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Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>
Zaynab bint Jahsh was Muhammad’s seventh wife.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref>


Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari||8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.
Her original name had been ''Barrah'' (“virtuous”) but Muhammad Muhammad disliked this name because “It makes her sound as if she is claiming to be virtuous.”<ref>{{Muslim|25|5335}}.</ref> He renamed her ''Zaynab'',<ref>{{Bukhari|1|8|212}}; {{Abudawud|3|4935}}.</ref> which literally means “father’s ornament”, but is also the name of a flower.


===Background===
===Background===


Her father was Jahsh ibn Riyab of the Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe. The Asad ibn Khuzayma were a Bedouin tribe from eastern Arabia.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> Jahsh's father Riyab immigrated to Mecca in search of the settled lifestyle and requested an alliance with the Quraysh. The Asad clan offered him an alliance "and he gladly joined them as ''hali''." Later it was said that the Asad were "a wretched branch of the Quraysh". Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya. The Umayyads were the most powerful clan in Mecca. Kister.<ref></ref> Zaynab was regarded as an honorary Umayyad.
Zaynab’s grandfather was Riyab ibn Yaamur, a Bedouin from the tribe of Asad ibn Khuzayma.<ref>Note. The Asad ibn Khuzayma tribe should not be confused with the Asad clan of the Quraysh. The latter were a single family who lived in Mecca, i.e., the descendants of Asad ibn Abduluzza, of whom Khadijah was one.</ref> He immigrated to Mecca and requested an alliance with the Quraysh, apparently because he desired their assistance in a quarrel with the Khuza'a. Khadijah's grandfather, Asad ibn Abduluzza, responded, “and he gladly joined them as ''hali'' [ally on equal terms].” But the Meccans later told him that the Asad were “a wretched branch of the Quraysh”. Riyab then broke this alliance and formed one with the Umayya, who were the most powerful clan in Mecca.<ref>Kister, M. J. (1990). On Strangers and Allies in Mecca. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 13'', 113-154.</ref> Hence Riyab's children and grandchildren were regarded as honorary Umayyads.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:170-172 lists some of Riyab's clan who lived in Mecca. Some were his biological family but others may have been more loosely attached.</ref>


Her mother was Umama bint Abdulmuttalib ibn Hashim, who was Muhammad’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> so Muhammad had known her all her life.
Riyab's son Jahsh married Umama bint Abdulmuttalib, who was Muhammad’s aunt;<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref> hence their children were his first cousins. They had six children, although the birth-order of the daughters is not certain.


Zaynab was born c. 590 in Mecca.
# Abd, the first of the sons, was born blind. "He could find his way around Mecca without a guide." He was a poet. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter and in later life he was always known by his ''kunya'' Abu Ahmad.
 
# Abdullah was the second son. He married Zaynab b Khuzayma (who later married Muhammad). He also married Fatima b Abi Hubaysh, by whom he had one son. He died at Uhud on 22 March 625.
She had five siblings.
# Zaynab was born c. 590.
 
# Ubaydullah ("little Abdullah") was the third son. He was a spiritual seeker. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older. He died in Abyssinia in late 627.
Abu Ahmed, the eldest, was a blind poet. "He could find his way around Mecca without a guide." He married Abu Sufyan's daughter.
# Habibah (also known as Umm Habib) married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.
 
# Hamnah was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, who died at Uhud in March 625. She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.
Abdullah was the second brother. He married Zaynab b Khuzayma (who later married Mohammed). He also married Fatima b Abi XXXXX, by whom he had one son. He died at Uhud on 22 March 625.
 
Ubaydullah ("little Abdullah") was the third brother. He was a spiritual seeker. He married Abu Sufyan's daughter. She was born c. 594, so he was presumably this age or a little older.


The birth-order of the daughters is not known.
The birth-order of the daughters is not known.
It is possible that Zaynab remembered Muhammad’s wedding to Khadijah, which took place when she was about five years old.


Habibah (also known as Umm Habib) married the wealthy merchant Abdulrahman ibn Awf. He was one of the earliest converts to Islam. Habiba was childless. She had a bleeding disorder.
Hamnah was probably the youngest child. Her two husbands were born in 594 and 595, so she was probably not older than this. She married Masood ibn Umayr, who died at Uhud in March 625. She was almost immediately remarried to Talha ibn Ubaydullah.


