Ages of Muhammads Wives at Marriage: Difference between revisions

''By Petra MacDonald''

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What this highlights is that terms like “middle-aged” and “elderly” are subjective. They do not give precise information about how old the women were. Rather than debate what the words “middle-aged” and “elderly” ought to mean, we will consult the early Muslim sources and calculate the age of each wife on the day she married Muhammad.

The Islamic year consists of twelve lunar cycles and hence it is 354 or 355 days long. This means it is quite difficult to calculate comparative dates. For example:

A further complication is that nobody is certain that the pre-''Hijri'' year was exactly the same as the Muslim year that was standardised after the ''Hijra''. However, Muhammad complained about the custom of adding an intercalary month, which was probably a Medinan practice introduced by the Jews.<ref>See [http://www.jewishencyclopedia.com/articles/3920-calendar-history-of#anchor4/ “Calendar, History of”] in Funk & Wagnalls (1906). ''Jewish Encyclopaedia''. New York: Author.</ref> The fact that he abolished intercalary months<ref>{{Quran-range|9|36|37}}.</ref> suggests that no such practice had been known in Mecca and that the old Meccan year was much the same as the later Islamic year.

The discussion about Khadijah’s age does not arouse the type of anger, defensiveness and sheer deceit that surrounds the discussion of Aisha’s age. Nobody denies that Khadijah married Muhammad as a very willing adult. Nevertheless, the traditional view of her age is probably wrong, and many people are uncomfortable with the news that their traditions are wrong.

Hakim was Khadijah’s nephew.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 160</ref> Since children generally know the ages of their playmates, it is assumed that Hakim would have known the age of an aunt who was only two years older than himself. That is why his statement that she married Muhammad when she was 40 is usually accepted as true. However, there are problems with Hakim’s assertion.

The first problem is that Hakim claimed his own age to be 120.<ref>{{Muslim|10|3662}}; {{Tabari|39|p. 106}}.</ref> This is intrinsically questionable. To bolster his story, Hakim claimed to remember the episode when Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim vowed to sacrifice his son Abdullah to the god Hubal but was able to ransom him for 100 camels. He says this was about five years before Muhammad was born.<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 41, 106}}.</ref> But Hakim’s ability to spill out details that were already common knowledge does not prove he was an eyewitness to the event: he might well have heard the story from his parents.

If Hakim ibn Hizam was not literally 120, nor is it necessarily true that Khadijah (or any other person) was the age he claimed for her.

The second problem with Khadijah’s age is that there is a strong alternative tradition, one that originates from no less a person than Abdullah ibn Abbas. Ibn Abbas was the cousin who lived at Muhammad’s side through the final years in Medina.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 95}}.</ref> He was a great source of ''ahadith'' and his word would normally be accepted without question.<ref>See {{Tabari|39|pp. 54-57, 95}} for brief accolades. For a modern assessment of his contribution, see Siddiqi, M. Z. (2006). ''Hadith Literature: its origin, development, special features and criticism'', pp. 33-34. Kuala Lumpar: Islamic Book Trust.</ref> What is more, his mother was a close friend of Khadijah’s.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 201}}; Bewley/Saad 8:193.</ref> The only reason why Abdullah has been largely ignored on the subject of Khadijah is that he never knew her personally while Hakim ibn Hizam did.<ref>{{Tabari|39|55}}; Bewley/Saad 8:12; {{Tabari|39|p. 161}}.</ref> Abdullah ibn Abbas says:

If she was 50 at death, she was 25 at marriage. However, this is not really a third tradition about Khadijah’s age, for the context suggests that the number 50 is only an approximation. So the tradition that Khadijah was married at “about 25” is actually independent support for the tradition that she was in fact 28.

The third problem with Khadijah’s age is the common-sense consideration that she bore Muhammad six children over a period of ten years.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 83. Bewley/Saad 8:10.</ref> If she married him at 40, she was 50 by the time she gave birth to Fatima in 605.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:13.</ref> While this is not completely impossible, it is a sufficiently unusual achievement to cause us to pause and question the assertion.

