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*'''A widow woman''': Waiting period is 4 months and 10 days | *'''A widow woman''': Waiting period is 4 months and 10 days | ||
*'''A pregnant woman''': Waiting period is up to 9 months (till the birth of the baby) | *'''A pregnant woman''': Waiting period is up to 9 months (till the birth of the baby) | ||
*'''A divorced woman''': Waiting period is 3 menstrual cycles. (However, Islam critics point out that actually she | *'''A divorced woman''': Waiting period is 3 menstrual cycles. (However, Islam critics point out that actually she would not get the attention and love and emotional help from any man for 6 menstrual cycles. The first 3 menstrual cycles are the process of Divorce, in which she could not leave the husband's house, and her husband does not touch her. And after the divorce, again she has to stay in the "waiting period" of 3 more menstrual cycles with many restrictions. She practically has to stay under these strict restrictions for about 6 months). | ||
Muslim Scholars claim that rulings of 'Iddah could neither be abolished, nor changed as the rulings of the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sharia Islamic Sharia] are based upon wisdom, justice and the best interests of the women, and they protect the women against the gender oppression and misogyny, while the man made laws of the modern Western world lead to the sexual exploitation of the women<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/39286 Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website: Is it correct to think that fatwas may vary according to time and place?] </ref><ref>[https://yaqeeninstitute.org/read/paper/women-in-islamic-law-examining-five-prevalent-myths Women in Islamic Law: Examining Five Prevalent Myths]</ref>. | Muslim Scholars claim that rulings of 'Iddah could neither be abolished, nor could be changed as the rulings of the [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sharia Islamic Sharia] are based upon wisdom, justice and the best interests of the women, and they protect the women against the gender oppression and misogyny, while the man made laws of the modern Western world lead to the sexual exploitation of the women<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/39286 Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website: Is it correct to think that fatwas may vary according to time and place?] </ref><ref>[https://yaqeeninstitute.org/read/paper/women-in-islamic-law-examining-five-prevalent-myths Women in Islamic Law: Examining Five Prevalent Myths]</ref>. | ||
While Islam critics claim that: | While Islam critics claim that: | ||
*'Iddah rulings are illogical, and thus they have contradictions. | *'Iddah rulings are illogical, and thus they have contradictions. | ||
*And all these restrictions of 'Iddah are only targeting the women and only women have to suffer unilaterally. | *And all these restrictions of 'Iddah are only targeting the women and only women have to suffer unilaterally, while men are totally free to enjoy their life. | ||
==‘Iddah and the ‘parentage’ of the child== | ==‘Iddah and the ‘parentage’ of the child== | ||
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*Becoming free of blood of the first menstrual cycle is enough to know if the woman is pregnant or not, and about the “parentage” of the child. | *Becoming free of blood of the first menstrual cycle is enough to know if the woman is pregnant or not, and about the “parentage” of the child. | ||
*That is why Islam itself stipulated the ‘Iddah (waiting period) of only one menstrual cycle for the prisoner/slave woman<ref>[https://sunnah.com/abudawud:2158 Sunnan Abu Dawud: 2158]</ref>, and a free Muslim woman who takes divorce through Khul'<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/5163/does-iddah-apply-in-the-case-of-khula Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website]</ref>. | *That is why Islam itself stipulated the ‘Iddah (waiting period) of only one menstrual cycle for the prisoner/slave woman<ref>[https://sunnah.com/abudawud:2158 Sunnan Abu Dawud: 2158]</ref>, and also of a free Muslim woman who takes divorce through [[Khul']]<ref>[https://islamqa.info/en/answers/5163/does-iddah-apply-in-the-case-of-khula Islam Question Answer Fatwa Website]</ref>. | ||
*After this first menstrual cycle, Muslim men are allowed to have sex with them. | *After this first menstrual cycle, Muslim men are allowed to have sex with them. | ||