===First Marriage===
===First Marriage===
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Zaynab was a widow by the time she emigrated to Medina under the protection of her brother Abdullah. This was in late 620 or 621, when she was about 30.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215.</ref>
Zaynab was a widow by the time she emigrated to Medina under the protection of her brother Abdullah. This was in late 620 or 621, when she was about 30.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 215.</ref>
When the Banu Jahsh made their hijra to Medina, Abu Sufyan sold their houses and appropriated for himself the proceeds of the transaction.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> One of the sons of Jahsh complained of this iniquity, stressing that "others" (ie, other branches of Quraysh - K) wanted to affiliate them as allies, but the Banu Jahsh preferred an alliance with Abu Sufyan.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref> 'Abel al-Malik inquired who it was who had offered the Banu Jahsh the alliance and 'Urwa b. al-Zubayr said that his clan had done so, but that Banu Jahsh had preferred to conclude an alliance with Abu Sufyan.<ref>Kister (1990).</ref>


===Second Marriage===
===Second Marriage===
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===References===
===References===
{{reflist}}
{{reflist}}
==Zaynab bint Jahsh==
He married Umayma bint Abdulmuttalib, a sister of Muhammad’s father.<ref></ref> Their six children were therefore Muhammad’s first cousins.
Their eldest son, Abd, was born blind. He knew his way around every corner of Mecca.<ref></ref>  He was a poet.<ref></ref>  He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter, NAME, and had two sons, after which he was always known by his ''kunya'', Abu Ahmad.<ref></ref> The second son was Abdullah.<ref></ref> Their third son, Ubaydullah, was a spiritual seeker. He came under the influence of Zayd ibn Amr and became a monotheist. He married Abu Sufyan’s daughter Ramla.<ref></ref>
Zaynab was born c. 590,<ref></ref> so she knew Muhammad all her life. She would have been about five years old when he married Khadijah.<ref></ref> Zaynab had two sisters. Umm Habib married Abdulrahman ibn Awf, a wealthy merchant from the Zuhra clan. Hamna, who appears to have been the youngest of the six siblings,<ref>Hamna’s two husbands were both younger than Zaynab and about the same age as Ubaydullah’s wife. Beyond this clue, the birth-order of the three sisters is not known.</ref> married Musab ibn Umayr, a blue-eyed rich boy from the Abduldar clan.
===First Marriage===
Zaynab’s married a respectable man from the Quraysh tribe.<ref></ref>  Strangely, nothing else is known about her husband, not even his name. This absence of information is unlikely to indicate that there was anything “embarrassing” about Zaynab’s first marriage. Not very much embarrassed the early Muslim historians; certainly they did not care whether the previous spouses of Muhammad’s wives had been friends, foes or neutral. Rather, it indicates that the chroniclers had no record of this man’s name because nobody ever talked about him. Although he must have been known to the many Umayyads who afterwards passed on traditions about Muhammad, it appears that he was not important to any of them.
We can make three educated guesses about Zaynab’s married life. The first is that her husband was approved by Abu Sufyan. He had allowed, or even arranged, very respectable marriages for all her siblings,<ref></ref> and there is no reason why Zaynab should have been the exception. The man was probably not from the Umayya clan, as in this case Zaynab would have mentioned it,<ref>In {{Tabari|8|p. 1}}, her insistence that her husband had been a Quraysh is clearly meant to emphasise his high social status. She did not assert that he had been from a prestigious clan such as Umayya or Makhzum or Hashim, so presumably he was from one of the humbler families.</ref> but he was nevertheless of some standing in the community.
The second guess is that they had a child. Zaynab was occasionally known as “Umm Al-Hakam,”<ref></ref> literally “Mother of the Judge”. There is nothing in her biography that indicates she had any kind of reputation for expertise on matters of law, government or judgment, so it is unlikely to have been a by-name. It is more likely that the name was a ''kunya'' because she had actually given birth to a son named Al-Hakam. Since she certainly had no children from her subsequent marriages,<ref></ref> this must have been her first husband’s child. However, Zaynab’s ''kunya'' was not used very often, and there is no further mention of the child, so Al-Hakam most likely died in infancy.
