the Muslims, disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally. All Abu Ahmad could do about it was to write another poem, along the lines of: “''I swear Abu Sufyan will regret this; may his theft stick to him like the ring of a dove…''”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref>

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with one of her brothers. Hamnah bore a daughter<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170.</ref> but Habibah remained childless.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:171.</ref> Muhammad did not arrive until September 622, more than a year later.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 227, 281.</ref> He built the mosque;<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref>These debates are described in detail in Guillaume/Ishaq 239-270.</ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, the raid under Abdullah’s leadership being the first in which a Muslim killed a Meccan and succeeded in stealing the merchandise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 286-289.</ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and Zaynab assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother thought at first that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage … they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself.”</ref>

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. While he was in fact planning to marry, his choice had fallen on Hafsah bint Umar,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.</ref> who was less beautiful than Zaynab<ref>Unlike Zaynab, Hafsa is never described as “beautiful,” and nor is it ever claimed that she was the reverse.</ref> but better educated<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “"Hafsah, the wife of the Prophet (SA), could write … `A'ishah (the wife of the Prophet) could read but not write, and Umm Salamah stood in a similar condition."” By implication, no other wife of Muhammad could even read.</ref> and some fifteen years younger.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.</ref> Shortly afterwards, he also married Zaynab bint Khuzaymah,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:82.</ref> and he then ruled that four wives were the maximum allowed.<ref>{{Quran|4|3}}. See also [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=718&Itemid=59/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q4:3].</ref> Muhammad could not have rejected Zaynab more thoroughly. His proposal was that she should marry his adopted son Zayd.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out.”</ref>

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. His father and uncle came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad then took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.<ref></ref>

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until about 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

So Zayd already had two wives, not counting his divorced wife and his future heavenly bride, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. It is not mentioned whether anyone had asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife. The person who did not co-operate was Zaynab.

The reason Zaynab gave for refusing the proposal was “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}; Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> This probably meant that she considered herself too highborn to marry a former slave. Perhaps this reflects the insecurity of Zaynab’s ''nouveau riche'' origins – she was an Umayyad and yet not an Umayyad. But even if she was not fully Umayyad, her mother and first husband had still been fully Quraysh, while Zayd was not even Meccan.<ref>The Quraysh were the “nobility” of Mecca, but other tribes lived there too. The wealthy Hilal might be considered the equivalent of the “bourgeoisie”, while the Khuza’a were merely respectable. Residents from other tribes tended to be poor; they protected themselves by becoming the vassals of the important people. Lowest in the social pyramid was the slave class.</ref> The Meccans could be snobbish about “foreigners”, even if they were third-generation immigrants like Zaynab.<ref></ref> If Zaynab married a newcomer like Zayd, as if she did not deserve anyone “better,” there would be a permanent spotlight on her own foreign origins.

Zaynab did not mention Zayd’s physical appearance, but it is possible that she had further objections in that direction. First, he was ugly,<ref></ref> and she might have felt a simple physical repulsion. Second, although he traced his ancestry to an Arab tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 6}}.</ref> this might well have been by adoption rather than biology, for his “flat nose” and “very dark skin”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> suggest that his genes were from Africa. The Arabs could be very racist about this. For example, Muhammad once said, “You should listen to and obey your ruler even if he was an Ethiopian slave whose head looks like a raisin.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|89|256}}.</ref> Although it was officially a lesson in being “not racist,” the remark assumes that black people and slaves are inferior, and it was made because Muhammad expected his Arab audience to make a similar assumption.

While it does not reflect well on Zaynab that she would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that she had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, she should not have needed to justify her reason. Finally, it must be stressed that Zaynab was being asked to accept the position of third wife. Added to the other social humiliations of the proposed union, this made the offer close to insulting. There were still plenty of bachelors in the emigrant community,<ref></ref> and all her siblings were at that date in monogamous marriages.<ref></ref>

Abdullah supported his sister’s refusal.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|249}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|829}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|6883}}.</ref>

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref> But for some reason he was determined that this marriage should take place. He announced a revelation from Allah: “''It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error.''”<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}. Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36: “This was revealed regarding Abdullah ibn Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this …”</ref> In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned. The traditional view is that Abdullah and Zaynab eventually “consented because of the verse,”<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> a situation that might be deemed spiritual blackmail.

====Reasons for the Marriage====

The Syrian scholar Ibn Kathir proposed that Muhammad arranged the marriage of Zayd and Zaynab to show that class distinctions were abolished in Islam. “The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered.”<ref>[http://www.angelfire.com/on/ummiby1/wives3.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''.]</ref>

There is little evidence, however, that Muhammad really thought that way. He certainly did not explain at the time why Zayd and Zaynab would have “made a good couple”. The only reason he gave Zaynab was, “I want you to marry him.”<ref></ref> If Muhammad really had wanted to promote marriage across the social divide, it would have made more sense to support a naturally occurring example, i.e., to praise two people from different backgrounds who wanted to marry each other despite the disapproval of the wealthier family or favoured race. But he did not; rather, he taught that a woman needed her guardian’s consent for a marriage to be valid.<ref></ref> Since families in seventh-century Arabia (as in most other cultures throughout history) usually arranged marriages to maximise economic advantage to both families, the practical result was that most people married someone of a similar social background. Muhammad openly admitted that money and social connections were two of the main reasons why anyone would marry<ref>The other two reasons were physical attraction and good character. He did concede that character was the best motive of the four, although there is no evidence that he selected any of his own wives primarily for that reason.</ref> and did not in any way criticise this attitude. By pressuring Zaynab into marrying a man whom she did not want, Muhammad was setting up an unhappy marriage. If he was demonstrating anything at all about social differences, it was therefore the opposite point – that marriage across the social divide is ''not'' a good idea.

There were no obvious political or economic reasons why Zayd and Zaynab needed to marry. Zayd was presumably living off his second wife’s date-orchard, while Zaynab supported herself through her leather-crafts. They were already on the same side of every political situation – both strong supporters of Muhammad – and a closer alliance between them would not in any way promote a stronger loyalty to Muhammad. While we do not really know why Muhammad was so insistent about this marriage, we can only guess that he did it to please Zayd. Again, while we do not know why Zayd wanted to marry Zaynab, she was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> The date is not given, but it was after 20 January 625<ref>XXX states that the marriage lasted less than two (lunar) years, and the divorce date was 29 December 626.</ref> and before 22 March 625.<ref>Since it is specifically stated that Abdullah consented, he must have been alive at the time.</ref> Muhammad paid the dower.<ref></ref>

The fortunes of the Jahsh family suffered a major setback at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625. Muhammad suffered the worst defeat of his career when his army was routed and decimated.<ref></ref> Zaynab lost three family members. Her sister Hamnah, who had served as a battle auxiliary, met the returning army to ask about casualties, and Muhammad told her, “Hamnah, expect that your brother Abdullah will be rewarded.” Hamnah dutifully responded, “We belong to Allah and to him we return.” Then Muhammad told her, “Hamnah, expect that your uncle Hamza will be rewarded.” Hamnah repeated, “We belong to Allah and to him we return.” Then Muhammad told her, “Hamnah, expect that your husband Musaab will be rewarded.” Hamnah then exclaimed, “Oh, loss! His children are orphans!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170.</ref> The Meccans had cut off the ears and noses of Abdullah and his uncle Hamza, and Abu Sufyan’s wife had even chewed Hamza’s liver.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 385-386, 388, 401.</ref>

Muhammad decreed that the women could only mourn their relatives (other than a husband) for three days. After the three days were over, Zaynab received a condolence visit from the daughter of her cousin Abu Salama.<ref>Abu Salama and Zaynab were the offspring of two sisters. His daughter, also named Zaynab, would have been about nine years old and was perhaps reporting on the health of her father, who had been wounded at Uhud.</ref> In front of her guest, Zaynab made a show of asking for perfume and anointing herself, then explaining that she did not really want the perfume but that she was officially out of mourning.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}. The ''hadith'' does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmad, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned and whom, by the time of his death, she had not seen for twelve years. So it almost certainly refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.</ref> The prohibition on displays of grief must have been hard for the bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The specific loss for Zaynab, however, was that her brother Abdullah had been willing to support her against Muhammad’s wishes; now she had lost her protector just as she found herself married to a man whom she disliked.

It is sometimes claimed that the defeat at Uhud created a great social problem because there were so many widows to support. It is even claimed that the excess of widows was the reason why polygamy became necessary.<ref></ref> However, of the seventy Muslims who were killed, sixty-six were from Medina and only four were Meccan immigrants.<ref></ref> The community was accustomed to losing men to the tribal wars<ref></ref> and there was already a system in place to ensure the rights of widows, largely based on the assumption that most families owned some farmland.<ref></ref> Muhammad did have to adjudicate a few civil cases in which widows or orphans were being cheated by their relatives;<ref></ref> and perhaps a few of the poorest families had to join the beggars on the mosque Bench.<ref></ref> But there is no evidence at all that Medina was suddenly swamped by seventy desperate widows; it is even claimed that only thirty of the dead men had been married, suggesting that the city would also have had several surviving bachelors. The real problem for Muhammad was that his hosts in Medina had taken a great hit on his behalf and he was at risk of losing their sympathy. This would have bothered him far more than the issue of the widows.<ref></ref>

Hamnah had barely completed her ''idda'' before she was remarried to Talhah ibn Ubaydullah, a wealthy<ref></ref> thirty-year-old<ref></ref> bachelor who was kin to Abu Bakr.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170.</ref> Although he later became a polygamist, Hamnah was his only wife for several years.<ref></ref> Hamza’s widow also found a new husband,<ref></ref> but Abdullah’s widow never remarried; she had a bleeding disorder that raised doubts about her ritual cleanness.<ref></ref>

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>[http://www.al-islam.org/hayat-al-qulub-vol2-allamah-muhammad-baqir-al-majlisi/ Majlisi, ''Hayat al-Qulub'' 53] states that she was “in the bath.” This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources; and Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab’s movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

“In this year the Messenger married Zaynab bint Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd ibn Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|pp. 1-2}}.</ref>

When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Anas narrated. Zayd ibn Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), ‘Fear Allah and keep your wife.’” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart what Allah was about to reveal. He was to reveal thy love for her and that, should Zayd part with her, thou wouldst marry her, and thou fearedst that people would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’ But it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had finished with her, after the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there might be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.”<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Bukhari||60|310}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref> Thabit confirmed that this verse “was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd ibn Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref> Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

“When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.” When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37.|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So he desired her and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd who then understood (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Zayd left her, and she became free.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref> Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref>
“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muslims have not adopted children since that day. Muslim couples can still foster children as an act of charity, but these children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological relatives.

Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, “While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Aisha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.””<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. The traditional view is that Allah commanded Muhammad to marry Zaynab. There was no need to seek a reason. It was Allah’s will.

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

Traditional Muslims have no problem with this story. Since Muhammad was the “perfect man,” anything he did must have been by definition an “excellent example”. But it has made Westernised Muslims uncomfortable. They have tried to deny that it happened.

"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad continued to find wives for Zayd. In 628, at Muhammad’s order, he married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and probably much younger.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:162-163.</ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr’s sister (and Khadijah’s niece) Hind.<ref></ref> Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmad married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> "The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref> No unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.

When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.

Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.”

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref> “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.” She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. Zaynab’s house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks. The subsequent houses were also of palm-branches, but Zaynab’s was unique because it was the only one of the nine that was built with an attic (''mashruba'') that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}; {{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref> Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref> Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref> Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref> Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah<ref> Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref> – in that order – and that his least-favourite was Sawdah. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was fervent in prayer. “It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.” IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawdah’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawdah was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawdah was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again. Muhammad’s widows needed Umar’s permission to leave the city, and he never gave this.<ref></ref>

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref> Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref> Umar prayed at Zaynab’s funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmad carried her into her grave.<ref></ref> She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that “it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

''When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref>

{{Quote|[http://www.a2youth.com/ebooks/the_wives_of_the_prophet/zainab_bint_jahash/ Thompson, A. (DATE). “Zainab bint Jahash” in ''The Wives of the Prophet''. London: Ta-Ha Publishers.|The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-24T13:28:25Z

1234567:

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was the [[Muhammad| Prophet Muhammad’s]] seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to [[Mecca]] and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza’a tribe. [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that Asad’s family were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab’s children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists members of Riyab’s clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab’s son Jahsh married Umama (or Umayma) bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their six children were Muhammad’s first cousins.

# '''Abd''' was the eldest son. As an adult he was always known by his ''kunya'' '''Abu Ahmad'''.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>
# '''Abdullah''' was the second son.
# '''Zaynab''' was born c. 590.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81.</ref> The birth-order of the daughters is not really known, but Zaynab appears to have been the only one who married before Islam.<ref>Both her sisters married prominent Muslims, suggesting that these marriages occurred after they had all converted to Islam. Zaynab would have been over twenty years old by then, and her husband appears to have remained a pagan, suggesting that they were already married before Islam. Of course, marriage-order is not proof of birth-order.</ref>
# '''Ubaydullah''' (“little Abdullah”) was the third son.
# '''Habibah''' was also known as '''Umm Habib'''. Both are feminine forms of the masculine ''Habib'' (“beloved”).
# '''Hamnah''' was probably the youngest child.<ref>Her first husband was born in 594 and her second husband in 595, suggesting that she was not older than this.</ref>

It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.<ref></ref>

Her eldest brother Abd was born blind. “He used to go all round Mecca from top to bottom without anyone to lead him. He was a poet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>

The Jahsh family lived under the patronage of Abu Sufyan and were on visiting terms with the best society in Mecca.

When they were teenagers, Ubaydullah came under the influence of the monotheist Zayd ibn Amr.<ref></ref> Zayd was nastily murdered sometime before 610.<ref></ref>

===First Marriage===

Zaynab’s eldest brother married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Al-Faraa, and Ubaydullah married his daughter Ramlah.<ref></ref> As far as we know, Abu Sufyan did not arrange a marriage for the middle brother Abdullah.

Zaynab was also married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72; {{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: “''Zaynab bint Jahsh ... said, 'O Messenger of God, I cannot give my consent, for I am a widow of the Quraysh.’''” Strictly speaking, these words do not even prove ''how many'' husbands Zaynab had already had. It is in theory possible that she was married more than once in Mecca although, to be parsimonious, we shall here assume that there was only one husband.</ref> He was a Quraysh, but probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab’s declaration that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was asserted in order to emphasise his high social status; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca. It is safe to say, however, that Zaynab’s bridegroom was approved, or even chosen, by Abu Sufyan, and that he was deemed a person suitable to marry into the family favoured by the Umayyads.<ref></ref>

Her husband’s anonymity is decidedly strange. All the previous husbands of Muhammad’s other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. The lists include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Tabari|9|pp. 127-135}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 163-165, 169-186}}.</ref> The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow “embarrassing,” so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab’s first husband is missing from the list. It is more likely because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, the information had been lost. If nobody remembered the man’s name, this suggests that Zaynab did not talk about him very much. Perhaps she had loved him so much or hated him so much that she could not bear to speak about him; or perhaps the marriage had been so short-lived, or he had spent so much of it travelling away from home, that he had made very little impression on her. But Zaynab is not the only silent person here. Other people must have known her first husband: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayyad kin, their friends who emigrated with them. Yet none of them speaks a word, either good or bad.

We can take two educated guesses about Zaynab’s married life. Firstly, she became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from textiles and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of the Jahsh family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca’s many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> she must have enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Secondly, it appears that she had a child. She was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). “Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: “her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means “Mother of the Judge”. There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was not a by-name but a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. It is unlikely that Zaynab had any further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref> Although the reason for her secondary infertility cannot be known, a modern doctor would suspect the Rhesus negative condition.<ref></ref> There is further evidence for a hereditary condition of this type in that her sister Habibah was also childless.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:171.</ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was about twenty years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Another cousin, Abu Salama ibn Abdulasad, was among the earliest converts to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in Ibn Ishaq’s list of “those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr’s invitation,” but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615.<ref></ref> This suggests that Zaynab was converted<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref> under the influence of her brothers.

Zaynab’s single siblings soon married into the small Muslim community: Abdullah to the Hilal widow Zaynab bint Khuzayma, “Mother of the Poor”;<ref></ref> Habibah to the newly divorced<ref></ref> Abdulrahman ibn Awf,<ref></ref> a wealthy merchant<ref></ref> who was related to Muhammad’s mother;<ref></ref> and Hamnah to Masood ibn Umayr,<ref></ref> a blue-eyed<ref></ref> rich boy<ref></ref> from the Abduldar clan.<ref></ref> Abu Sufyan’s daughters, the wives of Abu Ahmad<ref></ref> and Ubaydullah,<ref></ref> also became Muslims; but the lists of early converts do not include anyone who could have plausibly been Zaynab’s husband. While the lists specifically mention those men whose widows later married Muhammad,<ref></ref> there is no such notice about Zaynab, so her husband probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama did not become a Muslim either.<ref>The biographies of Abdulmuttalib’s six daughters in Bewley/Saad 8:29 state that Safiya, Arwa and Atiqa became Muslims but say nothing about Umm Hakim, Barrah or Umama. {{Tabari|39|p. 198}} explains that Umm Hakim died before Islam; however, Umama was still alive in 628 (REF).</ref>

After 613 the Quraysh began a campaign of persecuting vulnerable Muslims.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s family was under the protection of Abu Sufyan and therefore the worst that could be done to them was that their businesses were boycotted, though apparently not very systematically.<ref></ref> In 615 Abdullah, Ubaydullah and their two brothers-in-law joined the emigration to Abyssinia.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s father Jahsh also left Mecca, although apparently not as part of the general exile to Abyssinia. As it happened, Jahsh never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Ubaydullah took his wife to Abyssinia with him,<ref>It is not certain that Abdullah was still married; he divorced Zaynab bint Khuzayma at some unknown date (REF).</ref> but Zaynab’s two sisters were left behind. This was apparently because the journey to Abyssinia was deemed a terrible sacrifice and hardship,<ref></ref> and women were not subjected to it if they would be safe in Mecca.<ref>The emigrants included eighty-three men but only eighteen women, all of them married. Many of these men would have been single, but several who are known to have been married did not take their wives to Abyssinia.</ref> It is not entirely clear who was protecting Zaynab and her sisters; but no harm befell them, so perhaps the Quraysh assumed that men were the real problem and did not target women. After most of the persecuted slaves recanted their faith,<ref></ref> the Quraysh declared a trade boycott on Muhammad’s clan;<ref></ref> they showed no interest in the handful of women who had married absent or respectable pagan men.

Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia until his death in 627.<ref></ref> but Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619.<ref></ref> He must have married Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh soon after his return.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173.</ref> His choice reflects a certain carelessness towards the Umayyads: Fatima was a member of the Asad clan (her father had been Khadijah’s first cousin)<ref></ref> so Abdullah was reverting to the original alliance that his grandfather had rejected forty years earlier. To emphasise the point, the couple named their son Muhammad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq shows that the baby was born by the time they left Mecca in 621.</ref>

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 213.</ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. Abu Ahmad’s wife begged to go “anywhere but Medina,” but he told her that Islam was more important than family ties and composed poetry about their argument.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215-217.</ref> By this time Zaynab was a widow,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215 lists the people whom Abdullah took with him, but none of them could plausibly have been Zaynab’s spouse. However, the list is not necessarily complete; in particular, it probably does not name all the women.</ref> although there is no information about when or how her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref>

Although it was a large party of at least twenty-eight people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> He locked up the house, leaving citizens who passed it to sigh over “its doors blowing to and fro, empty of inhabitants” and pontificate that, “''Every house however long its prosperity lasts will one day be overtaken by misfortune and trouble.'' The house of the Jahsh clan has become tenantless.” Abu Jahl said, “Nobody will weep over that. This is the work of this man’s nephew [Muhammad]. He has divided our community, disrupted our affairs, and driven a wedge between us.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215.</ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house and sold it to pay off his own debts.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> Abdullah was angry about this, saying that his family had chosen to ally with Abu Sufyan when they had received plenty of good offers from other Quraysh families.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> He asked Muhammad for justice; but Muhammad, busy in Medina and powerless to act in Mecca, told him to be content that Allah would give him a better house in Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref>. Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but there is some evidence that he had in fact been acting within his rights. Eight years later, when Muhammad conquered Mecca and could have easily commandeered any building that he wanted, Abu Ahmed again asked him to retrieve their house, but Muhammad ignored him. Other people told him, “You lost your house in Allah’s service, so don’t ask the Apostle about it again.” This lack of sympathy for the Jahsh family’s case suggests that Abu Sufyan had only lent, leased or given them the property on the understanding that they were his allies. By abandoning the house in order to ally so openly with Muhammad, who had declared war on Mecca,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 208.</ref> Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection. It seemed that nobody, including even the Muslims, disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally. All Abu Ahmad could do about it was to write another poem, along the lines of: “''I swear Abu Sufyan will regret this; may his theft stick to him like the ring of a dove…''”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref>

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with one of her brothers. Hamnah bore a daughter<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170.</ref> but Habibah remained childless.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:171.</ref> Muhammad did not arrive until September 622, more than a year later.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 227, 281.</ref> He built the mosque;<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref>These debates are described in detail in Guillaume/Ishaq 239-270.</ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, the raid under Abdullah’s leadership being the first in which a Muslim killed a Meccan and succeeded in stealing the merchandise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 286-289.</ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and Zaynab assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother thought at first that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage … they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself.”</ref>

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. While he was in fact planning to marry, his choice had fallen on Hafsah bint Umar,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.</ref> who was less beautiful than Zaynab<ref>Unlike Zaynab, Hafsa is never described as “beautiful,” and nor is it ever claimed that she was the reverse.</ref> but better educated<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “"Hafsah, the wife of the Prophet (SA), could write … `A'ishah (the wife of the Prophet) could read but not write, and Umm Salamah stood in a similar condition."” By implication, no other wife of Muhammad could even read.</ref> and some fifteen years younger.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.</ref> Shortly afterwards, he also married Zaynab bint Khuzaymah,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:82.</ref> and he then ruled that four wives were the maximum allowed.<ref>{{Quran|4|3}}. See also [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=718&Itemid=59/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q4:3].</ref> Muhammad could not have rejected Zaynab more thoroughly. His proposal was that she should marry his adopted son Zayd.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out.”</ref>

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. His father and uncle came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad then took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.<ref></ref>

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until about 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

So Zayd already had two wives, not counting his divorced wife and his future heavenly bride, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. It is not mentioned whether anyone had asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife. The person who did not co-operate was Zaynab.

The reason Zaynab gave for refusing the proposal was “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}; Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> This probably meant that she considered herself too highborn to marry a former slave. Perhaps this reflects the insecurity of Zaynab’s ''nouveau riche'' origins – she was an Umayyad and yet not an Umayyad. But even if she was not fully Umayyad, her mother and first husband had still been fully Quraysh, while Zayd was not even Meccan.<ref>The Quraysh were the “nobility” of Mecca, but other tribes lived there too. The wealthy Hilal might be considered the equivalent of the “bourgeoisie”, while the Khuza’a were merely respectable. Residents from other tribes tended to be poor; they protected themselves by becoming the vassals of the important people. Lowest in the social pyramid was the slave class.</ref> The Meccans could be snobbish about “foreigners”, even if they were third-generation immigrants like Zaynab.<ref></ref> If Zaynab married a newcomer like Zayd, as if she did not deserve anyone “better,” there would be a permanent spotlight on her own foreign origins.

Zaynab did not mention Zayd’s physical appearance, but it is possible that she had further objections in that direction. First, he was ugly,<ref></ref> and she might have felt a simple physical repulsion. Second, although he traced his ancestry to an Arab tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 6}}.</ref> this might well have been by adoption rather than biology, for his “flat nose” and “very dark skin”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> suggest that his genes were from Africa. The Arabs could be very racist about this. For example, Muhammad once said, “You should listen to and obey your ruler even if he was an Ethiopian slave whose head looks like a raisin.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|89|256}}.</ref> Although it was officially a lesson in being “not racist,” the remark assumes that black people and slaves are inferior, and it was made because Muhammad expected his Arab audience to make a similar assumption.

While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab that she would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that she had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, she should not have needed to justify her reason. Finally, it must be stressed that Zaynab was being asked to accept the position of third wife. Added to the other social humiliations of the proposed union, this made the offer close to insulting. There were still plenty of bachelors in the emigrant community,<ref></ref> and all her siblings were at that date in monogamous marriages.<ref></ref>

Abdullah supported his sister’s refusal.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|249}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|829}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|6883}}.</ref>

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref> But for some reason he was determined that this marriage should take place. He announced a revelation from Allah: “''It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error.''”<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}. Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36: “This was revealed regarding Abdullah ibn Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this …”</ref> In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned. The traditional view is that Abdullah and Zaynab eventually “consented because of the verse,”<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> a situation that might be deemed spiritual blackmail.

====Reasons for the Marriage====

The Syrian scholar Ibn Kathir proposed that Muhammad arranged the marriage of Zayd and Zaynab to show that class distinctions were abolished in Islam. “The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered.”<ref>[http://www.angelfire.com/on/ummiby1/wives3.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''.]</ref>

There is little evidence, however, that Muhammad really thought that way. He certainly did not explain at the time why Zayd and Zaynab would have “made a good couple”. The only reason he gave Zaynab was, “I want you to marry him.”<ref></ref> If Muhammad really had wanted to promote marriage across the social divide, it would have made more sense to support a naturally occurring example, i.e., to praise two people from different backgrounds who wanted to marry each other despite the disapproval of the wealthier family or favoured race. But he did not; rather, he taught that a woman needed her guardian’s consent for a marriage to be valid.<ref></ref> Since families in seventh-century Arabia (as in most other cultures throughout history) usually arranged marriages to maximise economic advantage to both families, the practical result was that most people married someone of a similar social background. Muhammad openly admitted that money and social connections were two of the main reasons why anyone would marry<ref>The other two reasons were physical attraction and good character. He did concede that character was the best motive of the four, although there is no evidence that he selected any of his own wives primarily for that reason.</ref> and did not in any way criticise this attitude. By pressuring Zaynab into marrying a man whom she did not want, Muhammad was setting up an unhappy marriage. If he was demonstrating anything at all about social differences, it was therefore the opposite point – that marriage across the social divide is ''not'' a good idea.

There were no obvious political or economic reasons why Zayd and Zaynab needed to marry. Zayd was presumably living off his second wife’s date-orchard, while Zaynab supported herself through her leather-crafts. They were already on the same side of every political situation – both strong supporters of Muhammad – and a closer alliance between them would not in any way promote a stronger loyalty to Muhammad. While we do not really know why Muhammad was so insistent about this marriage, we can only guess that he did it to please Zayd. Again, while we do not know why Zayd wanted to marry Zaynab, she was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> The date is not given, but it was after 20 January 625<ref>XXX states that the marriage lasted less than two (lunar) years, and the divorce date was 29 December 626.</ref> and before 22 March 625.<ref>Since it is specifically stated that Abdullah consented, he must have been alive at the time.</ref> Muhammad paid the dower.<ref></ref>

The fortunes of the Jahsh family suffered a major setback at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625. Muhammad suffered the worst defeat of his career when his army was routed and decimated.<ref></ref> Zaynab lost three family members. Her sister Hamnah, who had served as a battle auxiliary, met the returning army to ask about casualties, and Muhammad told her, “Hamnah, expect that your brother Abdullah will be rewarded.” Hamnah dutifully responded, “We belong to Allah and to him we return.” Then Muhammad told her, “Hamnah, expect that your uncle Hamza will be rewarded.” Hamnah repeated, “We belong to Allah and to him we return.” Then Muhammad told her, “Hamnah, expect that your husband Musaab will be rewarded.” Hamnah then exclaimed, “Oh, loss! His children are orphans!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170.</ref> The Meccans had cut off the ears and noses of Abdullah and his uncle Hamza, and Abu Sufyan’s wife had even chewed Hamza’s liver.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 385-386, 388, 401.</ref>

Muhammad decreed that the women could only mourn their relatives (other than a husband) for three days. After the three days were over, Zaynab received a condolence visit from the daughter of her cousin Abu Salama.<ref>Abu Salama and Zaynab were the offspring of two sisters. His daughter, also named Zaynab, would have been about nine years old and was perhaps reporting on the health of her father, who had been wounded at Uhud.</ref> In front of her guest, Zaynab made a show of asking for perfume and anointing herself, then explaining that she did not really want the perfume but that she was officially out of mourning.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}. The ''hadith'' does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmad, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned and whom, by the time of his death, she had not seen for twelve years. So it almost certainly refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.</ref> The prohibition on displays of grief must have been hard for the bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The specific loss for Zaynab, however, was that her brother Abdullah had been willing to support her against Muhammad’s wishes; now she had lost her protector just as she found herself married to a man whom she disliked.

It is sometimes claimed that the defeat at Uhud created a great social problem because there were so many widows to support. It is even claimed that the excess of widows was the reason why polygamy became necessary.<ref></ref> However, of the seventy Muslims who were killed, sixty-six were from Medina and only four were Meccan immigrants.<ref></ref> The community was accustomed to losing men to the tribal wars<ref></ref> and there was already a system in place to ensure the rights of widows, largely based on the assumption that most families owned some farmland.<ref></ref> Muhammad did have to adjudicate a few civil cases in which widows or orphans were being cheated by their relatives;<ref></ref> and perhaps a few of the poorest families had to join the beggars on the mosque Bench.<ref></ref> But there is no evidence at all that Medina was suddenly swamped by seventy desperate widows; it is even claimed that only thirty of the dead men had been married, suggesting that the city would also have had several surviving bachelors. The real problem for Muhammad was that his hosts in Medina had taken a great hit on his behalf and he was at risk of losing their sympathy. This would have bothered him far more than the issue of the widows.<ref></ref>

Hamnah had barely completed her ''idda'' before she was remarried to Talhah ibn Ubaydullah, a wealthy<ref></ref> thirty-year-old<ref></ref> bachelor who was kin to Abu Bakr.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170.</ref> Although he later became a polygamist, Hamnah was his only wife for several years.<ref></ref> Hamza’s widow also found a new husband,<ref></ref> but Abdullah’s widow never remarried; she had a bleeding disorder that raised doubts about her ritual cleanness.<ref></ref>

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>[http://www.al-islam.org/hayat-al-qulub-vol2-allamah-muhammad-baqir-al-majlisi/ Majlisi, ''Hayat al-Qulub'' 53] states that she was “in the bath.” This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources; and Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab’s movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

“In this year the Messenger married Zaynab bint Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd ibn Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|pp. 1-2}}.</ref>

When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Anas narrated. Zayd ibn Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), ‘Fear Allah and keep your wife.’” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart what Allah was about to reveal. He was to reveal thy love for her and that, should Zayd part with her, thou wouldst marry her, and thou fearedst that people would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’ But it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had finished with her, after the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there might be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.”<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Bukhari||60|310}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref> Thabit confirmed that this verse “was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd ibn Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref> Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

“When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.” When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37.|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So he desired her and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd who then understood (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Zayd left her, and she became free.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref> Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref>
“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muslims have not adopted children since that day. Muslim couples can still foster children as an act of charity, but these children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological relatives.

Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, “While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Aisha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.””<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. The traditional view is that Allah commanded Muhammad to marry Zaynab. There was no need to seek a reason. It was Allah’s will.

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

Traditional Muslims have no problem with this story. Since Muhammad was the “perfect man,” anything he did must have been by definition an “excellent example”. But it has made Westernised Muslims uncomfortable. They have tried to deny that it happened.

"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad continued to find wives for Zayd. In 628, at Muhammad’s order, he married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and probably much younger.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:162-163.</ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr’s sister (and Khadijah’s niece) Hind.<ref></ref> Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmad married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> "The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref> No unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.

When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.

Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.”

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref> “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.” She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. Zaynab’s house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks. The subsequent houses were also of palm-branches, but Zaynab’s was unique because it was the only one of the nine that was built with an attic (''mashruba'') that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}; {{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref> Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref> Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref> Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref> Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah<ref> Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref> – in that order – and that his least-favourite was Sawdah. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was fervent in prayer. “It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.” IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawdah’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawdah was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawdah was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again. Muhammad’s widows needed Umar’s permission to leave the city, and he never gave this.<ref></ref>

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref> Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref> Umar prayed at Zaynab’s funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmad carried her into her grave.<ref></ref> She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that “it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

''When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref>

{{Quote|[http://www.a2youth.com/ebooks/the_wives_of_the_prophet/zainab_bint_jahash/ Thompson, A. (DATE). “Zainab bint Jahash” in ''The Wives of the Prophet''. London: Ta-Ha Publishers.|The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-24T12:28:33Z

1234567:

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was the [[Muhammad| Prophet Muhammad’s]] seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to [[Mecca]] and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza’a tribe. [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that Asad’s family were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab’s children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists members of Riyab’s clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab’s son Jahsh married Umama (or Umayma) bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their six children were Muhammad’s first cousins.

# '''Abd''' was the eldest son. As an adult he was always known by his ''kunya'' '''Abu Ahmad'''.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>
# '''Abdullah''' was the second son.
# '''Zaynab''' was born c. 590. The birth-order of the daughters is not really known, but Zaynab appears to have been the only one who married before Islam.<ref>Both her sisters married prominent Muslims, suggesting that these marriages occurred after they had all converted to Islam. Zaynab would have been over twenty years old by then, and her husband appears to have remained a pagan, suggesting that they were already married before Islam. Of course, marriage-order is not proof of birth-order.</ref>
# '''Ubaydullah''' (“little Abdullah”) was the third son.
# '''Habibah''' was also known as '''Umm Habib'''. Both are feminine forms of the masculine ''Habib'' (“beloved”).
# '''Hamnah''' was probably the youngest child.<ref>Her first husband was born in 594 and her second husband in 595, suggesting that she was not older than this.</ref>

It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.<ref></ref>

Her eldest brother Abd was born blind. “He used to go all round Mecca from top to bottom without anyone to lead him. He was a poet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>

The Jahsh family lived under the patronage of Abu Sufyan and were on visiting terms with the best society in Mecca.

When they were teenagers, Ubaydullah came under the influence of the monotheist Zayd ibn Amr.<ref></ref> Zayd was nastily murdered sometime before 610.<ref></ref>

===First Marriage===

Zaynab’s eldest brother married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Al-Faraa, and Ubaydullah married his daughter Ramlah.<ref></ref> As far as we know, Abu Sufyan did not arrange a marriage for the middle brother Abdullah.

Zaynab was also married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72; {{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: “''Zaynab bint Jahsh ... said, 'O Messenger of God, I cannot give my consent, for I am a widow of the Quraysh.’''” Strictly speaking, these words do not even prove ''how many'' husbands Zaynab had already had. It is in theory possible that she was married more than once in Mecca although, to be parsimonious, we shall here assume that there was only one husband.</ref> He was a Quraysh, but probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab’s declaration that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was asserted in order to emphasise his high social status; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca. It is safe to say, however, that Zaynab’s bridegroom was approved, or even chosen, by Abu Sufyan, and that he was a person deemed as a person suitable to marry into the family favoured by the Umayyads.<ref></ref>

Her husband’s anonymity is decidedly strange. All the previous husbands of Muhammad’s other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. The lists include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow “embarrassing,” so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab’s first husband is missing from the list. It is more likely because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, the information had been lost. If nobody remembered the man’s name, this suggests that Zaynab did not talk about him very much. Perhaps she had loved him so much or hated him so much that she could not bear to speak about him; or perhaps the marriage had been so short-lived, or he had spent so much of it travelling away from home, that he had made very little impression on her. But Zaynab is not the only silent person here. Other people must have known her first husband: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayyad kin, their friends who emigrated with them. Yet none of them speaks a word, either good or bad.

We can take two educated guesses about Zaynab’s married life. Firstly, she became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from textiles and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of the Jahsh family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca’s many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> she must have enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Secondly, it appears that she had a child. She was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). “Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: “her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means “Mother of the Judge”. There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was not a by-name but a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. It is unlikely that Zaynab had any further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref> Although the reason for her secondary infertility cannot be known, a modern doctor would suspect the Rhesus negative condition. There is further evidence for a hereditary condition of this type in that her sister Habiba was also childless.

===Islam===

Zaynab was about twenty years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Another cousin, Abu Salama ibn Abdulasad, was among the earliest converts to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in Ibn Ishaq’s list of “those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr’s invitation,” but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615.<ref></ref> This suggests that Zaynab was converted<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref> under the influence of her brothers.

Zaynab’s single siblings soon married into the small Muslim community: Abdullah to the Hilal widow Zaynab bint Khuzayma, “Mother of the Poor”;<ref></ref> Habibah to the newly divorced Abdulrahman ibn Awf, <ref></ref> a wealthy merchant<ref></ref> who was related to Muhammad’s mother;<ref></ref> and Hamnah to Masood ibn Umayr,<ref></ref> a blue-eyed<ref></ref> rich boy<ref></ref> from the Abduldar clan.<ref></ref> Abu Sufyan’s daughters, the wives of Abu Ahmad and Ubaydullah, also became Muslims;<ref></ref> but the lists of early converts do not include anyone who could have plausibly been Zaynab’s husband. While the lists specifically mention those men whose widows later married Muhammad,<ref></ref> there is no such notice about Zaynab, so her husband probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama did not become a Muslim either.<ref>The biographies of Abdulmuttalib’s six daughters in Bewley/Saad 8:29 state that Safiya, Arwa and Atiqa became Muslims but say nothing about Umm Hakim, Barrah or Umama. {{Tabari|39|p. 198}} explains that Umm Hakim died before Islam; however, Umama was still alive in 628 (REF).</ref>

Hamnah’s two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. Masood died at Uhud in March 625.<ref></ref> She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.<ref></ref>

After 613 the Quraysh began a campaign of persecuting vulnerable Muslims.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s family was under the protection of Abu Sufyan and therefore the worst that could be done to them was that their businesses were boycotted, though apparently not very systematically.<ref></ref> In 615 Abdullah, Ubaydullah and their two brothers-in-law joined the emigration to Abyssinia.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s father Jahsh also left Mecca, although apparently not as part of the general exile to Abyssinia. As it happened, Jahsh never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Ubaydullah took his wife to Abyssinia with him,<ref>It is not certain that Abdullah was still married; he divorced Zaynab bint Khuzayma at some unknown date (REF).</ref> but Zaynab’s two sisters were left behind. This was apparently because the journey to Abyssinia was deemed a terrible sacrifice and hardship,<ref></ref> and women were not subjected to it if they would be safe in Mecca.<ref>The emigrants included eighty-three men but only eighteen women, all of them married. Many of these men would have been single, but several who are known to have been married did not take their wives to Abyssinia.</ref> It is not entirely clear who was protecting Zaynab and her sisters; but no harm befell them, so perhaps the Quraysh assumed that men were the real problem and did not target women. After most of the persecuted slaves recanted their faith,<ref></ref> the Quraysh declared a trade boycott on Muhammad’s clan;<ref></ref> they showed no interest in the handful of women who had married absent or respectable pagan men.

Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia until his death in 627.<ref></ref> but Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619.<ref></ref> He must have married Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh soon after his return.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173.</ref> His choice reflects a certain carelessness towards the Umayyads: Fatima was a member of the Asad clan (her father had been Khadijah’s first cousin)<ref></ref> so Abdullah was reverting to the original alliance that his grandfather had rejected forty years earlier. To emphasise the point, the couple named their son Muhammad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq shows that the baby was born by the time they left Mecca in 621.</ref>

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 213.</ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. Abu Ahmad’s wife begged to go “anywhere but Medina,” but he told her that Islam was more important than family ties and composed poetry about their argument.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215-217.</ref> By this time Zaynab was a widow,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215 lists the people whom Abdullah took with him, but none of them could plausibly have been Zaynab’s spouse. However, the list is not necessarily complete; in particular, it probably does not name all the women.</ref> although there is no information about when or how her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref>

Although it was a large party of at least twenty-eight people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> He locked up the house, leaving citizens who passed it to sigh over “its doors blowing to and fro, empty of inhabitants” and pontificate that, “''Every house however long its prosperity lasts will one day be overtaken by misfortune and trouble.'' The house of the Jahsh clan has become tenantless.” Abu Jahl said, “Nobody will weep over that. This is the work of this man’s nephew [Muhammad]. He has divided our community, disrupted our affairs, and driven a wedge between us.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215.</ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house and sold it to pay off his own debts.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> Abdullah was angry about this, saying that his family had chosen to ally with Abu Sufyan when they had received plenty of good offers from other Quraysh families.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> He asked Muhammad for justice; but Muhammad, busy in Medina and powerless to act in Mecca, told him to be content that Allah would give him a better house in Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref>. Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but there is some evidence that he had in fact been acting within his rights. Eight years later, when Muhammad conquered Mecca and could have easily commandeered any building that he wanted, Abu Ahmed again asked him to retrieve their house, but Muhammad ignored him. Other people told him, “You lost your house in Allah’s service, so don’t ask the Apostle about it again.” This lack of sympathy for the Jahsh family’s case suggests that Abu Sufyan had only lent, leased or given them the property on the understanding that they were his allies. By abandoning the house in order to ally so openly with Muhammad, who had declared war on Mecca,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 208.</ref> Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection. It seemed that nobody, including even the Muslims, disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally. All Abu Ahmad could do about it was to write another poem, along the lines of: “''I swear Abu Sufyan will regret this; may his theft stick to him like the ring of a dove…''”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref>

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with one of her brothers. Hamnah bore a daughter<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170.</ref> but Habibah remained childless.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:171.</ref> Muhammad did not arrive until September 622, more than a year later.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 227, 281.</ref> He built the mosque;<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 230.</ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref>These debates are described in detail in Guillaume/Ishaq 239-270.</ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, the raid under Abdullah’s leadership being the first in which a Muslim killed a Meccan and succeeded in stealing the merchandise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 286-289.</ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and Zaynab assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother thought at first that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage … they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself.”</ref>

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. While he was in fact planning to marry, his choice had fallen on Hafsah bint Umar,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.</ref> who was less beautiful than Zaynab<ref>Unlike Zaynab, Hafsa is never described as “beautiful,” and nor is it ever claimed that she was the reverse.</ref> but better educated<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “"Hafsah, the wife of the Prophet (SA), could write … `A'ishah (the wife of the Prophet) could read but not write, and Umm Salamah stood in a similar condition."” By implication, no other wife of Muhammad could even read.</ref> and some fifteen years younger.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 174}}.</ref> Shortly afterwards, he also married Zaynab bint Khuzaymah,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:82.</ref> and he then ruled that four wives were the maximum allowed.<ref>{{Quran|4|3}}. See also [http://www.qtafsir.com/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=718&Itemid=59/ Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir'' on Q4:3].</ref> Muhammad could not have rejected Zaynab more thoroughly. His proposal was that she should marry his adopted son Zayd.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out.”</ref>

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. His father and uncle came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad then took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.<ref></ref>

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until about 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

So Zayd already had two wives, not counting his divorced wife and his future heavenly bride, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. It is not mentioned whether anyone had asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife. The person who did not co-operate was Zaynab.

