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*She is all alone during the ‘Iddah period to financially secure herself and her children.<br /> | *She is all alone during the ‘Iddah period to financially secure herself and her children.<br /> | ||
===Islam Advocates: Strict 'restrictions' are placed upon the divorced woman during the 'Iddah due to the danger of indulging in a SIN=== | ===Islam Advocates: Strict 'restrictions' are placed upon the divorced woman during the 'Iddah due to the danger of her indulging in a SIN=== | ||
But Islam critics don't agree with this excuse, while: | But Islam critics don't agree with this excuse, while: | ||
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*And if normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to use the Kohl in their eyes, and parfum, and comb their hairs, and use the jewelry, and to wear good clothes, and use henna, or to wash their faces with Aloe, and still they don't indulge into sin, why then a divorced woman or a widow will indulge in the sin for doing the same thing? | *And if normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to use the Kohl in their eyes, and parfum, and comb their hairs, and use the jewelry, and to wear good clothes, and use henna, or to wash their faces with Aloe, and still they don't indulge into sin, why then a divorced woman or a widow will indulge in the sin for doing the same thing? | ||
===Muhammad | ===Did Muhammad copy this practice of ‘Iddah from the pre-Islamic period of Ignorance?=== | ||
Islam critics claim that: | Islam critics claim that: | ||
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{{Quote|{{Bukhari|||5336|darussalam}}|Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said,''' "No." Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year)." '''}}Islam critics object that this reason (which was given by Muhammad in the above mentioned hadith) is illogical. An oppression does not become legal while it is on smaller scale than the previous larger scale oppression. | {{Quote|{{Bukhari|||5336|darussalam}}|Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said,''' "No." Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year)." '''}}Islam critics object that this reason (which was given by Muhammad in the above mentioned hadith) is illogical. An oppression does not become legal while it is on smaller scale than the previous larger scale oppression. | ||
== | ==Reason for 'iddah of a widow== | ||
Islam advocates claim that reason for the 4 month and 10 days long 'iddah of a widow is to ''''mourn'''<nowiki/>' the death of the husband<ref>Reason for 4 months 10 days long Iddah of a widow [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/88684/rights-of-a-deceased-husband-on-his-wife]</ref>. | Islam advocates claim that reason for the 4 month and 10 days long 'iddah of a widow is to ''''mourn'''<nowiki/>' the death of the husband<ref>Reason for 4 months 10 days long Iddah of a widow [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/88684/rights-of-a-deceased-husband-on-his-wife]</ref>. | ||
While Islam critics object upon it while: | While Islam critics object upon it while: | ||
*There is no obligation of any “mourning” upon a man if the wife dies. This makes it a double standard situation against the women. | *There is no obligation of any “mourning” upon a man if the wife dies. This makes it a double standard situation against the women. | ||
*Husband is totally free to marry a new wife the same night. | *Husband is totally free to marry a new wife the same night. | ||
*And he is also totally free to have sex with his other wives and dozens of slave girls the same night, and there is no restriction upon him in name of ‘mourning’. | *And he is also totally free to have sex with his other wives and dozens of slave girls the same night, and there is no restriction upon him in name of ‘mourning’. | ||
*Only the woman is compelled to ‘mourn’ the death of her husband. | *Only the woman is compelled to ‘mourn’ the death of her husband. | ||
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Moreover, Islamic critics also criticise Islamic Sharia, while it says that a widow has also to observe 'Iddah, even if <ref>Widow has to observe 'Iddah even if she never saw the husband after the marriage, or even if she is a small child. [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/145179/the-waiting-period-of-an-old-woman-after-the-death-of-her-husband]</ref>: | Moreover, Islamic critics also criticise Islamic Sharia, while it says that a widow has also to observe 'Iddah, even if <ref>Widow has to observe 'Iddah even if she never saw the husband after the marriage, or even if she is a small child. [https://www.islamweb.net/en/fatwa/145179/the-waiting-period-of-an-old-woman-after-the-death-of-her-husband]</ref>: | ||
* She has never seen his husband after the marriage. | *She has never seen his husband after the marriage. | ||
* Or even if the marriage has not been consummated. | *Or even if the marriage has not been consummated. | ||
* Or even if she is a small child. | *Or even if she is a small child. | ||
* Islam critics thus question why should she mourn if she no emotional connection and love for him in her heart? | *Islam critics thus question why should she mourn if she no emotional connection and love for him in her heart? | ||
*What if the husband was abusive and he tortured her when he was alive, and thus she HATED him? This is cruel to still compel a woman for such a long obligatorily waiting period, with so many restrictions. | *What if the husband was abusive and he tortured her when he was alive, and thus she HATED him? This is cruel to still compel a woman for such a long obligatorily waiting period, with so many restrictions. | ||