The third guess is that they were leather-workers. Zaynab was skilled at crafts. She is variously mentioned as tanning<ref></ref> and crafting leather<ref></ref> and dyeing<ref></ref> and tailoring<ref></ref> textiles. It is also said that she pierced pearls.<ref></ref> Her social rank meant that she did not need to work for her living, and there is no indication that any of her siblings had such skills. This suggests that it was her husband’s family who were the leather-workers and that Zaynab learned the craft from them.
===Islam===
Zaynab was about 20 years old when her cousin Muhammad declared himself a prophet.<ref></ref> Her brother Abdullah was one of the earliest converts,<ref></ref> and he had soon converted his father and siblings.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s mother was not converted.<ref></ref> As for her husband, if he had been a Muslim, this would surely have been noted on the lists of early converts; since the lists do not include anyone who could have been plausibly married to Zaynab, we can assume that he remained a pagan.<ref>It is specifically noted that the early Muslims Sakhran ibn Amr, Abdullah ibn Abdulasad and Ubaydullah ibn Jahsh were married to women who later married Muhammad. There is no such notice regarding Zaynab.</ref>
In 615 Zaynab’s father and brothers joined the emigration to Abyssinia. Abu Ahmad and Ubaydullah took their wives and children with them, but Abdullah and his father travelled alone.<ref></ref> As Umayma was not a Muslim and as she was under the protection of both Abu Sufyan and her brother Abu Talib, she had no reason to fear the Meccans. But the fact that she did not accompany her husband indicates something else: that her relationship with him was strained to the point that they no longer desired one another’s society. As it happened, Jahsh ibn Riyab never returned to Mecca. He travelled eastwards to preach Islam to whoever would listen.<ref></ref> It is even claimed that he reached China and that the Muslim residents of western China are descended from his converts.<ref></ref>
Abu Ahmad and Abdullah returned to Mecca in 619,<ref></ref> but Ubaydullah remained in Abyssinia.
From mid-620 Muhammad urged the Muslims to emigrate to Medina.<ref></ref> Zaynab’s brother Abdullah was one of the first to heed this call, probably in early 621. By this time Zaynab was a widow, although there is no information about how or when her husband had died. She was among those who accompanied Abdullah to Medina.<ref>Tabari 39:180.</ref>
Although it was a large party of over twenty people, they appear to have left in something of a hurry, for Abdullah was one of only three emigrants who did not liquidise his assets before departing from Mecca.<ref></ref> When the Meccans were certain that the Jahsh clan would not return, Abu Sufyan took possession of their house.<ref></ref> Abdullah was angry about this.<ref></ref> Abu Sufyan’s side of the story does not survive, but it is quite likely that he had some sort of legal right over the property, probably because he had originally lent, leased or given it to the Jahshites. By allying so openly with Muhammad, Abdullah had snubbed Abu Sufyan’s forty years of friendship and forfeited his protection, so few Meccans would have disputed Abu Sufyan’s right to repossess a house that had probably belonged to him originally.
The family settled in Medina. Zaynab probably lived with Abdullah, who also had a wife named Fatima bint Abi Hubaysh and a young son named Muhammad.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:173</ref>
Muhammad arrived in September 622.<ref></ref> He built the mosque;<ref></ref> he debated with the Jews;<ref></ref> and he raided the merchant-caravans of the Meccans, an enterprise in which Abdullah was quite active.<ref></ref>
===Second Marriage===
At some stage, it is said, Zaynab proposed herself to Muhammad as a wife and offered not to take any dower.<ref>It is Ibn Hisham (note 918) who qualifies this story with the term “it is said.” In the light of what follows, however, it seems highly likely that the story is true.</ref> Muhammad declined this invitation. Early in 625 he visited Abdullah saying he had a marriage proposal for Zaynab.<ref></ref> Because of the uncertain chronology, it is not clear whether this was the occasion when Zaynab offered herself to Muhammad dower-free or whether this visit occurred later and she assumed he had changed his mind. Either way, she and her brother assumed that Muhammad now wanted to marry her.
They were displeased to discover that Muhammad was not proposing on his own behalf at all. He did not want to marry Zaynab. He was proposing that she marry his adopted son Zayd. Further, it was about this time that he married both Hafsa bint Umar and Zaynab bint Khuzayma. It was also at this time that he ruled that four wives was the maximum number. Zaynab could not have been more thoroughly rejected.