The reason Zaynab gave for refusing the proposal was “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}; Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> This probably meant that she considered herself too highborn to marry a former slave. Perhaps this reflects the insecurity of Zaynab’s ''nouveau riche'' origins – she was an Umayyad and yet not an Umayyad. But even if she was not fully Umayyad, her mother and first husband had still been fully Quraysh, while Zayd was not even Meccan.<ref>The Quraysh were the “nobility” of Mecca, but other tribes lived there too. The wealthy Hilal might be considered the equivalent of the “bourgeoisie”, while the Khuza’a were merely respectable. Residents from other tribes tended to be poor; they protected themselves by becoming the vassals of the important people. Lowest in the social pyramid was the slave class.</ref> The Meccans could be snobbish about “foreigners”, even if they were third-generation immigrants like Zaynab.<ref></ref> If Zaynab married a newcomer like Zayd, as if she did not deserve anyone “better,” there would be a permanent spotlight on her own foreign origins.

Zaynab did not mention Zayd’s physical appearance, but it is possible that she had further objections in that direction. First, he was ugly,<ref></ref> and she might have felt a simple physical repulsion. Second, although he traced his ancestry to an Arab tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 6}}.</ref> this might well have been by adoption rather than biology, for his “flat nose” and “very dark skin”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> suggest that his genes were from Africa. The Arabs could be very racist about this. For example, Muhammad once said, “You should listen to and obey your ruler even if he was an Ethiopian slave whose head looks like a raisin.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|89|256}}.</ref> Although it was officially a lesson in being “not racist,” the remark assumes that black people and slaves are inferior, and it was made because Muhammad expected his Arab audience to make a similar assumption.

While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab that she would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that she had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, she should not have needed to justify her reason. Finally, it must be stressed that Zaynab was being asked to accept the position of third wife. Added to the other social humiliations of the proposed union, this made the offer close to insulting. There were still plenty of bachelors in the emigrant community,<ref></ref> and all her siblings were at that date in monogamous marriages.<ref></ref>

Abdullah supported his sister’s refusal.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|249}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|829}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|6883}}.</ref>

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref> But for some reason he was determined that this marriage should take place. He announced a revelation from Allah: “''It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error.''”<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}. Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36: “This was revealed regarding Abdullah ibn Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this …”</ref> In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned. The traditional view is that Abdullah and Zaynab eventually “consented because of the verse,”<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> a situation that might be deemed spiritual blackmail.

====Reasons for the Marriage====

The Syrian scholar Ibn Kathir proposed that Muhammad arranged the marriage of Zayd and Zaynab to show that class distinctions were abolished in Islam. “The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered.”<ref>[http://www.angelfire.com/on/ummiby1/wives3.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''.]</ref>

There is little evidence, however, that Muhammad really thought that way. He certainly did not explain at the time why Zayd and Zaynab would have “made a good couple”. The only reason he gave Zaynab was, “I want you to marry him.”<ref></ref> If Muhammad really had wanted to promote marriage across the social divide, it would have made more sense to support a naturally occurring example, i.e., to praise two people from different backgrounds who wanted to marry each other despite the disapproval of the wealthier family or favoured race. But he did not; rather, he taught that a woman needed her guardian’s consent for a marriage to be valid.<ref></ref> Since families in seventh-century Arabia (as in most other cultures throughout history) usually arranged marriages to maximise economic advantage to both families, the practical result was that most people married someone of a similar social background. Muhammad openly admitted that money and social connections were two of the main reasons why anyone would marry<ref>The other two reasons were physical attraction and good character. He did concede that character was the best motive of the four, although there is no evidence that he selected any of his own wives primarily for that reason.</ref> and did not in any way criticise this attitude. By pressuring Zaynab into marrying a man whom she did not want, Muhammad was setting up an unhappy marriage. If he was demonstrating anything at all about social differences, it was therefore the opposite point – that marriage across the social divide is ''not'' a good idea.

There were no obvious political or economic reasons why Zayd and Zaynab needed to marry. Zayd was presumably living off his second wife’s date-orchard, while Zaynab supported herself through her leather-crafts. They were already on the same side of every political situation – both strong supporters of Muhammad – and a closer alliance between them would not in any way promote a stronger loyalty to Muhammad. While we do not really know why Muhammad was so insistent about this marriage, we can only guess that he did it to please Zayd. Again, while we do not know why Zayd wanted to marry Zaynab, she was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> Muhammad paid the dower.<ref></ref>

All was quiet for a couple of years.

The fortunes of the Jahsh family were changed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625. The Meccans attacked Medina in revenge for the Muslim aggression at Badr twelve months earlier. Muhammad suffered the worst defeat of his career when he was routed and his army was decimated.<ref></ref> Seventy Muslims were killed but 66 of them were new converts from Medina,<ref></ref> so Muhammad was at risk of losing the sympathies of his hosts. Zaynab’s sister Hamna was serving as a battle-auxiliary and was told that, of the four Meccan casualties, one was her uncle Hamza, whose corpse had been nastily mutilated. She calmly replied, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her brother Abdullah had also been killed<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> and mutlated. Hamna repeated, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her husband Musab had been slain. At this point she burst into tears and could not say any more than, “What will become of his children?”<ref></ref>

A few days later, Zaynab received a visit from Hind’s daughter Zaynab, who would have been about nine years old.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref><ref>The hadith does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned had whom, by the time of his death, she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.</ref> It is not surprising that Zaynab was on visiting terms with Hind and her daughter, for Zaynab’s aunt had been Hind’s stepmother;<ref></ref> they would have been acquainted all their lives, even before they both counted among the earliest converts to Islam. The prohibition on displays of grief<ref></ref> must have been hard for bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The death of Abdullah was significant for Zaynab because she lost her chief protector.

Hamnah had barely completed her ''idda'' before she was remarried to a kinsman of Abu Bakr, Talhah ibn Ubaydullah, a thirty-year-old bachelor. Although he later became a polygamist, Hamnah was his only wife for several years. Hamza’s widow also found a new husband, but Abdullah’s widow never remarried; she had a bleeding disorder that raised doubts about her ritual cleanness. Although the exact sequence of events is unclear, it was at about this time that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd. The death of Abdullah<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> might have been the real reason that Zaynab eventually became persuadable.

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>[http://www.al-islam.org/hayat-al-qulub-vol2-allamah-muhammad-baqir-al-majlisi/ Majlisi, ''Hayat al-Qulub'' 53] states that she was “in the bath.” This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources; and Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab’s movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

“In this year the Messenger married Zaynab bint Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd ibn Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|pp. 1-2}}.</ref>

When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Anas narrated. Zayd ibn Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), ‘Fear Allah and keep your wife.’” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart what Allah was about to reveal. He was to reveal thy love for her and that, should Zayd part with her, thou wouldst marry her, and thou fearedst that people would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’ But it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had finished with her, after the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there might be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.”<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Bukhari||60|310}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref> Thabit confirmed that this verse “was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd ibn Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref> Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

“When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.” When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37.|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So he desired her and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd who then understood (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Zayd left her, and she became free.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref> Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref>
“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muslims have not adopted children since that day. Muslim couples can still foster children as an act of charity, but these children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological relatives.

Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, “While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Aisha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.””<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. The traditional view is that Allah commanded Muhammad to marry Zaynab. There was no need to seek a reason. It was Allah’s will.

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

Traditional Muslims have no problem with this story. Since Muhammad was the “perfect man,” anything he did must have been by definition an “excellent example”. But it has made Westernised Muslims uncomfortable. They have tried to deny that it happened.

"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad continued to find wives for Zayd. In 628, at Muhammad’s order, he married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and probably much younger.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:162-163.</ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr’s sister (and Khadijah’s niece) Hind.<ref></ref> Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmad married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> "The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref> No unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.

When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.

Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.”

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref> “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.” She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. Zaynab’s house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks. The subsequent houses were also of palm-branches, but Zaynab’s was unique because it was the only one of the nine that was built with an attic (''mashruba'') that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}; {{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref> Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref> Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref> Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref> Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah<ref> Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref> – in that order – and that his least-favourite was Sawdah. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was fervent in prayer. “It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.” IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawdah’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawdah was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawdah was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again. Muhammad’s widows needed Umar’s permission to leave the city, and he never gave this.<ref></ref>

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref> Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref> Umar prayed at Zaynab’s funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmad carried her into her grave.<ref></ref> She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that “it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

===See Also===

''When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref>

{{Quote|[http://www.a2youth.com/ebooks/the_wives_of_the_prophet/zainab_bint_jahash/ Thompson, A. (DATE). “Zainab bint Jahash” in ''The Wives of the Prophet''. London: Ta-Ha Publishers.|The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-24T10:01:52Z

1234567:

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was the [[Muhammad| Prophet Muhammad’s]] seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to [[Mecca]] and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza’a tribe. [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that Asad’s family were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab’s children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists members of Riyab’s clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab’s son Jahsh married Umama (or Umayma) bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their six children were Muhammad’s first cousins.

# '''Abd''', the first of the sons, was born blind. “He used to go all round Mecca from top to bottom without anyone to lead him. He was a poet.” As an adult he was always known by his ''kunya'' '''Abu Ahmad'''.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>
# '''Abdullah''' was the second son.
# The birth-order of the daughters is not really known, but '''Zaynab''', who was born c. 590, may have been the eldest.<ref>While marriage-order is not proof of birth-order, Zaynab appears to have been the first sister to marry. Both her sisters married prominent Muslims, suggesting that these marriages occurred after they had all converted to Islam. Zaynab would have been over twenty years old by then, and her husband appears to have remained a pagan, suggesting that they were already married before Islam.</ref>
# '''Ubaydullah''' (“little Abdullah”) was the third son.
# '''Habibah''' was also known as '''Umm Habib'''. Both are feminine forms of the masculine ''Habib'' (“beloved”).
# '''Hamnah''' was probably the youngest child.<ref>Her first husband was born in 594 and her second husband in 595, suggesting that she was not older than this.</ref>

It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.<ref></ref>

Ubaydullah came under the influence of Zayd ibn Amr and became a monotheist.<ref></ref> He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Ramlah. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older. He died in Abyssinia in late 627.
Abu Ahmad married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Al-Faraa, and they had two sons.
# '''Habibah''' (also known as '''Umm Habib''') married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf al-Zuhri.
Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan.<ref></ref> He died at Uhud in March 625.<ref></ref> She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.<ref></ref>

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72; {{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: “''Zaynab bint Jahsh ... said, 'O Messenger of God, I cannot give my consent, for I am a widow of the Quraysh.’” Strictly speaking, these words do not even prove ''how many'' husbands Zaynab had already had. It is in theory possible that she was married more than once in Mecca although, to be parsimonious, we shall here assume that there was only one husband.</ref> He was a Quraysh, but probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab’s declaration that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was asserted in order to emphasise his high social status; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca. It is safe to say that her husband was approved by Abu Sufyan, who had arranged for two of her brothers to marry his own daughters.<ref></ref>

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. Firstly, she had a child. She was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). “Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: “her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means “Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was not a by-name but a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. It is unlikely that Zaynab had any further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of the Jahsh family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, we must address the decided strangeness of her husband's anonymity. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. The lists include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing from the list. It is more likely because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, the information had been lost. If nobody remembered his name, this suggests that Zaynab did not talk about him very much. Perhaps she had loved him so much or hated him so much that she could not bear to speak his name; or perhaps the marriage had been so short-lived, or he had spent so much of it travelling away from home, that he had made very little impression on her. But Zaynab was not the only silent person here. Other people must have known her first husband: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin, their friends who emigrated with them. Yet all are silent on both the good and the bad.

===Islam===

Zaynab was about twenty years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Another cousin, Abu Salama ibn Abdulasad, was among the earliest converts to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in Ibn Ishaq’s list of “those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr’s invitation,” but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615.<ref></ref> This suggests that Zaynab was converted<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. Zaynab’s single siblings soon married into the small Muslim community: Abdullah to the Hilal widow Zaynab bint Khuzayma, “Mother of the Poor”; Habibah to the newly divorced Abdulrahman ibn Awf, a wealthy merchant who was related to Muhammad’s mother; and Hamnah to Masood ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan. Abu Sufyan’s daughters, the wives of Abu Ahmad and Ubaydullah, also became Muslims;<ref></ref> but the lists of early converts do not include anyone who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. While they specifically note those men whose widows later married Muhammad,<ref></ref> there is no such notice about Zaynab, so her husband probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama did not become a Muslim either.<ref>The biographies of Abdulmuttalib's six daughters in Bewley/Saad 8:29-state that Safiya, Arwa and Atiqa became Muslims but say nothing about Umm Hakim, Barrah or Umama. {{Tabari|39|p. 198}} explains that Umm Hakim died before Islam; however, Umama was still alive in 628.</ref>

After 613 the Quraysh began a campaign of persecuting vulnerable Muslims. Zaynab’s family was under the protection of Abu Sufyan and therefore the worst that could be done to them was that their businesses were boycotted, though apparently not very systematically.<ref></ref> In 615 Abdullah, Ubaydullah and their two brothers-in-law joined the emigration to Abyssinia. Zaynab’s father Jahsh also left Mecca, although apparently not as part of the general exile to Abyssinia. As it happened, Jahsh never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Ubaydullah took his wife to Abyssinia with him,<ref>It is not certain that Abdullah was still married; he divorced Zaynab bint Khuzayma at some unknown date.</ref> but Zaynab’s two sisters were left behind. This was apparently because the journey to Abyssinia was deemed a terrible sacrifice and hardship, and women were not subjected to it if they would be safe in Mecca. It is not entirely clear who was protecting Zaynab and her sisters; but no harm befell them, so perhaps the Quraysh assumed that men were the real problem and did not target women. After most of the persecuted slaves recanted their faith, the Quraysh declared a trade boycott on Muhammad’s clan; they showed no interest in the handful of women who had married respectable pagan men.

Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619,<ref></ref> but Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia until his death in 627.<ref></ref>

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. By this time Zaynab was a widow, although there is no information about how or when her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref>

Although it was a large party of over twenty people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref></ref> He locked up the house, leaving citizens who passed it to sigh over “its doors blowing to and fro, empty of inhabitants” and pontificate that, “''Every house however long its prosperity lasts will one day be overtaken by misfortune and trouble.'' The house of the Jahsh clan has become tenantless.” Abu Jahl said, “Nobody will weep over that. This is the work of this man’s nephew [Muhammad]. He has divided our community, disrupted our affairs, and driven a wedge between us.”"<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215.</ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house and sold it for his own profit.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> Abdullah was angry about this,<ref></ref> saying that his family had chosen to ally with Abu Sufyan when they had received plenty of good offers from other Quraysh families.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> Muhammad, however, told him to be content with the treasures of Paradise.<ref></ref>. Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but it is quite likely that he had some sort of legal right over the property and had lent, leased or given it to the Jahshites on the understanding that they were his allies. By abandoning the house in order to ally so openly with Muhammad, who had declared war on Mecca,<ref></ref> Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection. It is unlikely that many of the Meccans disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally.

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with Abdullah, his wife Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh and their young son Muhammad.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173</ref>

Muhammad arrived in September 622.<ref></ref> He built the mosque;<ref></ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref></ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, an enterprise in which Abdullah was quite active.<ref></ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and Zaynab assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother thought at first that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage … they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself.”</ref>

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. He did not want to marry Zaynab. He was proposing that she marry his adopted son Zayd.<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38: “… Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out.”</ref> Further, it was about this time that he married both Hafsa bint Umar<ref></ref> and Zaynab bint Khuzayma.<ref></ref> It was also at this time that he ruled that four was the maximum number of wives.<ref></ref> Zaynab could not have been more thoroughly rejected.

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. His father and uncle came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad then took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.<ref></ref>

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until about 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

So Zayd already had two wives, not counting his divorced wife and his future heavenly bride, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. It is not mentioned whether anyone had asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife. The person who did not co-operate was Zaynab.

The reason Zaynab gave for refusing the proposal was “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}; Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> This probably meant that she considered herself too highborn to marry a former slave. Perhaps this reflects the insecurity of Zaynab’s ''nouveau riche'' origins – she was an Umayyad and yet not an Umayyad. But even if she was not fully Umayyad, her mother and first husband had still been fully Quraysh, while Zayd was not even Meccan.<ref>The Quraysh were the “nobility” of Mecca, but other tribes lived there too. The wealthy Hilal might be considered the equivalent of the “bourgeoisie”, while the Khuza’a were merely respectable. Residents from other tribes tended to be poor; they protected themselves by becoming the vassals of the important people. Lowest in the social pyramid was the slave class.</ref> The Meccans could be snobbish about “foreigners”, even if they were third-generation immigrants like Zaynab.<ref></ref> If Zaynab married a newcomer like Zayd, as if she did not deserve anyone “better,” there would be a permanent spotlight on her own foreign origins.

Zaynab did not mention Zayd’s physical appearance, but it is possible that she had further objections in that direction. First, he was ugly,<ref></ref> and she might have felt a simple physical repulsion. Second, although he traced his ancestry to an Arab tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 6}}.</ref> this might well have been by adoption rather than biology, for his “flat nose” and “very dark skin”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> suggest that his genes were from Africa. The Arabs could be very racist about this. For example, Muhammad once said, “You should listen to and obey your ruler even if he was an Ethiopian slave whose head looks like a raisin.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|89|256}}.</ref> Although it was officially a lesson in being “not racist,” the remark assumes that black people and slaves are inferior, and it was made because Muhammad expected his Arab audience to make a similar assumption.

While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab that she would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that she had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, she should not have needed to justify her reason. Finally, it must be stressed that Zaynab was being asked to accept the position of third wife. Added to the other social humiliations of the proposed union, this made the offer close to insulting. There were still plenty of bachelors in the emigrant community,<ref></ref> and all her siblings were at that date in monogamous marriages.<ref></ref>

Abdullah supported his sister’s refusal.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|249}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|829}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|6883}}.</ref>

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref> But for some reason he was determined that this marriage should take place. He announced a revelation from Allah: “''It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error.''”<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}. Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36: “This was revealed regarding Abdullah ibn Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this …”</ref> In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned. The traditional view is that Abdullah and Zaynab eventually “consented because of the verse,”<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> a situation that might be deemed spiritual blackmail.

====Reasons for the Marriage====

The Syrian scholar Ibn Kathir proposed that Muhammad arranged the marriage of Zayd and Zaynab to show that class distinctions were abolished in Islam. “The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered.”<ref>[http://www.angelfire.com/on/ummiby1/wives3.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''.]</ref>

There is little evidence, however, that Muhammad really thought that way. He certainly did not explain at the time why Zayd and Zaynab would have “made a good couple”. The only reason he gave Zaynab was, “I want you to marry him.”<ref></ref> If Muhammad really had wanted to promote marriage across the social divide, it would have made more sense to support a naturally occurring example, i.e., to praise two people from different backgrounds who wanted to marry each other despite the disapproval of the wealthier family or favoured race. But he did not; rather, he taught that a woman needed her guardian’s consent for a marriage to be valid.<ref></ref> Since families in seventh-century Arabia (as in most other cultures throughout history) usually arranged marriages to maximise economic advantage to both families, the practical result was that most people married someone of a similar social background. Muhammad openly admitted that money and social connections were two of the main reasons why anyone would marry<ref>The other two reasons were physical attraction and good character. He did concede that character was the best motive of the four, although there is no evidence that he selected any of his own wives primarily for that reason.</ref> and did not in any way criticise this attitude. By pressuring Zaynab into marrying a man whom she did not want, Muhammad was setting up an unhappy marriage. If he was demonstrating anything at all about social differences, it was therefore the opposite point – that marriage across the social divide is ''not'' a good idea.

There were no obvious political or economic reasons why Zayd and Zaynab needed to marry. Zayd was presumably living off his second wife’s date-orchard, while Zaynab supported herself through her leather-crafts. They were already on the same side of every political situation – both strong supporters of Muhammad – and a closer alliance between them would not in any way promote a stronger loyalty to Muhammad. While we do not really know why Muhammad was so insistent about this marriage, we can only guess that he did it to please Zayd. Again, while we do not know why Zayd wanted to marry Zaynab, she was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> Muhammad paid the dower.<ref></ref>

All was quiet for a couple of years.

The fortunes of the Jahsh family were changed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625. The Meccans attacked Medina in revenge for the Muslim aggression at Badr twelve months earlier. Muhammad suffered the worst defeat of his career when he was routed and his army was decimated.<ref></ref> Seventy Muslims were killed but 66 of them were new converts from Medina,<ref></ref> so Muhammad was at risk of losing the sympathies of his hosts. Zaynab’s sister Hamna was serving as a battle-auxiliary and was told that, of the four Meccan casualties, one was her uncle Hamza, whose corpse had been nastily mutilated. She calmly replied, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her brother Abdullah had also been killed<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> and mutlated. Hamna repeated, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her husband Musab had been slain. At this point she burst into tears and could not say any more than, “What will become of his children?”<ref></ref>

A few days later, Zaynab received a visit from Hind’s daughter Zaynab, who would have been about nine years old.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref><ref>The hadith does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned had whom, by the time of his death, she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.</ref> It is not surprising that Zaynab was on visiting terms with Hind and her daughter, for Zaynab’s aunt had been Hind’s stepmother;<ref></ref> they would have been acquainted all their lives, even before they both counted among the earliest converts to Islam. The prohibition on displays of grief<ref></ref> must have been hard for bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The death of Abdullah was significant for Zaynab because she lost her chief protector.

Hamnah had barely completed her ''idda'' before she was remarried to a kinsman of Abu Bakr, Talhah ibn Ubaydullah, a thirty-year-old bachelor. Although he later became a polygamist, Hamnah was his only wife for several years. Hamza’s widow also found a new husband, but Abdullah’s widow never remarried; she had a bleeding disorder that raised doubts about her ritual cleanness. Although the exact sequence of events is unclear, it was at about this time that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd. The death of Abdullah<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> might have been the real reason that Zaynab eventually became persuadable.

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>[http://www.al-islam.org/hayat-al-qulub-vol2-allamah-muhammad-baqir-al-majlisi/ Majlisi, ''Hayat al-Qulub'' 53] states that she was “in the bath.” This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources; and Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab’s movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

“In this year the Messenger married Zaynab bint Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd ibn Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|pp. 1-2}}.</ref>

When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Anas narrated. Zayd ibn Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), ‘Fear Allah and keep your wife.’” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart what Allah was about to reveal. He was to reveal thy love for her and that, should Zayd part with her, thou wouldst marry her, and thou fearedst that people would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’ But it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had finished with her, after the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there might be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.”<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Bukhari||60|310}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref> Thabit confirmed that this verse “was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd ibn Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref> Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

“When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.” When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37.|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So he desired her and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd who then understood (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Zayd left her, and she became free.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref> Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref>
“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muslims have not adopted children since that day. Muslim couples can still foster children as an act of charity, but these children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological relatives.

Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, “While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Aisha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.””<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. The traditional view is that Allah commanded Muhammad to marry Zaynab. There was no need to seek a reason. It was Allah’s will.

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

Traditional Muslims have no problem with this story. Since Muhammad was the “perfect man,” anything he did must have been by definition an “excellent example”. But it has made Westernised Muslims uncomfortable. They have tried to deny that it happened.

"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad continued to find wives for Zayd. In 628, at Muhammad’s order, he married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and probably much younger.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:162-163.</ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr’s sister (and Khadijah’s niece) Hind.<ref></ref> Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmad married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> "The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref> No unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.

When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.

Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.”

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref> “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.” She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. Zaynab’s house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks. The subsequent houses were also of palm-branches, but Zaynab’s was unique because it was the only one of the nine that was built with an attic (''mashruba'') that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}; {{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref> Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref> Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref> Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref> Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah<ref> Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref> – in that order – and that his least-favourite was Sawdah. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was fervent in prayer. “It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.” IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawdah’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawdah was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawdah was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again. Muhammad’s widows needed Umar’s permission to leave the city, and he never gave this.<ref></ref>

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref> Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref> Umar prayed at Zaynab’s funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmad carried her into her grave.<ref></ref> She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that “it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

''When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref>

{{Quote|[http://www.a2youth.com/ebooks/the_wives_of_the_prophet/zainab_bint_jahash/ Thompson, A. (DATE). “Zainab bint Jahash” in ''The Wives of the Prophet''. London: Ta-Ha Publishers.|The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

User talk:1234567

2013-06-23T11:50:09Z

1234567: /* Article comments */

User:1234567/Sandbox 1

2013-06-23T09:32:31Z

1234567: /* Reasons for the Marriage */

==Aisha bint Abi Bakr, Part 1==

[[File:DanishAisha.jpg|right|thumb|Aisha’s wedding day. Commissioned for Bluitgen, K. (2006). ''Koranen og profeten Muhammeds Liv'' (''The Quran and the Life of the Prophet Muhammad''). Copenhagen: Hoest & Soen. The artist chose to remain anonymous.|300px]]

Aisha bint Abi Bakr claimed that she was the [[Muhammad|Prophet Muhammad’s]] second wife,<ref>{{Muslim|8|3452}}.</ref> although this was not strictly correct.<ref>Aisha must have known that Muhammad married Sawdah bint Zamaa in the ninth month and herself in the tenth month of the same year ({{Tabari|39|pp. 170-171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:43, 55; {{Muslim|8|3312}}). However, the sequence of events in {{Tabari|9|pp. 128-130}} makes it clear that Muhammad did propose to Aisha before he proposed to Sawdah: “Khawlah replied, ‘The Messenger of God has sent me to ask for A’ishah’s hand in marriage on his behalf.’ … Then Khawlah left and went to Sawdah saying, ‘O Sawdah ... the Messenger of God has sent me with a marriage proposal.’” By claiming to be the second wife, i.e., the first after Khadijah, Aisha probably wanted to emphasise that she had been Muhammad’s first choice and was therefore more important than her co-wives.</ref> She is known as Aisha ''al-Siddiqa'' (“the Truthful”)<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref> to complement her father, who was also known as ''al-Siddiq''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46. “Masruq … would say, “The truthful daughter of the true, whose innocence was proclaimed, told me such-and-such.”</ref> This byname originally referred, not to Abu Bakr’s personal honesty, but to his “testimony to the truth” of Muhammad’s miraculous [[The Holy Qur'an: Al-Isra (The Night Journey)|Night Journey]].<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 183.</ref> Muslims consider Aisha another major “witness to the truth” of Muhammad’s prophetic office. The Syrian scholar Ismail ibn Umar ibn Kathir wrote:
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|A great deal of the knowledge that we still have today, about how our beloved Prophet lived and behaved, was first remembered and then taught to others by Aisha … This is what makes it so much easier for those who wish to follow in their footsteps to try and follow their example.}}
Aisha’s witness has bequeathed to the world a wealth of truth about the nature of Islam.

===Aisha’s Background===

Aisha was born in [[Mecca]] “at the beginning of the fourth year of prophethood,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> i.e., between 25 October 613 and 19 February 614.

Her father was the cloth-merchant Abu Bakr ibn Abi Quhafah from the Taym clan of the Quraysh. “He was a man whose society was desired, well liked and of easy manners … of high character and kindliness. His people used to come to him to discuss many matters with him because of his wide knowledge, his experience in commerce, and his sociable nature.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> His generosity had made him popular in the city.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}.</ref> Abu Bakr’s first wife was Qutaylah bint Abduluzza from the Amir ibn Luayy clan of the Quraysh. She bore him a daughter, Asma.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> He then married his business partner’s widow, Umm Ruman (Zaynab) bint Amir. She was an immigrant from the Kinana tribe whose only relative in Mecca was her young son, Tufayl ibn Al-Harith;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Muhammad once said that she looked like a ''houri''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> She was the mother of Abu Bakr’s first son, Abdulrahman.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 171-172}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Qutaylah then bore him a second son, Abdullah;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> but soon afterwards, Abu Bakr divorced Qutaylah.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:178: “Abu Bakr had divorced her in the ''Jahiliyah'',” i.e., before Islam, and therefore not, as is sometimes asserted, because of religious differences.</ref>

The family lived near [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] house<ref>Muir (1861). ''The Life of Mohamet'', p. 100. London: Smith, Elder & Co.</ref> and must have known Muhammad for several years before the latter declared himself a prophet in 610. Abu Bakr “did not hold back or hesitate.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> He was the first male outside Muhammad’s family to convert to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115. According to {{Tabari|39|p. 201}}, one woman, Lubabah bint Al-Harith, claimed that her conversion pre-dated Abu Bakr’s.</ref> “When he became a Muslim, he showed his faith openly and called others to God and his apostle… He began to call to God and to Islam all whom he trusted of those who came to him and sat with him… He brought them to the apostle when they had accepted his invitation and they accepted Islam and prayed.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115, 116.</ref> The earliest Muslim historian, [[Ibn Ishaq|Muhammad ibn Ishaq]], lists fifty people who became Muslims through Abu Bakr’s preaching,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115-117.</ref> which was probably the majority of the earliest converts.

Aisha was born in the year when Islam was first publicly preached in Mecca<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 117.</ref> and she never knew any lifestyle other than Islam.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> She grew up in a household where her mother was the only wife and she had four much-older siblings. The records also mention several servants.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116, 144, 224; </ref> Aisha was still a baby when a pagan neighbour, Al-Mutim ibn Adiy, proposed that she marry his son Jubayr. Abu Bakr informally accepted this proposal but he did not enter a binding marriage contract.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}.</ref> Aisha’s paternal grandparents, already in their seventies at the time of her birth, lived nearby.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Her grandmother, Umm Al-Khayr bint Sakhr, was a Muslim,<ref>Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' vol. 8.</ref> but her grandfather, Abu Quhafah ibn Amir, remained a pagan. When he spoke disparagingly of Muhammad, Abu Bakr hit his father’s chest so hard that the old man became unconscious.<ref>Qurtubi, ''Tafsir'' vol. 17 p. 307. Cited in [http://books.google.com.au/books?id=AeAG74TdAXEC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=false/ Radtke, B., & O’Kane, J. (1996). ''The Concept of Sainthood in Early Islamic Mysticism'', p. 142. Richmond, Surrey: Curzon Press] and also in [http://www.tasawwuf.org/writings/love_prophet/love_abubakr.pdf/ “The Love of Hadrat Abu Bakr”, p. 6, in ''Tasawwuf'']. It is said that Allah sent down {{Quran|58|22}} in response.</ref>

Aisha was less than three years old when the Quraysh declared a blockade against the Hashimite clan.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 159-160.</ref> Abu Bakr considered leaving Mecca to join the exiles in Abyssinia. But he found a protector who agreed to keep the neighbours from harassing him on condition he confined his religion to the privacy of his home and did not try to convert anyone else. Abu Bakr kept to the letter of the agreement and stopped preaching outside his home. But he later built a mosque in the courtyard of his house, where he once again read the Qur’an out loud, and women and youths flocked to hear his preaching. The men challenged his duplicity, and Abu Bakr renounced his protection.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; Guillaume/Ishaq 171.</ref> Nevertheless, the worst recorded attack on Abu Bakr is that “one of the loutish fellows of Quraysh” once threw dust on his head,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 171-172.</ref> an understandable expression of annoyance under the circumstances. Aisha recalled that the ''ayat'' {{Quran|54|46}}, concerning the occasion when the moon was miraculously split in the sky, was first recited in Mecca when she was “a little girl at play,” three or four years old. She did not, however, claim to remember the miracle itself.<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|387}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|388}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|399}}; {{Bukhari|6|61|515}}. The Lebanese scholar Dr [http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Gibril Haddad] says: “The ''hadith'' masters, ''sira'' historians and Qur’anic commentators agree that the splitting of the moon took place about five years before the Holy Prophet’s ''Hijra'' to Madina,” i.e., in 617-618.</ref>

When Aisha was six, the blockade against the Hashimites was revoked, and the clan emerged from hiding in the mountain ravine. After that, Muhammad came to visit her father every morning and evening.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> Aisha never met his wife Khadijah,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|166}}.</ref> who returned to Mecca in poor health and died shortly afterwards.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 191; {{Tabari|39|pp. 4, 161}}; Bewley/Saad 8:12, 152.</ref>

===Reasons for the Marriage===

When Khadijah died in April 620, “the Prophet was terribly grieved over her,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54.</ref> and “people feared for him.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> After only a few days, Khawlah bint Hakim, the sister-in-law of his friend [[Umar al Khattab (quotes)|Umar]],<ref>She was married to Uthman ibn Mazoon (Guillaume/Ishaq 590), whose sister Zaynab was married to Umar (Bewley/Saad 8:56).</ref> decided that he needed a new wife. She called on Muhammad to tell him that she knew of both a maid and a matron whom he might [[Marriage|marry]] and asked which one he would prefer. He immediately responded that he would take them both.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}.</ref>

The maid was Abu Bakr’s daughter. It is often claimed that Muhammad married her “to reinforce the friendly relations already existing with Abu Bakr.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?''].</ref> In one sense this is true: Abu Bakr was one of the few men in Mecca who would still have been willing to give him a daughter.<ref>For Muhammad’s unpopularity with his pagan neighbours, see Guillaume/Ishaq 191-194.</ref> But this assertion mistakes cause and effect. The marriage did not “promote” any alliance with Abu Bakr; rather, it was the existing close bond with Abu Bakr that made the marriage possible. Muhammad’s request to his friend might not even have reflected Khawlah’s original intention, for the oral traditions about Muhammad’s life were first put in writing long after his death,<ref>Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: Its Origin, Development, Special Features and Criticism'', pp. 8-9. “''Hadith'' which thus spread throughout the vast Muslim dominions had been preserved for a century partly in writing (in the form of laws and letters dictated by Muhammad himself, and in the form of various ''Sahifahs'' ascribed to many of his Companions), and partly in the memory of those who had associated with him and watched carefully his words and deeds. After the death of Muhammad, Umar I intended to collect the ''Ahadith''. He gave the matter his careful consideration for one whole month, invoking the help of God in his decision, and seeking the advice of his friends. But he had to give up the great project for fear of the Qur’an being neglected by the Muslims.” Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> and it could be that they have been distorted by narrators who did not know about the interview with Khawlah until they also had hind-knowledge of its result. It is not impossible that Khawlah originally mentioned “Abu Bakr’s daughter” without giving the name, and that she had actually been referring to his elder daughter Asma. Regardless of whether or not Khawlah was complicit in the eventual outcome, what happened was that Muhammad completely overlooked the sixteen-year-old Asma<ref>[http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Haddad] cites Al-Dhahabi in ''Siyar Alam al-Nubala'' vol. 2 p. 289: “Asma was ten years older than Aisha.” Haddad points out that Al-Dhahabi elsewhere suggests Asma might have been even older than this, possibly as old as twenty-five.</ref> and asked instead to marry the six-year-old Aisha.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref>

It is also suggested that Muhammad “married Aisha for the benefit of Islam and Humanity … From her, 2210 Hadith have come... Many of her transmissions pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behaviour which only someone in Aisha's position could have learnt.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?'']</ref> There is no evidence to support this theory. If Muhammad had wanted the traditions about his life to be securely transmitted to posterity, he would not have relied on the hope that his young widow might later think of it; he would have arranged to have them committed to writing during his lifetime. He never did. Further, if he had believed that a wife was the best kind of chronicler, he would have chosen an adult spouse who knew how to write. Aisha could in fact read<ref>{{Bukhari|6|61|515}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> but she never learned to write.<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “It is reported that Aisha used to read the Qur’an but she did not write.”</ref>

What Muhammad later said was that [[Allah]] had instructed him to marry Aisha. He said the angel [[Gabriel|Jibreel]] had appeared to him in a dream, holding a veiled child and saying, “Messenger of Allah, this one will remove some of your sorrow. This one has some of the qualities of Khadijah.” Then he lifted the veil, revealing that the child was Aisha.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54-55; {{Muslim|31|5977}}.</ref> In a second dream, Jibreel showed him Aisha’s portrait painted on silk, promising, “She will be your wife in Paradise.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|235}}; {{Bukhari|9|87|140}}.</ref> If Muhammad really had any such dream, it is disturbing that he would act on it so literally.

Muhammad’s decision to marry Aisha was made less than three weeks after Khadijah’s death<ref>Khadijah died on 10 Ramadan, and Muhammad married Sawdah before Ramadan had ended. Even if he married her on the ''same day'' as Khawlah’s visit (the day he also decided to marry Aisha), this was a maximum of twenty days after Khadijah’s death. Common sense suggests that it would have more likely taken a day or two to organise the wedding, which did not necessarily take place as late as the final day of the month.</ref> while he was grieving. He was not necessarily making wise decisions, even from his own point of view. Muhammad’s choice of Aisha over Asma must have been influenced by personal qualities that Aisha had and Asma did not. While Asma’s appearance is never described, Aisha was very pretty. This was conceded by people who had no vested interest<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|435}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|145}}.</ref> as well as by those who might have been biased.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 495; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> She was slim and light-framed<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}}</ref> with a fair, rosy complexion and perhaps also red hair,<ref>In Al-Nasa’i 5:307 and Bewley/Saad 8:55, Muhammad addresses Aisha as ''Humayra'', which means “little red one”. This was not a commonplace nickname, so Aisha’s degree of redness must have been unusual.</ref> which she wore plaited.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|241}}.</ref> Her nephew later said, “I did not see a greater scholar than Aisha in poetry, Arab history and genealogy,”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 67; Al-Hakim, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 4 p. 11. See also Al-Dhahabi, “Aisha, Mother of the Faithful” in ''Tadhkirat al-Huffaz'' p. 1/13.</ref> and it was said that there was no one else “more intelligent in opinion if her opinion was sought.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 2, p. 481.</ref> While we might question whether Muhammad was aware of her intelligence when she was only six years old, she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah,” who is described as “determined and intelligent”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref>

===Marriage Contract===

When Muhammad made his formal request for Aisha’s hand, he did not mention that Allah had “commanded” him to marry her.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> Abu Bakr hesitated at first, saying, “Would this be suitable, since she is like my brother’s daughter?” But Muhammad said that their brotherhood was purely spiritual and did not preclude such a marriage.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref> Abu Bakr had to break off Aisha’s informal engagement to Jubayr ibn Al-Mutim, but this proved easy, as the pagan family no longer wished to risk that their son might convert to Islam.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> So Abu Bakr married his daughter to Muhammad in May or June 620. Unlike Abu Bakr’s previous agreement with Al-Mutim, his contract with Muhammad was not a “betrothal” or “engagement” (as some English translators have suggested) but in every way a legally binding marriage, which could only be dissolved by death or divorce.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|1|7|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|2|3309}}; {{Muslim|2|3310}}; {{Muslim|2|3311}}; {{Muslim|4|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref>

Soon afterwards, Aisha was sent to Muhammad with a basket of dates. As soon as they were alone in the room, Muhammad “stretched out his blessed hand and grabbed her clothes.” Aisha “glared” at him and exclaimed, “People call you The Trustworthy, but to me you are The Treacherous!” She shook him off, rearranged her clothes and went to complain to her father. Abu Bakr showed no anger or even surprise; he only told her that she was now married to Muhammad, who was therefore treating her like a wife.<ref>Abdulrahman Hamdanius, ''Al-Shabayat'', cited in Maracci, L. (1698). ''Vita Mahometis'', p. 23. Padua, Italy: Seminary Printing Press.</ref> While there is no record that Muhammad made any more advances to Aisha as long as she lived in her father’s house (he had probably not expected that a child as young as six would resist him), it is sufficient evidence of his sexual intentions towards her that such an attack should have occurred even once.

Although Aisha heard her father’s words, it seems she did not really understand them, for she later claimed that she had not known that she was married until the very day of the consummation.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43. “I did not know that the Messenger of Allah had married me until my mother took me and made me sit in the room rather than being outside [on the day of the consummation]. Then it occurred to me that I was married.”</ref> That Aisha did not know that she was married was, of course, nothing unusual. Throughout history and in nearly every culture, betrothals have been arranged over cradles, and women in particular have been married without their knowledge, understanding or consent. The fact that Aisha was a child is barely an issue here; no woman of any age should be married without her own consent, whether she is six, sixteen, thirty-six or sixty. However, it is unlikely that any seventh-century Arab grasped “informed consent” in the way the modern West understands it. Muhammad’s similar failure to grasp it betrays that he was no prophet or pioneer of human rights but was simply a normal product of his own culture.

Muhammad instructed Umm Ruman, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position”. One day Aisha complained to her father about her mother. This made Abu Bakr angry with both of them. Umm Ruman “came after” Aisha, who hid behind the front door, “weeping with great distress.” When Muhammad arrived for his daily visit, Aisha told him everything. Muhammad’s eyes “overflowed with tears” as he reminded Umm Ruman, “Didn’t I tell you to watch over Aisha for me?” Umm Ruman tried to give her side of the story, but Muhammad replied, “So what?” Aisha’s mother had to promise, “I will never trouble her again.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> As the specific details have been omitted from this story, it is not apparent whether it was Umm Ruman who was a difficult mother or Aisha who was a difficult child, or even whether it was Abu Bakr who was a difficult husband and father; but it is certain that Muhammad was interfering with another family’s affairs without any interest in knowing all the facts.