Perhaps that was because Khadijah’s fertility was a commonplace for a woman of her age. Perhaps she was still in her thirties when she bore Muhammad’s children. Perhaps, when Fatima was weaned in 607,<ref>{{Tabari|39|166}}; see {{Quran|2|233}} and Guillaume/Ishaq 71 for two years as the customary duration of nursing.</ref> Khadijah was still a few months short of forty – and that was why her childbearing ceased.

If Khadijah was only two to three years older than Muhammad, this makes sense of a great deal. It explains how she was able to use her sex appeal was well as her money to attract him: her archetype was not so much “sugar mama” or “cougar” as “movie star”. It explains how she was able to produce six children in ten years and why she then stopped childbearing. It explains why Muhammad remained attracted to Khadijah for so long when, in later life, he was to reject older women.<ref>See Bewley/Saad 8:40, 111, 113; {{Tabari|9|pp. 139, 140}}.</ref> It explains why, after twenty years of marriage, he began thinking about younger women,<ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life2/chap4.htm/ Muir (1861) 2:141-144]. See also [http://www.muhammadanism.org/Canon_Sell/Quran/p024.htm/ Sell, E. (1923). ''The Historical Development of the Qur'an'', 4th Ed, pp. 25-26. London: People International.]</ref> for Khadijah would have been at that time menopausal and ''first'' losing her looks.

Far from being a “much older” woman, it appears that Khadijah was the only one of Muhammad’s wives who might fairly be deemed the same age as himself.

No contemporary historian gives Sawdah’s exact age, so we can only make an educated guess. The wedding date, however, is widely agreed.

Because Sawdah is described as “older” than her co-wives, this has led to extreme guesses that she was a bride of 65<ref>[http://www.islamforamal.com/contents-2/prophet-s-biography/prophets-wives/ Prophet’s Wives (Ummul Momineen)].</ref> or even 80<ref>[http://books.google.com.au/books?id=lJe3PNVAnK4C&dq=Sawdah+became+an+old+woman&q=Sawdah#v=snippet&q=Sawdah&f=false/ Al Ghoudairy, F. Why Did Prophet Muhammed Marry Aisha; the Young Girl, p. 24. Dare to read.]</ref> However, while trying to establish Sawdah’s age, we can immediately rule out any estimates that ignore three established facts.

When Khawla bint Hakim brought Muhammad’s marriage proposal to Sawdah:

{{Quote|{{Tabari|9|p. 130}}.|Sawdah said, “I want you to go to my father and tell him about it.” Khawla states: he was a very old man and had stayed away from the pilgrimage. I went to him and greeted him with the pre-Islamic salutation and told him that Muhammad ibn Abdullah ibn Abdulmuttalib had sent me to ask for Sawdah’s hand in marriage. “A noble match,” he replied. “What does your friend say?” … [Muhammad] came and [Zamaa] married her to him.}}

{{Quote|Bewley/Saad 8:43.|Sawdah bint Zamaa died in Medina in Shawwal of 54, during the caliphate of Muawiya.}}

This date is between 11 September and 9 October 674 – more than 54 years after the day when Sawdah married Muhammad. If she had lived to be 134, or even 114, someone would have commented! But if she was only about 40 on her wedding day, she must have survived to her mid-90s, which is impressive but plausible.

{{Quote|{{Bukhari|1|8|3451}}.|As [Sawdah] '''became old''', she had made over her day with Allah’s Messenger to Aisha. She said: “I have made over my day with you to Aisha.” So Allah’s Messenger allotted two days to Aisha, her own day and that of Sawdah.}}

If Sawdah was menopausal in 626, or perhaps 625, this suggests she was then aged about 45, making her around 40 when she married Muhammad.

When Muhammad married Sawdah in May 620, he was 49. It is possible that Sawdah was also about that age<ref>[http://www.themodernreligion.com/prophet/prophet_aisha.htm/ Ahmed, S. “Prophet Muhammad and Aisha Siddiqa.”]</ref> and that she lived to be over 100. But it is unlikely. Allowing that she was not yet menopausal and that she had a father living, she was probably closer to 40.

The age difference between Muhammad and Sawdah was not inappropriate for a middle-aged couple; but she was almost certainly the younger spouse. And we will state here that Sawdah was the oldest bride whom Muhammad ever married.