====Zayd’s Background====
Zayd was born into the Udhra tribe c. 581. <ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}} states that he was “ten years younger than Muhammad.” It also states an alternative tradition that he died in September 629 “at the age of fifty-five,” giving him a birthdate of 576. The latter sounds less plausible since Muhammad adopted him as a son.</ref> He was kidnapped by slave-traders as a small child and eventually came into the possession of Khadijah. She gave him to Muhammad as a wedding present in 595. Zayd wrote a poem about his circumstances and sent it to his original family. They came looking for him in Mecca and offered to pay any price to redeem him. But Zayd preferred to remain with Muhammad. Muhammad manumitted Zayd and adopted him as his son, and Zayd’s biological family departed in the knowledge that he was happy.
In the twenty years since then, Zayd had been constantly at Muhammad’s side. He is described as “a short, flat-nosed man, of a very dark brown skin” and “one of the famous archers among the Prophet’s Companions”.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 10}}.</ref> He was the first adult male to become a Muslim.
Muhammad had a habit of arranging marriages for Zayd. Before Islam Muhammad wanted to ally with his uncle, Abu Lahab ibn Abdulmuttalib. He married two of his daughters to Abu Lahab’s sons, while Abu Lahab’s daughter Durrah married Zayd. In late 610 or 611 Zayd took as a second wife Muhammad’s freedwoman Baraka.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> They had a son, Usama, in 612.<ref>Usama was “twenty years old when the Prophet died,” ({{Tabari|39|pp. 65, 99}}) setting his earliest possible birth-date at February 612. He was old enough to fight at the Trench (REF), so his latest possible birth-date was August 612.</ref> Baraka must have been fifteen years older than Zayd<ref>In 577 she was old enough to take care of the newly orphaned six-year-old Muhammad (REF). Although she is described as his “nurse” ({{Tabari|39|p. 65}}) she may have been only four or five years older than her charge, as she was still young enough to bear a son in 612 and to live on until c. 645 (Bewley/Saad 8:159).</ref> and she is said to have been ugly.<ref></ref> After 613 Muhammad quarrelled with his uncle,<ref></ref> so Abu Lahab instructed his sons to divorce Muhammad’s daughters, and Zayd divorced Durrah.<ref></ref>
In 614 Baraka delivered a message to Muhammad under difficult circumstances,<ref></ref> and he commended her with the words, “The man who wants to marry a woman of Paradise should marry Baraka!”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:157.</ref> Since Zayd and Baraka were already married at this point, the accolade was not recommending Baraka as a future wife but rather had the force of reminding Zayd of his good fortune. In pointed contrast to Durrah bint Abi Lahab, the older, plainer and lower-born Baraka had shown herself a true Muslim.
Although Muhammad was fond of Baraka, whom he addressed as “Mother,”<ref>Bewley/Saad 157.</ref> he seems to have believed that Zayd could do better. In 621 he claimed to have miraculously visited Paradise.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 184-187.</ref> Among the marvels that he reported seeing there was “a damsel with dark red lips. I asked her to whom she belonged, for she pleased me much when I saw her, and she told me ‘Zayd ibn Haritha.’” So he gave Zayd the “good news” about her.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 186.</ref> After the ''Hijra'' Zayd married a Medinan widow named Humayma bint Sayfi.<ref>Bewley/Saad 264. She is almost certainly the same person as the “Umm Mubashshir” on p. 295.</ref> Her first husband had been a “chief and senior” in the Khazraj tribe,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 202.</ref> and she owned a date-orchard.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:295.</ref>
====Reasons for the Marriage====
Muhammad never stated exactly why he wanted Zaynab to marry Zayd, but it is reasonable to assume that it was with Zayd’s full cooperation. Zaynab was “a perfect-looking woman,” fair-skinned and shapely.<ref>Qurtubi’s Commentary on Q33:37</ref> The description of her “fine black hair” seems to have been invented by an imaginative Orientalist,<ref></ref> but it is not implausible.
Zaynab declined “because I am a widow of Quraysh.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:72.</ref> Abdullah confirmed that Zayd – a black man and a former slave – was simply not good enough for Zaynab’s aristocratic ambitions.<ref>Q33:36; Tabari 39: 6-10, 180; ''Tafsir Al-Jalalayn''.</ref> While it was does not reflect well on Zaynab or Abdullah that they would reject a suitor for such shallow reasons, this does not alter the principle that Zaynab had the right to say no. If she did not wish to marry Zayd, her reason was nobody else’s business.