In 622 Abu Bakr accompanied Muhammad on his flight (''Hijra'') to [[Medina]]. He took all his savings with him, leaving nothing to support his family, much to the consternation of his elderly father. Asma had to fool her grandfather, who was blind, by touching his hand to a cloth covering a pile of stones and letting him believe they were a sack of coins.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Fortunately it was only a few months before Abu Bakr sent for his family to join him in Medina. Aisha had an adventure on the way: “My camel broke loose. I was sitting in the ''howdah'' with my mother, and she started exclaiming, ‘Alas, my daughter! Alas, you bride!’ But they caught up with our camel after it had safely descended the Lift Valley.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172}); Bewley/Saad 8:44-45.</ref> After the dry heat of Mecca, the emigrants found Medina damp and cool, and several of them were struck by fever. Aisha was bemused by the delirious ramblings of two of Abu Bakr’s servants and asked Muhammad what it meant. Some of the Muslims were so weak that they said their prayers sitting down until Muhammad advised them, “The prayer of the sitter is only half as valuable as the prayer of the stander.” Thereupon they “painfully struggled to their feet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 413-414.</ref> Then Aisha herself became feverish for a whole month, and her hair fell out.<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876.</ref>

===Paedophilia===

After Aisha had recovered, “and my hair had grown back past my earlobes,”<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876</ref> Abu Bakr approached Muhammad and asked him if he would like to consummate the marriage. He did not explain why he suddenly lost his scruples over child-marriage; but Aisha’s illness would have hinted at her mortality, while the flight to Medina must have altered the political landscape unrecognisably, so perhaps Abu Bakr felt the need to confirm his continuing importance in the Muslim hierarchy. The family landscape had also changed, for Abu Bakr had lately acquired a new wife, Habibah bint Kharijah, a Medinan woman whom he visited in the suburbs at a discreet distance from the mosque.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:243. “Habiba bint Kharija ibn Zayd … married Abu Bakr ''as-Siddiq'' and bore him Umm Kulthum.” See also Guillaume/Ishaq 227, 234. P. 681 shows that Habibah never resided near the mosque even after Umm Ruman died. See also {{Tabari|11|pp. 151-152}}.</ref> Perhaps he expected this marriage to produce new financial burdens, although in fact Habibah’s only child, Umm Kulthum, was not to be born until 634.<ref>{{Tabari|11|p. 141 & f769}}; Bewley/Saad 8:243; {{Muwatta|36|33|40}}.</ref> It is worth noting that Habibah’s grandfather was still alive and apparently fit and active.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/AsbabAlnuzol.asp?SoraName=4&Ayah=34&search=yes&img=A/ Al-Wahidi, ''Asbab Al-Nuzul''. Translated by Guezzou, M. (2011). ''Context of Revelation'', Q4:34. Amman, Jordan: Royal Aal al-Bayt Institute for Islamic Thought.]</ref> This suggests that Habibah was a very young woman, which might also have caused Abu Bakr to revise his ideas about the suitable age for a girl to marry.

Muhammad did not express any outrage or disgust at this invitation; instead of correcting his friend’s morality, he merely confessed that he had no cash to pay the dower. Abu Bakr replied that he would provide this.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172-173}}.</ref> The earliest source states that it was a sum of 400 ''dirhams''<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918</ref> (about £2,000), but others say 12½ ounces,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 173, 189}}; {{Muslim|38|3318}; {{Abudawud|11|2101}}; Bewley/Saad 8:118. The ounces were presumably of silver, since the same weight of gold would have had ten times this value. Perhaps the later chroniclers updated for inflation.</ref> which would have been worth 500 ''dirhams'' (£2,500). It is also said that that dower was “some household goods worth 50 ''dirhams''”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44</ref> (£250), so perhaps part of the value was paid in kind.

[[File:Mosque630.jpg|left|thumb|Plan of the mosque at Medina, c. 630. Aisha’s house is at the top left, marked with A.|300px]]

Umm Ruman also cooperated with the new plan. She tried to fatten Aisha up before sending her to Muhammad’s house. Several types of food failed to replace the flesh that she had lost during her illness “till she gave me cucumber with fresh dates to eat. Then I became fat as good.”<ref>{{Abudawud|28|3894}}.</ref> In April or May 623 Aisha, now aged nine, was playing on a swing with some friends when her mother called her over. Still breathless, Aisha was taken to the little house that had just been built into the wall of the mosque, a hut of unbaked bricks with a palm-branch roof, perhaps five metres by four in size.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 172-173; Bewley/Saad 8:121; [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 65.3/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 1:65:3].</ref> When she was brought inside, where some ''ansar'' women wished her good luck, “it occurred to me that I was married. I did not ask her, and my mother was the one who told me.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43.</ref> For some reason, Umm Ruman then departed, leaving the ''ansar'' women to wash and perfume Aisha, dress her up in a red-striped gown and comb her hair. When her father’s friend Muhammad arrived, she was surprised, suggesting that she had still not guessed the identity of her bridegroom, but not afraid. The women left the house, and Muhammad sat her on his lap.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|7|62|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|8|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3310}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Abudawud|41|4915}}; {{Abudawud|41|4917}}; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref> The consummation was not marked by any kind of wedding party or public celebration: “neither a camel nor a sheep was slaughtered for me.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 131}}.</ref> This possibly indicates that, while the Muslim converts did not question Muhammad’s judgment, he knew only too well what his [[Islam and the People of the Book|Jewish]] neighbours would think of his bigamy.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:143. “They envied him because of the number of his wives and they criticised him for that, saying, ‘If he had been a prophet, he would not have desired women.’ The most intense of them in that criticism was Huyayy ibn Akhtab,” the chief of the Nadir tribe. It is probably not a coincidence that, just five years later, Muhammad’s collection of wives included Huyayy’s favourite daughter. It is not stated, however, that Huyayy had a specific objection to Aisha’s extreme youth.</ref>

Aisha said, “I was preferred over the wives of the Prophet,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46</ref> and asked rhetorically, “Which of his wives is more fortunate than I?”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> She was always very proud of her position as the beloved of the Prophet and never recognised that she had been [[Rape in Islam|raped]]. She spoke calmly of the way Muhammad sucked her tongue<ref>{{Abudawud|13|2380}}.</ref> and took baths with her in the same tub,<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|263}}; {{Bukhari|1|6|298}}.</ref> and of how she would then wash the semen off his clothes<ref>{{Bukhari|1|4|229}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|230}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|231}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|232}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|233}}.</ref> and anoint him with perfume<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|267}}.</ref> (his favourite was ''dhikarat al-tayyib'', a blend of musk and ambergris<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:11.</ref>).

Aisha’s acceptance of the situation does not alter the fact that a fifty-two-year-old man should have known better than to engage sexually with a nine-year-old. Most cultures throughout history have understood that a girl should not be touched before puberty. The Jews in Medina most certainly understood it.<ref>Ezekiel 16:7-8; [http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm/ “Prohibited Marriages and Illegitimate Children”] in ''Judaism 101''.</ref> Muslim apologists have tried to plead that Aisha was an early developer for whom “it is most likely her puberty started at 8, and continued till she was 9, and once she was going through puberty and her menses, this made her a lady and not a girl anymore.”<ref>[http://muslim-responses.com/Marriage_with_Aisha/Marriage_with_Aisha_/ Zaatari, S. “A Detailed analysis of the Prophet's Marriage to Aisha”] in ''Muslim Responses''.</ref> But this is not correct. Aisha had still not reached menarche by the age of fourteen and a half, more than five years after the consummation of her marriage. She several times described her fourteen-year-old self as a ''jariya'' (“prepubescent girl”)<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}} also refers to her light weight at the time of the raid on the Mustaliq tribe. {{Muslim|4|1940}} emphasises her “tender age” at the time of the Abyssinian sword-display, which must have happened after the Order of the Veil, since Muhammad had to screen her, i.e., at earliest in March 628.</ref> and in July 628 was still playing with dolls, which were forbidden to adults but permitted to prepubescents.<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}.</ref> Although this could not have been predicted on her wedding day, she actually belonged to the 10% of girls who are latest in reaching puberty.<ref>The [http://www.mum.org/menarage.htm/ mean age of menarche] was 12½ years. This is quite similar to today, when the [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2733039/ standard deviation] is about 18 months. So probably only 5% of Aisha’s contemporaries would have been menstruating before age ten, 16% by age eleven, 32% by age twelve, 68% by age thirteen, 84% by age fourteen, 95% by age fifteen and over 99% by age sixteen. These statistics suggest that Aisha did menstruate within twelve months of the doll-playing incident, but the exact date is not recorded.</ref> At nine, she would have been flat-chested and only three-quarters of her future height; nobody could have mistaken her for an adult. Unlike the informed consent issue, which simply reveals that Muhammad was a product of his culture, this act of paederasty betrays that Muhammad was morally inferior to his own culture. He rejected the moral norms of his wisest contemporaries and abused a little girl for no better reason than that Abu Bakr had made it easy for him to do so. He demonstrated for once and for all that he had no timeless, universal moral insight to offer the world – in short, that he was not a prophet.

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Aisha was to remain Muhammad’s favourite wife.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}.</ref> He claimed that Aisha was dearer to him “than butter with dates”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> and superior to all other women in the same way that a meat stew was superior to plain bread.<ref>{{Bukhari|4|55|623}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|113}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|114}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|329}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|330}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|339}}.</ref> When a companion asked him, “Whom do you love most in this world?” he replied, “Aisha!” When the young man protested that he had meant ''male'' persons, Muhammad corrected his reply to, “Her father.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|57|14}}.</ref> He made himself a doorway in the mosque wall close to Aisha’s house-door,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 173}}; Bewley/Saad 8:45.</ref> presumably to visit her more conveniently. At table he would eat meat from a bone that she had bitten and drink from her cup.<ref>[http://ahadith.co.uk/chapter.php?cid=153&page=8/ Nasa’i 1:70.]</ref> As he once sat repairing his sandals, Aisha stared at him until he asked why. She replied, “Al-Huthali’s poem was written for you! He said that if you looked to the majesty of the moon, it twinkles and lights up the world for everybody to see.” Muhammad walked over to her, kissed her between the eyes, and said, “I swear to Allah, Aisha, you are like that to me and more.”<ref>''Sunan'' al-Bayhaqi #15825.</ref> She asked, “How is your love for me?” and he replied that it was, “Like the rope’s knot.” After that she would often ask, “How is the knot?” and he would reply, “The same as ever!”<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref>

Muhammad allowed Aisha her playtime. Her collection of dolls included at least three shaped like female humans<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and a stuffed horse with wings. Muhammad questioned her about this anomaly but he laughed when she reminded him that Solomon was supposed to have owned winged horses.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4914}}.</ref> Strangely, neither of them mentioned that Muhammad himself claimed to have ridden a winged horse a few years earlier.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 182; {{Bukhari|4|54|429}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|227}}.</ref> Aisha said that (presumably after she grew older) she used to hide her dolls under a garment when Muhammad entered, “but she did not stop.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:47.</ref>

At first her playmates “felt shy of Allah’s Messenger”<ref>{{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and “used to hide themselves” when Muhammad entered her house, “but the Prophet would call them to join and play with me.”<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}</ref> At festival time her friends sang badly and beat tambourines in her house, although Muhammad came to lie down there. Abu Bakr rebuked them: “Musical instruments of Satan near the Prophet!” But Muhammad told the girls not to stop their play for him.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}; {{Bukhari|2|15|72}}.</ref> Later that day, some Abyssinian guests put on a display in the mosque courtyard to demonstrate their prowess with shields and spears. Women were not really allowed, but Muhammad circumvented the regulation by standing in front of Aisha at her front door, screening her with his cloak, so that she could watch the performance without being seen.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}.</ref> She once beat him in a running race. Later, after she had put on weight, they raced again, and he won, remarking, “This pays you back for that other time!”<ref>{{Abudawud|14|2572}}.</ref> Given the chance to mount an unbroken camel, she drove it “round and round” until Muhammad had to remind her to be gentle with the animal.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6275}}; {{Muslim|32|6274}}. See also {{Abudawud|41|4790}}.</ref>

But what these “innocent” episodes demonstrate, above anything else, is that Aisha ''was'' a child. A grown woman does not play with dolls and swings. Aisha was just a little girl who, like any other little girl, was inconsiderate about noise<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|72}}</ref> and could not cook.<ref>Al-Nasa’i 8917 tells an incident where a co-wife declines to eat Aisha’s cooking and Muhammad also avoids tasting it; since politeness compelled people, even if “not hungry,” to accept at least a small portion, the food is presumably not fit to eat. {{Bukhari|3|48|829}} reveals that Aisha usually delegated the daily baking to her maid and did not even watch the rising dough reliably. In Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 227 (see also {{Bukhari|1|7|152}}), the teenaged Aisha is so jealous of a co-wife’s superior culinary skills that she smashes her dish.</ref> While (as shown above) she could be surprisingly assertive towards her elders, she was no match for Muhammad on an ongoing basis. In such a situation of power imbalance, she often resorted to hinting indirectly when she was angry with him, by declaiming, “By the lord of Ibrahim,” instead of her usual, “By the lord of Muhammad.” However, he took the hint.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|155}}.</ref>

===Poverty===

Muhammad taught that women “have the right to their food and clothing in accordance with the custom.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 112-113}}. See also {{Abudawud|11|2137}}.</ref> But he did not provide much food for Aisha, and she was always hungry. She was underweight because she so rarely ate meat.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 494; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> She claimed she never ate barley bread for more than three successive days. Sometimes the family did not light a fire for a month on end because they had nothing to cook but lived off dates and water.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7085}}; {{Muslim|42|7083}}; {{Muslim|42|7086}}; {{Muslim|42|7084}}; {{Muslim|42|7087}}; {{Muslim|42|7089}}; {{Muslim|42|7092}}; {{Muslim|42|7093}}; {{Muslim|42|7097}}; {{Muslim|42|7098}}.</ref> A neighbour once sent Aisha a pudding. While she was finishing her prayers, a cat came in and ate some of it, but she had no compunction in eating from the place that the cat had licked.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|76}}. This incident probably dates from after Aisha was widowed; but she maintained the habits she had learned from Muhammad.</ref>

Muhammad told Aisha, “Beware of sitting with the wealthy, and do not replace a garment until you have already mended it.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:53.</ref> Throughout her life, she disliked discarding worn-out clothes.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:52.</ref> She did own a gown costing about five ''dirhams'' (£25), and “no woman desiring to appear elegant before her husband failed to borrow [it] from me.” But the cloth cannot have been of very high quality compared to what became available in Medina in later decades, for although the widowed Aisha continued to wear similar clothes, her [[Slavery|slave]] refused to wear such a coarse gown in the house.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|796}}.</ref> The mosque had no indoor toilets, “for we loathe and detest them,”<ref>Guilaume/Ishaq 495.</ref> and Aisha did not have a lamp in her house.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|9|492}}.</ref> When her quilt was stolen, she began to curse the unknown thief. However, Muhammad told her not to do so, because curses on earth would only lessen the thief’s punishment in the Hereafter.<ref>{{Abudawud|8|1492}}; {{Abudawud|41|4891}}.</ref>

Charity was a way of life for the Arabs, and of course the Prophet’s young wife had to set the example. In the early years, beggars sat on the Bench in the mosque courtyard waiting for food distribution.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|10|576}}: “The ''Suffa'' companions were poor people, and the Prophet said, ‘Whoever has food for two persons should take a third one from them.’” See also [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life3/chap8.htm/ Muir (1861), pp. 20-21.]</ref> Aisha used to count them until Muhammad told her, “Give and do not calculate, [or else] calculation will be made against you.”<ref>{{Abudawud|9|1696}}.</ref> Sometimes he brought them into her house to be fed, although she struggled to find food “as small in quantity as a pigeon” to serve them.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|5022}}.</ref> On one occasion a beggar came to her door on a fast-day, and Aisha told her maid to give him their only loaf. The servant protested that there would be nothing to break their fast, but Aisha insisted.<ref>{{Muwatta|58|1|5}}.</ref> On another occasion, a widow with two daughters came begging, and Aisha’s larder was reduced to one date. She handed it over, and the widow divided it between the children without taking anything for herself.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6362}}; {{Bukhari|8|73|24}}.</ref> Ibn Kathir, writing seven hundred years after the event, cited this old tradition.
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|The Prophet had sacrificed an animal, and Ayesha was so generous in sharing the meat out amongst the poor that she found that she had left nothing for the Messenger’s large household except the shoulder of the animal. Feeling a little distressed, she went to the Prophet, and said, ‘I’ve only been able to save this.’ ‘That is the only part that you have not saved,’ smiled the Prophet, ‘for whatever you give away in the name of Allah, you save, and whatever you keep for yourself, you lose.’”}}
The shoulder was Muhammad’s favourite part of the sheep.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 516</ref>

The fact that Aisha had a servant does not indicate very much about the comfort-level of her home. Barira was a slave whom Aisha bought for nine ounces of silver (about £1,800) with the specific goal of immediate manumission. As it happened, Barira had nowhere else to go, so she chose to stay with Aisha as a domestic maid.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:181; {{Bukhari|3|47|752}}.</ref> Muhammad put up the silver, which only proves that (largely through the successes of his wars and robberies<ref>For the booty from his battles, see Guillaume/Ishaq 324, 326-327, 438, 466; {{Tabari|7|p. 87}}.</ref>) he by now had some money in his coffer. But he spent his money on arming his warriors,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> bribing the double-minded<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 594-597</ref> or assisting the poor<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521.</ref> (which included such acts as manumitting slaves). According to Aisha, it did not translate to food for his household. “The Prophet of Allah liked three worldly objects – perfume, women and food … He obtained women and perfumes but he did not get food.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:4</ref> The servant Barira was an extra mouth for Muhammad to feed, and she must have been as hungry as her young mistress.

After the conquest of Khaybar in July 628, Muhammad was no longer poor, and Aisha was granted a share of the revenues.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521-523.</ref> She hoped that “at last we will eat our fill of dates.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|547}}. See also {{Muslim|9|3506}} and {{Muslim|9|3510}}, dating from this period.</ref> But if her rations improved, she did not remember it afterwards, so the majority of her sacks of wheat and dates must have been sold for cash or distributed to the poor. On the day Muhammad died, he was “King” of all Arabia, but Aisha’s barrel contained only one handful of barley.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7091}}; Jalalayn’s commentary on Q93:8.</ref>

===See Also===

*[[Qur'an, Hadith and Scholars:Aisha]] (''primary and early sources about Aisha'')
*[[Aisha Age of Consummation|Aisha's Age of Consummation]]
*[[Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aishas Age|Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aisha's Age]]
*[[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha]]
*[[Aisha and Puberty]]
*[[A Refutation of 'The Islamophobe's Glass House']]
*[[Rejecting Dr David Lieperts Aisha Was Older Apologetic Myth|Rejecting Dr. David Liepert's "Aisha Was Older" Apologetic Myth]] ''(Essay)''
*[[Islam and Pedophilia]] ''(Core Article)''
*[[Forced Marriage]]
*[[Muhammad's Wives]] (''Hub Page'')
*[[Aisha (Farsideology)]] (''satire'')

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 1

2013-06-23T09:29:51Z

1234567: /* Reasons for the Marriage */

==Aisha bint Abi Bakr, Part 1==

[[File:DanishAisha.jpg|right|thumb|Aisha’s wedding day. Commissioned for Bluitgen, K. (2006). ''Koranen og profeten Muhammeds Liv'' (''The Quran and the Life of the Prophet Muhammad''). Copenhagen: Hoest & Soen. The artist chose to remain anonymous.|300px]]

Aisha bint Abi Bakr claimed that she was the [[Muhammad|Prophet Muhammad’s]] second wife,<ref>{{Muslim|8|3452}}.</ref> although this was not strictly correct.<ref>Aisha must have known that Muhammad married Sawdah bint Zamaa in the ninth month and herself in the tenth month of the same year ({{Tabari|39|pp. 170-171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:43, 55; {{Muslim|8|3312}}). However, the sequence of events in {{Tabari|9|pp. 128-130}} makes it clear that Muhammad did propose to Aisha before he proposed to Sawdah: “Khawlah replied, ‘The Messenger of God has sent me to ask for A’ishah’s hand in marriage on his behalf.’ … Then Khawlah left and went to Sawdah saying, ‘O Sawdah ... the Messenger of God has sent me with a marriage proposal.’” By claiming to be the second wife, i.e., the first after Khadijah, Aisha probably wanted to emphasise that she had been Muhammad’s first choice and was therefore more important than her co-wives.</ref> She is known as Aisha ''al-Siddiqa'' (“the Truthful”)<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref> to complement her father, who was also known as ''al-Siddiq''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46. “Masruq … would say, “The truthful daughter of the true, whose innocence was proclaimed, told me such-and-such.”</ref> This byname originally referred, not to Abu Bakr’s personal honesty, but to his “testimony to the truth” of Muhammad’s miraculous [[The Holy Qur'an: Al-Isra (The Night Journey)|Night Journey]].<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 183.</ref> Muslims consider Aisha another major “witness to the truth” of Muhammad’s prophetic office. The Syrian scholar Ismail ibn Umar ibn Kathir wrote:
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|A great deal of the knowledge that we still have today, about how our beloved Prophet lived and behaved, was first remembered and then taught to others by Aisha … This is what makes it so much easier for those who wish to follow in their footsteps to try and follow their example.}}
Aisha’s witness has bequeathed to the world a wealth of truth about the nature of Islam.

===Aisha’s Background===

Aisha was born in [[Mecca]] “at the beginning of the fourth year of prophethood,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> i.e., between 25 October 613 and 19 February 614.

Her father was the cloth-merchant Abu Bakr ibn Abi Quhafah from the Taym clan of the Quraysh. “He was a man whose society was desired, well liked and of easy manners … of high character and kindliness. His people used to come to him to discuss many matters with him because of his wide knowledge, his experience in commerce, and his sociable nature.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> His generosity had made him popular in the city.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}.</ref> Abu Bakr’s first wife was Qutaylah bint Abduluzza from the Amir ibn Luayy clan of the Quraysh. She bore him a daughter, Asma.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> He then married his business partner’s widow, Umm Ruman (Zaynab) bint Amir. She was an immigrant from the Kinana tribe whose only relative in Mecca was her young son, Tufayl ibn Al-Harith;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Muhammad once said that she looked like a ''houri''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> She was the mother of Abu Bakr’s first son, Abdulrahman.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 171-172}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Qutaylah then bore him a second son, Abdullah;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> but soon afterwards, Abu Bakr divorced Qutaylah.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:178: “Abu Bakr had divorced her in the ''Jahiliyah'',” i.e., before Islam, and therefore not, as is sometimes asserted, because of religious differences.</ref>

The family lived near [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] house<ref>Muir (1861). ''The Life of Mohamet'', p. 100. London: Smith, Elder & Co.</ref> and must have known Muhammad for several years before the latter declared himself a prophet in 610. Abu Bakr “did not hold back or hesitate.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> He was the first male outside Muhammad’s family to convert to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115. According to {{Tabari|39|p. 201}}, one woman, Lubabah bint Al-Harith, claimed that her conversion pre-dated Abu Bakr’s.</ref> “When he became a Muslim, he showed his faith openly and called others to God and his apostle… He began to call to God and to Islam all whom he trusted of those who came to him and sat with him… He brought them to the apostle when they had accepted his invitation and they accepted Islam and prayed.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115, 116.</ref> The earliest Muslim historian, [[Ibn Ishaq|Muhammad ibn Ishaq]], lists fifty people who became Muslims through Abu Bakr’s preaching,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115-117.</ref> which was probably the majority of the earliest converts.

Aisha was born in the year when Islam was first publicly preached in Mecca<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 117.</ref> and she never knew any lifestyle other than Islam.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> She grew up in a household where her mother was the only wife and she had four much-older siblings. The records also mention several servants.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116, 144, 224; </ref> Aisha was still a baby when a pagan neighbour, Al-Mutim ibn Adiy, proposed that she marry his son Jubayr. Abu Bakr informally accepted this proposal but he did not enter a binding marriage contract.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}.</ref> Aisha’s paternal grandparents, already in their seventies at the time of her birth, lived nearby.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Her grandmother, Umm Al-Khayr bint Sakhr, was a Muslim,<ref>Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' vol. 8.</ref> but her grandfather, Abu Quhafah ibn Amir, remained a pagan. When he spoke disparagingly of Muhammad, Abu Bakr hit his father’s chest so hard that the old man became unconscious.<ref>Qurtubi, ''Tafsir'' vol. 17 p. 307. Cited in [http://books.google.com.au/books?id=AeAG74TdAXEC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=false/ Radtke, B., & O’Kane, J. (1996). ''The Concept of Sainthood in Early Islamic Mysticism'', p. 142. Richmond, Surrey: Curzon Press] and also in [http://www.tasawwuf.org/writings/love_prophet/love_abubakr.pdf/ “The Love of Hadrat Abu Bakr”, p. 6, in ''Tasawwuf'']. It is said that Allah sent down {{Quran|58|22}} in response.</ref>

Aisha was less than three years old when the Quraysh declared a blockade against the Hashimite clan.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 159-160.</ref> Abu Bakr considered leaving Mecca to join the exiles in Abyssinia. But he found a protector who agreed to keep the neighbours from harassing him on condition he confined his religion to the privacy of his home and did not try to convert anyone else. Abu Bakr kept to the letter of the agreement and stopped preaching outside his home. But he later built a mosque in the courtyard of his house, where he once again read the Qur’an out loud, and women and youths flocked to hear his preaching. The men challenged his duplicity, and Abu Bakr renounced his protection.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; Guillaume/Ishaq 171.</ref> Nevertheless, the worst recorded attack on Abu Bakr is that “one of the loutish fellows of Quraysh” once threw dust on his head,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 171-172.</ref> an understandable expression of annoyance under the circumstances. Aisha recalled that the ''ayat'' {{Quran|54|46}}, concerning the occasion when the moon was miraculously split in the sky, was first recited in Mecca when she was “a little girl at play,” three or four years old. She did not, however, claim to remember the miracle itself.<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|387}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|388}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|399}}; {{Bukhari|6|61|515}}. The Lebanese scholar Dr [http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Gibril Haddad] says: “The ''hadith'' masters, ''sira'' historians and Qur’anic commentators agree that the splitting of the moon took place about five years before the Holy Prophet’s ''Hijra'' to Madina,” i.e., in 617-618.</ref>

When Aisha was six, the blockade against the Hashimites was revoked, and the clan emerged from hiding in the mountain ravine. After that, Muhammad came to visit her father every morning and evening.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> Aisha never met his wife Khadijah,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|166}}.</ref> who returned to Mecca in poor health and died shortly afterwards.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 191; {{Tabari|39|pp. 4, 161}}; Bewley/Saad 8:12, 152.</ref>

===Reasons for the Marriage===

When Khadijah died in April 620, “the Prophet was terribly grieved over her,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54.</ref> and “people feared for him.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> After only a few days, Khawlah bint Hakim, the sister-in-law of his friend [[Umar al Khattab (quotes)|Umar]],<ref>She was married to Uthman ibn Mazoon (Guillaume/Ishaq 590), whose sister Zaynab was married to Umar (Bewley/Saad 8:56).</ref> decided that he needed a new wife. She called on Muhammad to tell him that she knew of both a maid and a matron whom he might [[Marriage|marry]] and asked which one he would prefer. He immediately responded that he would take them both.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}.</ref>

The maid was Abu Bakr’s daughter. It is often claimed that Muhammad married her “to reinforce the friendly relations already existing with Abu Bakr.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?''].</ref> In one sense this is true: Abu Bakr was one of the few men in Mecca who would still have been willing to give him a daughter.<ref>For Muhammad’s unpopularity with his pagan neighbours, see Guillaume/Ishaq 191-194.</ref> But this assertion mistakes cause and effect. The marriage did not “promote” any alliance with Abu Bakr; rather, it was the existing close bond with Abu Bakr that made the marriage possible. Muhammad’s request to his friend might not even have reflected Khawlah’s original intention, for the oral traditions about Muhammad’s life were first put in writing long after his death,<ref>Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: Its Origin, Development, Special Features and Criticism'', pp. 8-9. “''Hadith'' which thus spread throughout the vast Muslim dominions had been preserved for a century partly in writing (in the form of laws and letters dictated by Muhammad himself, and in the form of various ''Sahifahs'' ascribed to many of his Companions), and partly in the memory of those who had associated with him and watched carefully his words and deeds. After the death of Muhammad, Umar I intended to collect the ''Ahadith''. He gave the matter his careful consideration for one whole month, invoking the help of God in his decision, and seeking the advice of his friends. But he had to give up the great project for fear of the Qur’an being neglected by the Muslims.” Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> and it could be that they have been distorted by narrators who did not know about the interview with Khawlah until they also had hind-knowledge of its result. It is not impossible that Khawlah originally mentioned “Abu Bakr’s daughter” without giving the name, and that she had actually been referring to his elder daughter Asma. Regardless of whether or not Khawlah was complicit in the eventual outcome, what happened was that Muhammad completely overlooked the sixteen-year-old Asma<ref>[http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Haddad] cites Al-Dhahabi in ''Siyar Alam al-Nubala'' vol. 2 p. 289: “Asma was ten years older than Aisha.” Haddad points out that Al-Dhahabi elsewhere suggests Asma might have been even older than this, possibly as old as twenty-five.</ref> and asked instead to marry the six-year-old Aisha.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref>

It is also suggested that Muhammad “married Aisha for the benefit of Islam and Humanity … From her, 2210 Hadith have come... Many of her transmissions pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behaviour which only someone in Aisha's position could have learnt.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?'']</ref> There is no evidence to support this theory. If Muhammad had wanted the traditions about his life to be securely transmitted to posterity, he would not have relied on the hope that his young widow might later think of it; he would have arranged to have them committed to writing during his lifetime. He never did. Further, if he had believed that a wife was the best kind of chronicler, he would have chosen an adult spouse who knew how to write. Aisha could in fact read<ref>{{Bukhari|6|61|515}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> but she never learned to write.<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “It is reported that Aisha used to read the Qur’an but she did not write.”</ref>

What Muhammad later said was that [[Allah]] had instructed him to marry Aisha. He said the angel [[Gabriel|Jibreel]] had appeared to him in a dream, holding a veiled child and saying, “Messenger of Allah, this one will remove some of your sorrow. This one has some of the qualities of Khadijah.” Then he lifted the veil, revealing that the child was Aisha.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54-55; {{Muslim|31|5977}}.</ref> In a second dream, Jibreel showed him Aisha’s portrait painted on silk, promising, “She will be your wife in Paradise.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|235}}; {{Bukhari|9|87|140}}.</ref> If Muhammad really had any such dream, it is disturbing that he would act on it so literally.

Muhammad’s decision to marry Aisha was made less than three weeks after Khadijah’s death<ref>Khadijah died on 10 Ramadan, and Muhammad married Sawdah before Ramadan had ended. Even if he married her on the ''same day'' as Khawlah’s visit (the day he also decided to marry Aisha), this was a maximum of twenty days after Khadijah’s death. Common sense suggests that it would have more likely taken a day or two to organise the wedding, which did not necessarily take place as late as the final day of the month.</ref> while he was grieving. He was not necessarily making wise decisions, even from his own point of view. There is little doubt that Muhammad’s choice of Aisha over Asma was influenced by Aisha’s personal qualities. That she was very pretty was conceded by people who had no vested interest<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|435}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|145}}.</ref> as well as by those who might have been biased.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 495; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> She was slim and light-framed<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}}</ref> with a fair, rosy complexion and perhaps also red hair,<ref>In Al-Nasa’i 5:307 and Bewley/Saad 8:55, Muhammad addresses Aisha as ''Humayra'', which means “little red one”. This was not a commonplace nickname, so Aisha’s degree of redness must have been unusual.</ref> which she wore plaited.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|241}}.</ref> Her nephew later said, “I did not see a greater scholar than Aisha in poetry, Arab history and genealogy,”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 67; Al-Hakim, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 4 p. 11. See also Al-Dhahabi, “Aisha, Mother of the Faithful” in ''Tadhkirat al-Huffaz'' p. 1/13.</ref> and it was said that there was no one else “more intelligent in opinion if her opinion was sought.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 2, p. 481.</ref> While we might question whether Muhammad was aware of her intelligence when she was only six years old, she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah,” who is described as “determined and intelligent”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref>

===Marriage Contract===

When Muhammad made his formal request for Aisha’s hand, he did not mention that Allah had “commanded” him to marry her.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> Abu Bakr hesitated at first, saying, “Would this be suitable, since she is like my brother’s daughter?” But Muhammad said that their brotherhood was purely spiritual and did not preclude such a marriage.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref> Abu Bakr had to break off Aisha’s informal engagement to Jubayr ibn Al-Mutim, but this proved easy, as the pagan family no longer wished to risk that their son might convert to Islam.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> So Abu Bakr married his daughter to Muhammad in May or June 620. Unlike Abu Bakr’s previous agreement with Al-Mutim, his contract with Muhammad was not a “betrothal” or “engagement” (as some English translators have suggested) but in every way a legally binding marriage, which could only be dissolved by death or divorce.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|1|7|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|2|3309}}; {{Muslim|2|3310}}; {{Muslim|2|3311}}; {{Muslim|4|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref>

Soon afterwards, Aisha was sent to Muhammad with a basket of dates. As soon as they were alone in the room, Muhammad “stretched out his blessed hand and grabbed her clothes.” Aisha “glared” at him and exclaimed, “People call you The Trustworthy, but to me you are The Treacherous!” She shook him off, rearranged her clothes and went to complain to her father. Abu Bakr showed no anger or even surprise; he only told her that she was now married to Muhammad, who was therefore treating her like a wife.<ref>Abdulrahman Hamdanius, ''Al-Shabayat'', cited in Maracci, L. (1698). ''Vita Mahometis'', p. 23. Padua, Italy: Seminary Printing Press.</ref> While there is no record that Muhammad made any more advances to Aisha as long as she lived in her father’s house (he had probably not expected that a child as young as six would resist him), it is sufficient evidence of his sexual intentions towards her that such an attack should have occurred even once.

Although Aisha heard her father’s words, it seems she did not really understand them, for she later claimed that she had not known that she was married until the very day of the consummation.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43. “I did not know that the Messenger of Allah had married me until my mother took me and made me sit in the room rather than being outside [on the day of the consummation]. Then it occurred to me that I was married.”</ref> That Aisha did not know that she was married was, of course, nothing unusual. Throughout history and in nearly every culture, betrothals have been arranged over cradles, and women in particular have been married without their knowledge, understanding or consent. The fact that Aisha was a child is barely an issue here; no woman of any age should be married without her own consent, whether she is six, sixteen, thirty-six or sixty. However, it is unlikely that any seventh-century Arab grasped “informed consent” in the way the modern West understands it. Muhammad’s similar failure to grasp it betrays that he was no prophet or pioneer of human rights but was simply a normal product of his own culture.

Muhammad instructed Umm Ruman, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position”. One day Aisha complained to her father about her mother. This made Abu Bakr angry with both of them. Umm Ruman “came after” Aisha, who hid behind the front door, “weeping with great distress.” When Muhammad arrived for his daily visit, Aisha told him everything. Muhammad’s eyes “overflowed with tears” as he reminded Umm Ruman, “Didn’t I tell you to watch over Aisha for me?” Umm Ruman tried to give her side of the story, but Muhammad replied, “So what?” Aisha’s mother had to promise, “I will never trouble her again.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> As the specific details have been omitted from this story, it is not apparent whether it was Umm Ruman who was a difficult mother or Aisha who was a difficult child, or even whether it was Abu Bakr who was a difficult husband and father; but it is certain that Muhammad was interfering with another family’s affairs without any interest in knowing all the facts.

In 622 Abu Bakr accompanied Muhammad on his flight (''Hijra'') to [[Medina]]. He took all his savings with him, leaving nothing to support his family, much to the consternation of his elderly father. Asma had to fool her grandfather, who was blind, by touching his hand to a cloth covering a pile of stones and letting him believe they were a sack of coins.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Fortunately it was only a few months before Abu Bakr sent for his family to join him in Medina. Aisha had an adventure on the way: “My camel broke loose. I was sitting in the ''howdah'' with my mother, and she started exclaiming, ‘Alas, my daughter! Alas, you bride!’ But they caught up with our camel after it had safely descended the Lift Valley.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172}); Bewley/Saad 8:44-45.</ref> After the dry heat of Mecca, the emigrants found Medina damp and cool, and several of them were struck by fever. Aisha was bemused by the delirious ramblings of two of Abu Bakr’s servants and asked Muhammad what it meant. Some of the Muslims were so weak that they said their prayers sitting down until Muhammad advised them, “The prayer of the sitter is only half as valuable as the prayer of the stander.” Thereupon they “painfully struggled to their feet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 413-414.</ref> Then Aisha herself became feverish for a whole month, and her hair fell out.<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876.</ref>

===Paedophilia===

After Aisha had recovered, “and my hair had grown back past my earlobes,”<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876</ref> Abu Bakr approached Muhammad and asked him if he would like to consummate the marriage. He did not explain why he suddenly lost his scruples over child-marriage; but Aisha’s illness would have hinted at her mortality, while the flight to Medina must have altered the political landscape unrecognisably, so perhaps Abu Bakr felt the need to confirm his continuing importance in the Muslim hierarchy. The family landscape had also changed, for Abu Bakr had lately acquired a new wife, Habibah bint Kharijah, a Medinan woman whom he visited in the suburbs at a discreet distance from the mosque.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:243. “Habiba bint Kharija ibn Zayd … married Abu Bakr ''as-Siddiq'' and bore him Umm Kulthum.” See also Guillaume/Ishaq 227, 234. P. 681 shows that Habibah never resided near the mosque even after Umm Ruman died. See also {{Tabari|11|pp. 151-152}}.</ref> Perhaps he expected this marriage to produce new financial burdens, although in fact Habibah’s only child, Umm Kulthum, was not to be born until 634.<ref>{{Tabari|11|p. 141 & f769}}; Bewley/Saad 8:243; {{Muwatta|36|33|40}}.</ref> It is worth noting that Habibah’s grandfather was still alive and apparently fit and active.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/AsbabAlnuzol.asp?SoraName=4&Ayah=34&search=yes&img=A/ Al-Wahidi, ''Asbab Al-Nuzul''. Translated by Guezzou, M. (2011). ''Context of Revelation'', Q4:34. Amman, Jordan: Royal Aal al-Bayt Institute for Islamic Thought.]</ref> This suggests that Habibah was a very young woman, which might also have caused Abu Bakr to revise his ideas about the suitable age for a girl to marry.

Muhammad did not express any outrage or disgust at this invitation; instead of correcting his friend’s morality, he merely confessed that he had no cash to pay the dower. Abu Bakr replied that he would provide this.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172-173}}.</ref> The earliest source states that it was a sum of 400 ''dirhams''<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918</ref> (about £2,000), but others say 12½ ounces,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 173, 189}}; {{Muslim|38|3318}; {{Abudawud|11|2101}}; Bewley/Saad 8:118. The ounces were presumably of silver, since the same weight of gold would have had ten times this value. Perhaps the later chroniclers updated for inflation.</ref> which would have been worth 500 ''dirhams'' (£2,500). It is also said that that dower was “some household goods worth 50 ''dirhams''”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44</ref> (£250), so perhaps part of the value was paid in kind.

[[File:Mosque630.jpg|left|thumb|Plan of the mosque at Medina, c. 630. Aisha’s house is at the top left, marked with A.|300px]]

Umm Ruman also cooperated with the new plan. She tried to fatten Aisha up before sending her to Muhammad’s house. Several types of food failed to replace the flesh that she had lost during her illness “till she gave me cucumber with fresh dates to eat. Then I became fat as good.”<ref>{{Abudawud|28|3894}}.</ref> In April or May 623 Aisha, now aged nine, was playing on a swing with some friends when her mother called her over. Still breathless, Aisha was taken to the little house that had just been built into the wall of the mosque, a hut of unbaked bricks with a palm-branch roof, perhaps five metres by four in size.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 172-173; Bewley/Saad 8:121; [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 65.3/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 1:65:3].</ref> When she was brought inside, where some ''ansar'' women wished her good luck, “it occurred to me that I was married. I did not ask her, and my mother was the one who told me.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43.</ref> For some reason, Umm Ruman then departed, leaving the ''ansar'' women to wash and perfume Aisha, dress her up in a red-striped gown and comb her hair. When her father’s friend Muhammad arrived, she was surprised, suggesting that she had still not guessed the identity of her bridegroom, but not afraid. The women left the house, and Muhammad sat her on his lap.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|7|62|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|8|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3310}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Abudawud|41|4915}}; {{Abudawud|41|4917}}; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref> The consummation was not marked by any kind of wedding party or public celebration: “neither a camel nor a sheep was slaughtered for me.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 131}}.</ref> This possibly indicates that, while the Muslim converts did not question Muhammad’s judgment, he knew only too well what his [[Islam and the People of the Book|Jewish]] neighbours would think of his bigamy.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:143. “They envied him because of the number of his wives and they criticised him for that, saying, ‘If he had been a prophet, he would not have desired women.’ The most intense of them in that criticism was Huyayy ibn Akhtab,” the chief of the Nadir tribe. It is probably not a coincidence that, just five years later, Muhammad’s collection of wives included Huyayy’s favourite daughter. It is not stated, however, that Huyayy had a specific objection to Aisha’s extreme youth.</ref>

Aisha said, “I was preferred over the wives of the Prophet,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46</ref> and asked rhetorically, “Which of his wives is more fortunate than I?”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> She was always very proud of her position as the beloved of the Prophet and never recognised that she had been [[Rape in Islam|raped]]. She spoke calmly of the way Muhammad sucked her tongue<ref>{{Abudawud|13|2380}}.</ref> and took baths with her in the same tub,<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|263}}; {{Bukhari|1|6|298}}.</ref> and of how she would then wash the semen off his clothes<ref>{{Bukhari|1|4|229}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|230}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|231}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|232}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|233}}.</ref> and anoint him with perfume<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|267}}.</ref> (his favourite was ''dhikarat al-tayyib'', a blend of musk and ambergris<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:11.</ref>).