*Muhammad himself had sex with Saffiyah the same night, when in the day her father, brother and husband was killed, while she became free from blood of her first menstrual cycle the same day<ref>[https://sunnah.com/bukhari/64/251 Sahih Bukhari:2158]</ref>. Muhammad married her as a free woman. | *Muhammad himself had sex with Saffiyah the same night, when in the day her father, brother and husband was killed, while she became free from blood of her first menstrual cycle the same day<ref>[https://sunnah.com/bukhari/64/251 Sahih Bukhari:2158]</ref>. Muhammad married her as a free woman. | ||
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Thus Islam Critics point out that: | Thus Islam Critics point out that: | ||
*A woman has | *A woman has no choice, but to compulsorily undergo the 'Iddah of period of 4 months and 10 days (or up to 9 months in case of pregnancy), but she has no right for maintenance money from the estate of her husband for this long period of time. | ||
*This is a huge financial burden upon the women, who often don't even have any source of income in the Islamic countries. | *This is a huge financial burden upon the women, who often don't even have any source of income in the Islamic countries. | ||
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Islam critics object here that: | Islam critics object here that: | ||
*What does that have to do with the ‘parentage’ of the child where | *What does that have to do with the ‘parentage’ of the child where she stays after the death of her husband? | ||
*Why could she not spend the waiting period in the house of her parents, where she feels comfortable and where she is among the people who love her? | *Why could she not spend the waiting period in the house of her parents, where she feels comfortable and where she is among the people who love her? This could help her immensely to come out of the sorrow of the death of her husband. | ||
*And in the house of her husband, she could be all alone, and she has to live like she is in a | *And in the house of her husband, she could be all alone, and she has to live like she is in a 'solitary confinement' like situation, while she is not allowed to leave the house, and she could not come in contact with any man. | ||
*Moreover, it could be a huge mental torture for many women to live for 4 long months (or upto 9 months in case of pregnancy) in the house where their husbands died | *Moreover, it could be a huge mental torture for many women to live for 4 long months (or upto 9 months in case of pregnancy) in the house where their husbands died. | ||
===She has to stay in the husband’s house, even if it doesn’t belong to her husband, or even if he hasn’t left any maintenance money for the wife=== | ===She has to stay in the husband’s house, even if it doesn’t belong to her husband, or even if he hasn’t left any maintenance money for the wife=== | ||
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*How is it a 'justice' with a woman that firstly she is compelled to live in that house, and secondly then also to pay for the rent? | *How is it a 'justice' with a woman that firstly she is compelled to live in that house, and secondly then also to pay for the rent? | ||
*Why is she compelled to bear the expenses of her daily needs at her own, while her family could | *Why is she compelled to bear the expenses of her daily needs at her own, while her family could have taken care of her easily if she would have stayed in the house of her parents/brothers/sisters. | ||
===Third Restriction: She could not leave the house even for daily walks, or visit the relatives or attend any social gathering=== | ===Third Restriction: She could not leave the house even for daily walks, or visit the relatives or attend any social gathering=== | ||
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*All these restrictions are non-Natural and against the human nature. | *All these restrictions are non-Natural and against the human nature. | ||
*And putting these restrictions 'unilaterally' only upon the women does not constitute to 'doing Justice with the women'. | *And putting these restrictions 'unilaterally' only upon the women does not constitute to 'doing Justice with the women'. | ||
*These restrictions are draconian, and practically putting a woman in a 'solitary confinement' like situation. | |||
===Fourth Restriction: She could not even use collyrium/kohl in eyes despite eye disease, while it beautifies her=== | ===Fourth Restriction: She could not even use collyrium/kohl in eyes despite eye disease, while it beautifies her=== | ||
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===Fifth Restriction: Women are not allowed to use good clothes, jewelry, perfume, Henna and to comb the hairs or to oil them=== | ===Fifth Restriction: Women are not allowed to use good clothes, jewelry, perfume, Henna and to comb the hairs or to oil them=== | ||