The matter might have ended there, for Muhammad had always claimed that a woman should not be forced into marriage.<ref>Bukhari 62:67; 86:98.</ref>
Muhammad announced a revelation from Allah: “When Allah and His Messenger have decided a matter, it is not fitting for a Believer to decide on any alternatives; anyone who disobeys Allah and His Messenger is certainly on a very wrong Path.”<ref>Q33:36.</ref>
It was at about this time that Abdullah was killed at the Battle of Uhud.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607. The exact date of Zaynab’s marriage to Zayd is not recorded.</ref> This might have been the real reason that Zaynab eventually became persuadable. A few days later, she received a visit from Hind’s daughter Zaynab, who would have been about nine years old.<ref>The hadith does not state which one of Zaynab’s brothers had just died. However, it cannot have been Abu Ahmed, who outlived her; and it is unlikely that she was much distressed by the death of Ubaydullah, whom the family had disowned.</ref>
It is not surprising that Zaynab was on visiting terms with Hind and her daughter, for Zaynab’s aunt had been Hind’s stepmother;<ref></ref> they would have been acquainted all their lives, even before they both counted among the earliest converts to Islam.
The prohibition on displays of grief must have been hard for bereaved mothers, sisters and daughters. The death of Abdullah was significant for Zaynab because she lost her chief protector.
Zaynab submitted to the spiritual blackmail and married Zayd.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; ‘‘Tafsir Al-Jalalayn’’.</ref>
All was quiet for a couple of years.
===Third Marriage===
====Reasons for the Divorce====
Around November 626 Muhammad came to visit Zayd. A gust of wind blew aside the hairskin curtain that served as his front door, giving Muhammad a full view of Zaynab dressed only in her shift.<ref>Majlisi, in ''Hayat al-Qulub'', states that she was in the bath. This detail must be taken with caution, as Majlisi was writing 1100 years after the event and the English translation does not cite his source. However, most of Majlisi’s anecdotes can be traced to authentic early sources. Zaynab might well have been wearing her shift in the bath.</ref> She hastily pulled on an over-gown, advising Muhammad that Zayd was not at home but he was welcome to visit anyway. Muhammad was too stunned by Zaynab’s enticing movements to stir from the spot, but he gasped out, “Praise be to Allah, who turns around hearts!”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> By the time Zaynab was properly dressed, Muhammad had departed – completely and permanently obsessed with her.
Some apologists claim this story cannot be true because Muhammad had known Zaynab all her life and had seen her face thousands of times without being attracted to her.<ref></ref> These people have missed the point. It was not Zaynab’s ''face'' that attracted Muhammad. His feelings for her changed the first time he saw her ''below the neck''.
Zayd offered to divorce Zaynab so that Muhammad could marry her. Muhammad discouraged this<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref> but his secret desire for his daughter-in-law found its way into the Qur’an: “Thou didst hide in thy mind what Allah was about to reveal.”<ref>Q33:37; Bukhari 60:310.</ref> Aisha said it was proof of Muhammad’s honesty that he did not delete this embarrassing verse from the Qur’an altogether.<ref>Bukhari 93:516.</ref>
Zaynab realised that she had a chance of escaping her unhappy marriage and decided to help matters along. She became aloof and haughty to Zayd, making cutting remarks about his lowly birth and ugly face and shutting him out of the bedroom.<ref>Tabari 8:2; Qurtubi on Q33:37-38.</ref> This spiteful behaviour has to be seen in its context. Zayd had selfishly insisted on marrying Zaynab even after he knew full well that she did not want him. In this set-up, Zaynab’s only realistic chance of reclaiming her rights was the passive-aggressive route. Her strategy worked. Zayd realised he would never have a happy life with this resentful woman. He gave in and divorced her.<ref>Bukhari 93:516; Tabari 39:181.</ref>
====Subsequent Career of Zayd====
Muhammad compensated Zayd by finding him new wives. He married Umm Kulthum bint Uqba in 628 at Muhammad’s order.<ref></ref> She bore him two children, probably twins, but this marriage also ended in divorce.<ref></ref> Zayd then married Khadijah’s niece, Hind bint Al-Awwam,<ref></ref> while Umm Kulthum married Hind’s brother Al-Zubayr. Umm Kulthum was unhappy with Al-Zubayr, who was violent, and she engineered a divorce from him.<ref></ref> It is not known whether Zayd was happy with Hind.