Aisha’s acceptance of the situation does not alter the fact that a fifty-two-year-old man should have known better than to engage sexually with a nine-year-old. Most cultures throughout history have understood that a girl should not be touched before puberty. The Jews in Medina most certainly understood it.<ref>Ezekiel 16:7-8; [http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm/ “Prohibited Marriages and Illegitimate Children”] in ''Judaism 101''.</ref> Muslim apologists have tried to plead that Aisha was an early developer for whom “it is most likely her puberty started at 8, and continued till she was 9, and once she was going through puberty and her menses, this made her a lady and not a girl anymore.”<ref>[http://muslim-responses.com/Marriage_with_Aisha/Marriage_with_Aisha_/ Zaatari, S. “A Detailed analysis of the Prophet's Marriage to Aisha”] in ''Muslim Responses''.</ref> But this is not correct. Aisha had still not reached menarche by the age of fourteen and a half, more than five years after the consummation of her marriage. She several times described her fourteen-year-old self as a ''jariya'' (“prepubescent girl”)<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}} also refers to her light weight at the time of the raid on the Mustaliq tribe. {{Muslim|4|1940}} emphasises her “tender age” at the time of the Abyssinian sword-display, which must have happened after the Order of the Veil, since Muhammad had to screen her, i.e., at earliest in March 628.</ref> and in July 628 was still playing with dolls, which were forbidden to adults but permitted to prepubescents.<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}.</ref> Although this could not have been predicted on her wedding day, she actually belonged to the 10% of girls who are latest in reaching puberty.<ref>The [http://www.mum.org/menarage.htm/ mean age of menarche] was 12½ years. This is quite similar to today, when the [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2733039/ standard deviation] is about 18 months. So probably only 5% of Aisha’s contemporaries would have been menstruating before age ten, 16% by age eleven, 32% by age twelve, 68% by age thirteen, 84% by age fourteen, 95% by age fifteen and over 99% by age sixteen. These statistics suggest that Aisha did menstruate within twelve months of the doll-playing incident, but the exact date is not recorded.</ref> At nine, she would have been flat-chested and only three-quarters of her future height; nobody could have mistaken her for an adult. Unlike the informed consent issue, which simply reveals that Muhammad was a product of his culture, this act of paederasty betrays that Muhammad was morally inferior to his own culture. He rejected the moral norms of his wisest contemporaries and abused a little girl for no better reason than that Abu Bakr had made it easy for him to do so. He demonstrated for once and for all that he had no timeless, universal moral insight to offer the world – in short, that he was not a prophet.

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Aisha was to remain Muhammad’s favourite wife.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}.</ref> He claimed that Aisha was dearer to him “than butter with dates”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> and superior to all other women in the same way that a meat stew was superior to plain bread.<ref>{{Bukhari|4|55|623}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|113}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|114}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|329}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|330}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|339}}.</ref> When a companion asked him, “Whom do you love most in this world?” he replied, “Aisha!” When the young man protested that he had meant ''male'' persons, Muhammad corrected his reply to, “Her father.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|57|14}}.</ref> He made himself a doorway in the mosque wall close to Aisha’s house-door,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 173}}; Bewley/Saad 8:45.</ref> presumably to visit her more conveniently. At table he would eat meat from a bone that she had bitten and drink from her cup.<ref>[http://ahadith.co.uk/chapter.php?cid=153&page=8/ Nasa’i 1:70.]</ref> As he once sat repairing his sandals, Aisha stared at him until he asked why. She replied, “Al-Huthali’s poem was written for you! He said that if you looked to the majesty of the moon, it twinkles and lights up the world for everybody to see.” Muhammad walked over to her, kissed her between the eyes, and said, “I swear to Allah, Aisha, you are like that to me and more.”<ref>''Sunan'' al-Bayhaqi #15825.</ref> She asked, “How is your love for me?” and he replied that it was, “Like the rope’s knot.” After that she would often ask, “How is the knot?” and he would reply, “The same as ever!”<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref>

Muhammad allowed Aisha her playtime. Her collection of dolls included at least three shaped like female humans<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and a stuffed horse with wings. Muhammad questioned her about this anomaly but he laughed when she reminded him that Solomon was supposed to have owned winged horses.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4914}}.</ref> Strangely, neither of them mentioned that Muhammad himself claimed to have ridden a winged horse a few years earlier.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 182; {{Bukhari|4|54|429}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|227}}.</ref> Aisha said that (presumably after she grew older) she used to hide her dolls under a garment when Muhammad entered, “but she did not stop.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:47.</ref>

At first her playmates “felt shy of Allah’s Messenger”<ref>{{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and “used to hide themselves” when Muhammad entered her house, “but the Prophet would call them to join and play with me.”<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}</ref> At festival time her friends sang badly and beat tambourines in her house, although Muhammad came to lie down there. Abu Bakr rebuked them: “Musical instruments of Satan near the Prophet!” But Muhammad told the girls not to stop their play for him.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}; {{Bukhari|2|15|72}}.</ref> Later that day, some Abyssinian guests put on a display in the mosque courtyard to demonstrate their prowess with shields and spears. Women were not really allowed, but Muhammad circumvented the regulation by standing in front of Aisha at her front door, screening her with his cloak, so that she could watch the performance without being seen.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}.</ref> She once beat him in a running race. Later, after she had put on weight, they raced again, and he won, remarking, “This pays you back for that other time!”<ref>{{Abudawud|14|2572}}.</ref> Given the chance to mount an unbroken camel, she drove it “round and round” until Muhammad had to remind her to be gentle with the animal.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6275}}; {{Muslim|32|6274}}. See also {{Abudawud|41|4790}}.</ref>

But what these “innocent” episodes demonstrate, above anything else, is that Aisha ''was'' a child. A grown woman does not play with dolls and swings. Aisha was just a little girl who, like any other little girl, was inconsiderate about noise<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|72}}</ref> and could not cook.<ref>Al-Nasa’i 8917 tells an incident where a co-wife declines to eat Aisha’s cooking and Muhammad also avoids tasting it; since politeness compelled people, even if “not hungry,” to accept at least a small portion, the food is presumably not fit to eat. {{Bukhari|3|48|829}} reveals that Aisha usually delegated the daily baking to her maid and did not even watch the rising dough reliably. In Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 227 (see also {{Bukhari|1|7|152}}), the teenaged Aisha is so jealous of a co-wife’s superior culinary skills that she smashes her dish.</ref> While (as shown above) she could be surprisingly assertive towards her elders, she was no match for Muhammad on an ongoing basis. In such a situation of power imbalance, she often resorted to hinting indirectly when she was angry with him, by declaiming, “By the lord of Ibrahim,” instead of her usual, “By the lord of Muhammad.” However, he took the hint.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|155}}.</ref>

===Poverty===

Muhammad taught that women “have the right to their food and clothing in accordance with the custom.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 112-113}}. See also {{Abudawud|11|2137}}.</ref> But he did not provide much food for Aisha, and she was always hungry. She was underweight because she so rarely ate meat.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 494; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> She claimed she never ate barley bread for more than three successive days. Sometimes the family did not light a fire for a month on end because they had nothing to cook but lived off dates and water.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7085}}; {{Muslim|42|7083}}; {{Muslim|42|7086}}; {{Muslim|42|7084}}; {{Muslim|42|7087}}; {{Muslim|42|7089}}; {{Muslim|42|7092}}; {{Muslim|42|7093}}; {{Muslim|42|7097}}; {{Muslim|42|7098}}.</ref> A neighbour once sent Aisha a pudding. While she was finishing her prayers, a cat came in and ate some of it, but she had no compunction in eating from the place that the cat had licked.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|76}}. This incident probably dates from after Aisha was widowed; but she maintained the habits she had learned from Muhammad.</ref>

Muhammad told Aisha, “Beware of sitting with the wealthy, and do not replace a garment until you have already mended it.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:53.</ref> Throughout her life, she disliked discarding worn-out clothes.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:52.</ref> She did own a gown costing about five ''dirhams'' (£25), and “no woman desiring to appear elegant before her husband failed to borrow [it] from me.” But the cloth cannot have been of very high quality compared to what became available in Medina in later decades, for although the widowed Aisha continued to wear similar clothes, her [[Slavery|slave]] refused to wear such a coarse gown in the house.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|796}}.</ref> The mosque had no indoor toilets, “for we loathe and detest them,”<ref>Guilaume/Ishaq 495.</ref> and Aisha did not have a lamp in her house.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|9|492}}.</ref> When her quilt was stolen, she began to curse the unknown thief. However, Muhammad told her not to do so, because curses on earth would only lessen the thief’s punishment in the Hereafter.<ref>{{Abudawud|8|1492}}; {{Abudawud|41|4891}}.</ref>

Charity was a way of life for the Arabs, and of course the Prophet’s young wife had to set the example. In the early years, beggars sat on the Bench in the mosque courtyard waiting for food distribution.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|10|576}}: “The ''Suffa'' companions were poor people, and the Prophet said, ‘Whoever has food for two persons should take a third one from them.’” See also [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life3/chap8.htm/ Muir (1861), pp. 20-21.]</ref> Aisha used to count them until Muhammad told her, “Give and do not calculate, [or else] calculation will be made against you.”<ref>{{Abudawud|9|1696}}.</ref> Sometimes he brought them into her house to be fed, although she struggled to find food “as small in quantity as a pigeon” to serve them.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|5022}}.</ref> On one occasion a beggar came to her door on a fast-day, and Aisha told her maid to give him their only loaf. The servant protested that there would be nothing to break their fast, but Aisha insisted.<ref>{{Muwatta|58|1|5}}.</ref> On another occasion, a widow with two daughters came begging, and Aisha’s larder was reduced to one date. She handed it over, and the widow divided it between the children without taking anything for herself.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6362}}; {{Bukhari|8|73|24}}.</ref> Ibn Kathir, writing seven hundred years after the event, cited this old tradition.
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|The Prophet had sacrificed an animal, and Ayesha was so generous in sharing the meat out amongst the poor that she found that she had left nothing for the Messenger’s large household except the shoulder of the animal. Feeling a little distressed, she went to the Prophet, and said, ‘I’ve only been able to save this.’ ‘That is the only part that you have not saved,’ smiled the Prophet, ‘for whatever you give away in the name of Allah, you save, and whatever you keep for yourself, you lose.’”}}
The shoulder was Muhammad’s favourite part of the sheep.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 516</ref>

The fact that Aisha had a servant does not indicate very much about the comfort-level of her home. Barira was a slave whom Aisha bought for nine ounces of silver (about £1,800) with the specific goal of immediate manumission. As it happened, Barira had nowhere else to go, so she chose to stay with Aisha as a domestic maid.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:181; {{Bukhari|3|47|752}}.</ref> Muhammad put up the silver, which only proves that (largely through the successes of his wars and robberies<ref>For the booty from his battles, see Guillaume/Ishaq 324, 326-327, 438, 466; {{Tabari|7|p. 87}}.</ref>) he by now had some money in his coffer. But he spent his money on arming his warriors,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> bribing the double-minded<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 594-597</ref> or assisting the poor<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521.</ref> (which included such acts as manumitting slaves). According to Aisha, it did not translate to food for his household. “The Prophet of Allah liked three worldly objects – perfume, women and food … He obtained women and perfumes but he did not get food.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:4</ref> The servant Barira was an extra mouth for Muhammad to feed, and she must have been as hungry as her young mistress.

After the conquest of Khaybar in July 628, Muhammad was no longer poor, and Aisha was granted a share of the revenues.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521-523.</ref> She hoped that “at last we will eat our fill of dates.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|547}}. See also {{Muslim|9|3506}} and {{Muslim|9|3510}}, dating from this period.</ref> But if her rations improved, she did not remember it afterwards, so the majority of her sacks of wheat and dates must have been sold for cash or distributed to the poor. On the day Muhammad died, he was “King” of all Arabia, but Aisha’s barrel contained only one handful of barley.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7091}}; Jalalayn’s commentary on Q93:8.</ref>

===See Also===

*[[Qur'an, Hadith and Scholars:Aisha]] (''primary and early sources about Aisha'')
*[[Aisha Age of Consummation|Aisha's Age of Consummation]]
*[[Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aishas Age|Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aisha's Age]]
*[[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha]]
*[[Aisha and Puberty]]
*[[A Refutation of 'The Islamophobe's Glass House']]
*[[Rejecting Dr David Lieperts Aisha Was Older Apologetic Myth|Rejecting Dr. David Liepert's "Aisha Was Older" Apologetic Myth]] ''(Essay)''
*[[Islam and Pedophilia]] ''(Core Article)''
*[[Forced Marriage]]
*[[Muhammad's Wives]] (''Hub Page'')
*[[Aisha (Farsideology)]] (''satire'')

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 1

2013-06-23T09:27:04Z

1234567:

==Aisha bint Abi Bakr, Part 1==

[[File:DanishAisha.jpg|right|thumb|Aisha’s wedding day. Commissioned for Bluitgen, K. (2006). ''Koranen og profeten Muhammeds Liv'' (''The Quran and the Life of the Prophet Muhammad''). Copenhagen: Hoest & Soen. The artist chose to remain anonymous.|300px]]

Aisha bint Abi Bakr claimed that she was the [[Muhammad|Prophet Muhammad’s]] second wife,<ref>{{Muslim|8|3452}}.</ref> although this was not strictly correct.<ref>Aisha must have known that Muhammad married Sawdah bint Zamaa in the ninth month and herself in the tenth month of the same year ({{Tabari|39|pp. 170-171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:43, 55; {{Muslim|8|3312}}). However, the sequence of events in {{Tabari|9|pp. 128-130}} makes it clear that Muhammad did propose to Aisha before he proposed to Sawdah: “Khawlah replied, ‘The Messenger of God has sent me to ask for A’ishah’s hand in marriage on his behalf.’ … Then Khawlah left and went to Sawdah saying, ‘O Sawdah ... the Messenger of God has sent me with a marriage proposal.’” By claiming to be the second wife, i.e., the first after Khadijah, Aisha probably wanted to emphasise that she had been Muhammad’s first choice and was therefore more important than her co-wives.</ref> She is known as Aisha ''al-Siddiqa'' (“the Truthful”)<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref> to complement her father, who was also known as ''al-Siddiq''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46. “Masruq … would say, “The truthful daughter of the true, whose innocence was proclaimed, told me such-and-such.”</ref> This byname originally referred, not to Abu Bakr’s personal honesty, but to his “testimony to the truth” of Muhammad’s miraculous [[The Holy Qur'an: Al-Isra (The Night Journey)|Night Journey]].<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 183.</ref> Muslims consider Aisha another major “witness to the truth” of Muhammad’s prophetic office. The Syrian scholar Ismail ibn Umar ibn Kathir wrote:
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|A great deal of the knowledge that we still have today, about how our beloved Prophet lived and behaved, was first remembered and then taught to others by Aisha … This is what makes it so much easier for those who wish to follow in their footsteps to try and follow their example.}}
Aisha’s witness has bequeathed to the world a wealth of truth about the nature of Islam.

===Aisha’s Background===

Aisha was born in [[Mecca]] “at the beginning of the fourth year of prophethood,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> i.e., between 25 October 613 and 19 February 614.

Her father was the cloth-merchant Abu Bakr ibn Abi Quhafah from the Taym clan of the Quraysh. “He was a man whose society was desired, well liked and of easy manners … of high character and kindliness. His people used to come to him to discuss many matters with him because of his wide knowledge, his experience in commerce, and his sociable nature.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> His generosity had made him popular in the city.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}.</ref> Abu Bakr’s first wife was Qutaylah bint Abduluzza from the Amir ibn Luayy clan of the Quraysh. She bore him a daughter, Asma.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> He then married his business partner’s widow, Umm Ruman (Zaynab) bint Amir. She was an immigrant from the Kinana tribe whose only relative in Mecca was her young son, Tufayl ibn Al-Harith;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Muhammad once said that she looked like a ''houri''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> She was the mother of Abu Bakr’s first son, Abdulrahman.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 171-172}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Qutaylah then bore him a second son, Abdullah;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> but soon afterwards, Abu Bakr divorced Qutaylah.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:178: “Abu Bakr had divorced her in the ''Jahiliyah'',” i.e., before Islam, and therefore not, as is sometimes asserted, because of religious differences.</ref>

The family lived near [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] house<ref>Muir (1861). ''The Life of Mohamet'', p. 100. London: Smith, Elder & Co.</ref> and must have known Muhammad for several years before the latter declared himself a prophet in 610. Abu Bakr “did not hold back or hesitate.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> He was the first male outside Muhammad’s family to convert to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115. According to {{Tabari|39|p. 201}}, one woman, Lubabah bint Al-Harith, claimed that her conversion pre-dated Abu Bakr’s.</ref> “When he became a Muslim, he showed his faith openly and called others to God and his apostle… He began to call to God and to Islam all whom he trusted of those who came to him and sat with him… He brought them to the apostle when they had accepted his invitation and they accepted Islam and prayed.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115, 116.</ref> The earliest Muslim historian, [[Ibn Ishaq|Muhammad ibn Ishaq]], lists fifty people who became Muslims through Abu Bakr’s preaching,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115-117.</ref> which was probably the majority of the earliest converts.

Aisha was born in the year when Islam was first publicly preached in Mecca<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 117.</ref> and she never knew any lifestyle other than Islam.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> She grew up in a household where her mother was the only wife and she had four much-older siblings. The records also mention several servants.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116, 144, 224; </ref> Aisha was still a baby when a pagan neighbour, Al-Mutim ibn Adiy, proposed that she marry his son Jubayr. Abu Bakr informally accepted this proposal but he did not enter a binding marriage contract.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}.</ref> Aisha’s paternal grandparents, already in their seventies at the time of her birth, lived nearby.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Her grandmother, Umm Al-Khayr bint Sakhr, was a Muslim,<ref>Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' vol. 8.</ref> but her grandfather, Abu Quhafah ibn Amir, remained a pagan. When he spoke disparagingly of Muhammad, Abu Bakr hit his father’s chest so hard that the old man became unconscious.<ref>Qurtubi, ''Tafsir'' vol. 17 p. 307. Cited in [http://books.google.com.au/books?id=AeAG74TdAXEC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=false/ Radtke, B., & O’Kane, J. (1996). ''The Concept of Sainthood in Early Islamic Mysticism'', p. 142. Richmond, Surrey: Curzon Press] and also in [http://www.tasawwuf.org/writings/love_prophet/love_abubakr.pdf/ “The Love of Hadrat Abu Bakr”, p. 6, in ''Tasawwuf'']. It is said that Allah sent down {{Quran|58|22}} in response.</ref>

Aisha was less than three years old when the Quraysh declared a blockade against the Hashimite clan.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 159-160.</ref> Abu Bakr considered leaving Mecca to join the exiles in Abyssinia. But he found a protector who agreed to keep the neighbours from harassing him on condition he confined his religion to the privacy of his home and did not try to convert anyone else. Abu Bakr kept to the letter of the agreement and stopped preaching outside his home. But he later built a mosque in the courtyard of his house, where he once again read the Qur’an out loud, and women and youths flocked to hear his preaching. The men challenged his duplicity, and Abu Bakr renounced his protection.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; Guillaume/Ishaq 171.</ref> Nevertheless, the worst recorded attack on Abu Bakr is that “one of the loutish fellows of Quraysh” once threw dust on his head,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 171-172.</ref> an understandable expression of annoyance under the circumstances. Aisha recalled that the ''ayat'' {{Quran|54|46}}, concerning the occasion when the moon was miraculously split in the sky, was first recited in Mecca when she was “a little girl at play,” three or four years old. She did not, however, claim to remember the miracle itself.<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|387}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|388}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|399}}; {{Bukhari|6|61|515}}. The Lebanese scholar Dr [http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Gibril Haddad] says: “The ''hadith'' masters, ''sira'' historians and Qur’anic commentators agree that the splitting of the moon took place about five years before the Holy Prophet’s ''Hijra'' to Madina,” i.e., in 617-618.</ref>

When Aisha was six, the blockade against the Hashimites was revoked, and the clan emerged from hiding in the mountain ravine. After that, Muhammad came to visit her father every morning and evening.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> Aisha never met his wife Khadijah,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|166}}.</ref> who returned to Mecca in poor health and died shortly afterwards.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 191; {{Tabari|39|pp. 4, 161}}; Bewley/Saad 8:12, 152.</ref>

===Reasons for the Marriage===

When Khadijah died in April 620, “the Prophet was terribly grieved over her,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54.</ref> and “people feared for him.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> After only a few days, Khawlah bint Hakim, the sister-in-law of his friend [[Umar al Khattab (quotes)|Umar]],<ref>She was married to Uthman ibn Mazoon (Guillaume/Ishaq 590), whose sister Zaynab was married to Umar (Bewley/Saad 8:56).</ref> decided that he needed a new wife. She called on Muhammad to tell him that she knew of both a maid and a matron whom he might [[Marriage|marry]] and asked which one he would prefer. He immediately responded that he would take them both.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}.</ref>

The maid was Abu Bakr’s daughter. It is often claimed that Muhammad married her “to reinforce the friendly relations already existing with Abu Bakr.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?''].</ref> In one sense this is true: Abu Bakr was one of the few men in Mecca who would still have been willing to give him a daughter.<ref>For Muhammad’s unpopularity with his pagan neighbours, see Guillaume/Ishaq 191-194.</ref> But this assertion mistakes cause and effect. The marriage did not “promote” any alliance with Abu Bakr; rather, it was the existing close bond with Abu Bakr that made the marriage possible. Muhammad’s request to his friend might not even have reflected Khawlah’s original intention, for the oral traditions about Muhammad’s life were first put in writing long after his death,<ref>Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: Its Origin, Development, Special Features and Criticism'', pp. 8-9. “''Hadith'' which thus spread throughout the vast Muslim dominions had been preserved for a century partly in writing (in the form of laws and letters dictated by Muhammad himself, and in the form of various ''Sahifahs'' ascribed to many of his Companions), and partly in the memory of those who had associated with him and watched carefully his words and deeds. After the death of Muhammad, Umar I intended to collect the ''Ahadith''. He gave the matter his careful consideration for one whole month, invoking the help of God in his decision, and seeking the advice of his friends. But he had to give up the great project for fear of the Qur’an being neglected by the Muslims.” Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> and it could be that they have been distorted by narrators who did not know about the interview with Khawlah until they also had hind-knowledge of its result. It is not impossible that Khawlah originally mentioned “Abu Bakr’s daughter” without giving the name, and that she had actually been referring to his elder daughter Asma. Regardless of whether or not Khawlah was complicit in the eventual outcome, what happened was that Muhammad, the Apostle of Allah, completely overlooked the sixteen-year-old Asma<ref>[http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Haddad] cites Al-Dhahabi in ''Siyar Alam al-Nubala'' vol. 2 p. 289: “Asma was ten years older than Aisha.” Haddad points out that Al-Dhahabi elsewhere suggests Asma might have been even older than this, possibly as old as twenty-five.</ref> and asked instead to marry the six-year-old Aisha.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref>

It is also suggested that Muhammad “married Aisha for the benefit of Islam and Humanity … From her, 2210 Hadith have come... Many of her transmissions pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behaviour which only someone in Aisha's position could have learnt.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?'']</ref> There is no evidence to support this theory. If Muhammad had wanted the traditions about his life to be securely transmitted to posterity, he would not have relied on the hope that his young widow might later think of it; he would have arranged to have them committed to writing during his lifetime. He never did. Further, if he had believed that a wife was the best kind of chronicler, he would have chosen an adult spouse who knew how to write. Aisha could in fact read<ref>{{Bukhari|6|61|515}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> but she never learned to write.<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “It is reported that Aisha used to read the Qur’an but she did not write.”</ref>

What Muhammad later said was that [[Allah]] had instructed him to marry Aisha. He said the angel [[Gabriel|Jibreel]] had appeared to him in a dream, holding a veiled child and saying, “Messenger of Allah, this one will remove some of your sorrow. This one has some of the qualities of Khadijah.” Then he lifted the veil, revealing that the child was Aisha.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54-55; {{Muslim|31|5977}}.</ref> In a second dream, Jibreel showed him Aisha’s portrait painted on silk, promising, “She will be your wife in Paradise.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|235}}; {{Bukhari|9|87|140}}.</ref> If Muhammad really had any such dream, it is disturbing that he would act on it so literally.

Muhammad’s decision to marry Aisha was made less than three weeks after Khadijah’s death<ref>Khadijah died on 10 Ramadan, and Muhammad married Sawdah before Ramadan had ended. Even if he married her on the ''same day'' as Khawlah’s visit (the day he also decided to marry Aisha), this was a maximum of twenty days after Khadijah’s death. Common sense suggests that it would have more likely taken a day or two to organise the wedding, which did not necessarily take place as late as the final day of the month.</ref> while he was grieving. He was not necessarily making wise decisions, even from his own point of view. There is little doubt that Muhammad’s choice of Aisha over Asma was influenced by Aisha’s personal qualities. That she was very pretty was conceded by people who had no vested interest<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|435}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|145}}.</ref> as well as by those who might have been biased.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 495; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> She was slim and light-framed<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}}</ref> with a fair, rosy complexion and perhaps also red hair,<ref>In Al-Nasa’i 5:307 and Bewley/Saad 8:55, Muhammad addresses Aisha as ''Humayra'', which means “little red one”. This was not a commonplace nickname, so Aisha’s degree of redness must have been unusual.</ref> which she wore plaited.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|241}}.</ref> Her nephew later said, “I did not see a greater scholar than Aisha in poetry, Arab history and genealogy,”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 67; Al-Hakim, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 4 p. 11. See also Al-Dhahabi, “Aisha, Mother of the Faithful” in ''Tadhkirat al-Huffaz'' p. 1/13.</ref> and it was said that there was no one else “more intelligent in opinion if her opinion was sought.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 2, p. 481.</ref> While we might question whether Muhammad was aware of her intelligence when she was only six years old, she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah,” who is described as “determined and intelligent”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref>

===Marriage Contract===

When Muhammad made his formal request for Aisha’s hand, he did not mention that Allah had “commanded” him to marry her.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> Abu Bakr hesitated at first, saying, “Would this be suitable, since she is like my brother’s daughter?” But Muhammad said that their brotherhood was purely spiritual and did not preclude such a marriage.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref> Abu Bakr had to break off Aisha’s informal engagement to Jubayr ibn Al-Mutim, but this proved easy, as the pagan family no longer wished to risk that their son might convert to Islam.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> So Abu Bakr married his daughter to Muhammad in May or June 620. Unlike Abu Bakr’s previous agreement with Al-Mutim, his contract with Muhammad was not a “betrothal” or “engagement” (as some English translators have suggested) but in every way a legally binding marriage, which could only be dissolved by death or divorce.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|1|7|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|2|3309}}; {{Muslim|2|3310}}; {{Muslim|2|3311}}; {{Muslim|4|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref>

Soon afterwards, Aisha was sent to Muhammad with a basket of dates. As soon as they were alone in the room, Muhammad “stretched out his blessed hand and grabbed her clothes.” Aisha “glared” at him and exclaimed, “People call you The Trustworthy, but to me you are The Treacherous!” She shook him off, rearranged her clothes and went to complain to her father. Abu Bakr showed no anger or even surprise; he only told her that she was now married to Muhammad, who was therefore treating her like a wife.<ref>Abdulrahman Hamdanius, ''Al-Shabayat'', cited in Maracci, L. (1698). ''Vita Mahometis'', p. 23. Padua, Italy: Seminary Printing Press.</ref> While there is no record that Muhammad made any more advances to Aisha as long as she lived in her father’s house (he had probably not expected that a child as young as six would resist him), it is sufficient evidence of his sexual intentions towards her that such an attack should have occurred even once.

Although Aisha heard her father’s words, it seems she did not really understand them, for she later claimed that she had not known that she was married until the very day of the consummation.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43. “I did not know that the Messenger of Allah had married me until my mother took me and made me sit in the room rather than being outside [on the day of the consummation]. Then it occurred to me that I was married.”</ref> That Aisha did not know that she was married was, of course, nothing unusual. Throughout history and in nearly every culture, betrothals have been arranged over cradles, and women in particular have been married without their knowledge, understanding or consent. The fact that Aisha was a child is barely an issue here; no woman of any age should be married without her own consent, whether she is six, sixteen, thirty-six or sixty. However, it is unlikely that any seventh-century Arab grasped “informed consent” in the way the modern West understands it. Muhammad’s similar failure to grasp it betrays that he was no prophet or pioneer of human rights but was simply a normal product of his own culture.

Muhammad instructed Umm Ruman, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position”. One day Aisha complained to her father about her mother. This made Abu Bakr angry with both of them. Umm Ruman “came after” Aisha, who hid behind the front door, “weeping with great distress.” When Muhammad arrived for his daily visit, Aisha told him everything. Muhammad’s eyes “overflowed with tears” as he reminded Umm Ruman, “Didn’t I tell you to watch over Aisha for me?” Umm Ruman tried to give her side of the story, but Muhammad replied, “So what?” Aisha’s mother had to promise, “I will never trouble her again.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> As the specific details have been omitted from this story, it is not apparent whether it was Umm Ruman who was a difficult mother or Aisha who was a difficult child, or even whether it was Abu Bakr who was a difficult husband and father; but it is certain that Muhammad was interfering with another family’s affairs without any interest in knowing all the facts.

In 622 Abu Bakr accompanied Muhammad on his flight (''Hijra'') to [[Medina]]. He took all his savings with him, leaving nothing to support his family, much to the consternation of his elderly father. Asma had to fool her grandfather, who was blind, by touching his hand to a cloth covering a pile of stones and letting him believe they were a sack of coins.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Fortunately it was only a few months before Abu Bakr sent for his family to join him in Medina. Aisha had an adventure on the way: “My camel broke loose. I was sitting in the ''howdah'' with my mother, and she started exclaiming, ‘Alas, my daughter! Alas, you bride!’ But they caught up with our camel after it had safely descended the Lift Valley.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172}); Bewley/Saad 8:44-45.</ref> After the dry heat of Mecca, the emigrants found Medina damp and cool, and several of them were struck by fever. Aisha was bemused by the delirious ramblings of two of Abu Bakr’s servants and asked Muhammad what it meant. Some of the Muslims were so weak that they said their prayers sitting down until Muhammad advised them, “The prayer of the sitter is only half as valuable as the prayer of the stander.” Thereupon they “painfully struggled to their feet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 413-414.</ref> Then Aisha herself became feverish for a whole month, and her hair fell out.<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876.</ref>

===Paedophilia===

After Aisha had recovered, “and my hair had grown back past my earlobes,”<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876</ref> Abu Bakr approached Muhammad and asked him if he would like to consummate the marriage. He did not explain why he suddenly lost his scruples over child-marriage; but Aisha’s illness would have hinted at her mortality, while the flight to Medina must have altered the political landscape unrecognisably, so perhaps Abu Bakr felt the need to confirm his continuing importance in the Muslim hierarchy. The family landscape had also changed, for Abu Bakr had lately acquired a new wife, Habibah bint Kharijah, a Medinan woman whom he visited in the suburbs at a discreet distance from the mosque.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:243. “Habiba bint Kharija ibn Zayd … married Abu Bakr ''as-Siddiq'' and bore him Umm Kulthum.” See also Guillaume/Ishaq 227, 234. P. 681 shows that Habibah never resided near the mosque even after Umm Ruman died. See also {{Tabari|11|pp. 151-152}}.</ref> Perhaps he expected this marriage to produce new financial burdens, although in fact Habibah’s only child, Umm Kulthum, was not to be born until 634.<ref>{{Tabari|11|p. 141 & f769}}; Bewley/Saad 8:243; {{Muwatta|36|33|40}}.</ref> It is worth noting that Habibah’s grandfather was still alive and apparently fit and active.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/AsbabAlnuzol.asp?SoraName=4&Ayah=34&search=yes&img=A/ Al-Wahidi, ''Asbab Al-Nuzul''. Translated by Guezzou, M. (2011). ''Context of Revelation'', Q4:34. Amman, Jordan: Royal Aal al-Bayt Institute for Islamic Thought.]</ref> This suggests that Habibah was a very young woman, which might also have caused Abu Bakr to revise his ideas about the suitable age for a girl to marry.

Muhammad did not express any outrage or disgust at this invitation; instead of correcting his friend’s morality, he merely confessed that he had no cash to pay the dower. Abu Bakr replied that he would provide this.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172-173}}.</ref> The earliest source states that it was a sum of 400 ''dirhams''<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918</ref> (about £2,000), but others say 12½ ounces,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 173, 189}}; {{Muslim|38|3318}; {{Abudawud|11|2101}}; Bewley/Saad 8:118. The ounces were presumably of silver, since the same weight of gold would have had ten times this value. Perhaps the later chroniclers updated for inflation.</ref> which would have been worth 500 ''dirhams'' (£2,500). It is also said that that dower was “some household goods worth 50 ''dirhams''”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44</ref> (£250), so perhaps part of the value was paid in kind.

[[File:Mosque630.jpg|left|thumb|Plan of the mosque at Medina, c. 630. Aisha’s house is at the top left, marked with A.|300px]]

Umm Ruman also cooperated with the new plan. She tried to fatten Aisha up before sending her to Muhammad’s house. Several types of food failed to replace the flesh that she had lost during her illness “till she gave me cucumber with fresh dates to eat. Then I became fat as good.”<ref>{{Abudawud|28|3894}}.</ref> In April or May 623 Aisha, now aged nine, was playing on a swing with some friends when her mother called her over. Still breathless, Aisha was taken to the little house that had just been built into the wall of the mosque, a hut of unbaked bricks with a palm-branch roof, perhaps five metres by four in size.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 172-173; Bewley/Saad 8:121; [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 65.3/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 1:65:3].</ref> When she was brought inside, where some ''ansar'' women wished her good luck, “it occurred to me that I was married. I did not ask her, and my mother was the one who told me.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43.</ref> For some reason, Umm Ruman then departed, leaving the ''ansar'' women to wash and perfume Aisha, dress her up in a red-striped gown and comb her hair. When her father’s friend Muhammad arrived, she was surprised, suggesting that she had still not guessed the identity of her bridegroom, but not afraid. The women left the house, and Muhammad sat her on his lap.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|7|62|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|8|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3310}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Abudawud|41|4915}}; {{Abudawud|41|4917}}; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref> The consummation was not marked by any kind of wedding party or public celebration: “neither a camel nor a sheep was slaughtered for me.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 131}}.</ref> This possibly indicates that, while the Muslim converts did not question Muhammad’s judgment, he knew only too well what his [[Islam and the People of the Book|Jewish]] neighbours would think of his bigamy.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:143. “They envied him because of the number of his wives and they criticised him for that, saying, ‘If he had been a prophet, he would not have desired women.’ The most intense of them in that criticism was Huyayy ibn Akhtab,” the chief of the Nadir tribe. It is probably not a coincidence that, just five years later, Muhammad’s collection of wives included Huyayy’s favourite daughter. It is not stated, however, that Huyayy had a specific objection to Aisha’s extreme youth.</ref>

Aisha said, “I was preferred over the wives of the Prophet,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46</ref> and asked rhetorically, “Which of his wives is more fortunate than I?”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> She was always very proud of her position as the beloved of the Prophet and never recognised that she had been [[Rape in Islam|raped]]. She spoke calmly of the way Muhammad sucked her tongue<ref>{{Abudawud|13|2380}}.</ref> and took baths with her in the same tub,<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|263}}; {{Bukhari|1|6|298}}.</ref> and of how she would then wash the semen off his clothes<ref>{{Bukhari|1|4|229}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|230}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|231}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|232}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|233}}.</ref> and anoint him with perfume<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|267}}.</ref> (his favourite was ''dhikarat al-tayyib'', a blend of musk and ambergris<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:11.</ref>).

Aisha’s acceptance of the situation does not alter the fact that a fifty-two-year-old man should have known better than to engage sexually with a nine-year-old. Most cultures throughout history have understood that a girl should not be touched before puberty. The Jews in Medina most certainly understood it.<ref>Ezekiel 16:7-8; [http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm/ “Prohibited Marriages and Illegitimate Children”] in ''Judaism 101''.</ref> Muslim apologists have tried to plead that Aisha was an early developer for whom “it is most likely her puberty started at 8, and continued till she was 9, and once she was going through puberty and her menses, this made her a lady and not a girl anymore.”<ref>[http://muslim-responses.com/Marriage_with_Aisha/Marriage_with_Aisha_/ Zaatari, S. “A Detailed analysis of the Prophet's Marriage to Aisha”] in ''Muslim Responses''.</ref> But this is not correct. Aisha had still not reached menarche by the age of fourteen and a half, more than five years after the consummation of her marriage. She several times described her fourteen-year-old self as a ''jariya'' (“prepubescent girl”)<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}} also refers to her light weight at the time of the raid on the Mustaliq tribe. {{Muslim|4|1940}} emphasises her “tender age” at the time of the Abyssinian sword-display, which must have happened after the Order of the Veil, since Muhammad had to screen her, i.e., at earliest in March 628.</ref> and in July 628 was still playing with dolls, which were forbidden to adults but permitted to prepubescents.<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}.</ref> Although this could not have been predicted on her wedding day, she actually belonged to the 10% of girls who are latest in reaching puberty.<ref>The [http://www.mum.org/menarage.htm/ mean age of menarche] was 12½ years. This is quite similar to today, when the [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2733039/ standard deviation] is about 18 months. So probably only 5% of Aisha’s contemporaries would have been menstruating before age ten, 16% by age eleven, 32% by age twelve, 68% by age thirteen, 84% by age fourteen, 95% by age fifteen and over 99% by age sixteen. These statistics suggest that Aisha did menstruate within twelve months of the doll-playing incident, but the exact date is not recorded.</ref> At nine, she would have been flat-chested and only three-quarters of her future height; nobody could have mistaken her for an adult. Unlike the informed consent issue, which simply reveals that Muhammad was a product of his culture, this act of paederasty betrays that Muhammad was morally inferior to his own culture. He rejected the moral norms of his wisest contemporaries and abused a little girl for no better reason than that Abu Bakr had made it easy for him to do so. He demonstrated for once and for all that he had no timeless, universal moral insight to offer the world – in short, that he was not a prophet.

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Aisha was to remain Muhammad’s favourite wife.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}.</ref> He claimed that Aisha was dearer to him “than butter with dates”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> and superior to all other women in the same way that a meat stew was superior to plain bread.<ref>{{Bukhari|4|55|623}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|113}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|114}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|329}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|330}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|339}}.</ref> When a companion asked him, “Whom do you love most in this world?” he replied, “Aisha!” When the young man protested that he had meant ''male'' persons, Muhammad corrected his reply to, “Her father.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|57|14}}.</ref> He made himself a doorway in the mosque wall close to Aisha’s house-door,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 173}}; Bewley/Saad 8:45.</ref> presumably to visit her more conveniently. At table he would eat meat from a bone that she had bitten and drink from her cup.<ref>[http://ahadith.co.uk/chapter.php?cid=153&page=8/ Nasa’i 1:70.]</ref> As he once sat repairing his sandals, Aisha stared at him until he asked why. She replied, “Al-Huthali’s poem was written for you! He said that if you looked to the majesty of the moon, it twinkles and lights up the world for everybody to see.” Muhammad walked over to her, kissed her between the eyes, and said, “I swear to Allah, Aisha, you are like that to me and more.”<ref>''Sunan'' al-Bayhaqi #15825.</ref> She asked, “How is your love for me?” and he replied that it was, “Like the rope’s knot.” After that she would often ask, “How is the knot?” and he would reply, “The same as ever!”<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref>

Muhammad allowed Aisha her playtime. Her collection of dolls included at least three shaped like female humans<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and a stuffed horse with wings. Muhammad questioned her about this anomaly but he laughed when she reminded him that Solomon was supposed to have owned winged horses.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4914}}.</ref> Strangely, neither of them mentioned that Muhammad himself claimed to have ridden a winged horse a few years earlier.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 182; {{Bukhari|4|54|429}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|227}}.</ref> Aisha said that (presumably after she grew older) she used to hide her dolls under a garment when Muhammad entered, “but she did not stop.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:47.</ref>

At first her playmates “felt shy of Allah’s Messenger”<ref>{{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and “used to hide themselves” when Muhammad entered her house, “but the Prophet would call them to join and play with me.”<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}</ref> At festival time her friends sang badly and beat tambourines in her house, although Muhammad came to lie down there. Abu Bakr rebuked them: “Musical instruments of Satan near the Prophet!” But Muhammad told the girls not to stop their play for him.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}; {{Bukhari|2|15|72}}.</ref> Later that day, some Abyssinian guests put on a display in the mosque courtyard to demonstrate their prowess with shields and spears. Women were not really allowed, but Muhammad circumvented the regulation by standing in front of Aisha at her front door, screening her with his cloak, so that she could watch the performance without being seen.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}.</ref> She once beat him in a running race. Later, after she had put on weight, they raced again, and he won, remarking, “This pays you back for that other time!”<ref>{{Abudawud|14|2572}}.</ref> Given the chance to mount an unbroken camel, she drove it “round and round” until Muhammad had to remind her to be gentle with the animal.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6275}}; {{Muslim|32|6274}}. See also {{Abudawud|41|4790}}.</ref>

But what these “innocent” episodes demonstrate, above anything else, is that Aisha ''was'' a child. A grown woman does not play with dolls and swings. Aisha was just a little girl who, like any other little girl, was inconsiderate about noise<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|72}}</ref> and could not cook.<ref>Al-Nasa’i 8917 tells an incident where a co-wife declines to eat Aisha’s cooking and Muhammad also avoids tasting it; since politeness compelled people, even if “not hungry,” to accept at least a small portion, the food is presumably not fit to eat. {{Bukhari|3|48|829}} reveals that Aisha usually delegated the daily baking to her maid and did not even watch the rising dough reliably. In Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 227 (see also {{Bukhari|1|7|152}}), the teenaged Aisha is so jealous of a co-wife’s superior culinary skills that she smashes her dish.</ref> While (as shown above) she could be surprisingly assertive towards her elders, she was no match for Muhammad on an ongoing basis. In such a situation of power imbalance, she often resorted to hinting indirectly when she was angry with him, by declaiming, “By the lord of Ibrahim,” instead of her usual, “By the lord of Muhammad.” However, he took the hint.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|155}}.</ref>

===Poverty===

Muhammad taught that women “have the right to their food and clothing in accordance with the custom.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 112-113}}. See also {{Abudawud|11|2137}}.</ref> But he did not provide much food for Aisha, and she was always hungry. She was underweight because she so rarely ate meat.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 494; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> She claimed she never ate barley bread for more than three successive days. Sometimes the family did not light a fire for a month on end because they had nothing to cook but lived off dates and water.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7085}}; {{Muslim|42|7083}}; {{Muslim|42|7086}}; {{Muslim|42|7084}}; {{Muslim|42|7087}}; {{Muslim|42|7089}}; {{Muslim|42|7092}}; {{Muslim|42|7093}}; {{Muslim|42|7097}}; {{Muslim|42|7098}}.</ref> A neighbour once sent Aisha a pudding. While she was finishing her prayers, a cat came in and ate some of it, but she had no compunction in eating from the place that the cat had licked.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|76}}. This incident probably dates from after Aisha was widowed; but she maintained the habits she had learned from Muhammad.</ref>

Muhammad told Aisha, “Beware of sitting with the wealthy, and do not replace a garment until you have already mended it.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:53.</ref> Throughout her life, she disliked discarding worn-out clothes.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:52.</ref> She did own a gown costing about five ''dirhams'' (£25), and “no woman desiring to appear elegant before her husband failed to borrow [it] from me.” But the cloth cannot have been of very high quality compared to what became available in Medina in later decades, for although the widowed Aisha continued to wear similar clothes, her [[Slavery|slave]] refused to wear such a coarse gown in the house.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|796}}.</ref> The mosque had no indoor toilets, “for we loathe and detest them,”<ref>Guilaume/Ishaq 495.</ref> and Aisha did not have a lamp in her house.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|9|492}}.</ref> When her quilt was stolen, she began to curse the unknown thief. However, Muhammad told her not to do so, because curses on earth would only lessen the thief’s punishment in the Hereafter.<ref>{{Abudawud|8|1492}}; {{Abudawud|41|4891}}.</ref>

Charity was a way of life for the Arabs, and of course the Prophet’s young wife had to set the example. In the early years, beggars sat on the Bench in the mosque courtyard waiting for food distribution.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|10|576}}: “The ''Suffa'' companions were poor people, and the Prophet said, ‘Whoever has food for two persons should take a third one from them.’” See also [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life3/chap8.htm/ Muir (1861), pp. 20-21.]</ref> Aisha used to count them until Muhammad told her, “Give and do not calculate, [or else] calculation will be made against you.”<ref>{{Abudawud|9|1696}}.</ref> Sometimes he brought them into her house to be fed, although she struggled to find food “as small in quantity as a pigeon” to serve them.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|5022}}.</ref> On one occasion a beggar came to her door on a fast-day, and Aisha told her maid to give him their only loaf. The servant protested that there would be nothing to break their fast, but Aisha insisted.<ref>{{Muwatta|58|1|5}}.</ref> On another occasion, a widow with two daughters came begging, and Aisha’s larder was reduced to one date. She handed it over, and the widow divided it between the children without taking anything for herself.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6362}}; {{Bukhari|8|73|24}}.</ref> Ibn Kathir, writing seven hundred years after the event, cited this old tradition.
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|The Prophet had sacrificed an animal, and Ayesha was so generous in sharing the meat out amongst the poor that she found that she had left nothing for the Messenger’s large household except the shoulder of the animal. Feeling a little distressed, she went to the Prophet, and said, ‘I’ve only been able to save this.’ ‘That is the only part that you have not saved,’ smiled the Prophet, ‘for whatever you give away in the name of Allah, you save, and whatever you keep for yourself, you lose.’”}}
The shoulder was Muhammad’s favourite part of the sheep.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 516</ref>

The fact that Aisha had a servant does not indicate very much about the comfort-level of her home. Barira was a slave whom Aisha bought for nine ounces of silver (about £1,800) with the specific goal of immediate manumission. As it happened, Barira had nowhere else to go, so she chose to stay with Aisha as a domestic maid.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:181; {{Bukhari|3|47|752}}.</ref> Muhammad put up the silver, which only proves that (largely through the successes of his wars and robberies<ref>For the booty from his battles, see Guillaume/Ishaq 324, 326-327, 438, 466; {{Tabari|7|p. 87}}.</ref>) he by now had some money in his coffer. But he spent his money on arming his warriors,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> bribing the double-minded<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 594-597</ref> or assisting the poor<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521.</ref> (which included such acts as manumitting slaves). According to Aisha, it did not translate to food for his household. “The Prophet of Allah liked three worldly objects – perfume, women and food … He obtained women and perfumes but he did not get food.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:4</ref> The servant Barira was an extra mouth for Muhammad to feed, and she must have been as hungry as her young mistress.