Women in 'Iddah are not allowed to wear good clothes, or jewelry, or use perfume or Henna. Even combing hairs and applying the oil to them is also forbidden<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20211028112250/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45291/laws-of-the-iddat/ IslamQA Fatwa Website]</ref>. And even washing the face with aloe is also forbidden. | Women in 'Iddah are not allowed to wear good clothes, or jewelry, or use perfume or Henna. Even combing hairs and applying the oil to them is also forbidden<ref>[https://web.archive.org/web/20211028112250/https://islamqa.org/hanafi/askmufti/45291/laws-of-the-iddat/ IslamQA Fatwa Website]</ref>. And even washing the face with aloe is also forbidden. | ||
{{Quote|[https://sunnah.com/mishkat:3333 Mishkat al-Masabih 3333]|Umm Salama said: God’s Messenger came to visit me when Abu Salama died, and I had put the juice of aloes on myself. He asked me what it was, and I told him it was only the juice of aloes and contained no perfume, so he said, “It gives the face a glow, so apply it only at night and remove it in the daytime, and do not comb yourself with scent or henna, for it is a dye.” I asked God’s Messenger what I should use when combing myself, and he told me to use lote-tree leaves and smear my head copiously with them. Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani declared this Hadith to be FAIR (حسن) (link).}} | {{Quote|[https://sunnah.com/mishkat:3333 Mishkat al-Masabih 3333]|Umm Salama said: God’s Messenger came to visit me when Abu Salama died, and I had put the juice of aloes on myself. He asked me what it was, and I told him it was only the juice of aloes and contained no perfume, so he said, “It gives the face a glow, so apply it only at night and remove it in the daytime, and do not comb yourself with scent or henna, for it is a dye.” I asked God’s Messenger what I should use when combing myself, and he told me to use lote-tree leaves and smear my head copiously with them. Ibn Hajar al-Asqalani declared this Hadith to be FAIR (حسن) (link).}}Islam critics question here the Islamic logic, that: | ||
=== Sixth Restriction: She should give up her Natural needs of getting any emotional support and attention and love from any other partner during the ‘Iddah === | * A woman is not coming in any kind of contact with any man during the 'iddah, as she is not allowed to let any non-Mahram man to enter her house, and she is herself not allowed to leave the house. | ||
* So, what is wrong if she wear good clothes, and jewelry, and use perfume, and use henna and comb her hairs with oil, and wash her face with aloe in the house, where she is alone, or at maximum with other women? | |||
* At maximum, the usage of perfume could be restricted in case if she had to leave the house in urgent situation. | |||
===Sixth Restriction: She should give up her Natural needs of getting any emotional support and attention and love from any other partner during the ‘Iddah=== | |||
Islam critics point out that: | Islam critics point out that: | ||
* Need of sex is not only limited to men, but it is a natural need of woman too. But Islam does not recognise this right and natural need of a woman, and it has limited it to the man only. Thus, a woman is not allowed to have sex with any partner for this long period of time of ‘Iddah. | *Need of sex is not only limited to men, but it is a natural need of woman too. But Islam does not recognise this right and natural need of a woman, and it has limited it to the man only. Thus, a woman is not allowed to have sex with any partner for this long period of time of ‘Iddah. | ||
* But sex is not the only problem, while divorce or death of husband also comes with extreme emotional stress for the woman. This is exactly the time when | *But sex is not the only problem, while divorce or death of husband also comes with extreme emotional stress for the woman. This is exactly the time when some of them may need emotional support and attention from a caring partner the most, who could talk with them and give them love and attention, so that they feel themselves “secure” in the partner's arms. | ||
*On the other hand, Muslim men are allowed to have sex with other wives and dozens of slave-girls the same night. There is absolutely no restrictions upon them to even control themselves for even for a single day. | |||
=== Seventh Restriction: She could not secure herself and her children financially through relationship with any other partner in the ‘Iddah === | ===Seventh Restriction: She could not secure herself and her children financially through relationship with any other partner in the ‘Iddah=== | ||
Islam critics | Islam critics object here that the Hadith of Furay'ah (which has already been mentioned above) proves that a woman has to stay in the waiting period in the house of her deceased husband, even though he left no maintenance money for her. | ||