====Marriage to Muhammad====
There were still two further obstacles before Zaynab could marry Muhammad. One was that he already had four wives and he had insisted to his disciples that four was the maximum.<ref></ref> When men with more than four wives became Muslims, he made them divorce the extras, although they were allowed to choose which four they would keep.<ref>Abu Dawud 12:2233; Tirmizi 945.</ref> Having pledged not to abandon the faithful Sawda,<ref></ref> Muhammad produced a new revelation from Allah that allowed him to marry as many women as he liked.<ref>Q33:50.</ref>
The second problem was that Zaynab was Muhammad’s daughter-in-law, and the Arabs considered a daughter-in-law almost as taboo as a biological daughter. So Allah had to send down another revelation that abolished adoption, therefore ruling that Zayd had never been his son and Zaynab had never been his daughter-in-law.<ref>Q33:37, 40; see also Ibn Kathir’s commentary.</ref> Muslims have not adopted children since that day.
On the same day Zaynab’s waiting-period ended, Muhammad fell into a prophetic trance, then happily announced to Aisha: “Someone must go to tell Zaynab the good news! Allah from above has just married her to me!” While Aisha was “distressed by both immediate and potential troubles, having heard of Zaynab’s beauty,”<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> the divorced and disinherited Zayd was dispatched as messenger. He found Zaynab kneading bread, and her face was so radiant that he could not look at her while he delivered Allah’s message.<ref>Muslim 8:3330.</ref>
===Tetragyny Ends===
Muhammad’s marriage to Zaynab marked the end of all restraint or common sense in his married life. While other men were still required to restrict themselves to four wives only, Muhammad acquired a dozen extra women, and he unsuccessfully courted several more. He never tried to justify why he “needed” to marry all these extra women. He simply said that Allah permitted it because he was the Prophet, and therefore ordinary restrictions did not apply to him.
As for intangibles like love, it was no secret that his favourite wives were Aisha, Zaynab, Hind and Hafsa<ref></ref> – in that order<ref></ref> – and that his least-favourite was Sawda. Although he was prone to sudden infatuations, he developed no deep or long-term feelings for any of the dozen women whom he acquired after Zaynab.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Ibn Saad, ‘‘Tabaqat’’ 8:166; Zamakhshari’s commentary on Q33:51.</ref>
There is something ironic about Muhammad’s lifelong assertion that four wives were ideal. Although he broke his own rule, by the end of his life he found that there were exactly four women whom he still “loved”. As a double irony, more discerning moralists have asserted that one wife is ideal.<ref>E.g., I Timothy 3:1.</ref> Muhammad unwittingly agreed, for he did not love any of his four favourites as much as he had once loved Khadijah.<ref></ref>
====The Wedding====
Muhammad married Zaynab on 26 March 627 when he was 56 and she was about 37.<ref>Tabari 39:181.</ref> The Qur’an refers to her story: “So when Zayd had done as he wished in divorcing her, We married her to you.”<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; Bukhari 93:516; Muslim 1:338 f 358.</ref>
Perhaps feeling the need to face down the social criticism,<ref>Tabari 39:9</ref> Muhammad hosted for Zaynab the most lavish wedding banquet that he ever gave: he slaughtered a sheep and served a huge dish of date pudding. Seventy guests ate until they were stuffed and there was food left over.<ref>Bukhari 62:84, 92, 97, 100; Muslim 8:3331, 3328; Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:76.</ref> Two of the wedding guests sat around talking long after Muhammad gestured that the party was over. Allah had to send down a special revelation: “O Believers! Do not come to dinner in the Prophet’s houses without an invitation; do not arrive before the meal is ready, and do not sit around talking after you have eaten. This annoys the Prophet; he is too shy to ask you to leave, but Allah is not shy of telling the truth...”<ref> Q33:53; Bukhari 60:314, 315, 316, 317; 62:84, 92; 65:375; 74:256, 288; Muslim 8:3333, 3334, 3336.</ref>