After the conquest of Khaybar in July 628, Muhammad was no longer poor, and Aisha was granted a share of the revenues.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521-523.</ref> She hoped that “at last we will eat our fill of dates.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|547}}. See also {{Muslim|9|3506}} and {{Muslim|9|3510}}, dating from this period.</ref> But if her rations improved, she did not remember it afterwards, so the majority of her sacks of wheat and dates must have been sold for cash or distributed to the poor. On the day Muhammad died, he was “King” of all Arabia, but Aisha’s barrel contained only one handful of barley.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7091}}; Jalalayn’s commentary on Q93:8.</ref>

===See Also===

*[[Qur'an, Hadith and Scholars:Aisha]] (''primary and early sources about Aisha'')
*[[Aisha Age of Consummation|Aisha's Age of Consummation]]
*[[Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aishas Age|Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aisha's Age]]
*[[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha]]
*[[Aisha and Puberty]]
*[[A Refutation of 'The Islamophobe's Glass House']]
*[[Rejecting Dr David Lieperts Aisha Was Older Apologetic Myth|Rejecting Dr. David Liepert's "Aisha Was Older" Apologetic Myth]] ''(Essay)''
*[[Islam and Pedophilia]] ''(Core Article)''
*[[Forced Marriage]]
*[[Muhammad's Wives]] (''Hub Page'')
*[[Aisha (Farsideology)]] (''satire'')

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-22T16:07:11Z

1234567: /* Relationship with Muhammad */

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to Mecca and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza’a tribe. [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded, “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that Asad’s family were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab’s children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists some of Riyab’s clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab’s son Jahsh married Umama (or Umayma) bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their six children were Muhammad’s first cousins.

# '''Abd''', the first of the sons, was born blind. “He used to go all round Mecca from top to bottom without anyone to lead him. He was a poet.” He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Al-Faraa, and in later life he was always known by his ''kunya'' Abu Ahmad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>
# '''Abdullah''' was the second son.
# '''Zaynab''' was born c. 590. The birth-order of the daughters is not known.
# '''Ubaydullah''' (“little Abdullah”) was the third son. He came under the influence of Zayd ibn Amr and became a monotheist.<ref></ref> He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Ramlah. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older. He died in Abyssinia in late 627.
# '''Habibah''' (also known as '''Umm Habib''') married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf al-Zuhri. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.
# '''Hamnah''' was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan.<ref></ref> He died at Uhud in March 625.<ref></ref> She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.<ref></ref>

It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72; {{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: “''Zaynab bint Jahsh ... said, 'O Messenger of God, I cannot give my consent, for I am a widow of the Quraysh.’” Strictly speaking, these words do not even prove ''how many'' husbands Zaynab had already had. It is in theory possible that she was married more than once in Mecca although, to be parsimonious, we shall here assume that there was only one husband.</ref> He was a Quraysh, but probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab’s declaration that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was asserted in order to emphasise his high social status; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca. It is safe to say that her husband was approved by Abu Sufyan, who had arranged for two of her brothers to marry his own daughters.<ref></ref>

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. Firstly, she had a child. She was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). “Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: “her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means “Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was not a by-name but a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. It is unlikely that Zaynab had any further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of the Jahsh family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, we must address the decided strangeness of her husband's anonymity. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. The lists include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing from the list. It is more likely because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, the information had been lost. If nobody remembered his name, this suggests that Zaynab did not talk about him very much. Perhaps she had loved him so much or hated him so much that she could not bear to speak his name; or perhaps the marriage had been so short-lived, or he had spent so much of it travelling away from home, that he had made very little impression on her. But Zaynab was not the only silent person here. Other people must have known her first husband: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin, their friends who emigrated with them. Yet all are silent on both the good and the bad.

===Islam===

Zaynab was about twenty years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Another cousin, Abu Salama ibn Abdulasad, was among the earliest converts to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in Ibn Ishaq’s list of “those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr’s invitation,” but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615.<ref></ref> This suggests that Zaynab was converted<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. Zaynab’s single siblings soon married into the small Muslim community: Abdullah to the Hilal widow Zaynab bint Khuzayma, “Mother of the Poor”; Habibah to the newly divorced Abdulrahman ibn Awf, a wealthy merchant who was related to Muhammad’s mother; and Hamnah to Masood ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan. Abu Sufyan’s daughters, the wives of Abu Ahmad and Ubaydullah, also became Muslims;<ref></ref> but the lists of early converts do not include anyone who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. While they specifically note those men whose widows later married Muhammad,<ref></ref> there is no such notice about Zaynab, so her husband probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama did not become a Muslim either.<ref>The biographies of Abdulmuttalib's six daughters in Bewley/Saad 8:29-state that Safiya, Arwa and Atiqa became Muslims but say nothing about Umm Hakim, Barrah or Umama. {{Tabari|39|p. 198}} explains that Umm Hakim died before Islam; however, Umama was still alive in 628.</ref>

After 613 the Quraysh began a campaign of persecuting vulnerable Muslims. Zaynab’s family was under the protection of Abu Sufyan and therefore the worst that could be done to them was that their businesses were boycotted, though apparently not very systematically.<ref></ref> In 615 Abdullah, Ubaydullah and their two brothers-in-law joined the emigration to Abyssinia. Zaynab’s father Jahsh also left Mecca, although apparently not as part of the general exile to Abyssinia. As it happened, Jahsh never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Ubaydullah took his wife to Abyssinia with him,<ref>It is not certain that Abdullah was still married; he divorced Zaynab bint Khuzayma at some unknown date.</ref> but Zaynab’s two sisters were left behind. This was apparently because the journey to Abyssinia was deemed a terrible sacrifice and hardship, and women were not subjected to it if they would be safe in Mecca. It is not entirely clear who was protecting Zaynab and her sisters; but no harm befell them, so perhaps the Quraysh assumed that men were the real problem and did not target women. After most of the persecuted slaves recanted their faith, the Quraysh declared a trade boycott on Muhammad’s clan; they showed no interest in the handful of women who had married respectable pagan men.

Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619,<ref></ref> but Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia until his death in 627.<ref></ref>

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. By this time Zaynab was a widow, although there is no information about how or when her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref>

Although it was a large party of over twenty people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref></ref> He locked up the house, leaving citizens who passed it to sigh over “its doors blowing to and fro, empty of inhabitants” and pontificate that, “''Every house however long its prosperity lasts will one day be overtaken by misfortune and trouble.'' The house of the Jahsh clan has become tenantless.” Abu Jahl said, “Nobody will weep over that. This is the work of this man’s nephew [Muhammad]. He has divided our community, disrupted our affairs, and driven a wedge between us.”"<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215.</ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house and sold it for his own profit.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> Abdullah was angry about this,<ref></ref> saying that his family had chosen to ally with Abu Sufyan when they had received plenty of good offers from other Quraysh families.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> Muhammad, however, told him to be content with the treasures of Paradise.<ref></ref>. Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but it is quite likely that he had some sort of legal right over the property and had lent, leased or given it to the Jahshites on the understanding that they were his allies. By abandoning the house in order to ally so openly with Muhammad, who had declared war on Mecca,<ref></ref> Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection. It is unlikely that many of the Meccans disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally.

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with Abdullah, his wife Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh and their young son Muhammad.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173</ref>

Muhammad arrived in September 622.<ref></ref> He built the mosque;<ref></ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref></ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, an enterprise in which Abdullah was quite active.<ref></ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref></ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and Zaynab assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother thought at first that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.<ref></ref>

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. He did not want to marry Zaynab. He was proposing that she marry his adopted son Zayd.<ref></ref> Further, it was about this time that he married both Hafsa bint Umar<ref></ref> and Zaynab bint Khuzayma.<ref></ref> It was also at this time that he ruled that four was the maximum number of wives.<ref></ref> Zaynab could not have been more thoroughly rejected.

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. His father and uncle came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad then took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “a short, flat-nosed man, of a very dark brown skin” and “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until about 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

So Zayd already had two wives, not counting his divorced wife and his future heavenly bride, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. It is not mentioned whether anyone had asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife. The person who did not co-operate was Zaynab.

The reason Zaynab gave for refusing the proposal was “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}; Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> This probably meant that she considered herself too highborn to marry a former slave. Perhaps this reflects the insecurity of Zaynab’s ''nouveau riche'' origins – she was an Umayyad and yet not an Umayyad. But even if she was not fully Umayyad, her mother and first husband had still been fully Quraysh, while Zayd was not even Meccan.<ref>The Quraysh were the “nobility” of Mecca, but other tribes lived there too. The wealthy Hilal might be considered the equivalent of the “bourgeoisie”, while the Khuza’a were merely respectable. Residents from other tribes tended to be poor; they protected themselves by becoming the vassals of the important people. Lowest in the social pyramid was the slave class.</ref> The Meccans could be snobbish about “foreigners”, even if they were third-generation immigrants like Zaynab.<ref></ref> If Zaynab married a newcomer like Zayd, there would be a permanent spotlight on her own foreign origins.

Zaynab did not mention Zayd’s physical appearance, but it is possible that she had further objections in that direction. First, he was ugly,<ref></ref> and she might have felt a simple physical repulsion. Second, although he traced his ancestry to an Arab tribe,<ref></ref> this might well have been by adoption rather than biology, for his “flat nose” and “very dark skin”<ref></ref> suggest that his genes were from Africa. The Arabs could be very racist about this.<ref></ref> Although Zayd had been born a freeman among the Udhra, it is quite possible that his parents or grandparents had originally been their slaves.

While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab that she would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that she had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, she should not have needed to justify her reason. Finally, it must be stressed that Zaynab was being asked to accept the position of third wife. Added to the other social humiliations of the proposed union, this made the offer close to insulting. There were still plenty of bachelors in the emigrant community,<ref></ref> and all her siblings were at that date in monogamous marriages.<ref></ref>

Abdullah supported his sister’s refusal.<ref>Q33:36; Tabari 39: 6-10, 180; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''.</ref><ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|249}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|829}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|6883}}.</ref>

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref> But for some reason he was determined that this marriage should take place. He announced a revelation from Allah: “''It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error.''”<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}.</ref> “This was revealed regarding Abdullah ibn Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out, for they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself. But afterwards they consented because of the verse. Thus the Prophet gave her in marriage to Zayd.”<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned.

The fortunes of the Jahsh family were changed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625. The Meccans attacked Medina in revenge for the Muslim aggression at Badr twelve months earlier. Muhammad suffered the worst defeat of his career when he was routed and his army was decimated.<ref></ref> Seventy Muslims were killed but 66 of them were new converts from Medina,<ref></ref> so Muhammad was at risk of losing the sympathies of his hosts. Zaynab’s sister Hamna was serving as a battle-auxiliary and was told that, of the four Meccan casualties, one was her uncle Hamza, whose corpse had been nastily mutilated. She calmly replied, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her brother Abdullah had also been killed<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> and mutlated. Hamna repeated, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her husband Musab had been slain. At this point she burst into tears and could not say any more than, “What will become of his children?”<ref></ref>

A few days later, Zaynab received a visit from Hind’s daughter Zaynab, who would have been about nine years old.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref><ref>The hadith does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned had whom, by the time of his death, she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.</ref> It is not surprising that Zaynab was on visiting terms with Hind and her daughter, for Zaynab’s aunt had been Hind’s stepmother;<ref></ref> they would have been acquainted all their lives, even before they both counted among the earliest converts to Islam. The prohibition on displays of grief<ref></ref> must have been hard for bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The death of Abdullah was significant for Zaynab because she lost her chief protector.

Hamnah had barely completed her ''idda'' before she was remarried to a kinsman of Abu Bakr, Talhah ibn Ubaydullah, a thirty-year-old bachelor. Although he later became a polygamist, Hamnah was his only wife for several years. Hamza’s widow also found a new husband, but Abdullah’s widow never remarried; she had a bleeding disorder that raised doubts about her ritual cleanness. Although the exact sequence of events is unclear, it was at about this time that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd. The death of Abdullah<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> might have been the real reason that Zaynab eventually became persuadable.

Zaynab submitted to the spiritual blackmail and married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

It is often proposed that Muhammad arranged the marriage of Zayd and Zaynab to show that “class distinctions are abolished in Islam.” Typical comments are: “The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered.”<ref></ref>

There is little evidence, however, that Muhammad really thought that way. He certainly did not say so at the time; the only reason he gave Zaynab was, “I want you to marry him.”<ref></ref> If Muhammad really had wanted to promote marriage across the social divide, it would have made more sense to support a naturally occurring example, i.e., to praise two people from different backgrounds who wanted to marry each other despite the disapproval of the wealthier family or favoured race. But he did not; rather, he taught that a woman needed her guardian’s consent for a marriage to be valid.<ref></ref> Since families in seventh-century Arabia (as in most other cultures throughout history) usually arranged marriages to maximise economic advantage to both families, the practical result was that most people married someone of a similar social background. Muhammad’s open admission that money and social connections were two of the main reasons why anyone would marry<ref>The other two reasons were physical attraction and good character. He did concede that character was the best motive of the four, although there is no evidence that he selected any of his own wives primarily for that reason.</ref> By pressuring Zaynab into marrying a man whom she did not want, Muhammad was setting up an unhappy marriage. If he was demonstrating anything at all about social differences, it was therefore the opposite point – that marriage across the social divide is ''not'' a good idea.

There were no obvious political or economic reasons why Zayd and Zaynab needed to marry. Zayd was presumably living off his second wife’s date-orchard, while Zaynab supported herself through her leather-crafts. They were already on the same side of every political situation – both strong supporters of Muhammad – and a closer alliance between them would not in any way promote a stronger loyalty to Muhammad. While we do not really know why Muhammad was so insistent about this marriage, we can only guess that he did it to please Zayd. Again, while we do not know why Zayd wanted to marry someone with whom – as time would show – he had little in common, Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> Muhammad paid the dower.<ref></ref>

All was quiet for a couple of years.

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>Majlisi, in ''Hayat al-Qulub'', states that she was “in the bath.” This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources. Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab’s movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

"In this year the Messenger married Zaynab b Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd b Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|pp. 1-2}}.</ref>

When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Anas narrated. Zayd ibn Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), ‘Fear Allah and keep your wife.’” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart what Allah was about to reveal. He was to reveal thy love for her and that, should Zayd part with her, thou wouldst marry her, and thou fearedst that people would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’ But it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had finished with her, after the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there might be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.”<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Bukhari||60|310}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref> Thabit confirmed that this verse “was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd ibn Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref> Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

“When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.” When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37.|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So he desired her and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd who then understood (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Zayd left her, and she became free.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref>
Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref>
“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>
Muslims have not adopted children since that day. Muslim couples can still foster children as an act of charity, but these children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological relatives.

Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, “While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Aisha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.””<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. The traditional view is that Allah commanded Muhammad to marry Zaynab. There was no need to seek a reason. It was Allah’s will.

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

Traditional Muslims have no problem with this story. Since Muhammad was the “perfect man,” anything he did must have been by definition an “excellent example”. But it has made Westernised Muslims uncomfortable. They have tried to deny that it happened.

"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad continued to find wives for Zayd. In 628, at Muhammad’s order, he married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and probably much younger.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:162-163.</ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr’s sister (and Khadijah’s niece) Hind.<ref></ref> Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmad married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> "The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref> No unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.

When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.

Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.”

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref> “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.” She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. Zaynab’s house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks. The subsequent houses were also of palm-branches, but Zaynab’s was unique because it was the only one of the nine that was built with an attic (''mashruba'') that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}; {{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref> Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref> Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref> Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref> Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsa<ref> Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref> – in that order – and that his least-favourite was Sawda. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was fervent in prayer. “It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.” IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawda’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawda was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawda was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again.<ref></ref>

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

She died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref> Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref> Umar Zaynab’s her funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmed carried her into her grave.<ref></ref> She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that “it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

''When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref>

The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-22T16:06:09Z

1234567: /* Third Marriage */

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-22T16:00:22Z

1234567:

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to Mecca and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza’a tribe. [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded, “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that Asad’s family were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab’s children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists some of Riyab’s clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab’s son Jahsh married Umama (or Umayma) bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their six children were Muhammad’s first cousins.

# '''Abd''', the first of the sons, was born blind. “He used to go all round Mecca from top to bottom without anyone to lead him. He was a poet.” He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Al-Faraa, and in later life he was always known by his ''kunya'' Abu Ahmad.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214.</ref>
# '''Abdullah''' was the second son.
# '''Zaynab''' was born c. 590. The birth-order of the daughters is not known.
# '''Ubaydullah''' (“little Abdullah”) was the third son. He came under the influence of Zayd ibn Amr and became a monotheist.<ref></ref> He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Ramlah. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older. He died in Abyssinia in late 627.
# '''Habibah''' (also known as '''Umm Habib''') married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf al-Zuhri. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.
# '''Hamnah''' was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan.<ref></ref> He died at Uhud in March 625.<ref></ref> She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.<ref></ref>

It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72; {{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: “''Zaynab bint Jahsh ... said, 'O Messenger of God, I cannot give my consent, for I am a widow of the Quraysh.’” Strictly speaking, these words do not even prove ''how many'' husbands Zaynab had already had. It is in theory possible that she was married more than once in Mecca although, to be parsimonious, we shall here assume that there was only one husband.</ref> He was a Quraysh, but probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab’s declaration that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was asserted in order to emphasise his high social status; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca. It is safe to say that her husband was approved by Abu Sufyan, who had arranged for two of her brothers to marry his own daughters.<ref></ref>

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. Firstly, she had a child. She was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). “Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: “her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means “Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was not a by-name but a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. It is unlikely that Zaynab had any further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of the Jahsh family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, we must address the decided strangeness of her husband's anonymity. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. The lists include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing from the list. It is more likely because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, the information had been lost. If nobody remembered his name, this suggests that Zaynab did not talk about him very much. Perhaps she had loved him so much or hated him so much that she could not bear to speak his name; or perhaps the marriage had been so short-lived, or he had spent so much of it travelling away from home, that he had made very little impression on her. But Zaynab was not the only silent person here. Other people must have known her first husband: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin, their friends who emigrated with them. Yet all are silent on both the good and the bad.

===Islam===

Zaynab was about twenty years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Another cousin, Abu Salama ibn Abdulasad, was among the earliest converts to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in Ibn Ishaq’s list of “those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr’s invitation,” but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615.<ref></ref> This suggests that Zaynab was converted<ref>{{Tabari|39|180}}.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. Zaynab’s single siblings soon married into the small Muslim community: Abdullah to the Hilal widow Zaynab bint Khuzayma, “Mother of the Poor”; Habibah to the newly divorced Abdulrahman ibn Awf, a wealthy merchant who was related to Muhammad’s mother; and Hamnah to Masood ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan. Abu Sufyan’s daughters, the wives of Abu Ahmad and Ubaydullah, also became Muslims;<ref></ref> but the lists of early converts do not include anyone who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. While they specifically note those men whose widows later married Muhammad,<ref></ref> there is no such notice about Zaynab, so her husband probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama did not become a Muslim either.<ref>The biographies of Abdulmuttalib's six daughters in Bewley/Saad 8:29-state that Safiya, Arwa and Atiqa became Muslims but say nothing about Umm Hakim, Barrah or Umama. {{Tabari|39|p. 198}} explains that Umm Hakim died before Islam; however, Umama was still alive in 628.</ref>

After 613 the Quraysh began a campaign of persecuting vulnerable Muslims. Zaynab’s family was under the protection of Abu Sufyan and therefore the worst that could be done to them was that their businesses were boycotted, though apparently not very systematically.<ref></ref> In 615 Abdullah, Ubaydullah and their two brothers-in-law joined the emigration to Abyssinia. Zaynab’s father Jahsh also left Mecca, although apparently not as part of the general exile to Abyssinia. As it happened, Jahsh never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Ubaydullah took his wife to Abyssinia with him,<ref>It is not certain that Abdullah was still married; he divorced Zaynab bint Khuzayma at some unknown date.</ref> but Zaynab’s two sisters were left behind. This was apparently because the journey to Abyssinia was deemed a terrible sacrifice and hardship, and women were not subjected to it if they would be safe in Mecca. It is not entirely clear who was protecting Zaynab and her sisters; but no harm befell them, so perhaps the Quraysh assumed that men were the real problem and did not target women. After most of the persecuted slaves recanted their faith, the Quraysh declared a trade boycott on Muhammad’s clan; they showed no interest in the handful of women who had married respectable pagan men.

Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619,<ref></ref> but Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia until his death in 627.<ref></ref>

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. By this time Zaynab was a widow, although there is no information about how or when her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref>

Although it was a large party of over twenty people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref></ref> He locked up the house, leaving citizens who passed it to sigh over “its doors blowing to and fro, empty of inhabitants” and pontificate that, “''Every house however long its prosperity lasts will one day be overtaken by misfortune and trouble.'' The house of the Jahsh clan has become tenantless.” Abu Jahl said, “Nobody will weep over that. This is the work of this man’s nephew [Muhammad]. He has divided our community, disrupted our affairs, and driven a wedge between us.”"<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 214-215.</ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house and sold it for his own profit.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> Abdullah was angry about this,<ref></ref> saying that his family had chosen to ally with Abu Sufyan when they had received plenty of good offers from other Quraysh families.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> Muhammad, however, told him to be content with the treasures of Paradise.<ref></ref>. Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but it is quite likely that he had some sort of legal right over the property and had lent, leased or given it to the Jahshites on the understanding that they were his allies. By abandoning the house in order to ally so openly with Muhammad, who had declared war on Mecca,<ref></ref> Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection. It is unlikely that many of the Meccans disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally.

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with Abdullah, his wife Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh and their young son Muhammad.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173</ref>

Muhammad arrived in September 622.<ref></ref> He built the mosque;<ref></ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref></ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, an enterprise in which Abdullah was quite active.<ref></ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref></ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and Zaynab assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother thought at first that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.<ref></ref>

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. He did not want to marry Zaynab. He was proposing that she marry his adopted son Zayd.<ref></ref> Further, it was about this time that he married both Hafsa bint Umar<ref></ref> and Zaynab bint Khuzayma.<ref></ref> It was also at this time that he ruled that four was the maximum number of wives.<ref></ref> Zaynab could not have been more thoroughly rejected.

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. His father and uncle came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad then took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “a short, flat-nosed man, of a very dark brown skin” and “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until about 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

So Zayd already had two wives, not counting his divorced wife and his future heavenly bride, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. It is not mentioned whether anyone had asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife. The person who did not co-operate was Zaynab.

The reason Zaynab gave for refusing the proposal was “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}; Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> This probably meant that she considered herself too highborn to marry a former slave. Perhaps this reflects the insecurity of Zaynab’s ''nouveau riche'' origins – she was an Umayyad and yet not an Umayyad. But even if she was not fully Umayyad, her mother and first husband had still been fully Quraysh, while Zayd was not even Meccan.<ref>The Quraysh were the “nobility” of Mecca, but other tribes lived there too. The wealthy Hilal might be considered the equivalent of the “bourgeoisie”, while the Khuza’a were merely respectable. Residents from other tribes tended to be poor; they protected themselves by becoming the vassals of the important people. Lowest in the social pyramid was the slave class.</ref> The Meccans could be snobbish about “foreigners”, even if they were third-generation immigrants like Zaynab.<ref></ref> If Zaynab married a newcomer like Zayd, there would be a permanent spotlight on her own foreign origins.

Zaynab did not mention Zayd’s physical appearance, but it is possible that she had further objections in that direction. First, he was ugly,<ref></ref> and she might have felt a simple physical repulsion. Second, although he traced his ancestry to an Arab tribe,<ref></ref> this might well have been by adoption rather than biology, for his “flat nose” and “very dark skin”<ref></ref> suggest that his genes were from Africa. The Arabs could be very racist about this.<ref></ref> Although Zayd had been born a freeman among the Udhra, it is quite possible that his parents or grandparents had originally been their slaves.

While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab that she would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that she had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, she should not have needed to justify her reason. Finally, it must be stressed that Zaynab was being asked to accept the position of third wife. Added to the other social humiliations of the proposed union, this made the offer close to insulting. There were still plenty of bachelors in the emigrant community,<ref></ref> and all her siblings were at that date in monogamous marriages.<ref></ref>

Abdullah supported his sister’s refusal.<ref>Q33:36; Tabari 39: 6-10, 180; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''.</ref><ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|249}}; {{Bukhari|1|3|829}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|6883}}.</ref>

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref> But for some reason he was determined that this marriage should take place. He announced a revelation from Allah: “''It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error.''”<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}.</ref> “This was revealed regarding Abdullah ibn Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd ibn Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out, for they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself. But afterwards they consented because of the verse. Thus the Prophet gave her in marriage to Zayd.”<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref> In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned.

The fortunes of the Jahsh family were changed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625. The Meccans attacked Medina in revenge for the Muslim aggression at Badr twelve months earlier. Muhammad suffered the worst defeat of his career when he was routed and his army was decimated.<ref></ref> Seventy Muslims were killed but 66 of them were new converts from Medina,<ref></ref> so Muhammad was at risk of losing the sympathies of his hosts. Zaynab’s sister Hamna was serving as a battle-auxiliary and was told that, of the four Meccan casualties, one was her uncle Hamza, whose corpse had been nastily mutilated. She calmly replied, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her brother Abdullah had also been killed<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> and mutlated. Hamna repeated, “From Allah we come and to him we return.” Then she was told that her husband Musab had been slain. At this point she burst into tears and could not say any more than, “What will become of his children?”<ref></ref>

A few days later, Zaynab received a visit from Hind’s daughter Zaynab, who would have been about nine years old.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref><ref>The hadith does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned had whom, by the time of his death, she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.</ref> It is not surprising that Zaynab was on visiting terms with Hind and her daughter, for Zaynab’s aunt had been Hind’s stepmother;<ref></ref> they would have been acquainted all their lives, even before they both counted among the earliest converts to Islam. The prohibition on displays of grief<ref></ref> must have been hard for bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The death of Abdullah was significant for Zaynab because she lost her chief protector.

Hamnah had barely completed her ''idda'' before she was remarried to a kinsman of Abu Bakr, Talhah ibn Ubaydullah, a thirty-year-old bachelor. Although he later became a polygamist, Hamnah was his only wife for several years. Hamza’s widow also found a new husband, but Abdullah’s widow never remarried; she had a bleeding disorder that raised doubts about her ritual cleanness. Although the exact sequence of events is unclear, it was at about this time that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd. The death of Abdullah<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> might have been the real reason that Zaynab eventually became persuadable.

Zaynab submitted to the spiritual blackmail and married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

It is often proposed that Muhammad arranged the marriage of Zayd and Zaynab to show that “class distinctions are abolished in Islam.” Typical comments are: “The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered.”<ref></ref>

There is little evidence, however, that Muhammad really thought that way. He certainly did not say so at the time; the only reason he gave Zaynab was, “I want you to marry him.”<ref></ref> If Muhammad really had wanted to promote marriage across the social divide, it would have made more sense to support a naturally occurring example, i.e., to praise two people from different backgrounds who wanted to marry each other despite the disapproval of the wealthier family or favoured race. But he did not; rather, he taught that a woman needed her guardian’s consent for a marriage to be valid.<ref></ref> Since families in seventh-century Arabia (as in most other cultures throughout history) usually arranged marriages to maximise economic advantage to both families, the practical result was that most people married someone of a similar social background. Muhammad’s open admission that money and social connections were two of the main reasons why anyone would marry<ref>The other two reasons were physical attraction and good character. He did concede that character was the best motive of the four, although there is no evidence that he selected any of his own wives primarily for that reason.</ref> By pressuring Zaynab into marrying a man whom she did not want, Muhammad was setting up an unhappy marriage. If he was demonstrating anything at all about social differences, it was therefore the opposite point – that marriage across the social divide is ''not'' a good idea.

There were no obvious political or economic reasons why Zayd and Zaynab needed to marry. Zayd was presumably living off his second wife’s date-orchard, while Zaynab supported herself through her leather-crafts. They were already on the same side of every political situation – both strong supporters of Muhammad – and a closer alliance between them would not in any way promote a stronger loyalty to Muhammad. While we do not really know why Muhammad was so insistent about this marriage, we can only guess that he did it to please Zayd. Again, while we do not know why Zayd wanted to marry someone with whom – as time would show – he had little in common, Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> Muhammad paid the dower.<ref></ref>

All was quiet for a couple of years.

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>Majlisi, in ''Hayat al-Qulub'', states that she was “in the bath.” This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources. Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab’s movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

"In this year the Messenger married Zaynab b Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd b Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|pp. 1-2}}.</ref>

When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref> “Anas narrated. Zayd ibn Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), ‘Fear Allah and keep your wife.’” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart what Allah was about to reveal. He was to reveal thy love for her and that, should Zayd part with her, thou wouldst marry her, and thou fearedst that people would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’ But it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had finished with her, after the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there might be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.”<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Bukhari||60|310}}; Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref> Thabit confirmed that this verse “was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd ibn Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref> Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” <ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

“When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.” When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37.|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So he desired her and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd who then understood (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref>

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

“Zayd left her, and she became free. While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Aisha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.””<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref>
Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}; {{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref>
“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>
Muslims have not adopted children since that day. Muslim couples can still foster children as an act of charity, but these children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological relatives.

Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then happily announced to Aisha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” While Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

====Islamo-Apology for the Marriage====

Traditional Muslims have no problem with this story. Since Muhammad was the “perfect man,” anything he did must have been by definition an “excellent example”. But it has made Westernised Muslims uncomfortable. They have tried to deny that it happened.

"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Reasons for Third Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. The traditional view is that Allah commanded Muhammad to marry Zaynab. There was no need to seek a reason. It was Allah’s will.

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmed married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> "The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad continued to find wives for Zayd. In 628, at Muhammad’s order, he married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and probably much younger.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:162-163.</ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr’s sister (and Khadijah’s niece) Hind.<ref></ref> Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref> No unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.

When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.

Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.”

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref> “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.” She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. Zaynab’s house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks. The subsequent houses were also of palm-branches, but Zaynab’s was unique because it was the only one of the nine that was built with an attic (''mashruba'') that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}; {{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref> Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref> Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref> Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref> Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsa<ref> Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref> – in that order – and that his least-favourite was Sawda. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

===Islam===

Zaynab was fervent in prayer. “It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.” IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawda’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawda was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawda was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again.<ref></ref>

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

She died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81; {{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref> Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref> Umar Zaynab’s her funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmed carried her into her grave.<ref></ref> She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that “it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

''When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref>

The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-22T05:34:12Z

1234567: /* Background */

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to Mecca and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza’a tribe. [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded, “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that the Asad were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab’s children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists some of Riyab’s clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab’s son Jahsh married Umama bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their six children were his first cousins. The birth-order of their daughters is not certain.

# Abd, the first of the sons, was born blind. “He could find his way around Mecca without a guide.” He was a poet. He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter and in later life he was always known by his ''kunya'' Abu Ahmad.
# Abdullah was the second son. He married Zaynab b Khuzayma (who later married Muhammad). He also married Fatima b Abi Hubaysh, by whom he had one son, Muhammad ibn Abdullah. He died at Uhud on 22 March 625.
# Zaynab was born c. 590.
# Ubaydullah (“little Abdullah”) was the third son. He was a spiritual seeker. He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older. He died in Abyssinia in late 627.
# Habibah (also known as Umm Habib) married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.
# Hamnah was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, who died at Uhud in March 625. She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.

It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Her words, "I am a widow," spoken in 624 or 625, do not even prove ''how many'' husbands she had had. While it is parsimonious to assume that it was only one, we note here that it is in theory possible that Zaynab was married more than once in Mecca.</ref> He appears to have been a Quraysh of respectable status. He was probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab's statement that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was deliberately asserted to emphasise his social rank; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca.

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. First, she was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). "Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: "her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means "Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. Zaynab probably had no further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of her family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, however, Zaynab's first husband does not seem to have made a deep impression on her. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. They include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing. It must have been because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, nobody remembered his name. Not only did Zaynab apparently not talk about him very much, but nor did anyone else who had known him: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin ... all are silent of both the good and the bad. Perhaps the marriage did not last very long, or perhaps the man had a forgettable personality.

===Islam===

Zaynab's brother-in-law, Abdulrahman ibn Awf,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115.</ref> and her cousin, Abdullah (later Abu Salama) ibn Abdulasad,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> were among the earliest converts to Islam. Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in the list of "those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr's invitation," but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615. This suggests that Zaynab, in her early twenties at the time, was converted<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. The lists of early converts include all her siblings' spouses but nobody who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. So he probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama also remained a pagan.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was a widow by the time she emigrated to Medina under the protection of her brother Abdullah. This was in late 620 or 621, when she was about 30.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215.</ref>

When the Banu Jahsh made their hijra to Medina, Abu Sufyan sold their houses and appropriated for himself the proceeds of the transaction.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> One of the sons of Jahsh complained of this iniquity, stressing that "others" (ie, other branches of Quraysh - K) wanted to affiliate them as allies, but the Banu Jahsh preferred an alliance with Abu Sufyan.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> 'Abel al-Malik inquired who it was who had offered the Banu Jahsh the alliance and 'Urwa b. al-Zubayr said that his clan had done so, but that Banu Jahsh had preferred to conclude an alliance with Abu Sufyan.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref>

===Second Marriage===

====Zayd's Background====

"The Prophet having witnessed this, took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and paternal uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away. ... Zayd b Harithah was thus called Zayd b Muhammad until God revealed Islam."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

Muhammad encouraged Zayd to marry. Zayd's first wife had been Muhammad's cousin, Durra bint Abi Lahab, whose two brothers were married to Muhammad's two middle daughters. But Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle Abu Lahab about 613, with the result that the three young couples were all divorced. In the meantime, however, Zayd had taken a second wife. This was Baraka, an ex-slave about fifteen years older than himself who had always been plain. She was the mother of his son Usama, born c. 611. For a long time, Baraka was Zayd's only wife, but he married again after his arrival in Medina. His third wife was Humayma bint Sayfi, the widow of a leading man of Medina. At some stage, although the date is uncertain, he also married an Umm Mubashshir, who owned a date-orchard that she tended with her own hands.

So Zayd had at least two wives, and probably three, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Before and after marrying Zayd, Zaynab lived with her brother, apparently happily.
Zaynab and her brother Abdullah did not want her to marry Zayd.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari||3|249}}; {{Bukhari||3|829}}; {{Bukhari||4|6883}}.</ref>

Islam teaches that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref>

Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

Zaynab said she didn’t want to marry Zayd “because I am the widow of the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.</ref> She probably meant that, as an ex-slave, he was not good enough for her aristocratic aspirations. Zayd already had two wives, one of whom had borne him a son, so Zaynab was forced to accept the position of third wife.

Nobody asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife.

“It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error. When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref> "This was revealed regarding Abdullah b Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd b Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out, for they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself. But afterwards they consented because of the verse. Thus the Prophet gave her in marriage to Zayd."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref>

In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned.

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''.|Zaynab bint Jahsh came from one of the noblest families of the Quraysh, and everyone expected her to eventually marry a man with the same high social status. The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered. When the Prophet asked for her hand on behalf of Zayd, Zaynab had her family were shocked at the idea of her marrying a man who in their eyes was only a freed slave. Moreover, Zaynab had wanted to marry the Prophet himself and in fact he had already been asked by her family whether or not he would like to marry her. At first both she and her brother refused, but then [Q33:36] was revealed ... When Zayd, who had also had misgivings about the proposed match, and Zaynab realized that there was no difference between what the Prophet wanted and what Allah wanted, they both agreed to the marriage, the Prophet providing a handsome dowry for Zaynab on Zayd’s behalf. The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607.</ref> This may be the real reason that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd, i.e., Abdullah had been both her material and her psychological protector, and without his support, she gave in to the pressure. However, the exact date of her marriage to Zayd is not recorded.

Zaynab of Jahsh had a brother who died before her.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref> This cannot be Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; but it is unlikely that she made any fuss over Ubaydullah, who had been disowned as an apostate, and whom by the time of his death she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

"But you had hidden in your heart what God was to disclose, He was to manifest of your love for her and of that should Zayd part with her you would marry her, and you feared people, would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’, though God is worthier that you should fear Him, in all things, so take her in marriage and do not be concerned with what people say."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift. She pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab's movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"In this year the Messenger married Zaynab b Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd b Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 1}}.</ref> When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref> Zayd left her, and she became free. While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Ayesha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Ayesha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>

"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: “Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.” But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had dissolved with her, with the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there may be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"Anas reported. Zayd b Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Ayesha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse: ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ [Q33.37] was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd b Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}.</ref>

"Narrated Anas. Zayd bin Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything (of the Quran) he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married (to the Prophet) by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse:-- ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ (33.37) was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd bin Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

"Al-Zamakhshari, on the other hand, treats other aspects in his analysis of the story. [Aisha's hadith as above follows.] Muslim writers have added nothing to the list of apologies that al-Zamakhshari (A.D. 1144) and al-Razi (A.D. 1209) presented, as they use the same arguments trying to interpret this story, and even defend it." '''CITATION MISSING'''.<ref></ref>

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref>

"When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.
"When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So '''he desired her''' and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd '''who then understood''' (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

'''Limit of Four Wives'''. When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

Zaynab entered the household as Mohammed’s fifth concurrent wife, while other Muslims were only allowed four each. Having pledged not to divorce Sawda, Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

'''Incest'''. The Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah sent down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref>

Allah sent another revelation to explain that an adopted son was not a real son and that he approved of Mohammed’s marrying Zaynab.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref> Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

Adoption was permanently abolished from Islam. Adopted children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological children.

“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Reasons for Third Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then announced to Ayesha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” Ayesha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty.”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref>

"The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>
"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmed married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Zayd married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab<ref></ref> and probably much younger.<ref></ref> Muhammad ordered this marriage.<ref></ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr's sister Hind.<ref></ref> Neither marriage lasted very long. Umm Kulthum engineered a divorce from Al-Zubayr, who was violent;<ref></ref> and Zayd had not much longer to live.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref>

There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>

At this time Allah also sent down the revelation that no unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.
When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Omar went to spy on the outdoor toilets and he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.
Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. On the upper end of one of these units a unique room, called a mashruba, was constructed, an upper storey that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:81-82.</ref>
Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.” In another narration it is said that: “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.”

She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182; Tabari 8:3.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref>

Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

When Aisha was accused of adultery, Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”

Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

Aisha afterwards respected Zaynab.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

Muhammad's favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah, in that order.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Islam===

She was fervent in prayer.
"It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.”" IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” Ayesha added, “They use to measure each other’s hands to see whose as longest, and it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

Zaynab was about 42 when Muhammad died.

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died in summer 641, "thus fulfilling the Prophet’s indication that she would be the first of his wives to die after him."

"Zaynab bint Jahsh died when she was 53 years old."<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref>

Umar led her funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmed carried her into her grave. She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.

Aisha wept when she heard the news, saying, “Zaynab was a good woman.” This reaction surprised the community, suggesting that it was widely known that the pair had never been friends.