Therefore, Islam critics point out that Islam could have left it upon the woman: | Therefore, Islam critics point out that Islam could have left it upon the woman: | ||
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*That she decides if living in her deceased husband’s house is causing her unnecessary mental stress or not. | *That she decides if living in her deceased husband’s house is causing her unnecessary mental stress or not. | ||
*That she decides for herself if she needs the help and love of her parents and family or not by staying with them. | *That she decides for herself if she needs the help and love of her parents and family or not by staying with them. | ||
*Woman is not a “'''Brainless Creature'''”, who is unable to even decide for the matters which are only related to her and her personal life? | *Woman is not a “'''Brainless Creature'''”, who is unable to even decide for the matters which are only related to her and her personal life? | ||
== | ==Reason for the 'Iddah of a pregnant woman== | ||
According to the Quran, the waiting period of a pregnant woman is till the birth of a child ([https://quranx.com/65.4 Quran 65:4]). | According to the Quran, the waiting period of a pregnant woman is till the birth of a child ([https://quranx.com/65.4 Quran 65:4]). | ||
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Islam critics objects that this is a scientific mistake, while: | Islam critics objects that this is a scientific mistake, while: | ||
* Science is very clear if woman has already become pregnant, then other man could do as much sex as possible, but his sperms are not going to have any effects upon the fetus (i.e. he is not going to water the fetus from previous man). No DNA changes are going to take place in the fetus due to the sex. These were the concepts of times of ignorance, and Muhammad took this concept from them. | *Science is very clear if woman has already become pregnant, then other man could do as much sex as possible, but his sperms are not going to have any effects upon the fetus (i.e. he is not going to water the fetus from previous man). No DNA changes are going to take place in the fetus due to the sex. These were the concepts of times of ignorance, and Muhammad took this concept from them. | ||
Moreover, Islam critics also points out that once again the pregnant woman has to bear the consequences of this practice unilaterally. | Moreover, Islam critics also points out that once again the pregnant woman has to bear the consequences of this practice unilaterally. | ||
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*What if the deceased husband left no money for her and the baby? | *What if the deceased husband left no money for her and the baby? | ||
*And it is impossible for her to go to the work outside while carrying the baby in her belly. | *And it is impossible for her to go to the work outside while carrying the baby in her belly. | ||
*A woman is in a state of extreme emotion during the pregnancy. This is exactly the time when she needs emotional support the most from a partner, who could take care of her, or of her father/mother/family, but she is compelled to stay at the husband's house. | *A woman is in a state of extreme emotion during the pregnancy. This is exactly the time when she needs emotional support the most from a partner, who could take care of her, or of her father/mother/family, but she is compelled to stay at the husband's house. | ||
*She is compelled to face all these difficulties 'alone' till the birth of the baby. | *She is compelled to face all these difficulties 'alone' till the birth of the baby. | ||
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*If husband could divorce such a pregnant woman and then start having sex with dozens of other slave girls and wives, why then should the pregnant woman be deprived of the emotional support and love and attention and care of the new partner, in a hard time when she needs these things the most? | *If husband could divorce such a pregnant woman and then start having sex with dozens of other slave girls and wives, why then should the pregnant woman be deprived of the emotional support and love and attention and care of the new partner, in a hard time when she needs these things the most? | ||
== Islam Advocates: Reasons for the 'Iddah in case of divorce == | ==Islam Advocates: Reasons for the 'Iddah in case of divorce== | ||
Islam critics point out that: | Islam critics point out that: | ||
*The whole process of Divorce + ‘Iddah lasts for 6 menstrual cycles for a divorced woman. | *The whole process of Divorce + ‘Iddah lasts for 6 menstrual cycles for a divorced woman. | ||
*If Muslim husband decides to give her a divorce, then woman is still compelled to stay for the next 3 menstrual cycles with him in his house. | *If Muslim husband decides to give her a divorce, then woman is still compelled to stay for the next 3 menstrual cycles with him in his house<ref>Woman has to stay for 3 menstrual cycles at home of husband during the process of [https://abukhadeejah.com/divorce-talaq-iddah-remarriage-khula/ Talaq] </ref>. | ||
*During these 3 months, wife is not allowed to come in contact with any man. And her husband also does not touch her. She is again in a 'solitary confinement' like situation in the house of her husband. | *During these 3 months, wife is not allowed to come in contact with any man. And her husband also does not touch her. She is again in a 'solitary confinement' like situation in the house of her husband. | ||