===The Order of the Veil===
The marriage to Zaynab marked a complete transformation in the lifestyle of Muhammad’s wives. When the guests at Zaynab’s wedding banquet finally left, Muhammad entered her house, but before his faithful page Anas had time to set foot across the threshold, Muhammad abruptly drew the curtain and proclaimed a revelation.<ref>Bukhari 62:95. See also Bukhari 74:255.</ref> Allah commanded that there must always be a curtain between Muhammad’s wives and all other men. If the women left the house, they must wear veils.<ref>Q 33:55, 59.</ref>
Umar was still not satisfied. He wanted women to be shut up indoors and he resented that Muhammad let his wives go outdoors for any reason. Umar went to spy on the outdoor toilets (there were no indoor toilets because Arabs despised such soft living). Although Muhammad’s wives now wore full face-veils, he easily recognised Sawda because she was so tall. He shouted: “Caught you, Sawda! Anyone can recognise you – think of a new way to hide yourself when you go out.” In agonies of embarrassment, Sawda ran to complain to Muhammad, who immediately produced a new revelation that gave his wives permission to go to the toilet.<ref> Bukhari 60:318; Muslim 26:5395, 5396.</ref>
Muhammad was more reasonable than Umar, but from that day forward, his wives lived behind a curtain. If they did venture outdoors they must be dressed so that their faces and other distinguishing features were hidden. (We are not told how Sawda disguised her height.) Discussions with men must be strictly business only, and a man who visited a wife of Muhammad must only speak to her if a curtain hung between them. Only women, close relatives and slaves might penetrate the curtain.<ref>Q33:53, 55.</ref> While there was no specific command that other women should hide themselves in the same way, they were most probably encouraged to follow the example of the Prophet’s wives. Muhammad warned the whole congregation that Allah did not accept the prayers of an unveiled woman.<ref>Abu Dawud 2:0641.</ref>
Back in the 590s, Khadijah had made her wealth by bartering in the open market, her name and face on open display. After 627 such a lifestyle became impossible for a respectable Muslim woman. Women were not precluded from money-making activities as such – indeed, Zaynab’s cottage business in leather goods was prospering nicely – but those who wished to work must manage their business in ways that did not involve interacting with men. Muslim men were warned not to harass the respectable veiled women whom they might meet around town: the implication was that unveiled women were fair game.<ref>Q33:59.</ref>
===Relationship with Muhammad===
Muhammad remained strongly attracted to Zaynab for the rest of his life; she was second only to Aisha in his love.<ref>Bukhari 48:829, 47:755; 48:829; 59:462; 60:274, 281; Muslim 31:5984; 37:6673; Bewley/Saad 8:166.</ref> She was a woman of grand passions: fervent in prayer, loyal to her family and generous in charity. She was quick-tempered and devastatingly honest, but she was also quick to recover her good mood.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref> She had creative flair and had always earned her living as a tanner, leather-worker, bead-piercer and dressmaker.<ref>Muslim 8:3240; Bewley/Saad 8:81-82.</ref> She continued this work for the rest of her life, selling her products and giving away all the profits to charity.<ref>Bewley/Ibn Saad 8:74, 77</ref>
It is said that he built her an attic to serve as her workroom. Her house was different from the first four, built only of palm-branches and not of unbaked bricks.