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

He married Umayma bint Abdulmuttalib, a sister of Muhammad’s father.<ref></ref> Their six children were therefore Muhammad’s first cousins.

Their eldest son, Abd, was born blind. He knew his way around every corner of Mecca.<ref></ref> He was a poet.<ref></ref> He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter, NAME, and had two sons, after which he was always known by his ''kunya'', Abu Ahmad.<ref></ref> The second son was Abdullah.<ref></ref> Their third son, Ubaydullah, was a spiritual seeker. He came under the influence of Zayd ibn Amr and became a monotheist. He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Ramla.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was born c. 590,<ref></ref> so she knew Muhammad all her life. She would have been about five years old when he married Khadijah.<ref></ref> Zaynab had two sisters. Umm Habib married Abdulrahman ibn Awf, a wealthy merchant from the Zuhra clan. Hamna, who appears to have been the youngest of the six siblings,<ref>Hamna’s two husbands were both younger than Zaynab and about the same age as Ubaydullah’s wife. Beyond this clue, the birth-order of the three sisters is not known.</ref> married Musab ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab’s married a respectable man from the Quraysh tribe.<ref></ref> Strangely, nothing else is known about her husband, not even his name. This absence of information is unlikely to indicate that there was anything “embarrassing” about Zaynab’s first marriage. Not very much embarrassed the early Muslim historians; certainly they did not care whether the previous spouses of Muhammad’s wives had been friends, foes or neutral. Rather, it indicates that the chroniclers had no record of this man’s name because nobody ever talked about him. Although he must have been known to the many Umayyads who afterwards passed on traditions about Muhammad, it appears that he was not important to any of them.

We can make three educated guesses about Zaynab’s married life. The first is that her husband was approved by Abu Sufyan. He had allowed, or even arranged, very respectable marriages for all her siblings,<ref></ref> and there is no reason why Zaynab should have been the exception. The man was probably not from the Umayya clan, as in this case Zaynab would have mentioned it,<ref>In {{Tabari|8|p. 1}}, her insistence that her husband had been a Quraysh is clearly meant to emphasise his high social status. She did not assert that he had been from a prestigious clan such as Umayya or Makhzum or Hashim, so presumably he was from one of the humbler families.</ref> but he was nevertheless of some standing in the community.

The second guess is that they had a child. Zaynab was occasionally known as “Umm Al-Hakam,”<ref></ref> literally “Mother of the Judge”. There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of reputation for expertise on matters of law, government or judgment, so it is unlikely to have been a by-name. It is more likely that the name was a ''kunya'' because she had actually given birth to a son named Al-Hakam. Since she certainly had no children from her subsequent marriages,<ref></ref> this must have been her first husband’s child. However, Zaynab’s ''kunya'' was not used very often, and there is no further mention of the child, so Al-Hakam most likely died in infancy.

The third guess is that they were leather-workers. Zaynab was skilled at crafts. She is variously mentioned as tanning<ref></ref> and crafting leather<ref></ref> and dyeing<ref></ref> and tailoring<ref></ref> textiles. It is also said that she pierced pearls.<ref></ref> Her social rank meant that she did not need to work for her living, and there is no indication that any of her siblings had such skills. This suggests that it was her husband’s family who were the leather-workers and that Zaynab learned the craft from them.

===Islam===

Zaynab was about 20 years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Her brother Abdullah was one of the earliest converts,<ref></ref> and he had soon converted his father and siblings.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s mother was not converted.<ref></ref> As for her husband, if he had been a Muslim, this would surely have been noted on the lists of early converts; since the lists do not include anyone who could have been plausibly married to Zaynab, we can assume that he remained a pagan.<ref>It is specifically noted that the early Muslims Sakhran ibn Amr, Abdullah ibn Abdulasad and Ubaydullah ibn Jahsh were married to women who later married Muhammad. There is no such notice regarding Zaynab.</ref>

In 615 Zaynab’s father and brothers joined the emigration to Abyssinia. Abu Ahmad and Ubaydullah took their wives and children with them, but Abdullah and his father travelled alone.<ref></ref> As Umayma was not a Muslim and as she was under the protection of both Abu Sufyan and her brother Abu Talib, she had no reason to fear the Meccans. But the fact that she did not accompany her husband indicates something else: that her relationship with him was strained to the point that they no longer desired one another’s society. As it happened, Jahsh ibn Riyab never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Abu Ahmad and Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619,<ref></ref> but Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia.

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. By this time Zaynab was a widow, although there is no information about how or when her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref>

Although it was a large party of over twenty people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref></ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house.<ref></ref> Abdullah was angry about this.<ref></ref> Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but it is quite likely that he had some sort of legal right over the property, probably because he had originally lent, leased or given it to the Jahshites. By allying so openly with Muhammad, Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection, so few Meccans would have disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally.

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with Abdullah, who also had a wife named Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh and a young son named Muhammad.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173</ref>

Muhammad arrived in September 622.<ref></ref> He built the mosque;<ref></ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref></ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, an enterprise in which Abdullah was quite active.<ref></ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref></ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and she assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother assumed that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. He did not want to marry Zaynab. He was proposing that she marry his adopted son Zayd. Further, it was about this time that he married both Hafsa bint Umar and Zaynab bint Khuzayma. It was also at this time that he ruled that four wives was the maximum number. Zaynab could not have been more thoroughly rejected.

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. They came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad manumitted Zayd and adopted him as his son, and Zayd’s biological family departed in the knowledge that he was happy.

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “a short, flat-nosed man, of a very dark brown skin” and “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until c. 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> The description of her “fine black hair” seems to have been invented by an imaginative Orientalist,<ref></ref> but it is not implausible.

Zaynab declined “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> Abdullah confirmed that Zayd – a black man and a former slave – was simply not good enough for Zaynab’s aristocratic ambitions.<ref>Q33:36; Tabari 39: 6-10, 180; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''.</ref> While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab or Abdullah that they would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that Zaynab had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, her reason was nobody else’s business.

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>Bukhari 62:67; 86:98.</ref>

Muhammad announced a revelation from Allah: “When Allah and His Messenger have decided a matter, it is not fitting for a Believer to decide on any alternatives; anyone who disobeys Allah and His Messenger is certainly on a very wrong Path.”<ref>Q33:36.</ref>

It was at about this time that Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> This might have been the real reason that Zaynab eventually became persuadable. A few days later, she received a visit from Hind’s daughter Zaynab, who would have been about nine years old.<ref>The hadith does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned.</ref>

It is not surprising that Zaynab was on visiting terms with Hind and her daughter, for Zaynab’s aunt had been Hind’s stepmother;<ref></ref> they would have been acquainted all their lives, even before they both counted among the earliest converts to Islam.

The prohibition on displays of grief must have been hard for bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The death of Abdullah was significant for Zaynab because she lost her chief protector.

Zaynab submitted to the spiritual blackmail and married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; ‘‘Tafsir Al-Jalalayn’’.</ref>

All was quiet for a couple of years.

===Third Marriage===

====Reasons for the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>Majlisi, in ''Hayat al-Qulub'', states that she was in the bath. This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources. Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit anyway. Muhammad was too stunned by Zaynab’s enticing movements to stir from the spot, but he gasped out, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

Some apologists claim this story cannot be true because Muhammad had known Zaynab all her life and had seen her face thousands of times without being attracted to her.<ref></ref> These people have missed the point. It was not Zaynab’s ''face'' that attracted Muhammad. His feelings for her changed the first time he saw her ''below the neck''.

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref> but his secret desire for his daughter-in-law found its way into the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Aisha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>

Zaynab realised that she had a chance of escaping her unhappy marriage and decided to help matters along. She became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making cutting remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>Tabari 8:2; Qurtubi on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd realised he would never have a happy life with this resentful woman. He gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad compensated Zayd by finding him new wives. He married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba in 628 at Muhammad’s order.<ref></ref> She bore him two children, probably twins, but this marriage also ended in divorce.<ref></ref> Zayd then married Khadijah’s niece, Hind bint Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> while Umm Kulthum married Hind’s brother Al-Zubayr. Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

====Marriage to Muhammad====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted to his disciples that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, he made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep.<ref>Abu Dawud 12:2233; Tirmizi 945.</ref> Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref> Muslims have not adopted children since that day.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then happily announced to Aisha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” While Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsa<ref></ref> – in that order<ref></ref> – and that his least-favourite was Sawda. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

====The Wedding====

Muhammad married Zaynab on 26 March 627 when he was 56 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref> Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah had to send down a special revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> Allah commanded that there must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” In agonies of embarrassment, Sawda ran to complain to Muhammad, who immediately produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

It is said that he built her an attic to serve as her workroom. Her house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182.</ref> Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref>

Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

===Widowhood===

During his final illness, Muhammad had told his wives that “my wife with the longest hand” would be the first to die after him. The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawda’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawda was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawda was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again.<ref></ref>

She died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81</ref>

Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that the “longest hand” must have been a metaphor and that it probably referred to Zaynab’s generous almsgiving.<ref></ref>

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-22T03:36:55Z

1234567:

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to Mecca and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza'a. Khadijah's grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded, “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that the Asad were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab's children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists some of Riyab's clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>

Riyab's son Jahsh married Umama bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their children were his first cousins. They had six children, although the birth-order of the daughters is not certain.

# Abd, the first of the sons, was born blind. "He could find his way around Mecca without a guide." He was a poet. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter and in later life he was always known by his ''kunya'' Abu Ahmad.
# Abdullah was the second son. He married Zaynab b Khuzayma (who later married Muhammad). He also married Fatima b Abi Hubaysh, by whom he had one son. He died at Uhud on 22 March 625.
# Zaynab was born c. 590.
# Ubaydullah ("little Abdullah") was the third son. He was a spiritual seeker. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older. He died in Abyssinia in late 627.
# Habibah (also known as Umm Habib) married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.
# Hamnah was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, who died at Uhud in March 625. She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.

The birth-order of the daughters is not known.
It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Her words, "I am a widow," spoken in 624 or 625, do not even prove ''how many'' husbands she had had. While it is parsimonious to assume that it was only one, we note here that it is in theory possible that Zaynab was married more than once in Mecca.</ref> He appears to have been a Quraysh of respectable status. He was probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab's statement that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was deliberately asserted to emphasise his social rank; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca.

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. First, she was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). "Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: "her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means "Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. Zaynab probably had no further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of her family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, however, Zaynab's first husband does not seem to have made a deep impression on her. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. They include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing. It must have been because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, nobody remembered his name. Not only did Zaynab apparently not talk about him very much, but nor did anyone else who had known him: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin ... all are silent of both the good and the bad. Perhaps the marriage did not last very long, or perhaps the man had a forgettable personality.

===Islam===

Zaynab's brother-in-law, Abdulrahman ibn Awf,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115.</ref> and her cousin, Abdullah (later Abu Salama) ibn Abdulasad,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> were among the earliest converts to Islam. Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in the list of "those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr's invitation," but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615. This suggests that Zaynab, in her early twenties at the time, was converted<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. The lists of early converts include all her siblings' spouses but nobody who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. So he probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama also remained a pagan.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was a widow by the time she emigrated to Medina under the protection of her brother Abdullah. This was in late 620 or 621, when she was about 30.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215.</ref>

When the Banu Jahsh made their hijra to Medina, Abu Sufyan sold their houses and appropriated for himself the proceeds of the transaction.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> One of the sons of Jahsh complained of this iniquity, stressing that "others" (ie, other branches of Quraysh - K) wanted to affiliate them as allies, but the Banu Jahsh preferred an alliance with Abu Sufyan.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> 'Abel al-Malik inquired who it was who had offered the Banu Jahsh the alliance and 'Urwa b. al-Zubayr said that his clan had done so, but that Banu Jahsh had preferred to conclude an alliance with Abu Sufyan.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref>

===Second Marriage===

====Zayd's Background====

"The Prophet having witnessed this, took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and paternal uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away. ... Zayd b Harithah was thus called Zayd b Muhammad until God revealed Islam."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

Muhammad encouraged Zayd to marry. Zayd's first wife had been Muhammad's cousin, Durra bint Abi Lahab, whose two brothers were married to Muhammad's two middle daughters. But Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle Abu Lahab about 613, with the result that the three young couples were all divorced. In the meantime, however, Zayd had taken a second wife. This was Baraka, an ex-slave about fifteen years older than himself who had always been plain. She was the mother of his son Usama, born c. 611. For a long time, Baraka was Zayd's only wife, but he married again after his arrival in Medina. His third wife was Humayma bint Sayfi, the widow of a leading man of Medina. At some stage, although the date is uncertain, he also married an Umm Mubashshir, who owned a date-orchard that she tended with her own hands.

So Zayd had at least two wives, and probably three, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Before and after marrying Zayd, Zaynab lived with her brother, apparently happily.
Zaynab and her brother Abdullah did not want her to marry Zayd.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari||3|249}}; {{Bukhari||3|829}}; {{Bukhari||4|6883}}.</ref>

Islam teaches that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref>

Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

Zaynab said she didn’t want to marry Zayd “because I am the widow of the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.</ref> She probably meant that, as an ex-slave, he was not good enough for her aristocratic aspirations. Zayd already had two wives, one of whom had borne him a son, so Zaynab was forced to accept the position of third wife.

Nobody asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife.

“It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error. When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref> "This was revealed regarding Abdullah b Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd b Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out, for they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself. But afterwards they consented because of the verse. Thus the Prophet gave her in marriage to Zayd."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref>

In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned.

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''.|Zaynab bint Jahsh came from one of the noblest families of the Quraysh, and everyone expected her to eventually marry a man with the same high social status. The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered. When the Prophet asked for her hand on behalf of Zayd, Zaynab had her family were shocked at the idea of her marrying a man who in their eyes was only a freed slave. Moreover, Zaynab had wanted to marry the Prophet himself and in fact he had already been asked by her family whether or not he would like to marry her. At first both she and her brother refused, but then [Q33:36] was revealed ... When Zayd, who had also had misgivings about the proposed match, and Zaynab realized that there was no difference between what the Prophet wanted and what Allah wanted, they both agreed to the marriage, the Prophet providing a handsome dowry for Zaynab on Zayd’s behalf. The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607.</ref> This may be the real reason that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd, i.e., Abdullah had been both her material and her psychological protector, and without his support, she gave in to the pressure. However, the exact date of her marriage to Zayd is not recorded.

Zaynab of Jahsh had a brother who died before her.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref> This cannot be Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; but it is unlikely that she made any fuss over Ubaydullah, who had been disowned as an apostate, and whom by the time of his death she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

"But you had hidden in your heart what God was to disclose, He was to manifest of your love for her and of that should Zayd part with her you would marry her, and you feared people, would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’, though God is worthier that you should fear Him, in all things, so take her in marriage and do not be concerned with what people say."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift. She pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab's movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"In this year the Messenger married Zaynab b Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd b Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 1}}.</ref> When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref> Zayd left her, and she became free. While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Ayesha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Ayesha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>

"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: “Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.” But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had dissolved with her, with the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there may be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"Anas reported. Zayd b Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Ayesha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse: ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ [Q33.37] was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd b Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}.</ref>

"Narrated Anas. Zayd bin Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything (of the Quran) he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married (to the Prophet) by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse:-- ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ (33.37) was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd bin Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

"Al-Zamakhshari, on the other hand, treats other aspects in his analysis of the story. [Aisha's hadith as above follows.] Muslim writers have added nothing to the list of apologies that al-Zamakhshari (A.D. 1144) and al-Razi (A.D. 1209) presented, as they use the same arguments trying to interpret this story, and even defend it." '''CITATION MISSING'''.<ref></ref>

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref>

"When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.
"When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So '''he desired her''' and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd '''who then understood''' (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

'''Limit of Four Wives'''. When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

Zaynab entered the household as Mohammed’s fifth concurrent wife, while other Muslims were only allowed four each. Having pledged not to divorce Sawda, Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

'''Incest'''. The Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah sent down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref>

Allah sent another revelation to explain that an adopted son was not a real son and that he approved of Mohammed’s marrying Zaynab.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref> Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

Adoption was permanently abolished from Islam. Adopted children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological children.

“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Reasons for Third Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then announced to Ayesha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” Ayesha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty.”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref>

"The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>
"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmed married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Zayd married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab<ref></ref> and probably much younger.<ref></ref> Muhammad ordered this marriage.<ref></ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr's sister Hind.<ref></ref> Neither marriage lasted very long. Umm Kulthum engineered a divorce from Al-Zubayr, who was violent;<ref></ref> and Zayd had not much longer to live.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref>

There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>

At this time Allah also sent down the revelation that no unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.
When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Omar went to spy on the outdoor toilets and he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.
Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. On the upper end of one of these units a unique room, called a mashruba, was constructed, an upper storey that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:81-82.</ref>
Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.” In another narration it is said that: “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.”

She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182; Tabari 8:3.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref>

Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

When Aisha was accused of adultery, Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”

Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

Aisha afterwards respected Zaynab.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

Muhammad's favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah, in that order.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Islam===

She was fervent in prayer.
"It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.”" IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” Ayesha added, “They use to measure each other’s hands to see whose as longest, and it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

Zaynab was about 42 when Muhammad died.

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died in summer 641, "thus fulfilling the Prophet’s indication that she would be the first of his wives to die after him."

"Zaynab bint Jahsh died when she was 53 years old."<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref>

Umar led her funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmed carried her into her grave. She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.

Aisha wept when she heard the news, saying, “Zaynab was a good woman.” This reaction surprised the community, suggesting that it was widely known that the pair had never been friends.

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

He married Umayma bint Abdulmuttalib, a sister of Muhammad’s father.<ref></ref> Their six children were therefore Muhammad’s first cousins.

Their eldest son, Abd, was born blind. He knew his way around every corner of Mecca.<ref></ref> He was a poet.<ref></ref> He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter, NAME, and had two sons, after which he was always known by his ''kunya'', Abu Ahmad.<ref></ref> The second son was Abdullah.<ref></ref> Their third son, Ubaydullah, was a spiritual seeker. He came under the influence of Zayd ibn Amr and became a monotheist. He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Ramla.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was born c. 590,<ref></ref> so she knew Muhammad all her life. She would have been about five years old when he married Khadijah.<ref></ref> Zaynab had two sisters. Umm Habib married Abdulrahman ibn Awf, a wealthy merchant from the Zuhra clan. Hamna, who appears to have been the youngest of the six siblings,<ref>Hamna’s two husbands were both younger than Zaynab and about the same age as Ubaydullah’s wife. Beyond this clue, the birth-order of the three sisters is not known.</ref> married Musab ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab’s married a respectable man from the Quraysh tribe.<ref></ref> Strangely, nothing else is known about her husband, not even his name. This absence of information is unlikely to indicate that there was anything “embarrassing” about Zaynab’s first marriage. Not very much embarrassed the early Muslim historians; certainly they did not care whether the previous spouses of Muhammad’s wives had been friends, foes or neutral. Rather, it indicates that the chroniclers had no record of this man’s name because nobody ever talked about him. Although he must have been known to the many Umayyads who afterwards passed on traditions about Muhammad, it appears that he was not important to any of them.

We can make three educated guesses about Zaynab’s married life. The first is that her husband was approved by Abu Sufyan. He had allowed, or even arranged, very respectable marriages for all her siblings,<ref></ref> and there is no reason why Zaynab should have been the exception. The man was probably not from the Umayya clan, as in this case Zaynab would have mentioned it,<ref>In {{Tabari|8|p. 1}}, her insistence that her husband had been a Quraysh is clearly meant to emphasise his high social status. She did not assert that he had been from a prestigious clan such as Umayya or Makhzum or Hashim, so presumably he was from one of the humbler families.</ref> but he was nevertheless of some standing in the community.

The second guess is that they had a child. Zaynab was occasionally known as “Umm Al-Hakam,”<ref></ref> literally “Mother of the Judge”. There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of reputation for expertise on matters of law, government or judgment, so it is unlikely to have been a by-name. It is more likely that the name was a ''kunya'' because she had actually given birth to a son named Al-Hakam. Since she certainly had no children from her subsequent marriages,<ref></ref> this must have been her first husband’s child. However, Zaynab’s ''kunya'' was not used very often, and there is no further mention of the child, so Al-Hakam most likely died in infancy.

The third guess is that they were leather-workers. Zaynab was skilled at crafts. She is variously mentioned as tanning<ref></ref> and crafting leather<ref></ref> and dyeing<ref></ref> and tailoring<ref></ref> textiles. It is also said that she pierced pearls.<ref></ref> Her social rank meant that she did not need to work for her living, and there is no indication that any of her siblings had such skills. This suggests that it was her husband’s family who were the leather-workers and that Zaynab learned the craft from them.

===Islam===

Zaynab was about 20 years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Her brother Abdullah was one of the earliest converts,<ref></ref> and he had soon converted his father and siblings.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s mother was not converted.<ref></ref> As for her husband, if he had been a Muslim, this would surely have been noted on the lists of early converts; since the lists do not include anyone who could have been plausibly married to Zaynab, we can assume that he remained a pagan.<ref>It is specifically noted that the early Muslims Sakhran ibn Amr, Abdullah ibn Abdulasad and Ubaydullah ibn Jahsh were married to women who later married Muhammad. There is no such notice regarding Zaynab.</ref>

In 615 Zaynab’s father and brothers joined the emigration to Abyssinia. Abu Ahmad and Ubaydullah took their wives and children with them, but Abdullah and his father travelled alone.<ref></ref> As Umayma was not a Muslim and as she was under the protection of both Abu Sufyan and her brother Abu Talib, she had no reason to fear the Meccans. But the fact that she did not accompany her husband indicates something else: that her relationship with him was strained to the point that they no longer desired one another’s society. As it happened, Jahsh ibn Riyab never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>

Abu Ahmad and Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619,<ref></ref> but Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia.

From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. By this time Zaynab was a widow, although there is no information about how or when her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref>

Although it was a large party of over twenty people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref></ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house.<ref></ref> Abdullah was angry about this.<ref></ref> Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but it is quite likely that he had some sort of legal right over the property, probably because he had originally lent, leased or given it to the Jahshites. By allying so openly with Muhammad, Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection, so few Meccans would have disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally.

The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with Abdullah, who also had a wife named Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh and a young son named Muhammad.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173</ref>

Muhammad arrived in September 622.<ref></ref> He built the mosque;<ref></ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref></ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, an enterprise in which Abdullah was quite active.<ref></ref>

===Second Marriage===

At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref></ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and she assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother assumed that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.

They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. He did not want to marry Zaynab. He was proposing that she marry his adopted son Zayd. Further, it was about this time that he married both Hafsa bint Umar and Zaynab bint Khuzayma. It was also at this time that he ruled that four wives was the maximum number. Zaynab could not have been more thoroughly rejected.

====Zayd’s Background====

Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. They came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad manumitted Zayd and adopted him as his son, and Zayd’s biological family departed in the knowledge that he was happy.

In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “a short, flat-nosed man, of a very dark brown skin” and “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.

Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until c. 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>

In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.

Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>

====Reasons for the Marriage====

Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> The description of her “fine black hair” seems to have been invented by an imaginative Orientalist,<ref></ref> but it is not implausible.

Zaynab declined “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> Abdullah confirmed that Zayd – a black man and a former slave – was simply not good enough for Zaynab’s aristocratic ambitions.<ref>Q33:36; Tabari 39: 6-10, 180; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''.</ref> While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab or Abdullah that they would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that Zaynab had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, her reason was nobody else’s business.

The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>Bukhari 62:67; 86:98.</ref>

Muhammad announced a revelation from Allah: “When Allah and His Messenger have decided a matter, it is not fitting for a Believer to decide on any alternatives; anyone who disobeys Allah and His Messenger is certainly on a very wrong Path.”<ref>Q33:36.</ref>

It was at about this time that Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> This might have been the real reason that Zaynab eventually became persuadable. A few days later, she received a visit from Hind’s daughter Zaynab, who would have been about nine years old.<ref>The hadith does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned.</ref>

It is not surprising that Zaynab was on visiting terms with Hind and her daughter, for Zaynab’s aunt had been Hind’s stepmother;<ref></ref> they would have been acquainted all their lives, even before they both counted among the earliest converts to Islam.

The prohibition on displays of grief must have been hard for bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The death of Abdullah was significant for Zaynab because she lost her chief protector.

Zaynab submitted to the spiritual blackmail and married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; ‘‘Tafsir Al-Jalalayn’’.</ref>

All was quiet for a couple of years.

===Third Marriage===

====Reasons for the Divorce====

Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>Majlisi, in ''Hayat al-Qulub'', states that she was in the bath. This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources. Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit anyway. Muhammad was too stunned by Zaynab’s enticing movements to stir from the spot, but he gasped out, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.

Some apologists claim this story cannot be true because Muhammad had known Zaynab all her life and had seen her face thousands of times without being attracted to her.<ref></ref> These people have missed the point. It was not Zaynab’s ''face'' that attracted Muhammad. His feelings for her changed the first time he saw her ''below the neck''.

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref> but his secret desire for his daughter-in-law found its way into the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Aisha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>

Zaynab realised that she had a chance of escaping her unhappy marriage and decided to help matters along. She became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making cutting remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>Tabari 8:2; Qurtubi on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd realised he would never have a happy life with this resentful woman. He gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Muhammad compensated Zayd by finding him new wives. He married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba in 628 at Muhammad’s order.<ref></ref> She bore him two children, probably twins, but this marriage also ended in divorce.<ref></ref> Zayd then married Khadijah’s niece, Hind bint Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> while Umm Kulthum married Hind’s brother Al-Zubayr. Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.

====Marriage to Muhammad====

There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted to his disciples that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, he made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep.<ref>Abu Dawud 12:2233; Tirmizi 945.</ref> Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref> Muslims have not adopted children since that day.

On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then happily announced to Aisha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” While Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

===Tetragyny Ends===

Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.

As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsa<ref></ref> – in that order<ref></ref> – and that his least-favourite was Sawda. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>

====The Wedding====

Muhammad married Zaynab on 26 March 627 when he was 56 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref> Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah had to send down a special revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> Allah commanded that there must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>

Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” In agonies of embarrassment, Sawda ran to complain to Muhammad, who immediately produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

It is said that he built her an attic to serve as her workroom. Her house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks.

Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182.</ref> Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref>

Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.

Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref>

This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

===Widowhood===

During his final illness, Muhammad had told his wives that “my wife with the longest hand” would be the first to die after him. The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawda’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawda was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawda was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.

She never left Medina again.<ref></ref>

She died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81</ref>

Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref>

Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that the “longest hand” must have been a metaphor and that it probably referred to Zaynab’s generous almsgiving.<ref></ref>

User talk:1234567

2013-06-21T12:36:11Z

1234567: /* Article comments */

User talk:1234567

2013-06-21T11:42:32Z

1234567: /* Article comments */

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-21T04:33:02Z

1234567: /* Subsequent Career of Zayd */

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari||8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Her father was Jahsh ibn Riyab of the Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe. The Asad ibn Khuzayma were a Bedouin tribe from eastern Arabia.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> Jahsh's father Riyab immigrated to Mecca in search of the settled lifestyle and requested an alliance with the Quraysh. The Asad clan offered him an alliance "and he gladly joined them as ''hali''." Later it was said that the Asad were "a wretched branch of the Quraysh". Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya. The Umayyads were the most powerful clan in Mecca. Kister.<ref></ref> Zaynab was regarded as an honorary Umayyad.

Her mother was Umama bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim, who was Muhammad’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> so Muhammad had known her all her life.

Zaynab was born c. 590 in Mecca.

She had five siblings.

Abu Ahmed, the eldest, was a blind poet. "He could find his way around Mecca without a guide." He married Abu Sufyan's daughter.

Abdullah was the second brother. He married Zaynab b Khuzayma (who later married Mohammed). He also married Fatima b Abi XXXXX, by whom he had one son. He died at Uhud on 22 March 625.

Ubaydullah ("little Abdullah") was the third brother. He was a spiritual seeker. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older.

The birth-order of the daughters is not known.

Habibah (also known as Umm Habib) married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.

Hamnah was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, who died at Uhud in March 625. She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Her words, "I am a widow," spoken in 624 or 625, do not even prove ''how many'' husbands she had had. While it is parsimonious to assume that it was only one, we note here that it is in theory possible that Zaynab was married more than once in Mecca.</ref> He appears to have been a Quraysh of respectable status. He was probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab's statement that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was deliberately asserted to emphasise his social rank; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca.

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. First, she was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). "Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: "her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means "Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. Zaynab probably had no further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of her family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, however, Zaynab's first husband does not seem to have made a deep impression on her. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. They include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing. It must have been because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, nobody remembered his name. Not only did Zaynab apparently not talk about him very much, but nor did anyone else who had known him: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin ... all are silent of both the good and the bad. Perhaps the marriage did not last very long, or perhaps the man had a forgettable personality.

===Islam===

Zaynab's brother-in-law, Abdulrahman ibn Awf,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115.</ref> and her cousin, Abdullah (later Abu Salama) ibn Abdulasad,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> were among the earliest converts to Islam. Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in the list of "those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr's invitation," but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615. This suggests that Zaynab, in her early twenties at the time, was converted<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. The lists of early converts include all her siblings' spouses but nobody who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. So he probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama also remained a pagan.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was a widow by the time she emigrated to Medina under the protection of her brother Abdullah. This was in late 620 or 621, when she was about 30.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215.</ref>

===Second Marriage===

====Zayd's Background====

"The Prophet having witnessed this, took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and paternal uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away. ... Zayd b Harithah was thus called Zayd b Muhammad until God revealed Islam."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

Muhammad encouraged Zayd to marry. Zayd's first wife had been Muhammad's cousin, Durra bint Abi Lahab, whose two brothers were married to Muhammad's two middle daughters. But Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle Abu Lahab about 613, with the result that the three young couples were all divorced. In the meantime, however, Zayd had taken a second wife. This was Baraka, an ex-slave about fifteen years older than himself who had always been plain. She was the mother of his son Usama, born c. 611. For a long time, Baraka was Zayd's only wife, but he married again after his arrival in Medina. His third wife was Humayma bint Sayfi, the widow of a leading man of Medina. At some stage, although the date is uncertain, he also married an Umm Mubashshir, who owned a date-orchard that she tended with her own hands.

So Zayd had at least two wives, and probably three, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Before and after marrying Zayd, Zaynab lived with her brother, apparently happily.
Zaynab and her brother Abdullah did not want her to marry Zayd.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari||3|249}}; {{Bukhari||3|829}}; {{Bukhari||4|6883}}.</ref>

Islam teaches that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref>

Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

Zaynab said she didn’t want to marry Zayd “because I am the widow of the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.</ref> She probably meant that, as an ex-slave, he was not good enough for her aristocratic aspirations. Zayd already had two wives, one of whom had borne him a son, so Zaynab was forced to accept the position of third wife.

Nobody asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife.

“It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error. When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref> "This was revealed regarding Abdullah b Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd b Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out, for they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself. But afterwards they consented because of the verse. Thus the Prophet gave her in marriage to Zayd."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref>

In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned.

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''.|Zaynab bint Jahsh came from one of the noblest families of the Quraysh, and everyone expected her to eventually marry a man with the same high social status. The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered. When the Prophet asked for her hand on behalf of Zayd, Zaynab had her family were shocked at the idea of her marrying a man who in their eyes was only a freed slave. Moreover, Zaynab had wanted to marry the Prophet himself and in fact he had already been asked by her family whether or not he would like to marry her. At first both she and her brother refused, but then [Q33:36] was revealed ... When Zayd, who had also had misgivings about the proposed match, and Zaynab realized that there was no difference between what the Prophet wanted and what Allah wanted, they both agreed to the marriage, the Prophet providing a handsome dowry for Zaynab on Zayd’s behalf. The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607.</ref> This may be the real reason that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd, i.e., Abdullah had been both her material and her psychological protector, and without his support, she gave in to the pressure. However, the exact date of her marriage to Zayd is not recorded.

Zaynab of Jahsh had a brother who died before her.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref> This cannot be Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; but it is unlikely that she made any fuss over Ubaydullah, who had been disowned as an apostate, and whom by the time of his death she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

"But you had hidden in your heart what God was to disclose, He was to manifest of your love for her and of that should Zayd part with her you would marry her, and you feared people, would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’, though God is worthier that you should fear Him, in all things, so take her in marriage and do not be concerned with what people say."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift. She pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab's movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"In this year the Messenger married Zaynab b Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd b Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 1}}.</ref> When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref> Zayd left her, and she became free. While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Ayesha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Ayesha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>

"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: “Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.” But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had dissolved with her, with the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there may be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"Anas reported. Zayd b Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Ayesha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse: ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ [Q33.37] was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd b Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}.</ref>

"Narrated Anas. Zayd bin Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything (of the Quran) he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married (to the Prophet) by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse:-- ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ (33.37) was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd bin Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

"Al-Zamakhshari, on the other hand, treats other aspects in his analysis of the story. [Aisha's hadith as above follows.] Muslim writers have added nothing to the list of apologies that al-Zamakhshari (A.D. 1144) and al-Razi (A.D. 1209) presented, as they use the same arguments trying to interpret this story, and even defend it." '''CITATION MISSING'''.<ref></ref>

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref>

"When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.
"When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So '''he desired her''' and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd '''who then understood''' (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

'''Limit of Four Wives'''. When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

Zaynab entered the household as Mohammed’s fifth concurrent wife, while other Muslims were only allowed four each. Having pledged not to divorce Sawda, Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

'''Incest'''. The Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah sent down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref>

Allah sent another revelation to explain that an adopted son was not a real son and that he approved of Mohammed’s marrying Zaynab.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref> Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

Adoption was permanently abolished from Islam. Adopted children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological children.

“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Reasons for Third Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then announced to Ayesha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” Ayesha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty.”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref>

"The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>
"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmed married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Zayd married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab<ref></ref> and probably much younger.<ref></ref> Muhammad ordered this marriage.<ref></ref> She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya.<ref></ref> Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known.<ref></ref> The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.<ref></ref>

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> and Zayd married Al-Zubayr's sister Hind.<ref></ref> Neither marriage lasted very long. Umm Kulthum engineered a divorce from Al-Zubayr, who was violent;<ref></ref> and Zayd had not much longer to live.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.<ref></ref>

===The Order of the Veil===

When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref>

There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>

At this time Allah also sent down the revelation that no unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.
When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Omar went to spy on the outdoor toilets and he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.
Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. On the upper end of one of these units a unique room, called a mashruba, was constructed, an upper storey that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:81-82.</ref>
Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.” In another narration it is said that: “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.”

She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182; Tabari 8:3.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref>

Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

When Aisha was accused of adultery, Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”

Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

Aisha afterwards respected Zaynab.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

Muhammad's favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah, in that order.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Islam===

She was fervent in prayer.
"It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.”" IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” Ayesha added, “They use to measure each other’s hands to see whose as longest, and it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

Zaynab was about 42 when Muhammad died.

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died in summer 641, "thus fulfilling the Prophet’s indication that she would be the first of his wives to die after him."

"Zaynab bint Jahsh died when she was 53 years old."<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref>

Umar led her funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmed carried her into her grave. She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.

Aisha wept when she heard the news, saying, “Zaynab was a good woman.” This reaction surprised the community, suggesting that it was widely known that the pair had never been friends.

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-21T04:19:47Z

1234567: /* Subsequent Career of Zayd */

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari||8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Her father was Jahsh ibn Riyab of the Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe. The Asad ibn Khuzayma were a Bedouin tribe from eastern Arabia.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> Jahsh's father Riyab immigrated to Mecca in search of the settled lifestyle and requested an alliance with the Quraysh. The Asad clan offered him an alliance "and he gladly joined them as ''hali''." Later it was said that the Asad were "a wretched branch of the Quraysh". Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya. The Umayyads were the most powerful clan in Mecca. Kister.<ref></ref> Zaynab was regarded as an honorary Umayyad.

Her mother was Umama bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim, who was Muhammad’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> so Muhammad had known her all her life.

Zaynab was born c. 590 in Mecca.

She had five siblings.

Abu Ahmed, the eldest, was a blind poet. "He could find his way around Mecca without a guide." He married Abu Sufyan's daughter.

Abdullah was the second brother. He married Zaynab b Khuzayma (who later married Mohammed). He also married Fatima b Abi XXXXX, by whom he had one son. He died at Uhud on 22 March 625.

Ubaydullah ("little Abdullah") was the third brother. He was a spiritual seeker. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older.

The birth-order of the daughters is not known.

Habibah (also known as Umm Habib) married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.

Hamnah was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, who died at Uhud in March 625. She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Her words, "I am a widow," spoken in 624 or 625, do not even prove ''how many'' husbands she had had. While it is parsimonious to assume that it was only one, we note here that it is in theory possible that Zaynab was married more than once in Mecca.</ref> He appears to have been a Quraysh of respectable status. He was probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab's statement that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was deliberately asserted to emphasise his social rank; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca.

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. First, she was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). "Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: "her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means "Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. Zaynab probably had no further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of her family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, however, Zaynab's first husband does not seem to have made a deep impression on her. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. They include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing. It must have been because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, nobody remembered his name. Not only did Zaynab apparently not talk about him very much, but nor did anyone else who had known him: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin ... all are silent of both the good and the bad. Perhaps the marriage did not last very long, or perhaps the man had a forgettable personality.

===Islam===

Zaynab's brother-in-law, Abdulrahman ibn Awf,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115.</ref> and her cousin, Abdullah (later Abu Salama) ibn Abdulasad,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> were among the earliest converts to Islam. Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in the list of "those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr's invitation," but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615. This suggests that Zaynab, in her early twenties at the time, was converted<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. The lists of early converts include all her siblings' spouses but nobody who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. So he probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama also remained a pagan.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was a widow by the time she emigrated to Medina under the protection of her brother Abdullah. This was in late 620 or 621, when she was about 30.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215.</ref>

===Second Marriage===

====Zayd's Background====

"The Prophet having witnessed this, took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and paternal uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away. ... Zayd b Harithah was thus called Zayd b Muhammad until God revealed Islam."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

Muhammad encouraged Zayd to marry. Zayd's first wife had been Muhammad's cousin, Durra bint Abi Lahab, whose two brothers were married to Muhammad's two middle daughters. But Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle Abu Lahab about 613, with the result that the three young couples were all divorced. In the meantime, however, Zayd had taken a second wife. This was Baraka, an ex-slave about fifteen years older than himself who had always been plain. She was the mother of his son Usama, born c. 611. For a long time, Baraka was Zayd's only wife, but he married again after his arrival in Medina. His third wife was Humayma bint Sayfi, the widow of a leading man of Medina. At some stage, although the date is uncertain, he also married an Umm Mubashshir, who owned a date-orchard that she tended with her own hands.

So Zayd had at least two wives, and probably three, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Before and after marrying Zayd, Zaynab lived with her brother, apparently happily.
Zaynab and her brother Abdullah did not want her to marry Zayd.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari||3|249}}; {{Bukhari||3|829}}; {{Bukhari||4|6883}}.</ref>

Islam teaches that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref>

Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

Zaynab said she didn’t want to marry Zayd “because I am the widow of the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.</ref> She probably meant that, as an ex-slave, he was not good enough for her aristocratic aspirations. Zayd already had two wives, one of whom had borne him a son, so Zaynab was forced to accept the position of third wife.

Nobody asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife.

“It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error. When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref> "This was revealed regarding Abdullah b Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd b Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out, for they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself. But afterwards they consented because of the verse. Thus the Prophet gave her in marriage to Zayd."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref>

In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned.

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''.|Zaynab bint Jahsh came from one of the noblest families of the Quraysh, and everyone expected her to eventually marry a man with the same high social status. The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered. When the Prophet asked for her hand on behalf of Zayd, Zaynab had her family were shocked at the idea of her marrying a man who in their eyes was only a freed slave. Moreover, Zaynab had wanted to marry the Prophet himself and in fact he had already been asked by her family whether or not he would like to marry her. At first both she and her brother refused, but then [Q33:36] was revealed ... When Zayd, who had also had misgivings about the proposed match, and Zaynab realized that there was no difference between what the Prophet wanted and what Allah wanted, they both agreed to the marriage, the Prophet providing a handsome dowry for Zaynab on Zayd’s behalf. The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607.</ref> This may be the real reason that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd, i.e., Abdullah had been both her material and her psychological protector, and without his support, she gave in to the pressure. However, the exact date of her marriage to Zayd is not recorded.

Zaynab of Jahsh had a brother who died before her.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref> This cannot be Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; but it is unlikely that she made any fuss over Ubaydullah, who had been disowned as an apostate, and whom by the time of his death she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

"But you had hidden in your heart what God was to disclose, He was to manifest of your love for her and of that should Zayd part with her you would marry her, and you feared people, would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’, though God is worthier that you should fear Him, in all things, so take her in marriage and do not be concerned with what people say."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift. She pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab's movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"In this year the Messenger married Zaynab b Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd b Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 1}}.</ref> When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref> Zayd left her, and she became free. While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Ayesha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Ayesha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>

"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: “Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.” But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had dissolved with her, with the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there may be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"Anas reported. Zayd b Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Ayesha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse: ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ [Q33.37] was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd b Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}.</ref>

"Narrated Anas. Zayd bin Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything (of the Quran) he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married (to the Prophet) by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse:-- ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ (33.37) was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd bin Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

"Al-Zamakhshari, on the other hand, treats other aspects in his analysis of the story. [Aisha's hadith as above follows.] Muslim writers have added nothing to the list of apologies that al-Zamakhshari (A.D. 1144) and al-Razi (A.D. 1209) presented, as they use the same arguments trying to interpret this story, and even defend it." '''CITATION MISSING'''.<ref></ref>

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref>

"When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.
"When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So '''he desired her''' and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd '''who then understood''' (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

'''Limit of Four Wives'''. When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

Zaynab entered the household as Mohammed’s fifth concurrent wife, while other Muslims were only allowed four each. Having pledged not to divorce Sawda, Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

'''Incest'''. The Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah sent down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref>

Allah sent another revelation to explain that an adopted son was not a real son and that he approved of Mohammed’s marrying Zaynab.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref> Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

Adoption was permanently abolished from Islam. Adopted children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological children.

“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Reasons for Third Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then announced to Ayesha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” Ayesha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty.”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref>

"The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>
"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmed married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Zayd married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and twenty years younger. Muhammad ordered this marriage. She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya. Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. This marriage ended in divorce, though the circumstances are not known. The child Zayd died in infancy, but Ruqayya lived to come under the protection of Caliph Uthman.