*But the husband is free to have sex with other wives and slave girls during all this time. | *But the husband is free to have sex with other wives and slave girls during all this time. | ||
*And after the divorce, she again has to undergo a waiting period of 3 more menstrual cycles. | *And after the divorce, she again has to undergo a waiting period of 3 more menstrual cycles<ref>'Iddah of 3 menstrual cycles after the divorce.[https://www.islamic-sharia.org/downloads/talaq/]</ref>. But why? There is no issue of parentage of the child either, while her husband didn’t touch her for the last 3 menstrual cycles. And there is no option of reunion of both of them after the divorce, till the time she undergoes the Quranic Halala. So, why is the woman then still forced to undergo solitary confinement like situation for the next 3 more months in the name of ‘Iddah? | ||
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===Islam Critics: The process of Divorce in Islam is again UNJUST towards the women=== | |||
Islam advocates claim that a woman has to stay in the house of husband for 3 menstrual cycles during the process of divorce, while this could provide them with the chance to reconcile<ref>Staying in husband's home during the process of divorce.[https://abukhadeejah.com/divorce-talaq-iddah-remarriage-khula/]</ref>. | |||
But Islam critics object to this process of divorce, and ask: | |||
* But what if the husband is an abusive evil person? What if he tortures her all this period without any reason? What if he beats her so wildly that she gets bruises all over her body? Why they still she has to still stay with such an abusive husband for 3 months? (Please read the [[Khul']] article, that woman could not get her freedom through Khul', even if the husband is abusive and tortures her. Only if he breaks any part of her body, in that case she could get her freedom through the court) | |||
* Only the woman is forced to sacrifice in the name of so-called “reconcilement” in this Islamic Talaq process, while husband has to bring no sacrifice. He is free to have sex with all other wives and slave girls during this whole period of 3 months. | |||
Moreover: | |||
* Is there any guarantee that this dispute between husband and wife is going to resolve in 3 months time of Talaq process? | |||
* Is it not possible that it may take more than 3 months that both of them come back in their senses and end the dispute after this period? For example, a man comes back to his senses after 1 years, and realises that it was a mistake to divorce his wife and she was totally innocent. Then what are the options available there to undo this mistake? The answer is, there are NO more options available, while she could not return to him without undergoing the process of Halala, which is considered as a shameful process. So, what then is the 'Divine Wisdom' in this ruling, which limits this reconcilationary period to only 3 menstrual cycles? | |||
Moreover: | |||
* Islam compels the woman to stay in the house of husband during the process of Talaq. While it has been seen that in cases of disputes, it could also be helpful that both parties take a break from each other and live separately for some period of time. | |||
* This provides both parties with chance to ponder upon, and to learn from their mistakes in a better way and they realise their mistakes in a better way. | |||
* When wife has to face the difficulties in living in house of her parents or brothers/sisters, then she realises quickly the importance of house of her husband. And when husband has to do all the work in the house alone, and has to take care of the children alone too, then he also realises his mistake quickly. | |||
* But Islam closed this option for them by ordering the woman for not leaving the husband's house even in case of serious disputes. | |||
=== Islam Critics: Pronouncing 3 Divorces in one sitting is also illogical and an Injustice towards the woman === | |||
Islam advocates say that Islam also allows pronouncing 3 divorces in one sitting, which will spare the woman of 3 months restrictions of divorce process. But Islam critics again object upon it and point out that: | |||
* Only may is allowed to give Talaq in this way. Why these double standards? Is woman a 'brainless emotional creature', who could not take decisions about her own life. | |||
* And this divorce becomes valid even if the wife was totally innocent, and he only pronounced 3 divorces in '''ANGER'''. This proves that blaming only women for being emotionally unstable is not correct, but men could also become totally emotionally unstable, especially in the state of Anger and they are capable of doing every kind of stupid things, including killing others. | |||
* What type of '''Divine Wisdom''' is this, then to give right to such emotionally unstable men in anger to divorce their wives in 3 seconds, by saying 3 times Talaq Talaq Talaq? | |||
* The consequences of such 3 times Talaq in anger has to be bear by the poor innocent wife, where her whole family is destroyed and she may loose her children too. | |||
* And despite being totally innocent, again only she is forced to undergo the shameful process of Halala too, if she wishes to reunite with here family (i.e. husband and the children). | |||
* Is it really that giving rights with Justice to the woman by Islam? | |||
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