Muhammad's Marriages: Difference between revisions

This article analyzes the often-asserted claim that most of Prophet [[Muhammad]]’s [[Muhammad's Wives|wives]] were poor widows whom he married to save them from a life of destitution.

People who assert that Muhammad “married poor widows” do not include [[Khadijah]] or [[Aisha]]. Everyone agrees that “Khadijah was a merchant woman of dignity and wealth”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 82.</ref> who eventually expended all that wealth on maintaining Islam.<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118.</ref> It is also agreed that Aisha, beside being a spinster,<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> was the daughter of “a man of means,”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 223.</ref> “a merchant of high character” with “experience in commerce.”<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 114.</ref> She already had a fiancé at the time of Muhammad’s proposal, and her father had to break off this engagement before marrying her to Muhammad,<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 129-130}}.</ref> so she was certainly not looking to Muhammad to take care of her.

Muhammad married Sawdah in May 620.<ref>{{Tabari|39|p. 170}}.</ref> It is not known how Muhamnmad was making his living in his last few years in Mecca, but he does not seem to have been able to re-launch Khadijah’s merchant business. If it is true that ''all'' of Khadijah’s wealth had been expended in the days of the blockade,<ref>Ibn Hanbal, ''Musnad'' vol. 6 pp. 117-118.</ref> Muhammad was now bankrupt. He certainly did not seem to have any resources of his own by the time of the ''Hijra'' in September 622: all the expenses of his journey were paid by Abu Bakr.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 223</ref>

By contrast, Sawdah was a tanner<ref>Bearman, P., Bianquis, T., Bosworth, C. E., Donzel E. van, & Heinrichs, W. P. (Eds.). (1960–2005). “''Dabbagh''” in ''The Encyclopaedia of Islam, 2nd Ed.'' Leiden: E. J. Brill. See also Ghadanfar, M. A. (2001). ''Great Women of Islam''. Translated by J. M. Qawi, p. 16. Riyadh: Darussalam.</ref> and a perfume-mixer.<ref>[http://www.alim.org/library/hadith/TIR/927/ Tirmidhi 927.]</ref> So she was not in penury; she had the means to earn her own living. Nor was she alone, for she lived with her father and brother.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 130}}.</ref> It is not stated that they were wealthy, but they were respectable. Sawdah also had a son, Abdulrahman ibn Sakhran,<ref>Zarqani 2:260 states that he was killed at the Battle of Jalula in 637. If Sawda was born c. 580, she could easily have given birth to a son before 600.</ref> who is never mentioned as being part of Muhammad’s household. This suggests that by 620 he was an adult who did not need to move in with his new stepfather if he preferred to remain with his blood-relations; therefore he was also old enough to work to contribute to the family expenses. Sawdah’s father approved of her marriage to Muhammad, but her brother did not. Sawdah and Muhammad took care to finalise their union on a day when her brother was out of town; when he returned home and heard the news, he poured dust on his head.<ref>{{Tabari|9|p. 130}}.</ref> It seems he would rather have taken financial responsibility for his sister for the rest of his life than seen her married to his enemy.

As a general commentary on the social problems in the Muslim community, it should be noted that at this early date, the Muslims had not fought a single battle. No Muslim “died in the wars” before the [[Islam Undressed: The Battle of Badr|Battle of Badr]] in 624,<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 289ff.</ref> an event that nobody could have foreseen in 620. In fact the only Muslim who had so far died violently was a woman.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 145.</ref> So it is not true that there was a problem with finding enough men to take care of the numerous widows. On the contrary, the gender imbalance appears to have been in the opposite direction. The Egyptian scholar Al-Suyuti compares different traditions about Umar’s conversion in 616: “He embraced the faith early — after the conversion of 40 men and 10 women — or as some say, after 39 men and 23 women, and others, 45 men and 11 women.”<ref>Al-Suyuti, ''Tarikh al-Khulafa''. Translation by Jarrett, H. S. (1881). ''History of the Caliphs'', p. 112. Caclutta: The Asiatic Society.</ref> In fact all these numbers are wrong, for Ibn Ishaq’s list of Muslims who emigrated to Abyssinia in 615 includes 83 men and 18 women.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 146-148.</ref> His list of Muslims converted by Abu Bakr has 41 men and 9 women.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 115-117.</ref> One consistency among all these lists, however, is that the early Muslims seemed to comprise ''far'' more men than women, probably twice as many. Besides, many of the Muslim women whose names are missing from these early lists<ref>There is no mention of Khadijah and her daughters, nor of Umm Ruman, nor of the numerous sisters of Lubabah bint Al-Harith ({{Tabari|39|p. 201}}).</ref> were married to pagan men; so even if they had been “numerous” (although they probably were not), they would not have been part of any problem of “homeless widows”.

Zaynab had plenty of family in Medina. At her funeral, just eight months after her wedding, “three of her brothers” were present.<ref>Bewley/Saad 8:82.</ref> Her deceased husband Ubayda also had two brothers, Al-Tufayl and Al-Husayn, who had accompanied him to Medina<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 218.</ref> and had fought with him at Badr.<ref>Guillaume/Ishaq 328.</ref> Further, Zaynab was on good terms with her pagan relatives in Mecca. Her cousin Qubaysa ibn Amr made the journey out to Medina so that he could arrange her marriage to Muhammad,<ref>Ibn Hisham note 918.</ref> even though this could have easily been done by one of her brothers in Medina.