Muhammad's Marriages: Difference between revisions

Hind was born into the wealthy Makhzum clan of the Quraysh, and her husband, Abdullah ibn Abdulasad, was a second cousin from the same clan.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 132}}.</ref> Since their family rejected them when they became Muslims,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 169, 170.</ref> it is not clear whether they were still wealthy when, ten years later, they arrived in Medina; but they owned the camels that transported them.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 213-214.</ref>

Abdullah died from battle wounds in November 625.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 175}}; Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Hind wanted to pledge never to remarry so that they might be reunited in Paradise; but the dying Abdullah would not accept the pledge.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:62.</ref> The very fact that Hind believed she would not want to remarry suggests that she was not worried about poverty. It is quite possible that Abdullah had some savings to leave to his widow. She was pregnant,<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:66: “When I gave birth to Zaynab, the Messenger of Allah came and proposed to me.” There is some confusion here, as both Hind's daughters appear to have been sometimes known as Zaynab, although the first was originally named Barrah and the second Durrah. Obviously, Hind is here referring to her younger daughter.</ref> so if she needed to generate extra income, perhaps she planned to hire herself out as a wet nurse. However, neither of these options was her main plan.

As soon as Hind was free to remarry (18 March 626)<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> she received a marriage-proposal from Abu Bakr. Then she received a proposal from Umar. Then she received a proposal from Muhammad. She refused all of them. Muhammad then came to visit in person.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> In Hind’s own words: “When my ''idda'' was over, Allah’s Messenger asked to come to see me '''while I was tanning a hide I had. I washed my hands clean of the tanning solution''' and asked him to come in ...”<ref>Ahmad ibn Hanbal, cited in Ibn Kathir, ''Al-Sira Al-Nabawiyya''. Translated by Le Gassick T. (2000). ''The Life of the Prophet'', p. 123. Reading, U.K.: Garnet Publishing.</ref> Like Sawdah, Hind was a tanner. Muhammad happened to call on her while she was in the very act of working to support her children, which suggests that she had long since established the routine on which they would all depend.

When Muhammad repeated his marriage-proposal, Hind gave him a string of reasons for why she wanted to refuse, and he left her house disappointed. Muhammad had to argue her out of her excuses and propose a third time before she finally accepted him.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:63.</ref> They were married on or before 6 April 626.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:61.</ref> Of course, this raises the question of whether Hind truly wanted to marry Muhammad or whether she simply gave in to the pressure from the most powerful man in the community. Regardless of why she changed her mind, her on-principle reluctance to remarry indicates that she had been managing quite well on her own.

If this story is true, Muhammad declined the offer. He told Zaynab that she had a “duty” to marry his son Zayd because that was what “Allah and his apostle” wished for her.<ref>{{Quran|33|36}}.</ref> At first she refused, supported by her brother Abdullah.<ref>[http://www.altafsir.com/Tafasir.asp?tMadhNo=1&tTafsirNo=74&tSoraNo=33&tAyahNo=36&tDisplay=yes&UserProfile=0&LanguageId=2/ Jalalayn's ''Tafsir'' on Q33:36.]</ref> But Abdullah was killed in the battle of Uhud,<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 607.</ref> and at about this time, Zaynab was talked into marrying Zayd.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 180}}.</ref> Zayd divorced her within two years, after which, according to Muhammad, Allah commanded her to marry Muhammad himself.<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918; {{Bukhari|9|93|516}}; {{Tabari|39|pp. 180-181}}.</ref>

Although it was obvious that Zaynab had no economic need of a new husband, modern historians sometimes claim that she might have had a social or moral need to remarry. They report such claims as, “Before Islam, the Arabs did not allow divorcees to remarry,”<ref>Abdallati, H. ''Islam in Focus'', pp.177-179, cited in “Rebuttal to Sam Shamoun’s Article Muhammad’s Multiplicity of Marriages” in ''Answering Christianity''.</ref> and that her divorce “made her unfit to marry a status conscious Arab.”<ref>[http://www.scribd.com/doc/133159128/The-Real-Men-of-the-Renaissance-Badreddine-Belhamissi/ Aly, A. (1999). ''The Real Men of the Renaissance'', p. 26. Belhamissi.]</ref> This is an imaginary problem. There is no evidence that the Arabs forbade divorced women to remarry. On the contrary, Abu Sufyan’s favourite wife, Hind bint Utbah, had been a divorcée.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:165; Al-Suyuti, ''Tarikh al-Khulafa''. Translated by Jarrett, H. S. (1881). ''History of the Caliphs'', pp. 200-201. Calcutta: The Asiatic Society.</ref> Abu Sufyan's clan, the Umayyads, had been the dominant clan of the Quraysh even before Abu Sufyan became the high chief of Mecca;<ref>E.g., see Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> what was socially acceptable for the Umayyads was, by definition, acceptable for everyone. Muhammad did not marry Zaynab to rescue her from social disapprobation; rather, he created significant social disapprobation in order that he might marry her.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 9}}. "The ''Munafiqun'' made this a topic of their conversation and reviled the Prophet, saying, 'Muhammad prohibits (marriage) with the (former) wives of one's own sons, but he married the (former) wife of his son Zayd.'"</ref>

To claim that Muhammad married Rayhanah because she was “a poor widow” is perverse. Rayhanah was a member of the [[Jews|Jewish]] [[Banu Qurayza|Qurayza]] tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 164-165}}.</ref> whom Muhammad besieged in 627. When the tribe surrendered, Muhammad ordered that every adult male should be decapitated, that every woman and child should become his [[Slavery|slave]] and that all the property was forfeit to the Islamic state.<ref>Guillaume/Ibn Ishaq 689-692.</ref> So Rayhanah was only a widow because Muhammad had killed her husband and she was only poor because Muhammad had appropriated her property.

If Muhammad had made enquiries about how to help the Qurayza slaves, he would have quickly realized that Rayhanah was one of the least destitute, for she was only a Quraziya by marriage. By birth she belonged to the Nadir tribe,<ref>{{Tabari|39|pp. 164-165}}.</ref> who were currently residing in the date-farms of Khaybar.<ref> Guillaume/Ishaq 437-438.</ref> If Muhammad had wanted to provide for Rayhanah, he would have sent her back to her own family. The Nadir were making every effort to assist the surviving Qurayza. They searched the Arabian slave-markets and they bought back as many Qurayza women and children as they found there.<ref>Cited in [http://www.kister.huji.ac.il/content/massacre-ban%C5%AB-quray%E1%BA%93-re-examination-tradition?lang=english/ Kister, M. J. (1986). The Massacre of the Banū Qurayẓa: A Re-Examination of a Tradition. ''Jerusalem Studies in Arabic and Islam, 8'', 61-96.]</ref> Since Rayhanah was a Nadriya by birth, her tribe would certainly have ransomed her too if only she had been for sale.

But Muhammad had selected Rayhanah for himself. She showed “repugnance towards Islam” and refused to marry him, but he kept her as a concubine anyway.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref>

After Muhammad defeated the Qurayza, he was no longer poor<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> and he could afford to keep his family. Although Aisha claims, as noted above, that he never did this very adequately, he had at least in theory the means to support his wives. It is also likely that the Muslim men no longer outnumbered the women, as the acquisition of hundreds of female slaves<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 466.</ref> had redressed the gender imbalance. There is therefore some justification for the claim that, from 627 onwards, Muhammad was in a position to provide a home for the “excess women” who were unable to marry monogamously. What remains to be established, however, is whether or not the particular widows whom he married were the ones who would have been otherwise left destitute.