* And women in Islamic society are poorly educated. | *And women in Islamic society are poorly educated. | ||
* And Islamic society also does not provide women with job opportunities too, but she has to face so many hurdles in doing a job outside. | *And Islamic society also does not provide women with job opportunities too, but she has to face so many hurdles in doing a job outside. | ||
* Thus, the best bet for such a divorced/widow woman (even if she is pregnant) is to get another partner and get herself and her children financially secured in this way. | *Thus, the best bet for such a divorced/widow Muslim woman (even if she is pregnant) is to get another partner and get herself and her children financially secured in this way. | ||
* But Islam has also completely blocked | *But Islam has also completely blocked this opportunity for the woman too. Neither other men are allowed to see her, nor to meet her and decide if they could come into the relationship, nor they could make any proposal to them. | ||
* She is all alone during the ‘Iddah period to financially secure herself and her children.<br /> | *She is all alone during the ‘Iddah period to financially secure herself and her children.<br /> | ||
===Islam Advocates: Strict 'restrictions' are placed upon the divorced woman during the 'Iddah due to the danger of | ===Islam Advocates: Strict 'restrictions' are placed upon the divorced woman during the 'Iddah due to the danger of indulging in a SIN=== | ||
But Islam critics don't agree with this excuse, while: | But Islam critics don't agree with this excuse, while: | ||
*If normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to go outside to entertain themselves in the Parks, and for picnic, and attend the social gatherings, and visit their relatives, and sleep in their parent's home, and attend the funerals of their parents and they don't indulge into sin, why then a widow or a divorced woman will indulge in the sin for doing these same things? | *If normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to go outside to entertain themselves in the Parks, and for picnic, and attend the social gatherings, and visit their relatives, and sleep in their parent's home, and attend the funerals of their parents and they don't indulge into sin, why then a widow or a divorced woman will indulge in the sin for doing these same things? | ||
*And if normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to use the Kohl in their eyes, and parfum, and comb their hairs, and use the jewelry, and to wear good clothes, and use henna, or to wash their faces with Aloe, and still they don't indulge into sin, why then a divorced woman will indulge in the sin for doing the same thing? | *And if normal Muslim women (or even the virgin Muslim girls) are allowed to use the Kohl in their eyes, and parfum, and comb their hairs, and use the jewelry, and to wear good clothes, and use henna, or to wash their faces with Aloe, and still they don't indulge into sin, why then a divorced woman or a widow will indulge in the sin for doing the same thing? | ||
===Muhammad copied this practice of ‘Iddah from the pre-Islamic period of Ignorance=== | |||
Islam critics claim that: | |||
* Muhammad copied this ‘Iddah from the culture of people of Pre-Islam period of ignorance. | |||
* And when Muslim women protested upon it, then Muhammad told the women to accept all these Islamic restriction of waiting period while they last only for 4 months and 10 days, and while they had to stay in 'Iddah for complete one year in the pre-Islamic days. | |||
And as a proof, Islam critics quote the following hadith: | |||
{{Quote|{{Bukhari|||5336|darussalam}}|Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said,''' "No." Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year)." '''}} | |||
Sahih Bukhari, Book of Divorce:<blockquote>Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said, "No." '''Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year). | Sahih Bukhari, Book of Divorce:<blockquote>Um Salama said that a woman came to Allah's Messenger and said, "O Allah's Messenger ! The husband of my daughter has died and she is suffering from an eye disease. Can she apply collyrium/kohl to her eye?" Allah's Messenger replied, "No," twice or thrice. (Every time she repeated her question) he said, "No." '''Then Allah's Messenger added, "It is just a matter of four months and ten days. In the Pre-Islamic Period of ignorance a widow among you should throw a globe of dung when one year has elapsed (i.e. she had to stay in ‘Iddah for the whole one year).'''</blockquote><br /> | ||
=='''Muslim Excuse about the ‘Iddah of a widow women'''== | =='''Muslim Excuse about the ‘Iddah of a widow women'''== | ||