Umm Kulthum then married Al-Zubayr ibn Al-Awwam, and Zayd married Al-Zubayr's sister Hind. Neither marriage lasted very long. Umm Kulthum engineered a divorce from Al-Zubayr, who was violent; and Zayd had not much longer to live.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.

===The Order of the Veil===

When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref>

There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>

At this time Allah also sent down the revelation that no unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.
When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Omar went to spy on the outdoor toilets and he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.
Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. On the upper end of one of these units a unique room, called a mashruba, was constructed, an upper storey that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:81-82.</ref>
Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.” In another narration it is said that: “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.”

She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182; Tabari 8:3.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref>

Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

When Aisha was accused of adultery, Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”

Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

Aisha afterwards respected Zaynab.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

Muhammad's favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah, in that order.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Islam===

She was fervent in prayer.
"It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.”" IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” Ayesha added, “They use to measure each other’s hands to see whose as longest, and it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

Zaynab was about 42 when Muhammad died.

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died in summer 641, "thus fulfilling the Prophet’s indication that she would be the first of his wives to die after him."

"Zaynab bint Jahsh died when she was 53 years old."<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref>

Umar led her funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmed carried her into her grave. She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.

Aisha wept when she heard the news, saying, “Zaynab was a good woman.” This reaction surprised the community, suggesting that it was widely known that the pair had never been friends.

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 4

2013-06-21T04:11:51Z

1234567: /* Zayd's Background */

==Zaynab bint Jahsh==

Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari||8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.

===Background===

Her father was Jahsh ibn Riyab of the Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe. The Asad ibn Khuzayma were a Bedouin tribe from eastern Arabia.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> Jahsh's father Riyab immigrated to Mecca in search of the settled lifestyle and requested an alliance with the Quraysh. The Asad clan offered him an alliance "and he gladly joined them as ''hali''." Later it was said that the Asad were "a wretched branch of the Quraysh". Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya. The Umayyads were the most powerful clan in Mecca. Kister.<ref></ref> Zaynab was regarded as an honorary Umayyad.

Her mother was Umama bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim, who was Muhammad’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> so Muhammad had known her all her life.

Zaynab was born c. 590 in Mecca.

She had five siblings.

Abu Ahmed, the eldest, was a blind poet. "He could find his way around Mecca without a guide." He married Abu Sufyan's daughter.

Abdullah was the second brother. He married Zaynab b Khuzayma (who later married Mohammed). He also married Fatima b Abi XXXXX, by whom he had one son. He died at Uhud on 22 March 625.

Ubaydullah ("little Abdullah") was the third brother. He was a spiritual seeker. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older.

The birth-order of the daughters is not known.

Habibah (also known as Umm Habib) married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.

Hamnah was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, who died at Uhud in March 625. She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.

===First Marriage===

Zaynab was married in Mecca, but almost nothing is known about her husband.<ref>Her words, "I am a widow," spoken in 624 or 625, do not even prove ''how many'' husbands she had had. While it is parsimonious to assume that it was only one, we note here that it is in theory possible that Zaynab was married more than once in Mecca.</ref> He appears to have been a Quraysh of respectable status. He was probably not from the leading clans of Umayya, Makhzum or even Hashim, since Zaynab's statement that he was a Quraysh<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}: "I am the widow of the Quraysh."</ref> was deliberately asserted to emphasise his social rank; if he had belonged to these prestigious families, she would certainly have mentioned it. But every Quraysh was deemed of higher social status than every other person in Mecca.

We can take some educated guesses about Zaynab's married life. First, she was occasionally known as ''Umm al-Hakam'',<ref>[http://referenceworks.brillonline.com/entries/encyclopaedia-of-islam-1/zainab-bint-djahsh-SIM_6058/ Vacca, V. (2013). "Zainab bint Djahsh" in ''Encyclopaedia of Islam. First Edition (1913-1936)''. Brill Online, 2013. Retrieved 7 March 2013.]: "her ''kunya'' was Umm al-Hakam and her name had been Barra."</ref> which literally means "Mother of the Judge". There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of legal expertise or even that she was consulted for her general wisdom. It is therefore most likely that ''Umm al-Hakam'' was a literal ''kunya'' and that Zaynab gave birth to an actual child named Al-Hakam. This child is never otherwise mentioned, so he probably died in infancy. Zaynab probably had no further children; she certainly had none who survived and none at all by her subsequent husbands.<ref></ref>

Second, Zaynab became a skilled craftswoman. She knew how to tan leather,<ref></ref> dye cloth,<ref></ref> pierce pearls<ref></ref> and make clothes and other household items from cloth and leather.<ref></ref> There is no indication that any other member of her family had these skills, and she certainly did not grow up with the economic need to learn a trade. So it is reasonable to infer that Zaynab's first husband was from one of Mecca's many leather-working families<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 150-151.</ref> and that she learned her skills from them. Since she continued with this work all her life, whether there was an economic need for it or not,<ref></ref> it is safe to say that she enjoyed it. So the everyday-labour aspect of her first marriage must have been happy.

Thirdly, however, Zaynab's first husband does not seem to have made a deep impression on her. All the previous husbands of Muhammad's other wives are carefully listed in their biographies. They include some men who were Muslim heroes, others who were considered enemies of Islam, and others again who were of no great importance. The historians were very obviously not excluding information that was somehow "embarrassing", so this cannot be the reason why Zaynab's first husband is missing. It must have been because, by the time the ''ahadith'' were committed to writing, nobody remembered his name. Not only did Zaynab apparently not talk about him very much, but nor did anyone else who had known him: her siblings, their numerous Hashimite cousins, their honorary Umayya kin ... all are silent of both the good and the bad. Perhaps the marriage did not last very long, or perhaps the man had a forgettable personality.

===Islam===

Zaynab's brother-in-law, Abdulrahman ibn Awf,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115.</ref> and her cousin, Abdullah (later Abu Salama) ibn Abdulasad,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116</ref> were among the earliest converts to Islam. Her brothers Abu Ahmad and Abdullah came under the influence of Abu Bakr and were converted slightly later, perhaps in 612.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> The other four siblings and their father Riyab are not included in the list of "those who accepted Islam at Abu Bakr's invitation," but they were nevertheless all Muslims by 615. This suggests that Zaynab, in her early twenties at the time, was converted<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> under the influence of her brothers. The lists of early converts include all her siblings' spouses but nobody who could have plausibly been Zaynab's husband. So he probably remained a pagan. Her mother Umama also remained a pagan.<ref></ref>

Zaynab was a widow by the time she emigrated to Medina under the protection of her brother Abdullah. This was in late 620 or 621, when she was about 30.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215.</ref>

===Second Marriage===

====Zayd's Background====

"The Prophet having witnessed this, took Zayd out to the ''Hijr'' and said, “O all those who are present, witness that Zayd becomes my son, with mutual rights of inheritance.” When Zayd’s father and paternal uncle saw this, they were satisfied and went away. ... Zayd b Harithah was thus called Zayd b Muhammad until God revealed Islam."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 9-10}}.</ref>

Muhammad encouraged Zayd to marry. Zayd's first wife had been Muhammad's cousin, Durra bint Abi Lahab, whose two brothers were married to Muhammad's two middle daughters. But Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle Abu Lahab about 613, with the result that the three young couples were all divorced. In the meantime, however, Zayd had taken a second wife. This was Baraka, an ex-slave about fifteen years older than himself who had always been plain. She was the mother of his son Usama, born c. 611. For a long time, Baraka was Zayd's only wife, but he married again after his arrival in Medina. His third wife was Humayma bint Sayfi, the widow of a leading man of Medina. At some stage, although the date is uncertain, he also married an Umm Mubashshir, who owned a date-orchard that she tended with her own hands.

So Zayd had at least two wives, and probably three, when Muhammad decided that he should also marry Zaynab.

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Before and after marrying Zayd, Zaynab lived with her brother, apparently happily.
Zaynab and her brother Abdullah did not want her to marry Zayd.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 6-10, 180}}; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''; {{Muslim|2|2347}}; {{Muslim|2|3330}}; {{Muslim|2|3332}}; {{Muslim|2|3494}}; {{Bukhari||3|249}}; {{Bukhari||3|829}}; {{Bukhari||4|6883}}.</ref>

Islam teaches that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>{{Bukhari||62|67}}; {{Bukhari||86|98}}.</ref>

Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” small,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:77.</ref> fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> However, the imaginative description of her “fine black hair, covering half her body,”<ref>Haykal, M. H. (1933). ''The Life of Muhammad''. Translated by al-Faruqi, I. R. A. (1993), p. 217. Plainfield, U.S.A.: American Trust Publications. Haykal is not ratifying this description but quoting it as an example of the “glowing vindictiveness” of the “Orientalists and missionaries”. However, he does not name the “Orientalist” or cite his source, so it is not clear who first described Zaynab in this manner. For the record, Haykal also refers to an alleged description of how “every curve of her body was full of desire and passion.”</ref> while not implausible, does not seem to be based on early sources.

Zaynab said she didn’t want to marry Zayd “because I am the widow of the Quraysh.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.</ref> She probably meant that, as an ex-slave, he was not good enough for her aristocratic aspirations. Zayd already had two wives, one of whom had borne him a son, so Zaynab was forced to accept the position of third wife.

Nobody asked Baraka or Umm Mubashshir if they wanted Zaynab as a co-wife.

“It is not for any believer, man or woman, when God and His Messenger have decreed a matter, to have the choice in the affair. Whosoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger has gone astray into manifest error. When you said to him whom Allah had blessed and you had favoured, ‘Keep your wife to yourself, and fear Allah,’ and you were concealing within yourself what Allah should reveal, fearing other men; and Allah has better right for you to fear him. So when Zayd had accomplished what he would of her, then We gave her in marriage to you, so that there should not be any fault in the believers, touching the wives of their adopted sons, when they have accomplished what they would of them; and Allah’s commandment must be performed. There is no fault in the prophet, touching what Allah had ordained for him.”<ref>{{Quran-range|33|36-38}}.</ref> "This was revealed regarding Abdullah b Jahsh and his sister Zaynab, whose hand the Prophet had asked for in marriage, but meaning on behalf of Zayd b Haritha. They were loathe to this when they found out, for they had thought that the Prophet wanted to marry her himself. But afterwards they consented because of the verse. Thus the Prophet gave her in marriage to Zayd."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36-38.</ref>

In other words, in the eternally existing uncreated Qur’an in heaven, Zaynab’s duty to marry Zayd was mentioned.

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''.|Zaynab bint Jahsh came from one of the noblest families of the Quraysh, and everyone expected her to eventually marry a man with the same high social status. The Prophet Muhammad had watched both Zayd and Zaynab grow up, and thought they would make a good couple, and that their marriage would demonstrate that it was not who their ancestors were, but rather their standing in the sight of Allah, that mattered. When the Prophet asked for her hand on behalf of Zayd, Zaynab had her family were shocked at the idea of her marrying a man who in their eyes was only a freed slave. Moreover, Zaynab had wanted to marry the Prophet himself and in fact he had already been asked by her family whether or not he would like to marry her. At first both she and her brother refused, but then [Q33:36] was revealed ... When Zayd, who had also had misgivings about the proposed match, and Zaynab realized that there was no difference between what the Prophet wanted and what Allah wanted, they both agreed to the marriage, the Prophet providing a handsome dowry for Zaynab on Zayd’s behalf. The marriage, however, was not a success. Although both Zaynab and Zayd were the best of people, who loved Allah and His Messenger, they were very different and in the end they could not overcome their incompatibility. Zayd asked the Prophet’s permission to divorce Zaynab more than once, and although he was counselled to hold onto his wife and to fear Allah, in the end the divorce took place. The Prophet then was ordered by Allah to marry Zaynab bint Jahsh, while he did in 5 AH, when he was 58 years old, and she was 35 years old. In doing so, he demonstrated beyond doubt that in Islam an adopted son is not regarded in the same light as a natural son, and that although a father may never marry a woman whom his natural son has married and then divorced, the father of an adopted son is permitted to marry a woman who was once, but is no longer, married to that adopted son. Furthermore, by marrying Zaynab, the Prophet also confirmed that it is permissible for cousins to marry, and , at the same time, Zaynab was given her heart’s desire to be married to the Best of Creation.}}

Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud on 22 March 625.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607.</ref> This may be the real reason that Zaynab agreed to marry Zayd, i.e., Abdullah had been both her material and her psychological protector, and without his support, she gave in to the pressure. However, the exact date of her marriage to Zayd is not recorded.

Zaynab of Jahsh had a brother who died before her.<ref>{{Abudawud|2|2292}}.</ref> This cannot be Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; but it is unlikely that she made any fuss over Ubaydullah, who had been disowned as an apostate, and whom by the time of his death she had not seen for twelve years. So it probably refers to the death of Abdullah at Uhud.

====The Wedding====

Zaynab married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

"But you had hidden in your heart what God was to disclose, He was to manifest of your love for her and of that should Zayd part with her you would marry her, and you feared people, would say, ‘He has married his son’s wife!’, though God is worthier that you should fear Him, in all things, so take her in marriage and do not be concerned with what people say."<ref>Al-Jalalayn, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

===Third Marriage===

====Circumstances of the Marriage====

Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift. She pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit. Muhammad stood still, staring at Zaynab's movements, and repeating to himself, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"In this year the Messenger married Zaynab b Jahsh. Allah’s Messenger came to the house of Zayd b Muhammad. Perhaps the Messenger missed him at that moment. Zaynab, Zayd’s wife, rose to meet him. Because she was dressed only in a shift, the Holy Prophet turned away from her. She said: “He is not here. Come in, you are as dear to me as my father and mother!” Muhammad refused to enter. Zaynab had dressed in haste when she heard that the Prophet was at her door. She jumped up eagerly and excited the admiration of Allah’s Messenger, so that he turned away murmuring something that could scarcely be understood. However, he did say overtly, “Glory be to Allah Almighty, who causes hearts to turn!”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 1}}.</ref> When Zayd came home, his wife told him that the Messenger of God had come to his house. Zayd said, “Why didn’t you ask him to come in?” She replied, “I asked him, but he refused.” “Did you hear him say anything?” he asked. She replied, “As he turned away, I heard him say: ‘Glory be to God the Almighty! Glory be to God, who causes hearts to turn!’” So Zayd went to Muhammad. “Prophet, I have heard that you came to my house. Why didn’t you go in? Perhaps Zaynab has excited your admiration, so I will leave her.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref> Zayd left her, and she became free. While the Messenger of Allah was talking with Ayesha, a fainting overcame him. When he was released from it, he smiled and said, “Who will go to Zaynab to tell her the good news? Allah has married her to me.” Then the Holy Prophet recited [Qur’an 33] to the end of the passage. Ayesha said, “I became very uneasy because of what we heard about her beauty and another thing, the loftiest of matters – what Allah had done for her by personally giving her to him in marriage. I said that she would boast of it over us.”<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 3}}.</ref>

His secret desire for his daughter-in-law is mentioned in the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Ayesha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>

"Behold! Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: “Retain thou thy wife, and fear Allah.” But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah. Then when Zayd had dissolved with her, with the necessities, We joined her in marriage to thee: in order that there may be no difficulty to the Believers in marriage with the wives of their adopted sons, when the latter have dissolved with the necessities with them. And Allah’s command must be fulfilled.<ref>{{Quran|33|37}}.</ref>

Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>

"Anas reported. Zayd b Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Ayesha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything [of the Quran] he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse: ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ [Q33.37] was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd b Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari||93|516}}.</ref>

"Narrated Anas. Zayd bin Haritha came to the Prophet complaining about his wife. The Prophet kept on saying (to him), “Be afraid of Allah and keep your wife.” Aisha said, “If Allah’s Apostle were to conceal anything (of the Quran) he would have concealed this Verse.” Zaynab used to boast before the wives of the Prophet and used to say, “You were given in marriage by your families, while I was married (to the Prophet) by Allah from over seven Heavens.” And Thabit recited, “The Verse:-- ‘But (O Muhammad) you did hide in your heart that which Allah was about to make manifest, you did fear the people,’ (33.37) was revealed in connection with Zaynab and Zayd bin Haritha.”<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}.</ref>

"Al-Zamakhshari, on the other hand, treats other aspects in his analysis of the story. [Aisha's hadith as above follows.] Muslim writers have added nothing to the list of apologies that al-Zamakhshari (A.D. 1144) and al-Razi (A.D. 1209) presented, as they use the same arguments trying to interpret this story, and even defend it." '''CITATION MISSING'''.<ref></ref>

Zaynab became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>{{Tabari|8|p. 2}}; Qurtubi's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37-38.</ref>

"When the exalted Allah said, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest: thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah” this was said by Allah as chastisement to His prophet. For when He said, “one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour” this was in reference to Zayd son of Haritha who had been set free by the apostle of Allah – prayers and peace be upon him.
"When the Exalted Allah said, “Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah” this was concerning Zaynab the daughter of Jahsh whom the Prophet had seen in her robes and was enamoured by her. Thus when Allah saw what was stirring in His prophet’s soul, he placed hatred in the heart of Zayd towards Zaynab, that he might depart from her. When Zayd mentioned his intention to separate from Zaynab to the prophet, the prophet told him, “Retain thou thy wife” even though the Prophet desired that they separate so that he could marry her..."<ref>Al-Tabari's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:37.</ref>

{{Quote|Qurtubi’s Commentary|When Allah said, “Thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest,” means that the prophet hid in his heart his desire for Zayd to depart from Zaynab so that he may marry her, and Allah will reveal what you are concealing in your heart concerning this. The Almighty said, “Thou didst fear the people, but it is more fitting that thou shouldst fear Allah,” because Allah was telling the prophet who feared people might say, “He ordered a man to divorce his wife so that he himself may marry her after she is divorced,” and Allah aught to be feared more than people. Narrated by Yunis, narrated by Ibn Wahab, narrated by Ibn Zayd who said, “The prophet had married Zayd son of Haritha to his cousin Zaynab bint Jahsh. One day the prophet went seeking Zayd in his house, whose door had a curtain made of hair. The wind blew the curtain and the prophet '''saw Zaynab in her room unclothed''' and '''he admired her in his heart'''. When Zaynab realized that the prophet desired her '''she began to hate Zayd'''. Zayd then came to the prophet and said, “O apostle of Allah, I wish to separate from my spouse.” The prophet responded, “Why? Has anything evil come from her?” Zayd responded, “No, by Allah! I haven’t seen anything evil from her only good.” The prophet said, “Hold unto your wife and fear Allah.” That is what Allah said in the Quran, “Thou didst say to one who had received the grace of Allah and thy favour: ‘Retain thou (in wedlock) thy wife, and fear Allah.’ But thou didst hide in thy heart that which Allah was about to make manifest.” For the prophet was concealing the fact that '''he would marry Zaynab when Zayd had divorced her'''.}}

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING'''|Muqatil narrated that the prophet married Zaynab daughter of Jahsh to Zayd and she stayed with him for a while. Then one day the prophet came seeking Zayd but he saw Zaynab standing; she was white-skinned with a beautiful figure and one of the most perfect women in Quraysh. So '''he desired her''' and said, “Wondrous is Allah who changes the heart.” When Zaynab heard the prophet’s exaltation of her, she relayed it to Zayd '''who then understood''' (what he had to do). Zayd said to the prophet, “O prophet of Allah, allow me to divorce her, for she has become arrogant; seeing herself superior to me and she insults me with her tongue.” The prophet replied, “Hold onto your wife and fear Allah.” It was said that Allah had sent a wind which lifted the curtain to reveal Zaynab in her room. When the prophet saw her, he desired her, and '''it delighted Zaynab to be desired by the prophet'''. When Zayd returned home, she informed him of what had happened and Zayd was thus determined to divorce her.}}

Zayd divorced Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 181}}.</ref>

{{Quote|CITATION MISSING|Several things point to the lack of truth in this story. First, it is unlikely that the prophet was suddenly struck by Zaynab’s beauty. Zaynab was his cousin. He had known her since childhood. Why would she suddenly appear striking after she was already married to another?

''Perhaps it was because Mohammed had up until that point only seen Zaynab’s face, but in this instance, he saw her uncovered flesh '''below the neck'''?''

Second, the prophet had arranged for her to get married to Zayd. If there was to be an attraction why did the prophet not encourage her to marry none but himself?

''It was presumably because Mohammed had not yet seen Zaynab naked and therefore was not thinking of her in that way. Tabari’s version of the story admits that Mohammed had experienced a '''change of heart'''.''

Third, the fact of the matter was that Zayd’s marriage proved to be an unhappy one.

''This is not in any way relevant to whether or not Mohammed became attracted to Zaynab. He was attracted to her because he saw her undressed, not because her husband was unhappy.''}}

Muslim Apologist Gives Reasons why it was Right for Mohammed to Marry Zaynab<ref>[http://www.islaminfo.com/new/detail.asp?ID=28)/ A Muslim Explanation.]</ref>

{{Quote|Citation Above.|First, the prophet was responsible for arranging Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd. In a sense, then, he was also indirectly responsible for the unhappiness she felt in her marriage.

''A true prophet would have known in advance that Zaynab and Zayd would be unhappy together. In fact, Muhammad did not need to be a prophet to know that the marriage would probably be unhappy. A quite ordinary man is capable of understanding that when a woman says, “I don’t want to marry Zayd,” what she means is, “I don’t want to marry Zayd.” Mohammed certainly was responsible for Zaynab’s unhappiness because he ignored her objections and pressured her into the marriage anyway. But surely the correct response was to apologise and allow her a divorce? Mohammed did not do this. Zayd said three times that he too wanted a divorce, yet Mohammed discouraged divorce and urged him three times to keep his wife. The idea that Zaynab could be “compensated” for one bad marriage by being remarried to the person who had caused the situation was naïve and shallow, to say nothing of conceited.''

Her marriage to the prophet now provided her the honour she felt she deserved...

''The “honour” that Zaynab craved was related to her snobbish disparaging of “low-class” people. This was not a desire that deserved to be indulged.''

... and exonerated the prophet.

''No, it did not exonerate him. He did not consider the feelings of his existing wives. He did not consider that he would now have five wives when other Muslims were only allowed four. His method of relieving Zaynab’s pain was to cause a new pain to a different group of people. And no sooner did he marry Zaynab than he also tried to marry Ghaziya and Rayhana! One wonders if that was truly what Zaynab had had in mind. A real solution to the problem would have been to instruct Zayd to be faithful to Baraka and Umm Mubashshir om now on, to promise his existing wives that he would never add to their number, and to let Zaynab choose herself a new husband from among the many Muslim bachelors.''

The prophet’s marriage to the divorced wife of Zayd was a practical demonstration that the adopted relationship was not equal to a real blood-relationship.

''Even if we allow that Mohammed disliked adoption, a “practical demonstration” was hardly necessary. A simple announcement that “adoption is abolished” would have been sufficient to advise the umma that adoption was abolished.''}}

====Difficulties with the Marriage====

'''Limit of Four Wives'''. When men with more than four wives became Muslims, Muhammad made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep. "Al-Harith b Qays al-Asadi recalled: “I embraced Islam while I had eight wives. So I mentioned it to Mohammed, who said: “Select four of them.”"<ref>{{Abudawud|12|2233}}.</ref> "When Ghaylan b Salama al-Thaqafi and his ten wives all accepted Islam, Mohammed told him to keep four and divorce the rest."<ref>Al-Tirmidhi 945.</ref>

"Kulayni has narrated through correct chains of narrators from Imam Jaafar Sadiq that people asked him about the exegesis of the following verses: “O Prophet! surely We have made lawful to you your wives whom you have given their dowries, and those whom your right hand possesses out of those whom Allah has given to you as prisoners of war, and the daughters of your paternal uncles and the daughters of your paternal aunts, and the daughters of your maternal uncles and the daughters of your maternal aunts who fled with you; and a believing woman if she gave herself to the Prophet, if the Prophet desired to marry her – specially for you, not for the (rest of) believers; We know what We have ordained for them concerning their wives and those whom their right hands possess in order that no blame may attach to you; and Allah is Forgiving, Merciful.”"<ref>MAJLISI.</ref>

Zaynab entered the household as Mohammed’s fifth concurrent wife, while other Muslims were only allowed four each. Having pledged not to divorce Sawda, Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>

'''Incest'''. The Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah sent down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref>

Allah sent another revelation to explain that an adopted son was not a real son and that he approved of Mohammed’s marrying Zaynab.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 134}}.</ref> Later apologists have said that this marriage was necessary to demonstrate that adoption was now abolished. Apparently they assume most Muslims would not believe this if they did not witness a live demonstration. But this was never mentioned at the time as a reason for the marriage.

Adoption was permanently abolished from Islam. Adopted children still have limited inheritance rights under Islam compared with biological children.

“Nor has He made your adopted sons your real sons in fact” was revealed concerning Zayd bin Haritha, the freed servant of the Prophet. The Prophet had adopted him before prophethood, and he was known as Zayd bin Muhammad. Allah wanted to put an end to this naming and attribution ... This is a command which abrogates the state of affairs that existed at the beginning of Islam, when it was permitted to call adopted sons after the man who adopted them. Then Allah commanded that they should be given back the names of their real fathers, and states that this was more fair and just.<ref>Ibn Kathir, ''Tafsir''.</ref>

Muhammad Husain Haikal says, “As to Zaynab bint Jahsh, who has been wrapped up by orientalists and missionaries in an imaginary picture of romance and infatuation, true history judges that [Muhammad’s act with] her was one of the glorious deeds of Muhammad. Being the perfect example of faith, he applied to her the Hadith that says, ‘Man’s faith is not made perfect till he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.’ It is enough to destroy the story that it was he who betrothed her to his adopted son, Zayd.” The scholar Haikal does not fail to add that “we could have spared him all these sayings by saying, ‘Let it be true!’ Why would this detract from the greatness, message, and prophethood of Muhammad? The laws that bind [ordinary] people have no power over the luminaries, so how much more the messengers and prophets! Hasn’t Moses seen a dispute between two men; one was from his sect and the other from the enemy’s sect, so he thrust the enemy and killed, committing an unlawful murder? So Moses broke the law, and was not subject to it. Yet this did not detract from his prophethood or message, and did not diminish his greatness. The way Jesus broke the law [of nature] was even greater than Moses, and thus with Muhammad and the rest of the prophets. For his condition is not bordered by a certain limit of power or desire, he rather went beyond the laws of nature by his birth and life!”

====Reasons for Third Marriage====

'''Divine Mandate'''. On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then announced to Ayesha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” Ayesha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty.”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>

Anas reported. When the ''iddah'' of Zaynab was over, Allah’s Messenger said to Zayd to make a mention to her about him. Zayd went on until he came to her and she was fermenting her flour. He (Zayd) said: As I saw her I felt in my heart an idea of her greatness so much so that I could not see towards her (simply for the fact) that Allah’s Messenger had made a mention of her. So I turned my back towards her, and I turned upon my heels, and said: Zaynab, Allah’s Messenger has sent (me) with a message to you. She said: I do not do anything until I solicit the will of my Lord. So she stood at her place of worship and the (verse of) the Qur’an (pertaining to her marriage) was revealed, and Allah’s Messenger came to her without permission…<ref>{{Muslim|8|3330}}.</ref>

The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>

There was social criticism.<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref>

"The prophet gave to [Zayd] in marriage Zaynab bint Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiyyah, whose mother was Umaymah bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim. Zayd later divorced her, and the Prophet married her. The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, “Muhammad prohibits [marriage] with wives of one’s own son, but he married the wife of his son Zayd.” As a result of this God revealed the following verse: “Muhammad is not the father of any of your men, nay, he is the messenger of God and the seal of the prophets ...”, etc. God also revealed this verse, “Call them by their fathers’ names,” so from that day onward [Zayd] was called Zayd ibn Harithah, and [other] adopted sons were named after their [real] fathers."<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

'''Need to Abolish Adoption'''. "The strangeness of the matter lies in the fact that the scholar Haikal presents Muhammad’s giving Zaynab in marriage to Zayd as a cogent argument to refute the claims of his opponents who hold that the matter was merely romance and infatuation! It is unbelievable that Haikal has no knowledge of the fact that “the heart of the Prophet was deeply moved by her after her marriage with Zayd”(22) which is found in trustworthy Islamic reference books. Al-Sabuni, however, excludes any love affair or romance from this marriage, as he says, “How can a man give a virgin woman to [another] person, and then desire her after she is deflowered?”(23) Al-Sabuni attacks the fraudulent “orientalists” and “missionaries” who claimed that God reproved Muhammad for his hidden desire for Zaynab. Yet, these “slanders” of the orientalist and missionaries have already been listed in Tabaqat Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari’s works, as they have been quoted in the books that were written after them. Ibn Sa`d and al-Tabari were neither the enemies of Islam nor “fraudulent orientalists”. They did not know that Muhammad only married her to cancel and abolish the act of adoption.(24) This argument was not known at all at the time of al-Tabari!"

"We used not to call Zayd bin Haritha the freed slave of Allah’s Apostle except Zayd bin Muhammad till the Qur’anic Verse was revealed: “Call them by their fathers. That is more than just in the Sight of Allah.” (Q33:5)"<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|305}}.</ref>

'''Need to Save Zaynab's Reputation'''.

'''Need to Recompense Zaynab'''.

'''Passion'''. “This may be regarded as one of the Prophet's love-stories.”<ref></ref>
"There only remains Ibn Kathir (A.D. 1373) among the old expositors who rejects the oldest traditions about the incident that took place between Muhammad and Zaynab. He does that without resorting to any modification or justification to his claim. He says, “Ibn Jarir and Ibn Hatim related many stories in this regard which we discard on the grounds of being incorrect.” Ibn Kathir, however, who contests the accuracy of those stories claiming that they are incorrect, finds no fault in citing a late tradition that says: “‘You kept to yourself what God had disclosed’ means that God told you, Muhammad, that Zaynab will be one of your wives and therefore you said to him ‘Hold on to your wife.’""CITATION MISSING.<ref></ref>

{{Quote|'''CITATION MISSING.'''|If you say, “How did God reprove him for refraining to express something that he disapproved of expressing? The Prophet would not disapprove of expressing something unless it is worthy of disapproval for him and the people talk only against that which is considered loathsome to the intellects and habits. And why has He not reproved him concerning the same matter, ordering him to repress [his] lust and quell [his] soul to keep it from desiring and chasing after Zaynab? Why has He not kept His Prophet free from anything that would attach fault to him and expose him to gossip?” I would say, “How often a man is cautious about something and is ashamed to let people know about it, while it is inside him allowable, appropriate, absolutely lawful, indisputable, and God finds no fault in it! And perhaps entering into that which is allowable serves as a ladder whereby one can attain duties that leave a great effect on religion for which a man is rewarded. Unless he is cautious regarding this many people spread rumours about him, except those who have favour with God, knowledge, religion and God-given insight into the true state of affairs and into their essence, not their outward appearance. Do you know that when they would feast in the houses of the Messenger of God, reclining in their seats, not [showing desire] to leave, indulging in conversations, and the Messenger of God would be hurt by their sitting feeling upset by their speech, but constrained by shyness? Had the Messenger of God revealed what was hidden in his breast, and commanded them to disperse, they would have found it difficult [to receive] and there would be some defamatory talk. This is like man’s ambition for certain objects, such as a woman. It is a desire not characterised by ugliness in intellect or in religion, since it is not one of free choice. Also achieving what is allowable through legal means is nothing ugly; namely proposing to Zaynab and marrying her without Zayd’s suggestion that the Messenger of God marry her, or to console him for leaving her knowing firmly that Zayd’s soul was not attached to her at all, but was rather indifferent to her, and at the same time the soul of the Messenger of God was so attached to her. It was not offensive among them that a man would relinquish his wife for his friend so that the latter could marry her. When the Migrants entered Medina, they were consoled by the Helpers [al-Ansar] in everything, to the extent that if a man had two wives, he would relinquish one of them to the Migrant. So then, the matter was allowable on all sides, and it was not offensive at all. It also has not hurt or demoralised Zayd or anyone else. On the contrary, it has been the source of goodness; to mention only one of them, a cousin of the Messenger of God [that is Zaynab] secured herself [a marriage with] a close relative and high honour. As to the general good in his saying, “so that there would be no objection for believers in respect to their adopted sons’ wives once they have accomplished their purpose with them,” God should rather have reproved His Messenger when he kept it to himself by saying to him, “Hold on to your wife, and heed God.” Since God approves for him only conformity of conscience and outward [expression], and standing firm in the issues of truth so that the believers would follow his example and not be ashamed of fighting for their rights, even if it is bitter [to do so].}}

====The Wedding====

"He married Zaynab ibn Jahsh ibn Riyab al-Asadiya. Her brother Abu Ahmed married her to him, and the apostle gave her 400 ''dirhams''. She had been previously married to Zayd ibn Haritha, the freed slave of the apostle, and it was about her that God sent down:
'So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.'"<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>

Muhammad married Zaynab in late March 627 when he was 55 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref>

Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref>

For the wedding feast, Mohammed sacrificed a sheep and then commanded his servant, Anas, to invite the people to partake of it. After they had eaten, two men remained there after the meal chatting. The Messenger of Allah went out and said goodnight to his other wives and then came back and the two men were still there chatting, keeping Mohammed away from Zaynab’s bedchamber. The next day Allah sent a revelation that Muslims were not allowed to interrupt Mohammed at dinner time.
Q33:53. O you who believe! Do not go into the Prophet’s rooms except after being given permission to come and eat, not waiting for the food to be prepared, However, when you are called, then go in and when you have eaten, then disperse, and do not remain wanting to chat together. If you do that, it causes injury to the Prophet though he is too reticent to tell you. But Allah is not reticent with the truth.

Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah sent down a revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>

====Subsequent Career of Zayd====

Zayd married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba al-Umayyiya, a woman even more aristocratic than Zaynab and twenty years younger. Muhammad ordered this marriage. She bore him his son Zayd and his daughter Ruqayya. Given the short duration of the marriage, they were probably twins. Some say he divorced her.

Zayd married Fakhita Durra bint Abi Lahab al-Hashimiya. He soon afterwards divorced her.

Zayd married Hind bint Al-Awwam al-Asadiya.

Zayd commanded the Muslim army at the Battle of Muta in 629 and was among the first to be killed there.

===The Order of the Veil===

When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref>

There must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>

At this time Allah also sent down the revelation that no unrelated male could talk to Mohammed’s wives unless there was a curtain between them; Muslim women could not leave the house without their husbands’ permission, and they must wear a veil whenever they did go outdoors.
When you ask his wives for something, ask them from behind a screen. That is purer for your hearts and their hearts. It is not for you to cause injury to the Messenger of Allah nor ever to marry his wives after him. To do that would be something dreadful in the sight of Allah. Whether you make something known or conceal it, Allah has knowledge of all things. There is no blame on them regarding their fathers or their sons or their brothers or their brothers’ sons or their sisters’ sons or their women or those their right hands own. Have fear of Allah. Allah is witness over everything. Allah and His angels pray blessings of the Prophet. O you who believe! Pray blessings on him and ask for peace for him. (Q33:54-56)

Slaves were not sufficiently human to be separated from unrelated persons, but that changed if they were manumitted.

Nasa'i 100. Abu Abdullah Silim Sabalin reported. Aisha liked my honesty and hired me, and she showed me how the Messenger of Allah used to perform wudu. She rinsed her mouth, sniffed water into her nose and blew it out three times, and washed her face three times. Then she washed her right hand three times and her left hand three times. Then she put her hand on the front of her head and wiped her head once, front to back. Then she rubbed her ears with her hands, then she passed her hands over her cheeks. I came to her as a slave with a contract of manumission, and she did not hide herself from me. She would sit before me and talk to me, until I came to her one day and said: “Pray for blessing for me, O Mother of the Believers.” She said: “Why is that?” I said: “Allah has set me free.” She said: “May Allah bless you.” Then she lowered the veil in front of me, and I never saw her again after that day.

Omar went to spy on the outdoor toilets and he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” Sawda complained to Muhammad, who produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>

Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref>

Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>

Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>

The final part of this revelation was that none of Mohammed’s widows would ever be allowed to remarry.
Talha said: “Muhammad has made his women unlawful to us, and he marries our women. If Muhammad dies, I will also do what he does with our women.” At that moment this verse was revealed by the Almighty Allah: “And it does not behove you that you should give trouble to the Apostle of Allah, nor that you should marry his wives after him ever; surely this is grievous in the sight of Allah.”

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Mohammed had a private unit constructed following each wedding. This was a terrace of single-storey units that led to the courtyard of the mosque. On the upper end of one of these units a unique room, called a mashruba, was constructed, an upper storey that was accessible through a date-branch ladder. This was the room in which Zaynab processed leather. Omar speaks of three leather pieces and material used for adorning leather hanging on the walls of this room. It is mentioned in multiple narrations that Zaynab continued in this line of work after marrying Mohammed. Umm Salama also processed leather; however, it is not known whether she continued working after her marriage to Mohammed. There are numerous narrations about Zaynab’s work. She would spend her entire earnings on the needy, divorced and orphaned.

Zaynab was second to Ayesha in Muhammad's affection.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166.</ref> Aisha said: “I think that after myself, the most beloved of his wives were Zaynab and Umm Salama.”

She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:81-82.</ref>
Umm Salama said: “The Prophet appreciated Zaynab bint Jahsh and spoke of her often; she was truly a righteous woman. She would fast much and wake up for night prayers. She was skillful and she would disburse the earnings from her work entirely to the needy.” In another narration it is said that: “Zaynab was a handcrafts artist; she would process leather, sew and spend in charity in the way of Allah.”

She sold her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>

Jabir reported that Allah’s Messenger saw a woman, and so he came to his wife, Zaynab, as she was tanning a leather, and had sexual intercourse with her. He then went to his Companions and told them: “The woman advances and retires in the shape of a devil, so when one of you sees a woman, he should come to his wife, for that will repel what he feels in his heart.”<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref>

Muhammad looked through Zaynab's workroom door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>

Ibn Saad makes a curious reference to “Zaynab b Jahsh, whom people instigated and deprived from having relations with the Prophet.” The “instigation” is not expanded; it possibly refers to her quarrel with Mohammed over Safiya. We wonder who “instigated” her?

Zaynab had no children.

===Co-Wives===

Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182; Tabari 8:3.</ref>

"Zaynab bint Jahsh was married to Mohammed’s adopted son, until Mohammed spoke the Sura that she was to divorce his son and marry Mohammed. Zaynab “used to boast before the other wives of the Prophet and used to say, ‘Allah married me (to the Prophet) in the Heavens.’”"<ref>{{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|517}}; {{Bukhari|9|93|518}}.</ref>

Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 112}}.</ref>

Aisha, Hafsah and Sawdah were a team, and so were Hind and Zaynab.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}; {{Abudawud|41|4880}}.</ref>

When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>

Muhammad did not believe that "equity" meant equal distributions of material goods. He made no attempt to distribute the food equally.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}.|Narrated Urwa from Aisha: The wives of Allah’s Apostle were in two groups. One group consisted of Aisha, Hafsah, Safiyah and Sawdah; and the other group consisted of Umm Salamah and the other wives of Allah’s Apostle. The Muslims knew that Allah’s Apostle loved Aisha, so if any of them had a gift and wished to give to Allah’s Apostle, he would delay it, till Allah’s Apostle had come to Aisha’s home and then he would send his gift to Allah’s Apostle in her home. The group of Umm Salamah discussed the matter together and decided that Umm Salamah should request Allah’s Apostle to tell the people to send their gifts to him in whatever wife’s house he was. Umm Salamah told Allah’s Apostle of what they had said, but he did not reply. Then [the wives] asked Umm Salamah about it. She said, “He did not say anything to me.” They asked her to talk to him again. She talked to him again when she met him on her day, but he gave no reply. When they asked her, she replied that he had given no reply. They said to her, “Talk to him till he gives you a reply.” When it was her turn, she talked to him again. He then said to her, “Do not hurt me regarding Aisha, as the Divine Inspirations do not come to me on any of the beds except that of Ayesha.” On that Umm Salamah said, “I repent to Allah for hurting you.” Then the group of Umm Salamah called Fatima, the daughter of Allah’s Apostle, and sent her to Allah’s Apostle to say to him, “Your wives request to treat them and the daughter of Abu Bakr on equal terms.” Then Fatima conveyed the message to him. The Prophet said, “O my daughter! Don’t you love whom I love?” She replied in the affirmative and returned and told them of the situation. They requested her to go to him again but she refused. They then sent Zaynab bint Jahsh, who went to him and used harsh words saying, “Your wives request you to treat them and the daughter of Abu Quhafa’s son [Abu Bakr] on equal terms.” On that she raised her voice and abused Aisha to her face, so much so that Allah’s Apostle looked at Aisha to see whether she would retort. Aisha started replying to Zaynab till she silenced her. The Prophet then looked at Aisha and said, “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr.”}}

Abu Dawud 3:4880. Zaynab [verbally] abused Ayesha, so Mohammed told Ayesha to abuse her. “...The Apostle of Allah came upon me [Ayesha] while Zaynab bint Jahsh was with us. He began to do something with his hand. I signalled to him until I made him understand about her. So he stopped. Zaynab came on and began to abuse Ayesha. She prevented her, but she did not stop. So he (the Prophet) said to Ayesha: ‘Abuse her.’ Then she abused her and dominated her. Zaynab then went to Ali and said: ‘Ayesha abused you and did...’ (such and such). Then Fatima came (to the Prophet) and he said to her: ‘She is favourite of your father, by the Lord of the Kaaba!’ She then returned and said to them: ‘I said to him such and such, and he said to me such and such.’ Then Ali came to the Prophet and spoke to him about that.”<ref>{{Abudawud|3|4880}}.</ref>

''This is what we learn from the Perfect Example for Humanity.''

1. It was all right to love one wife more than the others.

2. It was all right to give one wife more food than the others.

3. It was all right for the wives to divide into two factions and compete against one another. (Umm Salamah and Zaynab were step-cousins and would have been friends from childhood. Aisha chose her allies for their low-threat factor: she knew that Muhammad did not love Sawdah and that Safiyah did not love Muhammad.)

4. It was not all right for Umm Salamah to ask Muhammad to use his scales and treat them fairly. She had to apologise for suggesting it.