Once when Zaynab was busy tanning a hide, Muhammad burst into her workroom and demanded sex immediately. Afterwards he explained that he had just been tempted by the sight of an attractive woman, but by slaking his lust on his wife, he had repelled the temptation.<ref>Muslim 8:3240. See also: Muslim 8:3241.</ref> Muhammad did not always approve of Zaynab’s craft-work. One day he glanced through her door and frowned with disapproval when he saw that she was dyeing her clothes with red ochre. Zaynab understood the message, so she rinsed the garments until all the redness had run out.<ref>Abu Dawud 32:4060.</ref>
===Co-Wives===
Zaynab used to boast in front of her co-wives: “Your marriages were contracted by your families, but mine was contracted by Allah in the seven Heavens. I am closer kin to the Prophet than any of you, and my clan is the noblest of all the Quraysh.”<ref>Bukhari 93:516, 517; Tabari 39:182.</ref> Such an attitude was calculated to offend the other wives. The only one who refused to be alienated was Hind. They probably had a longstanding relationship, as Hind’s stepmother was Zaynab’s aunt,<ref>Tabari 39:112.</ref> and they remained friends for the rest of their lives.<ref></ref>
Aisha frankly admitted that from this point, the household was divided into two parties. Aisha was the leader of one group, always supported by Hafsa and Sawda, while Hind was allied to Zaynab<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref> and to Muhammad’s daughter Fatima.<ref>Fatima does not ever seem to have been friends with Aisha. Fatima’s husband Ali perceived Abu Bakr as a rival (REF) and he urged Muhammad to divorce Aisha (REF). After Muhammad died, Aisha supported her father’s decision not to give Fatima any inheritance (REF). So although Fatima had no stake in the sexual jealousies among the wives, it is probably fair to regard her as an honorary member of Hind’s and Zaynab’s party.</ref>
When the Muslims wanted to give a gift of luxury food to their Prophet, they would wait until Aisha’s rostered day and bring the present to her room. In a condition of scarcity, this favouritism was resented, and the wives sent Hind to plead that such gifts be shared out equally among all of them. Muhammad told Hind not to bother him about it, and she had to apologise for offending him. The wives then sent in Fatima, to whom Muhammad frankly admitted that Aisha was his favourite, so she ought to love Aisha too. Next the wives sent Zaynab, who spoke bluntly and directly before launching a barrage of verbal abuse at Aisha. Aisha retaliated with such deadly malice that in the end Zaynab was utterly silenced. Muhammad was proud of Aisha and declared: “She is truly the daughter of Abu Bakr!”<ref>Bukhari 47:755; Muslim 31:5984; Abu Dawud 41:4880.</ref>
Of course, the whole quarrel could have been averted if Muhammad had been satisfied with only one woman; or even if he had taken care to share out the food fairly among his multiple wives. As it was, Zaynab had to accept that not even she could compete with Aisha in Muhammad’s love. It was also established that it was not outspoken Zaynab, but tactful Hind, who was the real leader of their faction.
Nevertheless, when Zaynab had a real chance to destroy Aisha, she did not take it. When Aisha was accused of adultery, and Ali had already advised Muhammad to divorce her,<ref></ref> Muhammad asked Zaynab if she knew anything incriminating against Aisha. Zaynab’s own sister had been the chief rumour-monger;<ref></ref> there must have been a huge temptation for Zaynab to go along with the flow, oust her rival and reign supreme in Muhammad’s heart. However, either Zaynab was streetwise enough to recognise that attacking Aisha might well backfire; or else her fundamental honesty took over. She told Muhammad: “I will not lie. I have not heard or seen anything bad about Aisha. By Allah, I know only good about her.”<ref></ref>
This unbiased testimony may well have been the factor that convinced Muhammad that casting Aisha as an adulteress was simply not plausible and that he had nothing to gain from disgracing her. In saving Aisha, Zaynab had handed her own sister over to be flogged.<ref>Bukhari 59:462. See also Bukhari 48:829; 60:274; 60:281; Muslim 37:6673.</ref> Aisha and Zaynab never became friends, but Aisha was truly grateful for her rival’s honesty, and their relationship settled down to one of mutual respect.<ref>Muslim 31:5984.</ref>
===Widowhood===
During his final illness, Muhammad had told his wives that “my wife with the longest hand” would be the first to die after him. The wives measured their hands and confirmed that Sawda’s was the longest;<ref></ref> this cannot have surprised them as Sawda was strikingly tall.<ref></ref> It was not much of a prediction, since Sawda was the eldest of the wives<ref>She is the only one to be described as “an old woman,” i.e., post-menopausal, in Muhammad’s lifetime.</ref> and unhealthily obese.<ref></ref> Muhammad died on 8 June 632<ref></ref> when Zaynab was about 42 years old.
She never left Medina again.<ref></ref>
She died on a hot summer day in 641, aged about 51.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:80-81</ref>
Aisha wept when she heard the news. When she was asked why, a question indicating that everyone knew that she and Zaynab had not been friends, she replied, “She was a good woman.”<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:81</ref>
Zaynab was the first of Muhammad’s official<ref>Muhammad’s concubine, Mariya bint Shamoon, had died first of all in 637.</ref> widows to die, so his guess about the future had been wrong. The surviving wives then rationalised that the “longest hand” must have been a metaphor and that it probably referred to Zaynab’s generous almsgiving.<ref></ref>