This question has already been adequately answered [[Refutation of Modern Muslim Apologetics Against Aisha's Age|here]] and [[Responses to Apologetics: Muhammad and Aisha|here]]. In sum, there is absolutely no reason to doubt Aisha’s own statements.

Aisha was the youngest bride whom Muhammad married. It does not follow that she was the youngest wife in the household. Towards the end of his life, Muhammad acquired a few women whose age in years was even younger than Aisha’s.

There is some discrepancy about Hafsah’s exact age but there is no doubt at all concerning her approximate age.

It does not really matter whether Hafsah was 19 or 17. The important points are that (1) she was biologically a woman and not a child, but (2) she was a ''young'' woman, while Muhammad was biologically old enough to be her grandfather.

Zaynab’s life is not well documented, which has led to guessing about her age.

Zaynab married five times.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bewley/Saad 8:82; {{Tabari|9|p. 138}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 163-614}}.</ref> Her fifth choice, it seems, fell on a high-status and already-married man old enough to be her father.

The data about Hind (Umm Salama) is precise, and there are no variant traditions.

It is very plausible that Hind was 28 when she married Muhammad, for her fourth child was then a newborn<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63-66.</ref> while her eldest daughter was about ten years of age.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 147.</ref>

There is dispute about Zaynab’s exact age, but there is no doubt about her approximate age.

Therefore we have to discard modern commentaries claiming that Zaynab was “in late middle age.”<ref>[http://www.ispi-usa.org/muhammad/appendix2.html/ Akhter, J. (2001). “The Prophet's Marriages and Wives”] in ''The Seven Phases of Prophet Muhammad's Life''. Chicago: ISPI.</ref> While the Arabs might not have considered her “a young woman,” this is relative. She was still young enough to have been Muhammad’s daughter.

Juwayriyah’s age is only mildly controversial.

The theme is becoming repetitive: Juwayriyah was young enough to be Muhammad’s granddaughter.

Safiyah gives us unusual precision, for it appears that she knew her age to the month.

Safiyah was yet another bride who was young enough to be Muhammad’s granddaughter.

It is said, citing ''Sunan Nasa’i'' vol. 1 book 1 #60 p. 127, that Ramlah (Umm Habiba) was 23 years younger than Muhammad.<ref>[http://www.muslimhope.com/WhyDidMohammedGetSoManyWives.htm/ “Why Did Mohammed Get So Many Wives?”] See also [http://www.prophetmuhammadforall.org/webfiles/downloads/wives/HUmmeHabiba.pdf/ “Hadrat Umm-e-Habiba (r.a)”] in ''Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) Guidance for Soul Satisfaction''.</ref> Since he was born in 53 BH, this would place her birth in 30 BH (9 June 593 - 28 May 594). Unfortunately I have not been able to verify this citation, though it is in broad agreement with the other sources.

Ramlah was young enough to be Muhammad’s daughter.

There are two traditions about Maymunah, neither of which makes very much sense.

Sir William Muir’s unsourced comment that “Maymunah is said to have been at this time 51 years of age”<ref>[http://www.answering-islam.org/Books/Muir/Life4/chap22.htm/ Muir, W. (1861). ''The Life of Mahomet'' vol. 4 p. 89. London: Smith, Elder & Co.]</ref> is thus wide of the mark.

Mulaykah’s exact age is not given, but there is a clue in this statement.

While this is only a guess, we were also only guessing about Sawdah. By the time Muhammad married Mulaykah, Aisha had become a just-nubile 16. Although Mulaykah was an older bride, she was almost certainly younger in years than Aisha.

Asma’s age is unknown but her age-range is clearly implied.

Asma was once again young enough to be Muhammad’s granddaughter.

Amrah’s age is not stated anywhere. However, we do know the approximate age of her first husband.

These two concubines were presumably selected for their looks and were presumably young. But presumption is not fact. We do not know their ages and so we have omitted them from the calculation.

We can now calculate the mean age of 14 of Muhammad’s wives at the time he married them.

The mean age of Muhammad’s brides was about '''24½ years'''. Even by Arab standards, a woman of 24 was not quite “middle-aged”.

We can also calculate Muhammad’s mean age as a bridegroom. Here is his age when he consummated each of these marriages.