5. It was all right for Fatima to be part of the domestic politics in terms of female/female relationships.

6. It was not all right for Fatima to disagree with her father. Once he was involved, she had to agree with him.

7. It was all right for the wives to abuse one another verbally. Muhammad cheered when Aisha won.[[User:1234567|1234567]] ([[User talk:1234567|talk]]) 03:23, 14 June 2012 (PDT)

When Aisha was accused of adultery, Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”

Zaynab's sister was flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref>

Aisha afterwards respected Zaynab.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>

Zaynab played her cards cleverly: if Ayesha was found innocent, she would be grateful to Zaynab; and if Ayesha was condemned, nobody would accuse Zaynab of having engineered her demise.

Muhammad's favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsah, in that order.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>

"Aisha reported. The Prophet used to practice ''itikaf'' [retreat] in the last ten days of Ramadan and I used to pitch a tent for him, and after offering the morning prayer, he used to enter the tent. Hafsa asked my permission to pitch a tent for herself and I allowed her and she pitched her tent. When Zaynab bint Jahsh saw it, she pitched another tent. In the morning the Prophet noticed the tents. He said, ‘What is this?” He was told of the whole situation. Then the Prophet said, “Do you think that they intended to do righteousness by doing this?” He therefore abandoned the retreat in that month and practiced retreat for ten days in the month of Shawwal." '''CITATION MISSING.'''<ref></ref> [Possibly 5ff February 628 but more likely 24ff January 629 or 3ff January 631 or 23ff December 631; not January 630 (because busy conquering Mecca).]

===Islam===

She was fervent in prayer.
"It is related by Anas ibn Malik that once the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) entered the mosque and found a rope hanging down between two of the pillars, and so he said, “What is this?” He was told, “It is for Zaynab. She prays, and when she loses concentration or feels tired, she holds onto it.” At this time the Prophet said, “Untie it. Pray as long as you feel fresh, but when you lose concentration or become tired, you should stop.”" IBN KATHIR. <ref></ref>

She was loyal to her family.

She was generous in charity. "Zaynab bint Jahsh was very generous to the poor, and indeed the Prophet said, when speaking of her to his other wives, “She is the most generous among you.”"

===Widowhood===

[When Muhammad was dying] Aisha narrated that the Prophet said to his wives, “The one who has the longest hands among you will meet me again the soonest.” Ayesha added, “They use to measure each other’s hands to see whose as longest, and it was the hand of Zaynab that was the longest, because she used to work by hand and give away (what she earned) in charity.” The Messenger of Allah said to Omar, “Zaynab bint Jahsh is one who is full of prayer.” A man said, “Messenger of Allah, what is that?” He said, “The one who is humble and earnest in prayer.” Ayesha also said that Zaynab, “I have never seen a woman so pure as Zaynab, so God-fearing, so truthful, so attentive to family ties, so generous, so self-sacrificing in everyday life, so charitable, and thus so close to Allah, the Exalted.”

Zaynab was about 42 when Muhammad died.

"When Omar was caliph (634-644), great wealth came to the Muslims as a result of their victories in fighting the Persians. The immense treasures of Chosroes, the Persian Emperor, fell into their hands, and when Omar sent Zaynab a pile of gold as her share of the treasure, she called her servant and told her to take a handful of it to so-and-so, naming one of the poor people of Medina. One after another, she named all the poor people whom she knew, until they had all received a share of the treasure. Then she told her maidservant to see what was left. All that remained of the large pile of gold was eighty dinars ($4000), and this she accepted as her share, thanking Allah for it; but, because she believed so much money was a temptation, she asked Allah that she would never witness such a large distribution of wealth again. By the time a year had passed, when Omar again came to distribute money amongst those wives of the Prophet who were still alive, her prayer had been granted, for she had already passed away. She was the first to demise among his widows."

===Death===

Zaynab died in summer 641, "thus fulfilling the Prophet’s indication that she would be the first of his wives to die after him."

"Zaynab bint Jahsh died when she was 53 years old."<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 182}}.</ref>

Umar led her funeral, and her brother Abu Ahmed carried her into her grave. She was buried in the Celestial Cemetery.

Aisha wept when she heard the news, saying, “Zaynab was a good woman.” This reaction surprised the community, suggesting that it was widely known that the pair had never been friends.

===See Also===

===References===
{{reflist}}

User:1234567/Sandbox 1

2013-06-21T02:52:21Z

1234567: /* Poverty */

==Aisha bint Abi Bakr, Part 1==

[[File:DanishAisha.jpg|right|thumb|Aisha’s wedding day. Commissioned for Bluitgen, K. (2006). ''Koranen og profeten Muhammeds Liv'' (''The Quran and the Life of the Prophet Muhammad''). Copenhagen: Hoest & Soen. The artist chose to remain anonymous.|300px]]

Aisha bint Abi Bakr claimed that she was the [[Muhammad|Prophet Muhammad’s]] second wife,<ref>{{Muslim|8|3452}}.</ref> although this was not strictly correct.<ref>Aisha must have known that Muhammad married Sawdah bint Zamaa in the ninth month and herself in the tenth month of the same year ({{Tabari|39|pp. 170-171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:43, 55; {{Muslim|8|3312}}). However, the sequence of events in {{Tabari|9|pp. 128-130}} makes it clear that Muhammad did propose to Aisha before he proposed to Sawdah: “Khawlah replied, ‘The Messenger of God has sent me to ask for A’ishah’s hand in marriage on his behalf.’ … Then Khawlah left and went to Sawdah saying, ‘O Sawdah ... the Messenger of God has sent me with a marriage proposal.’” By claiming to be the second wife, i.e., the first after Khadijah, Aisha probably wanted to emphasise that she had been Muhammad’s first choice and was therefore more important than her co-wives.</ref> She is known as Aisha ''al-Siddiqa'' (“the Truthful”)<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref> to complement her father, who was also known as ''al-Siddiq''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46. “Masruq … would say, “The truthful daughter of the true, whose innocence was proclaimed, told me such-and-such.”</ref> This byname originally referred, not to Abu Bakr’s personal honesty, but to his “testimony to the truth” of Muhammad’s miraculous [[The Holy Qur'an: Al-Isra (The Night Journey)|Night Journey]].<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 183.</ref> Muslims consider Aisha another major “witness to the truth” of Muhammad’s prophetic office. The Syrian scholar Ismail ibn Umar ibn Kathir wrote:
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|A great deal of the knowledge that we still have today, about how our beloved Prophet lived and behaved, was first remembered and then taught to others by Aisha … This is what makes it so much easier for those who wish to follow in their footsteps to try and follow their example.}}
Aisha’s witness has bequeathed to the world a wealth of truth about the nature of Islam.

===Aisha’s Background===

Aisha was born in [[Mecca]] “at the beginning of the fourth year of prophethood,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> i.e., between 25 October 613 and 19 February 614.

Her father was the cloth-merchant Abu Bakr ibn Abi Quhafah from the Taym clan of the Quraysh. “He was a man whose society was desired, well liked and of easy manners … of high character and kindliness. His people used to come to him to discuss many matters with him because of his wide knowledge, his experience in commerce, and his sociable nature.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> His generosity had made him popular in the city.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}.</ref> Abu Bakr’s first wife was Qutaylah bint Abduluzza from the Amir ibn Luayy clan of the Quraysh. She bore him a daughter, Asma.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> He then married his business partner’s widow, Umm Ruman (Zaynab) bint Amir. She was an immigrant from the Kinana tribe whose only relative in Mecca was her young son, Tufayl ibn Al-Harith;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 171}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Muhammad once said that she looked like a ''houri''.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> She was the mother of Abu Bakr’s first son, Abdulrahman.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 171-172}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> Qutaylah then bore him a second son, Abdullah;<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 193}}.</ref> but soon afterwards, Abu Bakr divorced Qutaylah.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:178: “Abu Bakr had divorced her in the ''Jahiliyah'',” i.e., before Islam, and therefore not, as is sometimes asserted, because of religious differences.</ref>

The family lived near [[Khadijah bint Khuwaylid|Khadijah’s]] house<ref>Muir (1861). ''The Life of Mohamet'', p. 100. London: Smith, Elder & Co.</ref> and must have known Muhammad for several years before the latter declared himself a prophet in 610. Abu Bakr “did not hold back or hesitate.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116.</ref> He was the first male outside Muhammad’s family to convert to Islam.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115. According to {{Tabari|39|p. 201}}, one woman, Lubabah bint Al-Harith, claimed that her conversion pre-dated Abu Bakr’s.</ref> “When he became a Muslim, he showed his faith openly and called others to God and his apostle… He began to call to God and to Islam all whom he trusted of those who came to him and sat with him… He brought them to the apostle when they had accepted his invitation and they accepted Islam and prayed.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115, 116.</ref> The earliest Muslim historian, [[Ibn Ishaq|Muhammad ibn Ishaq]], lists fifty people who became Muslims through Abu Bakr’s preaching,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115-117.</ref> which was probably the majority of the earliest converts.

Aisha was born in the year when Islam was first publicly preached in Mecca<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 117.</ref> and she never knew any lifestyle other than Islam.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> She grew up in a household where her mother was the only wife and she had four much-older siblings. The records also mention several servants.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 116, 144, 224; </ref> Aisha was still a baby when a pagan neighbour, Al-Mutim ibn Adiy, proposed that she marry his son Jubayr. Abu Bakr informally accepted this proposal but he did not enter a binding marriage contract.<ref>{{Tabari|9|pp. 129-130}}.</ref> Aisha’s paternal grandparents, already in their 70s at the time of her birth, lived nearby.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Her grandmother, Umm Al-Khayr bint Sakhr, was a Muslim,<ref>Ibn Hajar, ''Al-Isaba'' vol. 8.</ref> but her grandfather, Abu Quhafah ibn Amir, remained a pagan. When he spoke disparagingly of Muhammad, Abu Bakr hit his father’s chest so hard that the old man became unconscious.<ref>Qurtubi, ''Tafsir'' vol. 17 p. 307. Cited in [http://books.google.com.au/books?id=AeAG74TdAXEC&printsec=frontcover&source=gbs_ge_summary_r&cad=0#v=onepage&q&f=false/ Radtke, B., & O’Kane, J. (1996). ''The Concept of Sainthood in Early Islamic Mysticism'', p. 142. Richmond, Surrey: Curzon Press] and also in [http://www.tasawwuf.org/writings/love_prophet/love_abubakr.pdf/ “The Love of Hadrat Abu Bakr”, p. 6, in ''Tasawwuf'']. It is said that Allah sent down {{Quran|58|22}} in response.</ref>

Aisha was less than three years old when the Quraysh declared a blockade against the Hashimite clan.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 159-160.</ref> Abu Bakr considered leaving Mecca to join the exiles in Abyssinia. But he found a protector who agreed to keep the neighbours from harassing him on condition he confined his religion to the privacy of his home and did not try to convert anyone else. Abu Bakr kept to the letter of the agreement and stopped preaching outside his home; but he found a way to break its spirit. He built a mosque in the courtyard of his house, where he once again read the Qur’an out loud. When women and youths flocked to hear his preaching, the men challenged his duplicity, and Abu Bakr renounced his protection.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|37|494}}; Guillaume/Ishaq 171.</ref> Nevertheless, the worst recorded attack on Abu Bakr is that “one of the loutish fellows of Quraysh” once threw dust on his head,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 171-172.</ref> an understandable expression of annoyance under the circumstances. Aisha recalled that the ''ayat'' {{Quran|54|46}}, concerning the occasion when the moon was miraculously split in the sky, was first recited in Mecca when she was “a little girl at play,” three or four years old. She did not, however, claim to remember the miracle itself.<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|387}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|388}}; {{Bukhari|6|60|399}}; {{Bukhari|6|61|515}}. The Lebanese scholar Dr [http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Gibril Haddad] says: “The ''hadith'' masters, ''sira'' historians and Qur’anic commentators agree that the splitting of the moon took place about five years before the Holy Prophet’s ''Hijra'' to Madina,” i.e., in 617-618.</ref>

When Aisha was six, the blockade against the Hashimites was revoked, and the clan emerged from hiding in the mountain ravine. After that, Muhammad came to visit her father every morning and evening.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Bukhari|5|58|245}}.</ref> Aisha never met his wife Khadijah,<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|166}}.</ref> who returned to Mecca in poor health and died shortly afterwards.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 191; {{Tabari|39|pp. 4, 161}}; Bewley/Saad 8:12, 152.</ref>

===Reasons for the Marriage===

When Khadijah died in April 620, “the Prophet was terribly grieved over her,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54.</ref> and “people feared for him.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> After only a few days, Khawlah bint Hakim, the sister-in-law of his friend [[Umar al Khattab (quotes)|Umar]],<ref>She was married to Uthman ibn Mazoon (Guillaume/Ishaq 590), whose sister Zaynab was married to Umar (Bewley/Saad 8:56).</ref> decided that he needed a new wife. She called on Muhammad to tell him that she knew of both a maid and a matron whom he might [[Marriage|marry]] and asked which one he would prefer. He immediately responded that he would take them both.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}.</ref>

The maid was Abu Bakr’s daughter. It is often claimed that Muhammad married her “to reinforce the friendly relations already existing with Abu Bakr.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?''].</ref> In one sense this is true: Abu Bakr was one of the few men in Mecca who would still have been willing to give him a daughter.<ref>For Muhammad’s unpopularity with his pagan neighbours, see Guillaume/Ishaq 191-194.</ref> But this assertion mistakes cause and effect. The marriage did not “promote” any alliance with Abu Bakr; rather, it was the existing close bond with Abu Bakr that made the marriage possible. Did Muhammad’s request to his friend even reflect Khawlah’s original intention? The oral traditions about Muhammad’s life were first put in writing long after his death,<ref>Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: Its Origin, Development, Special Features and Criticism'', pp. 8-9. “''Hadith'' which thus spread throughout the vast Muslim dominions had been preserved for a century partly in writing (in the form of laws and letters dictated by Muhammad himself, and in the form of various ''Sahifahs'' ascribed to many of his Companions), and partly in the memory of those who had associated with him and watched carefully his words and deeds. After the death of Muhammad, Umar I intended to collect the ''Ahadith''. He gave the matter his careful consideration for one whole month, invoking the help of God in his decision, and seeking the advice of his friends. But he had to give up the great project for fear of the Qur’an being neglected by the Muslims.” Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> and it could be that they have been distorted by narrators who did not know about the interview with Khawlah until they also had hind-knowledge of its result. It is not impossible that Khawlah originally mentioned “Abu Bakr’s daughter” without giving the name, and that she had actually been referring to his elder daughter Asma. Regardless of whether or not Khawlah was complicit in the eventual outcome, what happened was that Muhammad, the Apostle of Allah, completely overlooked the sixteen-year-old Asma<ref>[http://qa.sunnipath.com/issue_view.asp?HD=7&ID=4604&CATE=1/ Haddad] cites Al-Dhahabi in ''Siyar Alam al-Nubala'' vol. 2 p. 289: “Asma was ten years older than Aisha.” Haddad points out that Al-Dhahabi elsewhere suggests Asma might have been even older than this, possibly as old as twenty-five.</ref> and asked instead to marry the six-year-old Aisha.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref>

It is also suggested that Muhammad “married Aisha for the benefit of Islam and Humanity … From her, 2210 Hadith have come... Many of her transmissions pertain to some of the most intimate aspects of personal behaviour which only someone in Aisha's position could have learnt.”<ref>[http://www.iol.ie/~afifi/BICNews/Sabeel/sabeel6.htm/ ''Why Did Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) Married Young Aisha Siddiqa (r.a.)?'']</ref> This makes no sense. If Muhammad had wanted the traditions about his life to be securely transmitted to posterity, he would not have relied on the hope that his young widow might later think of it; he would have arranged to have them committed to writing during his lifetime. He never did. Further, if he had believed that a wife was the best kind of chronicler, he would have chosen an adult spouse who knew how to write. Aisha could in fact read<ref>{{Bukhari|6|61|515}}; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> but she never learned to write.<ref>Baladhuri, ''Conquest of the Lands'', cited in [http://english.sahartv.ir/media/pdf/The%20Unschooled%20Prophet.pdf/ Mutahhari, S. A. M. ''The Unschooled Prophet''. Tehran: Islamic Propagation Organization.] “It is reported that Aisha used to read the Qur’an but she did not write.”</ref>

What Muhammad later said was that [[Allah]] had instructed him to marry Aisha. He said the angel [[Gabriel|Jibreel]] had appeared to him in a dream, holding a veiled child and saying, “Messenger of Allah, this one will remove some of your sorrow. This one has some of the qualities of Khadijah.” Then he lifted the veil, revealing that the child was Aisha.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:54-55; {{Muslim|31|5977}}.</ref> In a second dream, Jibreel showed him Aisha’s portrait painted on silk, promising, “She will be your wife in Paradise.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|58|235}}; {{Bukhari|9|87|140}}.</ref> If Muhammad really had any such dream, it is disturbing that he would act on it so literally.

Muhammad’s decision to marry Aisha was made less than three weeks after Khadijah’s death<ref>Khadijah died on 10 Ramadan, and Muhammad married Sawdah before Ramadan had ended. Even if he married her on the ''same day'' as Khawlah’s visit (the day he also decided to marry Aisha), this was a maximum of twenty days after Khadijah’s death. Common sense suggests that it would have more likely taken a day or two to organise the wedding, which did not necessarily take place as late as the final day of the month.</ref> while he was grieving. He was not necessarily making wise decisions, even from his own point of view. There is little doubt that Muhammad’s choice of Aisha over Asma was influenced by Aisha’s personal qualities. That she was very pretty was conceded by people who had no vested interest<ref>{{Bukhari|6|60|435}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|145}}.</ref> as well as by those who might have been biased.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 495; {{Bukhari|3|48|829}}; {{Bukhari|5|59|462}}.</ref> She was slim and light-framed<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}}</ref> with a fair, rosy complexion and perhaps also red hair,<ref>In Al-Nasa’i 5:307 and Bewley/Saad 8:55, Muhammad addresses Aisha as ''Humayra'', which means “little red one”. This was not a commonplace nickname, so Aisha’s degree of redness must have been unusual.</ref> which she wore plaited.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|241}}.</ref> Her nephew later said, “I did not see a greater scholar than Aisha in poetry, Arab history and genealogy,”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 67; Al-Hakim, ''Mustadrak'' vol. 4 p. 11. See also Al-Dhahabi, “Aisha, Mother of the Faithful” in ''Tadhkirat al-Huffaz'' p. 1/13.</ref> and it was said that there was no one else “more intelligent in opinion if her opinion was sought.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 2, p. 481.</ref> While we might question whether Muhammad was aware of her intelligence when she was only six years old, she had indeed “some of the qualities of Khadijah,” who is described as “determined and intelligent”.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref>

===Marriage Contract===

When Muhammad made his formal request for Aisha’s hand, he did not mention that Allah had “commanded” him to marry her.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> Abu Bakr hesitated at first, saying, “Would this be suitable, since she is like my brother’s daughter?” But Muhammad said that their brotherhood was purely spiritual and did not preclude such a marriage.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|18}}.</ref> Abu Bakr had to break off Aisha’s informal engagement to Jubayr ibn Al-Mutim, but this proved easy, as the pagan family no longer wished to risk that their son might convert to Islam.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> So Abu Bakr married his daughter to Muhammad in May or June 620. Unlike Abu Bakr’s previous agreement with Al-Mutim, his contract with Muhammad was not a “betrothal” or “engagement” (as some English translators have suggested) but in every way a legally binding marriage, which could only be dissolved by death or divorce.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|1|7|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|2|3309}}; {{Muslim|2|3310}}; {{Muslim|2|3311}}; {{Muslim|4|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; Bewley/Saad 8:55; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref>

Soon afterwards, Aisha was sent to Muhammad with a basket of dates. As soon as they were alone in the room, Muhammad “stretched out his blessed hand and grabbed her clothes.” Aisha “glared” at him and exclaimed, “People call you The Trustworthy, but to me you are The Treacherous!” She shook him off, rearranged her clothes and went to complain to her father. Abu Bakr showed no anger or even surprise; he only told her that she was now married to Muhammad, who was therefore treating her like a wife.<ref>Abdulrahman Hamdanius, ''Al-Shabayat'', cited in Maracci, L. (1698). ''Vita Mahometis'', p. 23. Padua, Italy: Seminary Printing Press.</ref> While there is no record that Muhammad attacked Aisha again as long as she lived in her father’s house (he had probably not expected that a child as young as six would resist him), it is sufficient evidence of his sexual intentions towards her that such an attack should have occurred even once.

Although Aisha heard her father’s words, it seems she did not really understand them, for she later claimed that she had not known that she was married until the very day of the consummation.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43. “I did not know that the Messenger of Allah had married me until my mother took me and made me sit in the room rather than being outside [on the day of the consummation]. Then it occurred to me that I was married.”</ref> That Aisha did not know that she was married was, of course, nothing unusual. Throughout history and in nearly every culture, betrothals have been arranged over cradles, and women in particular have been married without their knowledge, understanding or consent. The fact that Aisha was a child is barely an issue here; no woman of any age should be married without her own consent, whether she is six, sixteen, thirty-six or sixty. However, it is unlikely that any seventh-century Arab grasped “informed consent” in the way the modern West understands it. Muhammad’s similar failure to grasp it betrays that he was no prophet or pioneer of human rights but was simply a normal product of his own culture.

Muhammad instructed Umm Ruman, “Take good care of Aisha and watch over her for me.” The family therefore gave Aisha a “special position”. One day Aisha complained to her father about her mother. This made Abu Bakr was angry with both of them. Umm Ruman “came after” Aisha, who hid behind the front door, “weeping with great distress.” When Muhammad arrived for his daily visit, Aisha told him everything. Muhammad’s eyes “overflowed with tears” as he reminded Umm Ruman, “Didn’t I tell you to watch over Aisha for me?” Umm Ruman tried to give her side of the story, but Muhammad replied, “So what?” Aisha’s mother had to promise, “I will never trouble her again.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> As the specific details have been omitted from this story, it is not apparent whether it was Umm Ruman who was a difficult mother or Aisha who was a difficult child, or even whether it was Abu Bakr who was a difficult husband and father; but it is certain that Muhammad was interfering with another family’s affairs without any interest in knowing all the facts.

In 622 Abu Bakr accompanied Muhammad on his flight (''Hijra'') to [[Medina]]. He took all his savings with him, leaving nothing to support his family, much to the consternation of his elderly father. Asma had to fool her grandfather, who was blind, by touching his hand to a cloth covering a pile of stones and letting him believe they were a sack of coins.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 225.</ref> Fortunately it was only a few months before Abu Bakr sent for his family to join him in Medina. Aisha had an adventure on the way: “My camel broke loose. I was sitting in the ''howdah'' with my mother, and she started exclaiming, ‘Alas, my daughter! Alas, you bride!’ But they caught up with our camel after it had safely descended the Lift Valley.”<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172}); Bewley/Saad 8:44-45.</ref> After the dry heat of Mecca, the emigrants found Medina damp and cool, and several of them were struck by fever. Aisha was bemused by the delirious ramblings of two of Abu Bakr’s servants and asked Muhammad what it meant. Some of the Muslims were so weak that they said their prayers sitting down until Muhammad advised them, “The prayer of the sitter is only half as valuable as the prayer of the stander.” Thereupon they “painfully struggled to their feet.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 413-414.</ref> Then Aisha herself became feverish for a whole month, and her hair fell out.<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876.</ref>

===Paedophilia===

After Aisha had recovered, “and my hair had grown back past my earlobes,”<ref>{{Muslim|8|3309}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876</ref> Abu Bakr approached Muhammad and asked him if he would like to consummate the marriage. He did not explain why he suddenly lost his scruples over child-marriage; but Aisha’s illness would have hinted at her mortality, while the flight to Medina must have altered the political landscape unrecognisably, so perhaps Abu Bakr felt the need to confirm his continuing importance in the Muslim hierarchy. The family landscape had also changed, for Abu Bakr had lately acquired a new wife, Habibah bint Kharijah, a Medinan woman whom he visited in the suburbs at a discreet distance from the mosque.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:243. “Habiba bint Kharija ibn Zayd … married Abu Bakr ''as-Siddiq'' and bore him Umm Kulthum.” See also Guillaume/Ishaq 227, 234. P. 681 shows that Habibah never resided near the mosque even after Umm Ruman died. See also {{Tabari|11|pp. 151-152}}.</ref> Perhaps he expected this marriage to produce new financial burdens, although in fact Habibah’s only child, Umm Kulthum, was not to be born until 634.<ref>{{Tabari|11|p. 141 & f769}}; Bewley/Saad 8:243; {{Muwatta|36|33|40}}.</ref> It is worth noting that Habibah’s grandfather was still alive and apparently fit and active.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/AsbabAlnuzol.asp?SoraName=4&Ayah=34&search=yes&img=A/ Al-Wahidi, ''Asbab Al-Nuzul''. Translated by Guezzou, M. (2011). ''Context of Revelation'', Q4:34. Amman, Jordan: Royal Aal al-Bayt Institute for Islamic Thought.]</ref> This suggests that Habibah was a very young woman, which might also have caused Abu Bakr to revise his ideas about the suitable age for a girl to marry.

Muhammad did not express any outrage or disgust at this invitation; instead of correcting his friend’s morality, he merely confessed that he had no cash to pay the dower. Abu Bakr replied that he would provide this.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 172-173}}.</ref> The earliest source states that it was a sum of 400 ''dirhams''<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918</ref> (about £2,000), but others say 12½ ounces,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 173, 189}}; {{Muslim|38|3318}; {{Abudawud|11|2101}}; Bewley/Saad 8:118. The ounces were presumably of silver, since the same weight of gold would have had ten times this value. Perhaps the later chroniclers updated for inflation.</ref> which would have been worth 500 ''dirhams'' (£2,500). It is also said that that dower was “some household goods worth 50 ''dirhams''”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44</ref> (£250), so perhaps part of the value was paid in kind.

[[File:Mosque630.jpg|left|thumb|Plan of the mosque at Medina, c. 630. Aisha’s house is at the top left, marked with A.|300px]]

Umm Ruman tried to fatten Aisha up before sending her to Muhammad’s house. Several types of food failed to replace the flesh that she had lost during her illness “till she gave me cucumber with fresh dates to eat. Then I became fat as good.”<ref>{{Abudawud|28|3894}}.</ref> In April or May 623 Aisha, now aged nine, was playing on a swing with some friends when her mother called her over. Still breathless, Aisha was taken to the little house that had just been built into the wall of the mosque, a hut of unbaked bricks with a palm-branch roof, perhaps five metres by four in size.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 172-173; Bewley/Saad 8:121; [http://www.soebratie.nl/religie/hadith/IbnSad.html#Book 65.3/ Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' vol. 1:65:3].</ref> When she was brought inside, where some ''ansar'' women wished her good luck, “it occurred to me that I was married. I did not ask her, and my mother was the one who told me.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:43.</ref> For some reason, Umm Ruman then departed, leaving the ''ansar'' women to wash and perfume Aisha, dress her up in a red-striped gown and comb her hair. When her father’s friend Muhammad arrived, she was surprised, suggesting that she had still not guessed the identity of her bridegroom, but not afraid. The women left the house, and Muhammad sat her on his lap.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|7|62|88}}; {{Bukhari|7|62|90}}; {{Muslim|8|3309}}; {{Muslim|8|3310}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Abudawud|41|4915}}; {{Abudawud|41|4917}}; {{Tabari|9|pp. 130-131}}; Ibn Majah 3:1876; Ibn Majah 3:1877.</ref> The consummation was not marked by any kind of wedding party or public celebration: “neither a camel nor a sheep was slaughtered for me.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 131}}.</ref> This possibly indicates that, while the Muslim converts did not question Muhammad’s judgment, he knew only too well what his [[Islam and the People of the Book|Jewish]] neighbours would think of his bigamy.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:143. “They envied him because of the number of his wives and they criticised him for that, saying, ‘If he had been a prophet, he would not have desired women.’ The most intense of them in that criticism was Huyayy ibn Akhtab,” the chief of the Nadir tribe. It is probably not a coincidence that, just five years later, Muhammad’s collection of wives included Huyayy’s favourite daughter. It is not stated, however, that Huyayy had a specific objection to Aisha’s extreme youth. </ref>

Aisha often said, “I was preferred over the wives of the Prophet,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:46</ref> and asked rhetorically, “Which of his wives is more fortunate than I?”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:44.</ref> She was always very proud of her position as the beloved of the Prophet and never recognised that she had been [[Rape in Islam|raped]]. She spoke calmly of the way Muhammad sucked her tongue<ref>{{Abudawud|13|2380}}.</ref> and took baths with her in the same tub,<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|263}}; {{Bukhari|1|6|298}}.</ref> and of how she would then wash the semen off his clothes<ref>{{Bukhari|1|4|229}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|230}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|231}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|232}}; {{Bukhari|1|4|233}}.</ref> and anoint him with perfume<ref>{{Bukhari|1|5|267}}.</ref> (his favourite was ''dhikarat al-tayyib'', a blend of musk and ambergris<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:11.</ref>).

Aisha’s acceptance of the situation does not alter the fact that a fifty-two-year-old man should have known better than to engage sexually with a nine-year-old. Most cultures throughout history have understood that a girl should not be touched before puberty. The Jews in Medina most certainly understood it.<ref>Ezekiel 16:7-8; [http://www.jewfaq.org/marriage.htm/ “Prohibited Marriages and Illegitimate Children”] in ''Judaism 101''.</ref> Muslim apologists have tried to plead that Aisha was an early developer for whom “it is most likely her puberty started at 8, and continued till she was 9, and once she was going through puberty and her menses, this made her a lady and not a girl anymore.”<ref>[http://muslim-responses.com/Marriage_with_Aisha/Marriage_with_Aisha_/ Zaatari, S. “A Detailed analysis of the Prophet's Marriage to Aisha”] in ''Muslim Responses''.</ref> But this is not correct. Aisha had still not reached menarche by the age of fourteen and a half, more than five years after the consummation of her marriage. She several times described her fourteen-year-old self as a ''jariya'' (“prepubescent girl”)<ref>{{Bukhari|3|48|829}} also refers to her light weight at the time of the raid on the Mustaliq tribe. {{Muslim|4|1940}} emphasises her “tender age” at the time of the Abyssinian sword-display, which must have happened after the Order of the Veil, since Muhammad had to screen her, i.e., at earliest in March 628.</ref> and in July 628 was still playing with dolls, which were forbidden to adults but permitted to prepubescents.<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}.</ref> Although this could not have been predicted on her wedding day, she actually belonged to the 10% of girls who are latest in reaching puberty.<ref>The [http://www.mum.org/menarage.htm/ mean age of menarche] was 12½ years. This is quite similar to today, when the [http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2733039/ standard deviation] is about 18 months. So probably only 5% of Aisha’s contemporaries would have been menstruating before age ten, 16% by age eleven, 32% by age twelve, 68% by age thirteen, 84% by age fourteen, 95% by age fifteen and over 99% by age sixteen. These statistics suggest that Aisha did menstruate within twelve months of the doll-playing incident, but the exact date is not recorded.</ref> At nine, she would have been flat-chested and only three-quarters of her future height; nobody could have mistaken her for an adult. Unlike the informed consent issue, which simply reveals that Muhammad was a product of his culture, this act of paederasty betrays that Muhammad was morally inferior to his own culture. He rejected the moral norms of his wisest contemporaries and abused a little girl for no better reason than that Abu Bakr had made it easy for him to do so. He demonstrated for once and for all that he had no timeless, universal moral insight to offer the world – in short, that he was not a prophet.

===Relationship with Muhammad===

Aisha was to remain Muhammad’s favourite wife.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|755}}; {{Muslim|31|5984}}.</ref> He claimed that Aisha was dearer to him “than butter with dates”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:55.</ref> and superior to all other women in the same way that a meat stew was superior to plain bread.<ref>{{Bukhari|4|55|623}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|113}}; {{Bukhari|5|57|114}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|329}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|330}}; {{Bukhari|7|65|339}}.</ref> When a companion asked him, “Whom do you love most in this world?” he replied, “Aisha!” When the young man protested that he had meant ''male'' persons, Muhammad corrected his reply to, “Her father.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|57|14}}.</ref> He made himself a doorway in the mosque wall close to Aisha’s house-door,<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 173}}; Bewley/Saad 8:45.</ref> presumably to visit her more conveniently. At table he would eat meat from a bone that she had bitten and drink from her cup.<ref>[http://ahadith.co.uk/chapter.php?cid=153&page=8/ Nasa’i 1:70.]</ref> As he once sat repairing his sandals, Aisha stared at him until he asked why. She replied, “Al-Huthali’s poem was written for you! He said that if you looked to the majesty of the moon, it twinkles and lights up the world for everybody to see.” Muhammad walked over to her, kissed her between the eyes, and said, “I swear to Allah, Aisha, you are like that to me and more.”<ref>''Sunan'' al-Bayhaqi #15825.</ref> She once asked, “How is your love for me?” and he replied that it was, “Like the rope’s knot.” After that she would often ask, “How is the knot?” and he would reply, “The same as ever!”<ref>[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].</ref>

Muhammad allowed Aisha her playtime. Her collection of dolls included at least three shaped like female humans<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}; {{Muslim|8|3311}}; {{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and a stuffed horse with wings. Muhammad questioned her about this anomaly but he laughed when she reminded him that Solomon was supposed to have owned winged horses.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|4914}}.</ref> Strangely, neither of them mentioned that Muhammad himself claimed to have ridden a winged horse a few years earlier.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 182; {{Bukhari|4|54|429}}; {{Bukhari|5|58|227}}.</ref> Aisha said that (presumably after she grew older) she used to hide her dolls under a garment when Muhammad entered, “but she did not stop.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:47.</ref>

At first her playmates “felt shy of Allah’s Messenger”<ref>{{Muslim|31|5981}}.</ref> and “used to hide themselves” when Muhammad entered her house, “but the Prophet would call them to join and play with me.”<ref>{{Bukhari|8|73|151}}</ref> At festival time her friends sang badly and beat tambourines in her house, although Muhammad came to lie down there. Abu Bakr rebuked them: “Musical instruments of Satan near the Prophet!” But Muhammad told the girls not to stop their play for him.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}; {{Bukhari|2|15|72}}.</ref> Later that day, some Abyssinian guests put on a display in the mosque courtyard to demonstrate their prowess with shields and spears. Women were not really allowed, but Muhammad circumvented the regulation by standing in front of Aisha at her front door, screening her with his cloak, so that she could watch the performance without being seen.<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|70}}.</ref> She once beat him in a running race. Later, after she had put on weight, they raced again, and he won, remarking, “This pays you back for that other time!”<ref>{{Abudawud|14|2572}}.</ref> Given the chance to mount an unbroken camel, she drove it “round and round” until Muhammad had to remind her to be gentle with the animal.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6275}}; {{Muslim|32|6274}}. See also {{Abudawud|41|4790}}.</ref>

But what these “innocent” episodes demonstrate, above anything else, is that Aisha ''was'' a child. A grown woman does not play with dolls and swings. Aisha was just a little girl who, like any other little girl, was inconsiderate about noise<ref>{{Bukhari|2|15|72}}</ref> and could not cook.<ref>Al-Nasa’i 8917 tells an incident where a co-wife declines to eat Aisha’s cooking and Muhammad also avoids tasting it; since politeness compelled people, even if “not hungry,” to accept at least a small portion, the food is presumably not fit to eat. {{Bukhari|3|48|829}} reveals that Aisha usually delegated the daily baking to her maid and did not even watch the rising dough reliably. In Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 p. 227 (see also {{Bukhari|1|7|152}}), the teenaged Aisha is so jealous of a co-wife’s superior culinary skills that she smashes her dish.</ref> While (as shown above) she could be surprisingly assertive towards her elders, she was no match for Muhammad on an ongoing basis. In such a situation of power imbalance, she often resorted to hinting indirectly when she was angry with him, by declaiming, “By the lord of Ibrahim,” instead of her usual, “By the lord of Muhammad.” However, he took the hint.<ref>{{Bukhari|7|62|155}}.</ref>

===Poverty===

Muhammad taught that women “have the right to their food and clothing in accordance with the custom.”<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 112-113}}. See also {{Abudawud|11|2137}}.</ref> But he did not provide much food for Aisha, and she was always hungry. She was underweight because she so rarely ate meat.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 494; {{Muslim|37|6673}}.</ref> She claimed she never ate barley bread for more than three successive days. Sometimes the family did not light a fire for a month on end because they had nothing to cook but lived off dates and water.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7085}}; {{Muslim|42|7083}}; {{Muslim|42|7086}}; {{Muslim|42|7084}}; {{Muslim|42|7087}}; {{Muslim|42|7089}}; {{Muslim|42|7092}}; {{Muslim|42|7093}}; {{Muslim|42|7097}}; {{Muslim|42|7098}}.</ref> A neighbour once sent Aisha a pudding. While she was finishing her prayers, a cat came in and ate some of it, but she had no compunction in eating from the place that the cat had licked.<ref>{{Abudawud|1|76}}. This incident probably dates from after Aisha was widowed; but she maintained the habits she had learned from Muhammad.</ref>

Muhammad told Aisha, “Beware of sitting with the wealthy, and do not replace a garment until you have already mended it.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:53.</ref> Throughout her life, she disliked discarding worn-out clothes.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:52.</ref> She did own a gown costing about five ''dirhams'' (£25), and “no woman desiring to appear elegant before her husband failed to borrow [it] from me.” But the cloth cannot have been of very high quality compared to what became available in Medina in later decades, for although the widowed Aisha continued to wear similar clothes, her [[Slavery|slave]] refused to wear such a coarse gown in the house.<ref>{{Bukhari|3|47|796}}.</ref> The mosque had no indoor toilets, “for we loathe and detest them,”<ref>Guilaume/Ishaq 495.</ref> and Aisha did not have a lamp in her house.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|9|492}}.</ref> When her quilt was stolen, it was a real loss, and she began to curse the unknown thief. However, Muhammad told her not to do so, because curses on earth would only lessen the thief’s punishment in the Hereafter.<ref>{{Abudawud|8|1492}}; {{Abudawud|41|4891}}.</ref>

Charity was a way of life for the Arabs, and of course the Prophet’s young wife had to set the example. In the early years, beggars sat on the Bench in the mosque courtyard waiting for food distribution.<ref>{{Bukhari|1|10|576}}: “The ''Suffa'' companions were poor people, and the Prophet said, ‘Whoever has food for two persons should take a third one from them.’” See also [http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life3/chap8.htm/ Muir (1861), pp. 20-21.]</ref> Aisha used to count them until Muhammad told her, “Give and do not calculate, [or else] calculation will be made against you.”<ref>{{Abudawud|9|1696}}.</ref> Sometimes he brought them into her house to be fed, although she struggled to find food “as small in quantity as a pigeon” to serve them.<ref>{{Abudawud|41|5022}}.</ref> On one occasion a beggar came to her door on a fast-day, and Aisha told her maid to give him their only loaf. The servant protested that there would be nothing to break their fast, but Aisha insisted.<ref>{{Muwatta|58|1|5}}.</ref> On another occasion, a widow with two daughters came begging, and Aisha’s larder was reduced to one date. She handed it over, and the widow divided it between the children without taking anything for herself.<ref>{{Muslim|32|6362}}; {{Bukhari|8|73|24}}.</ref> Ibn Kathir, writing seven hundred years after the event, cited this old tradition.
{{Quote|[http://www.islamawareness.net/Muhammed/ibn_kathir_wives.html/ Ibn Kathir, ''The Wives of the Prophet Muhammad (SAW)''].|The Prophet had sacrificed an animal, and Ayesha was so generous in sharing the meat out amongst the poor that she found that she had left nothing for the Messenger’s large household except the shoulder of the animal. Feeling a little distressed, she went to the Prophet, and said, “I’ve only been able to save this.” “That is the only part that you have not saved,” smiled the Prophet, “for whatever you give away in the name of Allah, you save, and whatever you keep for yourself, you lose.”}}
The shoulder was Muhammad’s favourite part of the sheep.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 516</ref>

The fact that Aisha had a servant does not indicate very much about the comfort-level of her home. Barira was a slave whom Aisha bought for nine ounces of silver (about £1,800) with the specific goal of immediate manumission. As it happened, Barira had nowhere else to go, so she chose to stay with Aisha as a domestic maid.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:181; {{Bukhari|3|47|752}}.</ref> Muhammad put up the silver, which only proves that (largely through the successes of his wars and robberies<ref>For the booty from his battles, see Guillaume/Ishaq 324, 326-327, 438, 466; {{Tabari|7|p. 87}}.</ref>) he by now had some money in his coffer. But he spent his money on arming his warriors,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> bribing the double-minded<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 594-597</ref> or assisting the poor<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521.</ref> (which included such acts as manumitting slaves). According to Aisha, it did not translate to food for his household. “The Prophet of Allah liked three worldly objects – perfume, women and food … He obtained women and perfumes but he did not get food.”<ref>Ibn Saad, ''Tabaqat'' 1:2:90:4</ref> The servant Barira was an extra mouth for Muhammad to feed, and she must have been as hungry as her young mistress.

After the conquest of Khaybar in July 628, Muhammad was no longer poor, and Aisha was granted a share of the revenues.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 521-523.</ref> She hoped that “at last we will eat our fill of dates.”<ref>{{Bukhari|5|59|547}}. See also {{Muslim|9|3506}} and {{Muslim|9|3510}}, dating from this period.</ref> But if her rations improved, she did not remember it afterwards, so the majority of her sacks of wheat and dates must have been sold for cash or distributed to the poor. On the day Muhammad died, he was “King” of all Arabia, but Aisha’s barrel contained only one handful of barley.<ref>{{Muslim|42|7091}}; Jalalayn’s commentary on Q93:8.</ref>

===See Also===

*[[Qur'an, Hadith and Scholars:Aisha]] (''primary and early sources about Aisha'')
*[[Aisha Age of Consummation|Aisha's Age of Consummation]]
*[[Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aishas Age|Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aisha's Age]]
*[[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha]]
*[[Aisha and Puberty]]
*[[A Refutation of 'The Islamophobe's Glass House']]
*[[Rejecting Dr David Lieperts Aisha Was Older Apologetic Myth|Rejecting Dr. David Liepert's "Aisha Was Older" Apologetic Myth]] ''(Essay)''
*[[Islam and Pedophilia]] ''(Core Article)''
*[[Forced Marriage]]
*[[Muhammad's Wives]] (''Hub Page'')
*[[Aisha (Farsideology)]] (''satire'')

===References===
{{reflist}}